Epilogue
Matt was standing in the kitchen with a baby in his arms when Owen walked through the door. He gave Owen a warm smile. “Hello.”
Owen placed his package on the worktop, and walked over to him. Rosie looked up at him with enormous blue eyes. He grinned. “And hello to you too.”
“She’s been waiting for you.” Matt adjusted Rosie against his chest. She’d grown so much in the last few weeks that it seemed impossible she’d once fitted into the crook of one arm.
“She’s been waiting for Beth to feed her, more like,” Zach said from the doorway.
At the kitchen table, Beth laughed. “Ignore him. She likes Owen.”
“Everyone likes Owen,” Matt said.
Owen raised his eyebrow. “That sounds suspiciously like a compliment. Should I write this date down?”
Matt chuckled. Rosie made a small, indignant noise and grabbed a fistful of his shirt.
Owen laughed. “Apparently she wants her attention back.” He kissed Matt before leaning down to kiss the top of Rosie’s head. “Hello, sweetheart.”
Rosie’s tiny hand caught his finger.
“Well?” Matt demanded. “Do I get to see it?”
He laughed again. “Yes, Oh Impatient One.” He unwrapped the package and leaned it against the side of the wall cabinet.
Matt’s breathing hitched. “Oh. That looks great.”
The large frame had his master’s certificate in the centre, and around it were photos Owen had taken of the awards ceremony. Jeff and Babs, glowing with pride, Matt in his mortar board and gown, Owen grinning in the one photo Jeff had managed to take without chopping his head off.
“I’ll put it up later.” He glanced at Matt. “No news?”
Matt shook his head.
He’d started looking for work, which was proving a less than straightforward task.
His degree was useful, just not in the immediately employable way he’d once hoped.
He’d had interviews, rejections, and so many emails beginning with Unfortunately that he was only now learning to delete without taking them personally.
Owen had never once suggested he was taking too long.
“There’s no rush,” he always said.
Matt had argued with him about that the first few times.
“There is if I don’t want to spend the rest of my life unemployed.”
“You won’t.”
“How do you know?”
“Because you’re irritatingly determined.”
“That’s not a qualification.”
“It should be.”
There were still days when Owen took a step back to survey their life.
Their life.
It had taken a while to get used to that.
It was the ordinary things that still caught Owen by surprise.
Finding his clothes mixed in with Matt’s.
Being the person Matt texted when something funny happened.
Buying groceries together. Arguing over which film to watch.
Knowing that if Matt said he’d be home at six, he meant he would be home at six.
Knowing where he would be tomorrow, and the day after that.
And the day after that.
Matt had changed. He was more certain of himself now. He spoke his mind more readily. He no longer apologised for taking up space in Owen’s life.
What Owen hadn’t expected was what happened behind closed doors.
The first time Matt had taken six of Owen’s ties from the wardrobe, and proceeded to tie him to the bed, Owen had been so surprised he’d stared at him.
Matt had looked almost amused. “Do you have a problem with this?”
“Not remotely.”
That had been the beginning of a discovery neither of them had seen coming.
Matt had always known what Owen wanted. Now he was beginning to understand what he wanted too.
And Owen was more than happy to let him discover it.
Occasionally, Matt caught him gazing at him afterwards with an expression that made him laugh.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“That isn’t your nothing-face.”
Owen smiled. “I was just thinking I may have underestimated you.”
Matt grinned. “I think there’s no may about it.” He cocked his head. “No regrets?”
“None whatsoever.”
He meant every word.
Matt wasn’t too concerned about the lack of people beating down his door, begging him to come and work for them. The truth was, he liked knowing he had a choice. He could find the right job rather than taking the first one offered.
And while he was searching, he’d been helping Owen with the book.
The manuscript was finished now. After months of photographs, notes, memories and arguments over captions, it had finally become the book they’d talked about putting together.
Owen had sent it to three publishers.
Two had asked to see more. One had asked for the complete manuscript. Nothing was guaranteed yet. But Owen was hopeful.
And Matt was so fucking proud of him.
Sometimes, when they were sitting together in the evenings, Owen would open the latest email and read it aloud. Matt would pretend to understand the publishing terminology. Owen would pretend to believe him.
Neither of them cared. The important thing was they were doing it together.
“Callum called earlier,” he told Owen.
“Is he coming over this weekend?”
“That’s why he called, to make sure we’d be here.”
Callum had become one of Matt’s closest friends.
It had taken a little while for them to get there. There’d been an awkward period after everything that had happened, when Callum seemed determined to apologise every time he saw Matt.
Eventually, Matt had told him to stop.
“You’re allowed to be an idiot occasionally.”
Callum had grinned. “Only occasionally?”
“I’ll let you know.”
Now they exchanged messages most days. During his frequent visits, Callum still occasionally gave Owen a look that said he was keeping an eye on him.
Matt found that reassuring.
Eric and Garth had already visited twice, and it became clear from the outset that Owen had more names to add to his fan club list. Matt had missed them when they left.
It was strange how much bigger his life seemed now. Not because there were more people in it, but because he’d stopped keeping pieces of himself in separate boxes.
He had Owen. His parents. Eric and Garth. The people who had become family.
And he had the island. That had become their place.
Whenever they could get away for a weekend, they left the car in Southampton, picked up the bike, and headed for the ferry.
They always stayed at the Sleepy Dormouse. The staff had begun to recognise them. The first time someone greeted them by name, Matt had stared at Owen in surprise.
The second time, he’d smiled.
By the third, it had felt like coming home.
They rode until their backsides hurt, they ate too much, drank wine they didn’t need and fell into bed exhausted. Sometimes they talked until two in the morning.
Sometimes they didn’t talk at all.
The island had changed for both of them.
It was no longer the place where Owen had finally trusted Matt with the parts of himself he’d spent years protecting.
It was where they went when they wanted to remember that they’d chosen each other.
They were still choosing, again and again, every day.
Matt gazed down at Rosie, who had fallen asleep against his chest. “She’s out.”
Owen smiled. “Good.”
“You want to hold her?”
He hesitated. “She looks comfortable where she is.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
Owen carefully took Rosie from him. She stirred, then settled against his chest.
Matt watched him. “You’re good at that.”
“At holding babies?”
“At this.” Owen glanced up and Matt smiled. “Life.”
Owen’s expression grew warm. “I’ve had a lot of practice.”
Matt stepped closer and rested his head against Owen’s shoulder.
“I love you.”
Owen kissed his temple. “I love you too.”
It still did something to Matt every time.
He gazed around the kitchen, taking in the photos on the fridge, the garden waiting for them beyond the hatch…
The man holding a four-month-old baby as though he’d been doing it all his life.
This was home, because this was where Owen was.
Owen stared at Rosie. “Think we’ll ever have one of these?”
Matt went still.
Owen glanced at him. “I’m not asking for an answer now.”
Matt smiled. “Good.”
“I’m just saying…”
“I know.”
Owen’s fingers curled protectively around Rosie’s tiny hand. “There’s a lot of life ahead of us.”
Matt leaned against him. “Yeah.”
The house was beautiful, but it wasn’t finished.
It never would be. There would always be something else to plant, something else to build.
There’ll always be another weekend at the Sleepy Dormouse. Another film. Another morning.
Matt smiled.
A lot of life stretched out before him, and he intended to enjoy it to the full.
With Owen.
Owen leaned in close. “You know what happens this weekend, don’t you?”
Matt frowned. “If I did, I’ve forgotten.”
“We get to turn this house into Santa’s workshop. Which reminds me. The garden centre near Ryde on the island? It has a Christmas display that has to be seen to be believed. I thought we might take Callum home on Sunday, then pop over there to check it out.”
Matt’s thoughts had got stuck on Santa’s workshop.
“Is there something you want to tell me?”
Owen grinned. “Oh, sweetheart, you still have so much to learn about me.”
Matt couldn’t wait.