Chapter 23
twenty-three
. . .
Ceci
I can’t stop grinning as I walk into the foundation’s conference room.
It’s been there ever since my nap with Aidan a few days ago.
We slept for about six hours; then he cooked me oatmeal and a turkey sandwich, and we played video games until the sun went down.
Then he fed me again, and I invited myself back to his bed, where we slept until morning before he drove me home.
If he didn’t have a game Sunday night, I’m sure we’d still be holed up in his apartment, avoiding the world. I watched his game from my place, and then we played after—from our own places. It’s just like old times, except now we’re doing it with video on, and it feels so fucking nice.
Hailey gives me a smile and a wave, and a pang of guilt hits me as I cross the boardroom to sit beside her. One of these days, she’s going to find out I’m friends with her brother, and she’s going to flip out. I can only hope she approves of our friendship.
“Morning,” she says brightly. “You seem chipper.”
“Just in a good mood.”
“Get laid lately?”
I choke. “What?” That’s not what I expected to hear from her.
The blond rolls her eyes. “You look happy.”
“No, I didn’t get laid,” I say firmly.
Not that I’d be opposed…
“Do you want to?”
I narrow my eyes at my friend. “Hailey MacGregor, are you propositioning me?”
She snickers, unrepentant. “No. But I know someone who would totally be interested in sleeping with you.”
“Who?”
She mimes zipping her lips.
“Hailey, who?” I’m afraid to let myself hope. Did he say something?
When I pin her with my stare, she flinches.
“My brother, okay? I think you should go on a date with my brother.”
“You want me to sleep with your brother,” I correct, ignoring the fact we’ve already slept together. Twice.
“I mean, you’re gorgeous as fuck, and Aidan needs to get back out there. You have enough personality to draw him out of his shell. And fuck, he’s been so grumpy, he could probably stand to get laid. He doesn’t talk about it, but he never goes out. It can’t be healthy.”
“How do you know he’s not seeing someone? Maybe he just doesn’t tell you.”
Hailey shakes her head. “He’s my brother. He tells me everything.”
Somehow, I doubt that.
“I’ve never told my brother or sister about who I was seeing. Not until it became worthy of telling.”
“No, but Aidan and I are different. We tell each other everything. We’re all each other has.” She pauses. “Well, and Ryan too. But after our parents died… He’s my whole world. They both are.”
Exaggerating my reluctance, I heave a sigh. “Fine. I’ll do it.”
She beams. “You will?”
“When and where?”
“He likes this little bistro near our place. Olde Boston Public House? Have you been there?”
I press my lips together. “I’m familiar with it.”
“He’ll meet you there tonight at seven.”
I squint at her. “He already knows about this?”
I can’t believe he wouldn’t tell me he has another blind date coming up. He’s always griping about them. If he’s still interested in going on dates, it’s that much less likely he’ll be interested in spending time with me.
“Well, I still have to talk to him. But don’t worry. He’ll be there.”
Maybe this is what we need. A chance to recalibrate. If he sees me on a date, maybe he’ll finally see me as a woman and not just a gender-neutral humanoid who sometimes shares his bed platonically.
The boardroom door bangs open, and Colt rushes in, his light brown hair askew and white dress shirt rumpled. He hurries into a seat, and Heidi glares at him before calling the meeting to order.
“You okay?” I mutter to him, and his cheeks redden, but he nods.
“Long story,” he replies in an undertone. “Lunch after?”
“Definitely.”
We suffer through the meeting, speaking only when absolutely necessary lest we earn Heidi’s attention—or wrath.
I give a report on the status of the helmet project, we talk through the plans for the upcoming end-of-season gala, and then talk moves on to the outreach campaigns other members are working on.
After what feels like an eternity, but in actuality is only two hours, the meeting wraps up and we’re set free. Hailey has a doctor’s appointment, so she heads across town, and Colt and I decide on the dive bar on Dalton Street with the honey-chipotle cauliflower I’m obsessed with.
“Okay, so what’s your deal?” I ask once we’re seated at the counter and Pablo has brought us drinks. “You’re never late. And never…” I wave my hand at him. He’s usually so put-together. Never rumpled or disheveled.
“I met someone,” Colt announces, then goes beet red.
“Oh? Who is she?”
He swallows loudly. “Uh, he is pretty awesome.”
I do my best to keep my surprise off my face, but I don’t think I’m successful.
In over twenty years of being friends and colleagues, I’ve never known Colt to be queer.
He’s always been associated publicly with women.
Whether he’s finding out a new piece of himself or has simply never shared this part of his life, it’s none of my business.
I grin, trying to convey my sincerity. “That’s great. I’m so happy for you.”
“It’s still really new,” he admits, drawing a circle in the condensation left behind by his water glass. “I’ve never felt like this before. I didn’t know it could be like this.”
“Colt.” I reach for his hand, squeezing it. “That’s fantastic.”
“Yeah, well…” He looks up at me, consternation on his face. “He’s associated with the team.”
My heart stops. “Is he a player?”
If he’s hooking up with Aidan… I don’t know if I could stand it.
“No. Nothing like that.” He blows out a breath. “He’s the assistant equipment manager. And he’s out. But, uh, I’m not.”
“Is he asking you to come out before you’re ready?”
“Nothing like that. I just… I never knew this about myself. I had no clue. And now…” He bites his lip, worrying it with his teeth. “I want to give him the world. But he doesn’t want that.”
“What does he want?”
He lets out a snort. “He says he only wants me.”
“Colt, that’s—”
Amazing. Wonderful. It’s the goal.
But he shakes his head. “It’s a lie. It’s got to be. Guys like him would never be interested in a nerd like me. He’s a jock.”
“Jocks can be nerds too,” I point out. Look at Aidan. Even though he’s a total video game nerd, it doesn’t cancel out that his entire career revolves around being an athlete.
“He’s very much not a nerd,” Colt says, then sighs. “I don’t even know what he sees in me. We’re not… compatible.”
“Do you like him?”
Slowly, he nods.
“Does he like you? Treat you well?”
Again, he nods.
“Then the rest doesn’t matter. Not right now. Maybe it turns out that he really is only interested in a sugar daddy. But maybe he really doesn’t care about your money. That’s kind of the dream, isn’t it?”
He sighs, resting his chin on his fist. “Dreams like that don’t come true for people like us.”
I grimace. “Can’t they, though?”
We’re part of a small club. Not many people have the kind of money we do. And even fewer people aren’t dicks about it. Colt and I, we earned our lifestyle by working our asses off. We didn’t inherit generational wealth; we built it brick by brick, with blood and sweat equity.
Half the time, I feel like a fraud. All I did was build a computer chip. And a company centered around it. All he did was create a video game software that got insanely popular. We used our brains, found an untapped need in the market, and met that need.
But it intimidates people. Those who don’t care about our money are few and far between. I’m extremely privileged to be a billionaire, and I donate a shit ton to charity every year and volunteer my time as much as I can, but it’s still difficult to find people who treat me as an equal.
It’s part of the reason Colt and I get along so well. We’re two sides of the same coin.
“I really hope they do,” he whispers.
“Maybe we can get together for dinner. Introduce me to your man.”
He screws up his face. “We’re not there yet.”
“Oh, so you’re still in the skulking around behind closed doors stage.”
“I’m not ashamed of who I am. I don’t want to hide him. But we aren’t together. We’re just… seeing each other.”
“Hey, I get it.” More than he could ever know. “It can be low-key. The three of us for some video games or Scrabble.”
“You’re not going to tell me to stop seeing him?”
“Why the fuck would I do that?”
He motions between us. “We’re on the board of the team he works for. It’s inappropriate.”
My stomach swirls with guilt. “Hailey just set me up with her brother today. We’re supposed to go out tonight. It can’t be against the rules if she’s doing that. Right?”
Colt pins me with a look. “You? And the hockey captain?”
“Why is that so hard to believe?”
“Babe, you’ll chew him up and spit him out. He’s so… pure.”
I snort. “He is not.”
“He’s a sweetheart. Total good-hearted golden retriever.”
Aidan’s got some grit to him. He just doesn’t show it to other people.
“So maybe it doesn’t work out.” I force myself to shrug. To pretend like I don’t care. “But if it works out… is it really that terrible an idea?”
He pats my hand. “As long as you’re happy. That’s all I care about.”
“It’s the same for you.”
Colt gives me a shy smile. “Who’d have thought? The two computer nerds with the jocks?”
“Speak for yourself. You know I’m a sports nut.”
“Yeah, well, we all have flaws. That’s yours.” He winks.
I throw my napkin at him. “You jerk.”
“You love me,” he taunts.
“Yeah, Colt, I really do.”
The smile slips off his face. “Ceci…”
“Not in that way. You know I’m not hitting on you.”
He swallows, nodding. “We’ve been through some shit together, haven’t we?”
From our days as rivals at MIT, to building tech companies in the same city, to selling our business babies, and now working together on the foundation.
“We have. I wouldn’t trade it.”
“If only it worked out between us.” He sighs, resting his head in his hand. “It would be so much easier.”
“We’re not compatible. Not in that way. And besides, then you wouldn’t have your man.”
“I don’t know that I have him to begin with.”
“Do we need to woo him?”
Colt grimaces. “I don’t want to come on too strong. He says he doesn’t care about my money…”
“Wooing doesn’t have to mean throwing money at him. We’ll come up with something.”
He looks at me, doubt creasing his features.
“Come on. We’re both brilliant. If we can’t think of something, I’ll… I’ll… well, I don’t know what I’ll do, that’s how convinced I am we’ll figure it out.”
“I trust you.” He takes a deep breath, as if he has to convince himself of that. “I don’t want to hide who I am. Or him. I just want to live my life out loud.”
Clapping my hands together, I grin at him. “Let the wooing commence.”