Chapter 12 Elijah
TWELVE
ELIJAH
I’ve never really lived a “normal” life. Before becoming famous, my siblings and I didn’t have the best childhood. I realized that when my mom became scared of my dad when he was angry.
During the moments of high tension, I would escape to Lily’s place. Just like always, her parents would welcome me with open arms.
The few times I was afraid to sleep at night and wet my bed, she would let me sleep in the spare bedroom. I would wake up in the morning with an enormous stack of pancakes on the kitchen table. Freshly squeezed orange juice and crisp bacon. My all-time favorite meal.
When I went back home, the war would begin. My mom would try to lessen the stress on us, but she never stood a chance against my dad.
Lily’s mom and dad’s unconditional love, which they didn’t need to show me, was tattooed on my brain.
Not only did leaving my best friend hurt, but knowing I hurt her parents made me live with guilt for many years.
I never wanted to disappoint them. I craved to make them proud of me.
And now I won’t ever be able to say I’m sorry.
They died, thinking I hadn’t given a shit about them and everything they had done for me.
I know she wants nothing to do with me. I don’t blame her. But consideration of personal space flies out of the window when I yank her into my arms.
Instantly, I feel like I’ve made it home, a feeling I’ve been chasing since I left.
My soul nearly leaves my body when I feel her give in to the hug I’m forcing upon her.
Is this what entering heaven’s gates is like?
An intense wave of shivers starts in my stomach and rolls up my body as her fingers dig into my back. Tears stream down my neck from her cheek, where it’s squished between where my neck and shoulder meet.
“I’m so sorry, Lily,” I mumble into the top of her head. “I wish I had known. I would have run here.”
The only response she gives me is a sniffle. I pull her closer, as if she might vanish. The tips of her toes barely touch the ground as I grip her hips, needing to feel like she’s real.
“It’s not your fault,” she mumbles into my skin, making it prickle with goose bumps. “I didn’t tell you because I assumed you wouldn’t care. That wasn’t right of me.”
I nod before leaning the side of my head on hers and speaking directly into her ear. “If you’d called, I wouldn’t have even known. They made me change my number.”
“Who?”
I sigh, feeling her tremors starting to relax. “My old team. If they could control when I used the bathroom, they would.”
Pulling away slightly, she grips my forearms. “I’ve seen a lot of what you guys have said about them. No matter how mad I am at you, no one deserves to be treated like shit.”
I smirk. “Is this your way of being nice to me?”
She scoffs with a shy smile. “If you think this is being nice, then that’s pretty sad.”
I’ve never seen something I hate more. Lily’s tears.
With my thumbs, I wipe her lingering teardrops away before bringing them to my lips and sucking on the salty liquid.
In shock, she drops her plump pink mouth open. She stammers before deciding to just stay quiet. I always loved when she just watched me like the whole world around us disappeared.
After a few moments of silence, she whispers, “I don’t think I can talk about my parents tonight. Can we do a rain check on this conversation?”
“Of course, Sweet Cheeks.” The old nickname makes her green eyes widen. I haven’t called her that in so long. “It’s pretty late. You should go back inside and get some beauty sleep.”
“Are you telling me I look tired?” She pouts, hugging her torso as I take a step back.
“The eyes.” I point to my eyeball. “They never lie.”
“You’re going to want to call me Daddy soon,” I announce, barging into the studio.
Beelining for Levi, who has a disgusted look on his face, I smirk down at him.
“Never fucking say that again,” he barks at me and rises to his full height.
“Never say never because I think I just solved all your problems.”
Placing his guitar back on its stand, he raises a brow, giving me his full attention. “Am I finally not an alcoholic? Did my drinking problem magically disappear from your hands alone?”
He’s got me there.
Slumping my shoulders, I hit his. “Can you stop being a smart-ass and listen to me?”
He rolls his eyes. “Get on with it. I’m trying to make music.”
“We all are,” his band and my brother and sister all say in sync.
Sending them all dirty looks, I throw my middle finger up in the air. “What is our biggest concern about going on tour?”
“Stella’s schooling,” Amelia answers from the sound room.
As she adjusts the headphones on her ears, I give her a thumbs-up.
“Let’s just say, I may have found the best teacher that will ever walk this world.” The smug look on my face makes Levi’s face scrunch up. “Before you all attack my intelligence, I know this person very well, and they’re currently on the hunt for a job.”
“Are you forgetting that we know each other’s business? Who is this so-called friend I know you don’t have?”
I want to punch the smug look off Leonidas face.
“Okay, if you know everything about me, what color underwear am I wearing?” Pursing my lips, I wait for his response.
“Navy blue.”
Damn. How the fuck does he know that?
I glare at Amelia as she muffles a laugh behind her fist.
“Yes, but that’s beside the point of you thinking you know all my friends.”
“Seven days out of the week, we’re together, dummy.” He scoffs, twisting a dial connected to Amelia’s microphone.
Not to be dramatic, but I hate when he’s right; it makes me want to shove my face in the wall and scream.
Throwing a ball of scrunched-up paper in the air and catching it, Axel questions, “How did we get here?”
“Blame him.” I point to my annoying brother. “Anyway, I haven’t brought anything up to her yet—out of respect for you, Levi. I’m ninety-nine percent sure she would be an amazing fit for Stella.”
“I trust you. Talk to her and set up a time so I can personally meet her.” Squeezing my shoulder, he joins his bandmates on the couch.
“We need to get this shit done for tomorrow. It releases in three days,” Leonidas calls out over his shoulder. “It’s our last single that will be released before the album comes out.”
“What’s left that we need to do?” Slouching in a chair beside Leonidas, I grab the extra pair of headphones.
“Amelia is finishing up the backup vocals.”
I can’t help but smile as I listen to my sister’s soft voice. When all of us are in the studio, it never fails to remind me why I love making music.
Getting behind the recording mic, I close my eyes and continue speaking our truth, which was buried for years, through our music.