Chapter 4
Cat
July
When we return from our mini-vacation, I don’t tell Ava Nick proposed.
I didn’t want her to say I was crazy and foolish for not saying yes.
I also think I’m foolish and crazy for not saying yes to a man in love with me, the father of my unborn child, because of my family, who would rather see me pregnant alone and miserable. I know how it sounds.
I thought I would be relaxed and happy when school was out and I didn’t have to rush out for work every morning. I wouldn’t be so tired. Boy was I wrong.
The further I get into my pregnancy, the more tired I am.
I can’t sleep at night because I can’t lie in one position for too long.
I spend my days walking the streets of Manhattan and Brooklyn, sweaty and hot from the heat rising off the concrete.
I constantly have to stop inside stores to get relief from the comfort of the AC and to rest. Then I’m so guilty I feel like I have to buy something, usually food.
I’ve gained so much weight in the last month I feel like a puffed pastry.
The delicious kind, drizzled with cream cheese frosting, apple strudel filling oozing out with each yummy bite.
Nick says he likes the weight gain and so does my doctor, I’m already up twenty-five pounds.
It’s going to be a bitch to lose this weight after the baby’s born.
Pregnancy is not easy, but the sex is still good, albeit a little awkward with my belly in the way.
As long as Nick doesn’t complain, it’s all good.
He touches me all the time, especially my growing stomach, and talks to the baby.
I don’t mind, it lets me feel attractive when I’m feeling anything but, which is more often these days.
Nick and I haven’t talked about the proposal since we came back.
It’s hanging there in the air, not being addressed, and making me feel guilty.
He’s been working a lot. Spending a lot of late nights at the office.
He says he’s going to take two weeks off when the baby’s born to spend time with us.
He’s going to work from home, only going in when he has to, that’s why he’s working so hard.
With Nick being at work so much, it leaves more girl time for Ava and me.
Gage even pops in once in a while to make me blush at the wildly inappropriate things he says to me.
My family hasn’t come around or called me, except for Vanessa, and Chris stops by once a week to see how I’m doing.
He’s been there twice when Ava was over, and I caught him covertly checking her out a few times.
I haven’t said anything to Ava. She’s been doing well with being low key and not coming on too strong.
She’s learning how to get his attention and I think he’s taking notice of her sudden change in demeanor toward him.
She still puts it out there that she likes him, but it’s subtle.
Ava’s throwing me a baby shower I don’t want before my due date.
Chloe and Ava were going to throw it together but they couldn’t agree on who was in charge.
I wasn’t getting into it, because I told them I didn’t want it anyway, and I do not want more than ten to fifteen people there.
Bad enough there are whispers about me being with Nick when Kate was pregnant and engaged to him.
Unconfirmed, of course. I don’t want to be put on display.
I know someone is going to be bold enough to ask if the rumors are true. There’s always one Miriam in the pack.
The last time Chris and Ava were over at the same time, she was talking about the shower and making all sorts of lists.
She’s going way out of her way. I told her I want a simple shower but she can’t help herself, she has to do it up big with fifteen people.
Spending too much money on too much food and too much decorating.
She brought up the guest list and asked me if I wanted her to invite my mother.
I didn’t say anything, and neither did Nick.
Chris looked at Nick and Nick said, “What? I didn’t say anything!
” Chris said what I was thinking. “I know you not saying anything is saying a lot.”
The charity banquet Nick’s firm is throwing for Feed the Hungry is days away.
I already have my dress picked out; I just hope it still fits me by then.
I like being pregnant, but I can’t wait to get my body back to feel like myself again.
I spent the day with Isabelle and her son today.
That little boy has more energy than half of my kindergarten class did.
We made lunch at her house, and she was excited about the baby and talking up a storm about our kids being playmates and wouldn’t it be exciting if I had a girl and they got married.
I told her to slow down and let me have the baby first before she sends out save the date postcards.
On my way out, Ava called to tell me she sent the shower invitations out and she sent one to my mother.
I didn’t know how to feel about that. So I decided to surprise Nick at his office to tell him.
Karen looks up from her desk and smiles when she sees all of me.
“Hi, Karen.” I talk to Karen at least once a month since I’ve been pregnant. I let her know when my prenatal visits are so she can put them on Nick’s schedule, and we end up talking. She’s nice.
“Catherine, hi.” She stops writing and puts her pen down.
“Karen, I told you to call me Cat. I’m going to have to make a complaint to your boss.”
“You do and I’m going to deny it, Cat.”
I smile and put my hand on my expanding stomach.
“You look good.”
“Thank you. Don’t lie to me.”
“You do. How are you feeling?”
“Tired. But good. He isn’t expecting me, much like the first time I came to this office.” I smile, thinking about that day in his office, which set a lot of things in motion. It changed everything. “Is he busy?”
“If he is, he’ll stop what he’s doing to see you.”
“Don’t tell him I’m here. I want to surprise him.”
She smiles and puts her head down, waving me over to his door. “I don’t know you’re here.”
Opening his office door, I see he’s on the phone, standing in front of the window, his back turned to me.
I close the door quietly, standing behind it and wait for him to turn around.
He’s in an intense conversation. He tells the person he’ll be in contact with them soon, when he gets what he needs.
He turns to hang up the phone and sees me.
The angry intense look fades into a smile.
I smile back with relief that he’s not mad at me for listening in on his call and not announcing myself.
“Just what I need. A beautiful woman to brighten up my day.”
“You’re sweet.” He walks over, puts one hand above my head on the door, and kisses me deeply, leaving me sighing, my eyes closed when he pulls away. “I was feeling tired. Now your lips are stirring up renewed energy in me.”
He takes my hand and sits me down in his chair behind his desk then sits in front of me on the desk.
“What brings you back to the den?” His smile is warm and the sun is shining in his eyes through the window, making him look otherworldly.
I can’t help but touch him. I put my hands on his thigh and smile back.
He looks at my hand, one black eyebrow raised.
“Down, boy. I didn’t come here for that.”
“That’s a damn shame. If you change your mind—”
“I came to talk about my mother.”
“That killed it. Like taking an ice-cold shower after a snowstorm. Why?”
“Ava sent her an invitation to the shower. If you don’t want her there, I’ll tell Ava to tell her not to come.”
“I’m fine with it if you want her there, as long as you don’t go over there by yourself and she doesn’t say anything to upset you.”
“Really? I thought you would be more…” I hold my fingers up and spread them out like an explosion. He grabs my hand, grinning.
“She won’t be in our house. She’ll be in a room full of people if she comes, not alone with you. For appearance’s sake she’ll behave herself and act like the grandmother-to-be.”
“I wish she didn’t have to act.” He sees the frown on my face and kisses my hand.
“We’ve talked about your mother enough. How was your day?”
“It was good. I went to see Isabelle and Conner. Her entire house is baby proof but he still manages to get around all of her proofing. I was tired watching her chase him around.”
“You got a look at what your life is going to be like in a couple of years.”
“Yes, I’m sure when this little one is out I’ll be up for the challenge. With a little assistance from you.”
He turns his lip down, shaking his head. “Not me. That there’s woman’s work.”
“Well that there better become man’s work or I’m going to pull out my big ole clown shoes and land a swift kick to your ass.”
He laughs, and I can’t hold a straight face with my threat. There’s a knock on the door. Nick says come in and Karen pops her head in.
“Your father wants to see you in his office.”
“Tell him I’ll call him back.”
Her eyebrows raise a bit and her lips pucker together. “It wasn’t a request. I don’t want to be the one to deny his demand. It’s about the case you refused to take.”
“What did he say?”
“I don’t want to repeat what he so eloquently said. He’s not happy.”
“Tell him I’ll be there in a minute.”
“I’ll tell him.” She closes the door behind her.
“Why don’t you want to take the case?” I put my hands on his desk and pull up to his desk.
“The both of you are making me rethink the choices I make professionally. This falls into the category of can I sleep at night knowing I helped this person who I wouldn’t leave you alone with for a second?”
“Ah, I see. It’s good to know we are having such a positive effect on you. I’m sure your father won’t think so.”
“Don’t worry about my father.” He gets off the desk. “I’ll be back.”
“Take your time, I’ll go talk to Karen or look around.”
“Stay in here. I don’t want you wondering around by yourself.”