Chapter 12
Chapter
Twelve
L iam stared at the bathroom door for a solid five minutes before his brain came back online.
His phone buzzed with a new message, jolting him out of his stupor.
Aran
So how did your wolf take it?
Liam
He didn't really react?
Just grabbed a pair and went to shower.
I spent a couple hundred dollars on sexy underwear…
And I think he's just going to wear them?
Aran
I'm not seeing a problem with that. Sounds like money well spent.
Liam
This didn't go as planned.
Just change them back.
For the sake of his own sanity.
Aran
It's because you ordered the tamest ones they had. I mean, did you not see the pair that looks like a glittery fire hydrant complete with a hose?
The underwear he’d purchased were plenty racy. The thing Kade had picked was completely open in the back. Liam was about to respond that he had no desire to spend money on sparkly dick hoses, but then the shower turned off, and he found himself staring at the door again.
What was he even expecting? For Kade to parade out in nothing but string and a few square inches of sheer fabric?
Not that he wanted that. No. Not at all.
Kade walked out of the bathroom, toweling his hair dry. His worn sweatpants hung low on his hips, but his tank top covered any potential straps that might be peeking out.
“Are you…” Liam’s brain was too scrambled to finish the question.
Kade’s grin was more than a touch wicked. “Only one way to find out.” He hooked a thumb in the waistband of his sweats, pushing them down a fraction of an inch.
There were things Liam was not capable of handling. Seeing Kade in a minuscule scrap of fabric whose entire purpose was to titillate, not cover, was high on that list.
Liam snatched his night clothes off the dresser, sensing Kade’s amusement as he fled to the bathroom.
He really hadn’t thought this through.
That fact was reinforced when, in the morning, Kade hummed contemplatively over the selection in his drawer, holding up several before choosing a silky black pair and taking them into the bathroom to change.
Liam didn’t know which was more distracting: Kade wearing those, or him screwing with Liam and going commando under his jeans. Both options were their own kind of torture, designed to test Liam’s self-control, and he only had himself to blame.
Well, himself and Miles. And Aran. He could always blame Aran.
Once at the shop, it became obvious they weren’t getting anything productive done. Kade was too restless for that. The ripples of discontent that inundated Liam made him feel ready to crawl out of his skin.
Whenever Liam did manage to focus on the book in front of him, he was interrupted by the mental image of Kade strutting around in black silk. And very little of it, at that.
But even if he could have concentrated, it wouldn’t have mattered. They had a dozen books left, the pile pathetically tiny compared to the mountains of discards.
It didn’t help that practicing magic seemed guaranteed to end with him getting fucked. Not being able to jerk off or use magic was bad enough; not being able to read was a Twilight Zone hell created specifically for him.
They were barely an hour into their disastrous attempts at research when the doorbell rang. Kade cringed and stood.
“I’ll get it.”
Liam cocked an eyebrow at him, but didn’t say a word.
When Kade returned, he was holding a package. Liam eyed it suspiciously. It was small; surely it wasn’t another dozen dick-shaped candles.
“Do I want to know?”
“Probably not. It seemed like a great idea last night, but I clearly didn’t think it through.”
There’d been a lot of that going around lately.
Liam’s curiosity got the better of him. “Okay, show me.”
Kade slid the package across the table, not meeting his gaze. “I was planning to offer it to you as dessert after lunch.”
Liam ripped open the tape and peeked inside. His eyebrows climbing, he pulled out a plastic box containing a sucker that was not meant for children. “Are you implying it would be a bad idea for me to suck on something dick-shaped right now?”
Kade groaned. “I did say I hadn’t thought it through.”
Yeah, that was pretty damn apparent. Even Liam’s restraint wouldn’t hold if Kade sucked on this.
He slipped it back into the packaging and stood, walking over to the kitchen cabinets to hide it behind the glasses. Not that he was counting on that to keep him from dwelling on it. If Kade’s new underwear had taught him anything, it was that out of sight was not out of mind.
He glanced at Kade. “Any other nearby ghost towns?”
Kade snorted. “Like, eight.”
Which was how Liam ended up, for the second day in a row, reading in the passenger seat as Kade drove over an hour to visit a different historical ghost town. Though he got through fewer books this time—driving wasn’t helping Kade much.
If this was Kade twenty-four hours before the full moon, they’d never survive tomorrow.
While the ghost town from the day before had been a tourist attraction, the one Kade brought him to today was a world apart. Kade drove up a mountain to get to it. The road was narrow and winding. Liam avoided looking out the window at the plunging drop inches from the wheels of the car, with no barrier between. The ruts and bumps did nothing to help his reading.
When they reached the parking area, there were no other cars. That was a relief. With as twitchy as Kade felt, Liam thought it was best for them to avoid people.
The previous town had been out in the open, surrounded by barren hills. This place was overrun by nature. There were no beautifully preserved buildings here; it was all ruins and remnants, piles of wood and sketchy outlines of foundations with trees growing inside. The structures that still stood were crumbling, some half-collapsed and the rest ready to fall over in the next storm.
Liam would never be an outdoorsy person, but he found he didn’t mind the hike. The air was rich with the scents of the forest and decaying wood, and there were gorgeous sights everywhere he looked.
Ahead of him on the path, Kade turned back to him, an eyebrow raised, and Liam realized he’d been staring at Kade’s ass. Not the wisest life choice, given the fallen trees strewn across the trail.
“Sorry.” He winced.
Kade leered. “Don’t let me stop you from enjoying the view.”
Liam shook his head, and they continued their journey through the forest.
There was no map, but Kade guided him around. The ruins were scattered out here, not clustered together like yesterday. And while there were signs, most were faded, with some utterly illegible.
One of the few buildings that appeared structurally sound was a cabin with a half-legible sign that explained it was the home of the town’s last resident, who’d died about fifty years ago.
“It reminds you how quickly history can fade,” Liam said. “Less than half a century and the forest has already reclaimed so much of what happened here. Another fifty years, and there might only be traces left.”
Gazing over the area filled him with sadness, but also determination. He couldn’t save this town from the inevitable march of ages that stole away parts of their history, but there was knowledge he could preserve for generations to come. He could leave behind something more than ruins that would be consumed by the forests of time.
He looked over and found Kade watching him intently, a low ache coming through their bond. Desire, maybe, but it didn’t feel sexual—at least not entirely.
Kade stepped closer to him, his wolf showing itself in the amber flare in his eyes, and all Liam smelled was that warm, smoky scent. He let it fill his lungs, and Kade did the same, leaning in and inhaling, his presence heating.
They were alone in a forest, and it was giving Kade ideas.
Liam wet his lips and swallowed, the sound loud in the quiet nature surrounding them. His heartbeat kicked up and his breathing accelerated. He forced out a long exhale.
“My plan to make you less horny isn’t working.”
Kade’s hands settled on Liam’s waist and pulled him closer.
“Will shifting help?” Liam’s voice quavered. “You said running helps on the full moon. It’d be safe for you to shift here, right? There’s no one around, no spirits out here.”
“You want to see me shift?” Kade asked in a low rumble.
“If it will help?”
“Honestly?” Kade whispered in Liam’s ear. “At this point, I doubt anything short of fucking you will help.” He inhaled again and let the breath out with a sigh.
Liam shivered, his stomach clenching with desire. That was… not what they were supposed to be doing out here, and if Kade pushed him, Liam might forget why.
Thankfully, Kade took a step back. “There’s a lookout point with a bench farther up the mountain. You could read there while I run.”
Liam nodded and followed Kade.
The view was spectacular, a stunning scene of trees and mountains, but it wasn’t what held Liam’s attention when he sat down.
Kade pulled off his shirt and tossed it onto the bench. Liam’s eyes traced over his chest, following every line of his abs, and Kade smirked, basking in the heat of Liam’s gaze.
Slowly, he popped the button on his jeans.
“You’re going to…” Liam trailed off as Kade unzipped. Because yes, of course Kade was stripping right there while Liam watched, the thrill of it singing in his veins.
Shifters weren’t shy when it came to nudity, but that didn’t prepare Liam for dealing with it in real life.
Kade inched down his jeans, and Liam’s breath hitched. He was unable to tear his eyes away.
Oh, fuck. Kade was wearing the black underwear. If they could be called underwear. They certainly weren’t doing much to contain his half-hard cock. Dear god, why had he thought buying those was a good idea? Did he have some hidden masochistic streak he’d never noticed before?
Kade slid his thumbs under the strings that were, against all odds, holding the fabric up and toyed with them.
Liam’s lungs had forgotten how to function. He wasn’t sure which was worse: Kade shimmying the black silk down, or the moment he finally pushed them off, revealing himself fully.
Liam swallowed. That truly was a beautiful dick.
Kade tossed the slip of silk on top of his clothing and stood there, naked, letting Liam’s gaze roam over every inch of him. And there were a fair amount of inches.
“You…” Liam cleared his throat. “You should… shift. Run. Relieve some of that… energy.”
The smug smile Kade gave him said he knew damn well he wasn’t the only one who needed relief, but he didn’t push it. Instead, he shifted.
Liam gasped as his transformation echoed between them—a tingling pleasure-pain like nothing he’d ever experienced. He’d seen the shift a handful of times, and it never ceased to amaze him, but to feel it? He didn’t have words to do it justice.
Kade stalked forward, coming closer until Liam could stroke a tentative hand over his soft fur.
A rumble reverberated in his chest, startling Liam, though it wasn’t a threatening sound.
“Okay.” He exhaled. “Maybe you should stay a wolf. When you’re in this form, it’s easier to remember the reasons we shouldn’t have sex.”
Kade huffed, like that might not be true for him. In Liam’s mind, he burned with lust, and Liam got the impression his wolf side was less willing to behave.
But Kade shook himself and turned away from Liam, heading out into the forest.
Even with Kade gone, concentrating wasn’t easy, but Liam got some reading done.
An hour later, Kade returned, panting. He was still a tangle of instinct, but the edge had been taken off. His desires were there, but softened by the pleasant haze of exertion.
That didn’t prevent him from dressing slower than he’d stripped though. Sweat glistened on his skin as it cooled in the late autumn air. Liam didn’t even try to look away.
They hiked to Kade’s car, then headed home.
Liam blinked. No. Not home. To the pack house.
By the end of the day, he’d only made it through four books, but he was chalking it up as a win since they hadn’t jumped each other in the skeletal remains of a long-abandoned bank. Or a log cabin. Or on the bench.
They both deserved sainthood for that.
Waking up to Kade’s dick digging into his ass was not new; the untamed presence in his mind, on the other hand, was a first. There was a slow deliberateness to the rhythm of Kade’s hips, not the half-asleep motion it previously had been. This was a purposeful drag—the kind that left zero questions about how pleasurable Kade would make this if they gave in.
But this wasn’t Kade. No, this was all his wolf.
There was a fierce possessiveness to the way Kade’s hands were gripping him, and Liam found it impossible not to rock his hips, to meet that instinctual grind. The moment he did, Kade was on him, rolling him onto his stomach, pinning him to the bed as he rutted against his ass.
Liam moaned. He’d been craving this, though he’d prefer less clothing to be involved.
Kade leaned in, trailing his nose behind Liam’s ear, inhaling deeply. A growl resounded in his chest, and Liam’s eyes threatened to roll back into his head.
This might be what Kade wanted now, but he would regret it after the moon had passed. Liam had to be the responsible one here.
“Kade?”
He got another rumble in reply.
“Kade?” He tried again.
Kade gripped him tighter.
This wasn’t working. Liam reached behind him and threaded his fingers through Kade’s long hair, tugging lightly to get his attention.
Kade scraped his teeth down Liam’s neck and over his bite mark. Pleasure shuddered through Liam, momentarily distracting him from his annoying impulse to do the right thing.
He yanked harder on the strands. “Do you actually want to do this, or is it the moon talking?”
For a second, he doubted he’d gotten through, but then Kade tensed up, and Liam felt him struggling to suppress his wolf.
The minute it took stretched out, but eventually, his human side clawed its way forward.
He flopped off Liam, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Shit. I’m so fucking sorry I keep doing that.”
Liam turned over to lie on his back next to him. “It’s fine. Are you alright?”
“You’re the one who keeps getting mauled. Why are you asking if I’m okay?”
“How many times do I have to tell you I’m fine?”
“I just hate that I keep losing control, especially since this is all me and my wolf’s fault. At least when the spirits possessed me, I could blame it on those evil bastards.”
“Ah. About that… Elijah doesn’t believe we were possessed. He said the decay spirit had hooks in you, but when he captured the lust spirit, it didn’t have any in us. He thinks it was affecting us and feeding off us, but it hadn’t possessed us yet. Maybe it was too weak to do that?”
A tidal wave of Kade’s emotions swept over Liam, and he worried he’d triggered another panic attack, but Kade breathed through it.
“We weren’t possessed?” He sounded as if the wind had been knocked out of him.
“Doesn’t seem like it.”
“That makes this a hell of a lot worse.” Kade let out a bitter huff.
“Still not our fault. We weren’t in control. If we had been, neither of us would have done this.”
A chilly morning breeze gusted through the open windows as they lay in silence. The longer they did, the more Kade’s scent invaded Liam’s senses. It surrounded him, stroked over him, filled him. He could get high off it.
“Do you wear cologne?”
Kade shot him a confused look. “Shifters generally don’t. Those scents are extremely harsh and chemical-y smelling. It’s one of the most annoying things about humans—how they douse themselves with that shit. Walking through the perfume and makeup section of any department store is torture.”
“Then a bodywash or something?” Even as he asked, he knew that wasn’t right. Nothing in Kade’s shower smelled remotely similar to him; Liam had checked. “If you’re not wearing anything, there should be some way to bottle your scent. You smell so good. Like a summer bonfire?”
Kade frowned. “I don’t smell like that. A summer night, yes, but it’s wheat fields under the full moon.”
“No, there’s a smoky note to your scent. I didn’t notice it when we first met, but it’s definitely there.” A thought hit him. “Wait. I read about bonds and scents. What did the book say? That when two shifters bond, their scents combine? Does it work the same with mages and shifters? Is that what this is? Am I smelling me on you ? Do I smell smoky? Is that my fire affinity?”
“You’d have to ask someone else.” Kade’s gruff tone didn’t cover the slink of his distress through Liam’s mind.
Fuck. He’d stepped in that one. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine.”
Right. Because that wasn’t exactly what Liam said whenever he didn’t want people to worry about him.
It seemed better to drop it, so he rolled out of bed, went into the bathroom… and froze, his hand hovering over the light switch.
In the mirror, his tattoos shimmered faintly, visible in the darkened room.
He’d heard of this before, but only after rituals that used a large amount of shifter energy, and he hadn’t used any for days.
Staring at himself, he pulled his shirt over his head. He hadn’t properly examined his tattoos since this had happened. He’d always been decently powerful; his tattoos had begun to creep over his shoulders during his apprenticeship. That had been impressive enough, but now, this hint of a glow showed how much farther they’d spread. A pattern spiraled out from the bite mark and over his right pec, and when he turned, he caught a glimpse of it sweeping across his shoulder blade.
It wasn’t close to Elijah’s, but it was still a significant increase from what he’d had before, and he couldn’t deny that he liked the look.
Why were his tattoos glowing though? That was weird. It had to be the extra energy from the full moon in Kade’s system and, by default, in Liam’s as well.
He hadn’t read anything about this in the books discussing mages transactionally bonded to shifters, but it seemed like something they would have mentioned.
Were Elijah’s tattoos doing the same? And if they were, what did that mean for Liam and Kade?
His experience so far had been lining up with the accounts he’d read. While he had easy access to Kade’s energy, he couldn’t tap into its entirety unless they were touching. He sensed Kade, though not in the all-consuming way Elijah described. But this? This was making him question his assumptions. What he and Kade had was miles apart from what Elijah and Victor had, but things still weren’t adding up.
Was there something in between a true and a transactional bond? Or was this the bond deepening? He’d been feeling more of Kade’s emotions. Perhaps sex was only one method of strengthening the bond. Could using Kade’s energy have the same effect?
He frowned. If that were the case, he shouldn’t use it, as tempting as it was. Kade had said the deeper the bond, the more it could hurt a shifter when it was severed, and Liam would rather not cause Kade pain just because he enjoyed channeling his energy.
Or maybe he was overthinking it and this happened to all mages bonded to shifters. But overthinking was what he did.
He’d ask Elijah at breakfast and go from there.
Not for the first time, he wished there were better records of mage-shifter bonds.
He flipped on the light, and the bright bulbs drowned out his tattoos as he picked up his toothbrush.
When he exited the bathroom, dressed and ready for the day, Kade was lying in bed, giving no indication of moving anytime soon.
“I’m grabbing breakfast. I’ll see you down there?”
He didn’t get a response, but the moment his hand touched the doorknob, he was unceremoniously pressed into the door by a growling Kade.
“…or not?” Liam said.
It took Kade a beat to pull himself together, though ‘together’ still involved keeping Liam pinned against the wood.
“Sorry, but if you leave, I’ll hunt you down and haul you back here. I’m not sure I can stop myself.”
Liam liked the mental image that conjured up more than he should admit.
“I can’t let you out of this room today. The idea alone is driving my wolf feral. It seems willing to not fuck you, though it thinks we’re being stupid about that, but it doesn’t want you outside or around anyone else in exchange.”
“Is this… normal?”
“Newly bonded couples usually spend their first full moon, uh…”
“Screwing like very wolfy bunnies?” Liam supplied.
“Something like that.” Kade chuckled, the gust of his laughter ghosting over Liam’s neck, making him shiver.
“So no research trip to the shop today?”
“Ah. No. I don’t think so.”
Liam sighed. “That’s fine. I just wish you’d given me a heads-up yesterday so I could have brought the remainder of the books and some of my own.”
He only had two with him, and they wouldn’t last long if he had nothing to do but stay in this room.
But if it made things easier on Kade, he’d do it.
His stomach growled, protesting the idea of missing breakfast. “Can you leave, or should I check if Elijah is willing to make deliveries?”
“I’ll bring you whatever you want,” Kade said, his voice rough, and it almost felt like he was talking about more than food.
It took another minute for him to detach himself from Liam. Once Liam was clear of the door, Kade slipped out to get breakfast.
Liam sat on the bed, took out his phone, and pulled up the group chat.
Liam
So…
Bit of a complication.
Kade's wolf doesn't want me to leave the room today.
Aran
Ooh. Sounds like someone is going to have fun.
Liam
Decidedly not.
I only have two books with me.
Aran
You really need to realign your definition of fun.
Elijah
Victor's super unhappy I'm out of our room.
He feels about ready to throw me over his shoulder and carry me back to bed. It's AMAZING. I'm seeing how long it takes him to break.
Aran
THAT'S the kind of fun I'm talking about.
Elijah
But seriously, Victor has forbidden the pack from running in the forest tonight.
It's understandable, but the whole pack's antsy.
Miles
I'm assuming that means it's better if we don't go out there today?
Elijah
Probably. The remaining spirits are small. They can wait another day before we trap them.
At our current pace, we'll get them all by Tuesday or Wednesday, and then we'll focus on figuring out where they came from and how we can destroy them.
Liam
While you guys are at the apartment, can you finish up the books on spirits?
It's the shortest stack on the table.
There are six left.
Aran
I figured you would have gotten through the rest yesterday. What have you been doing?
Liam ignored that comment.
Miles
Um. Speaking of. Another thing I'll regret asking, but…
What's with the package in the cabinet?
Liam winced.
Aran
What package?
There was a pause, and Liam pictured Miles explaining what he’d found to Aran. He waited for the inevitable.
Aran
Oooh. Yeah. What's with the ~package~, Liam? Is that why you couldn't get through the books? Too busy sucking on that delicious hardness Kade has been feeding you?
Yep. There it was. Time for a topic change.
Liam
Hey, Elijah, are your tattoos glowing?
Elijah
Yeah, faintly. I didn't realize they did that.
Liam
Me neither.
Aran
Are you telling me you both are so full of metaphorical shifter dick that your tattoos are glowing even when you aren't using magic?
Elijah
Yep.
Aran
Damn.
Liam
Am I wrong to think that's weird?
I don't remember reading about this.
Maybe I should research it?
Elijah
Ah, sure. You could do that.
I have faith you'll figure it out sooner or later.
Liam nodded at his phone. Yeah, he would. The answer had to be in a book somewhere.
Aran
Can I have this sucker?
Miles
Oh god. Please no? I don't need to see that.
Liam
Yeah, no.
It's not yours.
Aran
Fine. I'll leave it for you. Kade would much rather have you suck it anyway.
We'll take care of the final few books while you two have your hands full dealing with your shifters. And I don't mean that figuratively.
Liam sighed and closed the app. Elijah would be having a lot more fun “dealing with his shifter” than Liam would with Kade.
His gaze landed on the bookshelf. There were only travel photobooks on it—one for virtually every country in the world and a dozen for the US—organized north to south within their continents. The librarian-adjacent part of him approved of that. Most people would have gone with alphabetical, if they’d bothered to organize them at all. Having them by continent was pleasing to him, even if it didn’t provide him with additional reading material.
He wandered over and flipped through a book on Greece, with its glossy photographs of blue-domed churches, ancient ruins, and charming streets, then slid it back onto the shelf. It was beautiful, but not what he was looking for. Hopefully Kade’s willingness to bring him things extended to searching the house for any books lying around. Liam could read on his phone if he had to, but he preferred physical books when he had the option.
Assuming he was able to get any reading done. With as wild as Kade was feeling, it seemed unlikely.
He collapsed onto the bed and stretched his arms up, his hand bumping into something under Kade’s pillow.
Blinking, he pulled out an e-reader.
Well, this was more promising than the bookshelf. He’d known Kade had been dodging the question with that “Do I look like a reader?” answer.
Before he could turn it on, the bedroom door opened.
“Hey. Do you have anything on here I can—”
Plates clattered onto the dresser, and then Kade was pinning him down and yanking the e-reader out of his hand.
“Apparently not,” Liam said. “What do you have on there?”
“Nothing.” Kade reached over and put the e-reader in his nightstand drawer.
“Ah, yes. The classic empty Kindle under the pillow. If I had a dollar for every time I found one of those.”
Kade didn’t seem to be listening. Instead, he stared at Liam, his gaze intense, his eyes flashing. He felt more wolfy than human again. His dick dug into Liam’s hip while his fingers brushed over Liam’s scalp.
“You should grow this out.” The growl behind his words promised things Liam did his best to ignore. “Then I’ll have something to grab onto.”
Liam scoffed. He said that like they’d be doing activities that justified hair grabbing. “You’re overestimating how much my hair can grow in two more weeks.”
That jarred Kade’s human side into taking control, and he jerked back. “Sorry.”
“It’s going to be a long day, isn’t it?” Liam groaned. “And night.”
“Long and hard,” Kade agreed dryly. “Literally.”
This was going to suck.
A voice in his head that sounded like Aran added, And not in the fun way .
Liam mentally resigned himself to a day of sexual frustration with not nearly enough reading material to get him through.