Chapter Twenty-Three #2
She wanted to ask what had happened when he went back inside but a deeper part of her didn’t want to hear the answer.
She lifted her head slightly to look at him but her attention was drawn to her leg.
The touch was so light, she almost didn’t feel it.
Then the large hand curved around her calf.
A small squeeze and a light pat. Her gaze rose to see T’s arm bent back.
It was an awkward position. He gave another small squeeze and she met his eyes in the rearview mirror.
He looked like a stranger in the dim light of the cab.
His lips angled downward, but void of his usual scowl and glare.
He almost looked...soft. Was that even possible?
It was funny how so much could be said without a word ever being spoken.
A gesture so small yet she got it. He lowered his chin, released her leg slowly and looked back at the road.
She stared at him long after he trained his eyes on the road and for what seemed like forever.
It was strange to think that a man she feared would be the one whose reassurance eased her.
She was finally seeing why a girl like Cassie would be with a man like T.
She nestled into Bogs’ body and closed her eyes. The ride could have been five minutes or five hours, she wouldn’t have known the difference.
“Pretty girl.” A soft whisper in her ear.
She pried her eyes open to see the door in the backseat open.
Bogs leaned in cupping her jaw and kissing her softly.
She squinted from her grogginess but scooted to the door.
She made it to the edge of the seat when he scooped her up in his arms. He would get no argument from her.
At this point, she wasn't sure she could or even wanted to walk anywhere.
The door slammed with a sharp bite then another and another.
With her head resting on his shoulder she finally focused on where they were.
She assumed they’d be going to her apartment or his but the large house in front of her proved her wrong.
He walked up the path and she watched the Garrisons porch come into sight.
The door opened quickly and she saw John look down at her. He backed away not saying a word as Bogs passed through the threshold.
“Bogs,” she whispered.
“Shhh...” It was all she got as he made his way up the stairs and down the long hall.
She knew where he was taking her even before he placed her on his bed.
She watched as he carefully took off her shoes then unsnapped her jeans, pulling them down her legs.
There was no passion in his eyes. But there was love when he glanced up.
He reached for the hem of her shirt lifting it over her head and dropping it on the floor.
He did the same with his clothes and walked over to the door closing it.
When he came back, he folded down the cover and slipped inside, tucking her legs underneath. This was what she needed and he knew it. She turned to her side away from him but his hand curved around her hip, urging her to face him.
The curled her hand under her pillow staring in the most beautiful hazel eyes. The only ones she wanted to see right now.
He lifted resting his elbow on the bed and his hand on his ear.
“I still love Cheryl,” he said.
She was caught off guard by his statement and blinked, searching his face. That was the last thing she expected to hear from him. It was completely out of the blue.
“For all that she did to me and didn’t do for me, there’s a part of me that still loves her.
Maybe if she hadn’t changed, I’d feel differently, who knows, but I do love her.
” He must have read her confusion. “And if I could do that then you know all that you feel for your mom, all those memories and that love she gave you and you gave back, there’s no denying or doubting how much you love your mom. ”
Tears trickled down, across the bridge her nose down her cheek and onto the pillow. “I just couldn’t do it.” He became a blurred vision.
He cupped her jaw circling her chin with his thumb. “You keep saying you couldn’t but you’re wrong. You chose not to, Kenzie. And if you need someone to say it, for some kind of unnecessary validation, I’ll do it. You made the right choice for yourself.”
He was right, she had made the choice and had no regrets. She sighed.
“I was never gonna go through with it.”
“No, you weren’t.”
She furrowed her brows. “If you knew I wouldn’t, then why set it up?”
The corner of his lip curved. “Because if I hadn’t, you would have always wondered what if…” His hand circled her jaw, his thumb strummed her cheek. “Now you won’t. You’ll know exactly what you would do.”
“You really didn’t want me to do it?”
He shook his head. “No, I told ya that. And here’s something I didn’t mention, I don’t think your mom would have wanted you to either. Or your dad. Not because Harris didn’t deserve it but because you wouldn’t deserve to live with that weight on your shoulders.”
She pushed off her side, wrapping her arm around his waist and curling into his chest. He shifted back letting her fit next to him before holding her as close as he could get her.
She whispered. “Now what?”
“What do ya mean?”
“Well, what do we do now?”
He chuckled. “That’s a loaded question. You never ask a man who has a beautiful half-naked woman in his bed, ‘what do we do now?’”
She laughed and slapped his chest. “You know what I mean. What happens with us?”
“Same thing what’s been going on, minus the hiding from fancy Italian named thugs and murderous vigilante plots. I’ll stir shit up though and keep you on your toes if you need it. Don’t want you thinking life with me will be boring.”
“I could use a little boring right now.”
“All right, then boring it is. We’ll start our boring existence tomorrow. Dinner and a movie? Sex is optional.”
She giggled. She almost sounded surprised by her own laugh. “Will that be boring too?”
He winked with a smirk. “Not on my worst day.”
She couldn’t imagine sex with Bogs boring, even if he tried, which was not her plan. She leaned up, kissing him and settled back down, resting her chin on chest. “I love you.”
“Love you too, pretty girl.”
****
The shimmering light peeked through the curtains as untangled her legs from his and grabbed his jeans from the floor.
It was just after eight in the morning. He’d let her sleep for as long as she needed.
After the night she had, he figured she had earned it.
He was careful to sneak out of the room without much noise.
He quietly made his way down the hall and the stairs.
He had heard the soft murmur of voices before he crept into the kitchen. Stone was sitting at the kitchen table.
“You guys stay here last night?”
Stone shook his head, sipping at his coffee. “No, just got here about twenty minutes ago. Figured we check on you.”
“Something wrong?”
T settled his mug on the table and leaned back in his chair. “She good?”
Bogs made his coffee and leaned against the island.
He shrugged. He was hoping what he said last night would be enough for her to get through it but he had his doubts.
It would take some time, more healing for a fresh wound.
He didn’t know how long it would take but he did know he’d be there for as long as it took. Kenzie was his end.
“She’s good. Tougher than she looks, she’ll get through this.” It was an honest statement.
He had his back to the doorway when he heard the last step creak. T’s eyes flickered beyond him and he turned to see Kenzie, dressed and standing in the doorway. “Morning.”
She smiled awkwardly. He was set to push off the counter when she walked over to him. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and hugged her into his side. T moved out his chair and got up.
“Fuck, I guess I’ll make breakfast.”
They laughed taking some of the awkward tension from the room.
His brother worked around the kitchen they’d grown up in with Stone helping out and Bogs joining in.
It wouldn’t be the first time they were the first ones up and making breakfast but it was the first with them waiting on a woman. His woman.
Kenzie remained quiet, getting her coffee and sitting at the empty table.
“How ya want your eggs, Kenzie?” T asked. When she didn’t answer Bogs and his brothers turned to see her standing by the table with tears in her eyes.
“I just wanna say that I’m…”
T moved forward to her with Stone grabbing Bogs’ arm. He looked over and Stone lifted his chin to T.
“Unless the words, scrambled, fried or sunny side up come outta your mouth, don’t want to hear it.”
“Uh.” Her shocked eyes widened and met Bogs’. He knew what T was doing. It wasn’t the way he would have handled it but it might just be best coming from T.
T stepped closer getting in her space. She looked up, unsure, but didn’t back away.
“Don’t say you’re sorry or whatever you planned on saying.
Last night is over, it’s done and forgotten.
We’re not gonna rehash shit, we’re not gonna fucking dwell on it, and you’re not gonna second guess it, no man in this room is gonna let you.
We’re also not gonna let what happened fuck with anything of ours, and that includes you. Ya hear me?”
Her gaze flickered to Bogs and he tightened his lips to keep from laughing. T may not be the best with words but he always got his point across. Last night was done and now they moved on.
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Good, now…scrambled, fried or fucking sunny side up?”
Kenzie face transformed into a smile. “Scrambled, please.”
T turned around, moving back to the stove. Bogs caught the smirk on Stone’s face as he went into the fridge. He felt her hand on his back and he looked down. It was going to be okay. She was going to be okay.