Chapter 18
As dawn's first light began to filter through the curtains, Sadie stirred. For a moment, disorientation gripped her. What the hell? This was her bed, these were her sheets. But everything was wrong.
Then memory flooded back - the electricity, the mind-blowing orgasms, falling asleep in Saul's arms.
Panic clawed at her throat. She'd let her guard down, allowed herself to be vulnerable.
Stupid, so stupid.
She needed to get up, now, before…
"Good morning," Saul's sleep-roughened voice rumbled against her ear.
Sadie tensed, ready to bolt, but Saul's arms tightened fractionally around her. Not restraining, just... reassuring.
"Easy," he murmured. “It’s okay. Take a breath."
To her surprise, Sadie found herself obeying, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Some of the tension eased from her muscles, though she remained acutely aware of Saul's body pressed against hers.
"That's it," Saul said softly. "You're safe here. No need to run."
Sadie wanted to argue, to insist that she always needed to run. It was how she survived. But the words stuck in her throat. Because for the first time in longer than she could remember, she actually felt... safe. Like maybe it would be okay to just be for a while.
Although she was somewhat uneasy at how well he could read her.
"I..." she began, then faltered. What could she possibly say?
Saul's hand stroked soothingly down her back. "You don't have to say anything. Just breathe."
They lay like that for several long moments, Sadie's breath gradually slowing to match Saul's steady rhythm. The panic receded, leaving her feeling oddly calm.
"I don't usually do this," she finally managed to say.
"I know," Saul replied, a hint of amusement in his voice. "Neither do I, actually."
Sadie twisted in his arms to look up at him, surprised. "You don't?" Sadie asked, unable to hide her disbelief.
Saul shook his head, a wry smile tugging at his lips. “I’m not sure why you’re so shocked. I know you’re aware of my reputation. Either way, I'm not in the habit of cuddling all night with my play partners. You're... different."
Sadie felt a flutter in her chest at his words, quickly followed by a surge of anxiety. Different was dangerous. Different meant letting her guard down, opening herself up to pain.
As if sensing her internal struggle, Saul's hand came up to cup her cheek.
"Hey," he said softly. "I'm not asking for anything you're not ready to give.
We can take this as slow as you need. But I think we can both agree that last night was an eye-opener for both of us. Something we should… explore."
Sadie searched his face, looking for any sign of deception. But all she saw was sincerity and a warmth that made her breath catch.
"I don't know if I can do this," she whispered, hating how vulnerable she sounded.
Saul's thumb stroked gently across her cheekbone. "That's okay. We'll figure it out together. No pressure, no expectations. Just... see where it goes?"
Sadie hesitated, every instinct rebelling and telling her to run.
To protect herself. “I assume you mean in the short time you’ll be here on the island?
” she said instead. She could handle that, couldn’t she?
Against every expectation, Saul had managed to meet her needs, and all without going to the usual lengths she went to to find that elusive internal peace.
It might be nice to explore this new dimension.
After all, she was stuck with him until he was healed enough to do…
whatever it was he planned to do. And it wasn’t like he would be here indefinitely.
They were talking days, not even weeks. She could handle that.
Saul shrugged. “I don’t know how long that will be.” The answer was kind of evasive, but Sadie couldn’t deny the truth of it. “But sure, let’s start there.”
She frowned. What did that mean? Did he expect more? Did he want this to continue past his self-imposed exile here on Elysium?
Sadie bit her lip, torn between excitement and trepidation. The thought of having more time with Saul was thrilling, but it also terrified her. The longer he stayed, the greater the risk of getting attached. Or getting hurt.
No. She shook her head to clear her thoughts.
That was ridiculous. He was a billionaire who enjoyed a certain lifestyle.
No matter how compromised he was because of the ‘secret’ life he also led, Sadie had absolutely no doubt he’d go back to that sooner or later.
Saul was both handsome and rich. He could take his pick of women.
At best, she was a temporary distraction, and his only choice right now was whether to pursue it or not, since there were no other options available to him.
And she was fine with that.
"What are you thinking?" Saul asked softly, his fingers tracing gentle patterns on her skin.
Sadie took a deep breath. "I'm thinking... this is unexpected," she admitted, prepared to be as honest as she was comfortable with. "But also... I’m a little curious to see where this could go."
A slow smile spread across Saul's face. Damn, he was handsome. Classically so, in that George Clooney/Pierce Brosnan kind of way. Her very own James Bond.
“That's all I'm asking for. A chance." He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. The tender gesture caught Sadie off guard, making her heart skip a beat. It was so different from the rough passion of the night before, yet somehow just as intense.
"How about some breakfast?" Saul suggested, his voice still husky with sleep. "I make a mean omelet."
Sadie hesitated. Breakfast felt... domestic. Intimate in a way that went beyond sex. But her stomach chose that moment to growl loudly, betraying her hunger.
Saul chuckled. "I'll take that as a yes," he said, pressing one more quick kiss to her lips before sliding out of bed.
Sadie watched as he stretched, admiring the play of muscles beneath his skin.
There was no denying Saul was an attractive man.
But it was more than that. There was something about him that drew her in, made her want to lower her defenses despite every instinct screaming at her to maintain her distance.
Don’t be ridiculous, she told herself. She’d been feeding him all week. Both of them needed to eat. There was nothing more to it than that. A physiological necessity.
"You coming?" Saul asked, holding out a hand to her.
Throwing caution to the wind, Sadie pinned him with a saucy look. “Not yet,” she replied, cheekily, and probably in a manner that would have all her friends raising an eyebrow.
She winked. “But I’m sure you can take care of that after breakfast.”