Chapter Thirty-Four
I should have knownthat Harper would be waiting for me.
She springs up from the couch as soon as I enter the room, hopping on the balls of her feet, her eyes wide as saucers. Her thick hair, bound into two pigtails today, bounces against her red blouse with every jump. “Well?”
“Don’t you have classes?” I ask with a laugh, setting my bag down.
“Some things are more important than classes, Lia,” she says solemnly. “Do you realize what today is?”
“Tuesday?”
I don’t understand the question, or the way that she raises her eyebrows—I just stare at her, completely at a loss, until she finally groans and cuts to the chase.
“Details, Lia! You’ve probably slept with him, like, eight more times since Friday!”
Oh. Of course—I should have known this confrontation was coming, but the run-ins with Marko and Marissa were enough to thoroughly distract me from the topic of our text thread.
I should have talked to her sooner… I’ve wanted to. Sort of, at least. But part of me has felt like there’s something magical in keeping it a secret. I’d never lie to her outright—I’ve just… waited a while to tell her more. Savored the knowledge that Friday night was something for us and us alone. I’ve needed that to sustain me, since he was away all weekend—business in the city, he texted me, whatever that means—and we only got a chance to speak briefly after class yesterday before he had to leave for a GODs meeting.
“No,” I reply at last, sighing. “We’ve both been busy, actually. I haven’t seen him since then.”
“You fucked Ryker Pendragon four days ago, you guys haven’t seen each other since, and I still don’t know a single dirty detail?” She brings her hands to her cheeks and forms her lips into a perfect O, eyelashes fluttering in exaggerated horror. “Does our friendship mean nothing to you?”
“Oh, come on,” I protest, taking a seat on the couch. “That’s not fair.”
“You’re the one who’s not being fair! I can’t believe this. I’m, like betrayed.”
Despite her words, though, her eyes are sparkling—and when I smile at her, she’s quick to return it.
“Okay. I gotta breathe,” she mutters, still bouncing in place. “Jesus, I have so many questions. I don’t know where to begin. Actually, that’s a lie—I know exactly where to begin.” She claps her hands together and jumps onto the other end of the couch, then crosses her legs and leans forward. “Was it good?”
The idea of it not being good is so bizarre that I almost laugh. “What—I mean, yeah. Definitely good.”
“Did you get, like, kinda freaky with it? You don’t need to give a play-by-play or anything, but I totally feel like Ryker’s into some hardcore stuff.”
Freaky? She can’t be using that word the way that I’ve always known. “Um. What do you mean, exactly?”
She rocks back and forth impatiently. “I mean, you know! Actually, considering that it’s you, you probably don’t. Right. Okay. Were there any… ropes involved? Gags, blindfolds?” Her eyes sparkle. “Did he choke you?”
I’m at a loss. “We’re still talking about sex, right?”
“Duh! It’s not all just about putting Peg One into Hole Two, you know. You gotta have fun with it.”
I guess ‘fun’ isn’t exactly how I would describe it—but that’s not how I think of the things that Harper just listed, either. “Choking is fun?”
“If you know how to do it right.” She smirks and tosses her hair. “Ask Ryker to show you. I bet he’d be all over something like that. I guess it makes sense that you went more vanilla to start out, though. That’s actually so sweet—I bet he didn’t want to overwhelm you. God. Ryker Pendragon going full missionary… imagine that.”
“Missionary?” I’m completely perplexed and then a sudden realization washes over me that we’re literally talking about this in our common room. “Harper… I don’t want the others to hear?—”
“Never mind. Plus, they aren’t here anyways.” She waves a hand in dismissal. “We’ve got more important stuff to talk about. What do you know about kink culture?”
“Uh—”
“Wait, don’t tell me. You hear ‘kink’ and think of hair.”
She’s exactly right, and I’m sure she can tell by the look on my face.
“Okay,” she says with a laugh, “yeah, I should’ve seen that coming. Well, my darling…” She leans into her usually soft Southern accent, stretching it into an exaggerated drawl that surprises a giggle out of me. “Kink is what we call all the little things that make sex so titillating. And the big things, too,” she adds in her normal voice. “Stuff gets pretty… out there, but let’s start with the basics. Let me think… degradation! That’s a good one.”
“Degradation, like, insulting someone?” Surely not—this has got to be another word with a double meaning, like ‘freaky’ and ‘kink’ and all of that.
“Well, insulting makes it sound a little crass, but yeah, pretty much. He might call you a slut or a plaything, or remind you that you don’t deserve him… which isn’t true, of course,” she adds quickly. “But just saying that sort of thing can be a huge turn-on.”
Okay, so it’s exactly what it sounds like. If she were someone else, I would think she’s just messing with me—but Harper’s as earnest as I’ve ever seen her. “Seriously?”
“You just have to trust me. But you might not be into that—not everyone is. Hell, maybe you want to take it in the opposite direction. Praise kink. Body worship. Though I don’t get the sense that someone like Ryker would be too keen on that kind of stuff.”
There’s no such thing as someone like Ryker. I could tell her that, but why bother? She wouldn’t understand, and there’s no use trying to explain the indescribable, no-words-for-the-connection that hums through the air whenever my eyes meet his.
“Then,” Harper goes on, “you can bring toys into the mix… restraints, whips, dildos, anal beads…”
“Those all sound like weapons.” I wince. “Well, maybe not the last one.”
“Maybe. But it’s all about how you use them. That’s what makes it so hot—the trust element.” She nods along with her own words. “No matter how big of a thrill you get, you’re not scared because you know you’re safe in his hands. Or his cable ties or whatever.” She sighs, resting her chin on one hand. “I really need to meet some of the guys around here. There’s the one GOD, Freddie something?—”
“Ryker’s friend,” I say automatically. “Yeah, I know him.”
“You know him?” She gives me a pointed look. “Well, if you want to put in a good word… he’s built like a dream, and brown eyes make me totally crazy.”
“Well, get this?—”
My phone vibrates. When I check the screen, all my other thoughts drop away.
Ryker: Come over?
“Get what?” Harper prompts.
“Um…” What was I about to tell her? Something about the time Freddie walked in on me curled up in Ryker’s bed. “Nothing. Doesn’t matter.”
“Everything okay?” she checks. “Is that…”
Her eyes flick from my face to my phone and back again, and I swear I can feel a physical shift in the air when she puts two and two together.
“That’s him, isn’t it?”
I nod.
“Well, what are you waiting for? Don’t let me hold you up!” She waves a hand towards the door. “Go on, get out of here!”
She doesn’t need to tell me twice. “I’ll tell you more later,” I promise as I stand up.
“Well, yeah. And I bet there’ll be a bunch more to tell by then, too.” She winks. “Have fun, babe!”
I text him back while I’m waiting for the elevator.
Me: Are you at the house?
Ryker: Crypt
The Crypt? In broad daylight? I guess that area of the castle isn’t used too often, so the chances of him being caught slipping beneath a trapdoor seem pretty slim—still, it’s risky.
But I can’t deny that I’m eager to get back there. Before, I didn’t have time to look at even half the stuff in that time capsule of a museum.
Though I’m not sure if looking at things is what Ryker has in mind.
Harper’s words replay in my mind as I ride the elevator down. That one word that she used… degradation. I’m still not sure that I understand what she finds attractive about something like that, but it is… fascinating, I guess, in a sense. Though not something I’d find attractive. I preferred it when he said something else…
There were those words that passed between us that night, breathless and desperate. I’m yours. I’m yours…
I’m totally blushing. In public. I avoid eye contact with any of the girls chattering in the hall and the common area when I exit the elevator—and once I’m outside, I notice to my relief that Marissa is gone. God—maybe she really was waiting for me to come back to the dorm. That’s creepy. It’s starting to feel like she’s more obsessed with me than she is with Ryker. Wasn’t it enough to knock my name off the Omega Phi list?
Whatever. It doesn’t matter what she thinks, or what she tries to do. Ryker chose me, not her. And if she thinks she can intimidate either of us to the point of changing that, she’s sorely mistaken.
I see him as I approach the rear castle tower. Leaning against it, scrolling idly through his phone. He looks up, seeming to sense my stare—God, will I ever get used to those dark blue eyes?
“Hey.” He tucks his phone away and straightens up, shoulders flexing below his black button-up in a light stretch that makes my breath come more quickly. He’s wearing his tie today—I don’t know if I’ve ever seen it on him before, despite the fact that it’s technically a mandatory part of the uniform. “Figured you could use a distraction. Freddie said that that Marko bastard was giving you shit.”
Oh, great. The last thing I want to do is think about Marko—just the thought of that slimy bastard is enough to diminish the heat that Ryker’s presence ignited within me. “It’s nothing, really. He doesn’t scare me.”
I expect Ryker to approve of that—give me a little nod, maybe—but his expression hardens instead, brows dipping low over his eyes. “You should be careful of him, Lia. He’s more dangerous than you might think.”
“I can take care of myself.”
“I’m not saying you can’t. Just…”
He steps forward, and I automatically do the same, closing the distance between us. The late-afternoon sun catches in his eyelashes as he regards me, his fingers brushing the underside of my chin.
“I don’t want anything to happen to you. And Johann Marko is a royal fuckup of a person. He’ll play dirty to get what he wants. So… just promise you’ll be careful.”
“I will. I promise.”
He gives a small nod, and his lips graze my forehead briefly before he pulls away and starts back towards the tower, guiding me alongside him with a hand at the small of my back.
“Is it safe? To just… walk right in? What if someone sees?”
“They won’t. It’s easy to slip under people’s notice when they aren’t on the lookout. And it’s not like this part of the castle is closed off—just rarely used. See?” He shoulders the door open and ushers me inside. “Not even locked.”
It must be clear by my face that I’m unconvinced because a rare smirk curls his lips when he glances down at me. “Seriously, Lia. You’d be surprised. Sometimes I think it’s easier to get away with things in the daytime than it is at night.”
An image flashes through my mind’s eye—a dark hood, a red candle, a devil’s grinning face.
Greed in the night, blood in daylight.
Unease prickles down my spine.
The smirk evaporates. “If you really don’t want to, we can go back to my room… but if you trust me, I have something to show you.”
“Something more than the torture chamber slash antiquities museum that’s secretly built under our school’s basement?”
“Not exactly… you’ll see.” He bends down and rolls his thumb over the trap door’s padlock, then looks back up at me, waiting, questioning.
Well, why not? It’s not like there’s anyone else in the tower or the adjacent hall.
“Okay. Show me.”
He descends first this time, phone flashlight aloft, leaving me to close the door behind us. Excitement mounts in my chest as I follow him, heightened by a tingle of curiosity. The heat that my conversation with Harper stirred in my cheeks hasn’t quite dissipated, and my body won’t let me forget Ryker’s proximity. Before, I felt an all-consuming allure towards him, something that I couldn’t pin down in any particular way—but now the specific sensations are growing clearer to me—the heightened sensitivity of my nipples against my bra, the gathering of heat between my legs. I miss the feeling of him moving inside of me. I even miss the pain at the edge of my pleasure, just enough of an ache to assure me that it was real, that he and I were as close as two humans can ever be.
As eager as I am to see what he has to show me, I hope it doesn’t take us too long because the physical proximity is beginning to make me a little bit desperate.
“This way,” he says once we reach the bottom of the stairs. “The door’s at the back of the room.”
The door?
“I’m right behind you,” I assure him.
Still, my eyes stray as I follow his lead. The phone light, angled straight ahead, only catches the very edges of some of the display cases, but that alone is intriguing enough; I get a glimpse of a bejeweled silverware set, an elegantly stemmed chalice, and even a multi-tailed whip of reddish leather. Like the iron maiden, I recognize it instantly as a cat o’ nine tails. A classic torture device.
Restraints, Harper said. Whips…
Ryker comes to a halt. As far as I can tell, we’re just facing another brick wall—but from the glint in his eye when he looks back at me, there’s more to it than that.
“Cover your eyes,” he instructs.
Blindfolds…
“Do I have to?”
“Do you want to?”
Yes. Yes, I do. I’m nervous, but a good, fluttery sort of nervous. Relinquishing my trust to him completely isn’t just tempting—it’s almost irresistible.
I lift my hands over my eyes. “Okay… I’m ready.”