Chapter 23
Sarah
For the entirety of the plane ride, I was counting down the minutes until I would be home.
I was already dreaming of a warm shower and my comfortable mattress.
My body ached, each limb feeling heavier, and my eyes could barely stay open.
I was exhausted, not having had a real night of sleep on that cave floor.
Luckily, I was able to take a quick shower at the police station before flying home. I desperately needed a hair appointment; my braids were officially at the end of their life after the rain and the hike. While I was still a mess, my feet were bandaged, and at least I was clean.
And home.
I sighed as I stepped onto my front porch.
There were signs of life inside, the light spilling from the windows and cutting through the darkness around me.
I could hear one of my folk albums playing softly.
It had to be Jackie and Will, wanting to give me a real homecoming—or question me relentlessly. It would likely be the latter.
They deserved answers as well, though so did I. Fai and I… we had crossed a line we shouldn’t have. Being together—well, I wouldn’t say it was a mistake, but it left things even more complicated than they already were. He was my ex-husband, we weren’t married anymore for a reason.
That reason, however, was no longer there.
Fai was sober. Not just sober, but the most dedicated to his sobriety I had ever seen him.
I was scared of how the events of the last week would affect him, but for the first time in so long, I trusted him.
I trusted that he wouldn't relapse—that he would get help if he needed it before he turned to the bottle.
With him being sober, our divorce seemed more and more like an unnecessarily drastic step.
Especially with the truth now revealed. He loved me.
He had always loved me. I was furious he had lied all those months ago, but I could also understand it to an extent.
He wasn’t thinking clearly when he made the choice to lie to me; he just wanted to cut me free because he thought he was drowning.
I hated the choice he made to lie—I disagreed with it—but I did understand why he had made it.
The human existence was complicated for that very reason.
We were all humans surrounded by others, all with their own intentions, reasons, thoughts, experiences, and lives.
While we didn’t always agree, and while humans seemed to fight more often than we got along, we were all still human.
We had the capacity for empathy, understanding, and compromise.
So, while I could disagree with someone’s choice, I could still understand it.
I sighed deeply, knowing I needed to face my friends but wary of what to say. I wouldn't lie, but I didn’t have to volunteer information about the night in the cave.
My hand grasped the door handle, the cool metal seeping through my skin as I pushed the door open.
Jackie was sitting in one of my armchairs, her legs tucked up underneath her as she sipped on what I assumed was tea.
She looked up quickly at my entrance, scanning my body, and exhaled in relief.
She was up in a flash, her mug abandoned as she cleared the distance between us, wrapping her arms around me and pulling me into a much-needed hug.
“Sarah,” she sighed, holding me tightly.
Will came in, drawn by the sound of the commotion. I saw him scan me, just as Jackie had, his eyes showing relief when he saw I was okay… relatively okay.
“Let her breathe,” Will urged, pulling Jackie back into his arms. He wrapped them around her, and Jackie melted into his embrace. Watching them, all I could think about was Fai.
I wanted to be held. I wanted to be held by Fai. I wanted him here in our house—home again.
I shook away my thoughts and wandered over to the couch, collapsing into the soft cushions.
Kicking my feet up on the coffee table and leaving the slide-on sandals the officers in Montana had kindly given me on the floor, I gave Jackie and Will their first real view of the damage.
Both Fai’s feet and mine were injured, covered in bruises, cuts, gashes, and blisters.
We had managed to clean and bandage them well, but the white bandages were still shocking to see.
“Shit…” Will murmured, sitting in one of the chairs while Jackie took the other. “What the hell happened out there?”
I took a deep breath and began speaking.
I told them everything from the start to…
well, almost the end. I explained my reservations about Gabriel, my worries regarding his intentions, and the inconsistencies in his behavior and stories.
I talked about the town, the cabin, and the moment Fai climbed through the bathroom window to get me away from Gabriel.
Will got a good laugh hearing about Fai hot-wiring a truck to get us back into town, and I finally finished with our arrival at the police station.
It was nearly two hours later when I finished explaining the most chaotic week of my life. Night had truly fallen; the only light surrounding us now came from a soft lamp on a bookshelf and the fire roaring in the fireplace.
“I can have my security team reach out to the local police to help with the investigation,” Will offered readily.
I waved him off. “They have it more than covered, I promise. In truth, they all seem angrier than I am. This man pretended to be one of them, and they’re an extremely close-knit community.”
“I would still like to reach out myself, for my own peace of mind.”
“Will,” I started, but he raised a hand, his gaze meeting mine with desperation.
“You were hurt, and we have no idea what this man wanted. You’re my best friend. I want you safe. Please, let me help.”
I sighed but nodded. “Fine, but no secrets. Everything you do and everything you learn is shared with me, okay?”
He nodded in agreement. “Deal.”
Jackie was unusually quiet, staring off into the corner. She hadn’t interjected much or asked many follow-up questions, instead letting me talk and explain for the majority of my story. It was unusual for her to stay so silent.
“What?” I finally asked. Her brown eyes snapped to mine.
She bit her lip for a moment while she thought before finally speaking. “The night you were in the woods—you two just hid out in a cave?”
I swallowed but nodded.
“Sarah,” she prodded, “what aren’t you saying?”
Fai had always said Jackie had a knack for seeing into every recess of your soul, finding the pieces you wanted to hide. It seemed he was right.
I sighed and leaned back into the couch cushions. “Look… it’s really not a big deal…”
“Sarah,” she urged.
“We slept together, okay? Emotions were high, and neither of us was thinking clearly.”
Jackie stared at me with wide eyes, and I could see her holding back her anger.
She hadn’t had the best upbringing—her parents never showed her the love she deserved—and it always affected her actions.
In arguments, she didn’t yell. She didn’t fight.
She knew the damage it could do firsthand, but she still felt things so deeply.
Her words were sharp as she never censored herself, but she refused to be cruel.
I watched her work on composing herself, trying to understand her own emotions.
I couldn’t blame her. Things with Fai… they were so complicated.
“Jackie,” Will whispered to her, reaching across the divide between the chairs. It must have stirred something in her, as she stood abruptly and walked out the front door. It closed behind her with a click.
“Is she still angry about Fai?” I asked Will.
He shook his head. “No, she’s just confused. She wants her friend back, but she doesn’t want to see you hurt. I think she is processing it all, trying to reconcile her anger over his actions, the hurt he caused, her love for him… and her love for you.”
“What do you think? About me and Fai?”
Will smiled. Most people wouldn’t recognize it as one, but the slight uplift of his lips and the sparkle in his eyes—I had seen that smile from him throughout our entire friendship.
“I want you to be happy, and I trust you. If you want to try things again with him, I’ll support you fully.
And if he hurts you again, I’ll slash his tires for the rest of time. ”
A laugh spilled from my lips, though I knew he was being completely serious.
I was grateful he would at least stop at slashing Fai’s tires.
I motioned toward where Jackie had fled and followed my slightly emotionally constipated friend out the front door.
She was sitting on the front steps, her blonde hair reflecting the porch light.
She turned when she heard me, her eyes wet with unshed tears.
“Hey,” I murmured, sitting next to her and wrapping my arm around her. “What’s got you so upset?”
She huffed a humorless laugh and rested her head on my shoulder. “You just spent a night in a cave after running away from a madman. My issues are not that important.”
I shook my head. “We don’t compare trauma. We support each other. Now tell me: why does this thing between Fai and me make you sad?”
She looked up, pursing her lips as she tried to hold back the tears.
“I… I’ve missed him,” she whispered. “I’ve missed him so much, and I can’t reconcile that after everything, he could just get sober.
This whole time… this heartbreak, this pain.
It didn’t have to happen. Before… before, I could be angry.
I could be angry because he relapsed. I could be angry because he caused so much pain. ”
She ran her hands through her hair, the frustration radiating off her in waves. “You know… my life was falling apart and the bitch fired me. Do you remember that?”