Chapter 24
Nine Years Old
“Ethan, what are you doing here?” I’m sitting on the concrete wall in front of my class. I’ve been sitting here since the boy in my class pushed me down, and I couldn’t stop crying.
“Mom found out what happened and asked the counselor to let me sit with you for a bit. You ok?” He sits next to me and drapes his arm over my shoulders.
I can’t stop the new stream of tears that roll down my cheeks. “I don’t know why Michael is so mean to me,” I choke out.
“I’m sorry, Kat. Do you want me to talk to him?”
“NO!” I shout.
“Ok, ok. I won’t talk to him. What can I do?” He runs his hand along my hair, and I lean into him.
“I don’t know.”
“Are you hurt? Do you want me to walk you to the nurse’s office?”
“Will that be ok? I don’t want you to get into trouble. I scraped my knee, and it really hurts.” I point down to the scrape that’s still bleeding a little.
“Yeah, my teacher said I could come out here until you were ok to go back to class. I’ll walk with you there. But then, I probably need to get back.”
“Thanks for being here for me.”
“Always, sis.”
Ethan helps me walk to the nurse’s office and tells her where I’m hurt. Once the nurse calls me into her small exam room, I watch as Ethan walks out of the waiting area to go back to his class. I’m so glad he takes care of me when I need him.
I don’t know what I’ll do when he isn’t at the same school next year. Thankfully, I don’t cry at school very often.
***
Present Day
The next morning, Liv picks me up, and we head back to Columbia. As we drive home, she tells me about her week at her parents’ house, and I tell her about mine.
I tell her about my time with Sam, omitting the part about me coming on his fingers. I know she would be excited, but I’m not ready to delve into what this means yet.
I want him. That fact is clear.
But he lives in Chicago, and I live in Columbia. We see each other less than a handful of times a year; I’m not sure how that would work out for either of us. Even when I move back to Charleston, it’ll still be hard.
So, instead of delving into my evening escapade with Sam, I broach another subject I’m scared to talk to her about. “Liv?”
“Yeah, babe?”
“I need to talk to you about something.”
She glances at me before responding, “Why do you sound… I don’t know… off? What’s wrong?”
“I’m just, I don’t want you to be disappointed.” I frown at her.
“You’re my best friend and a badass lawyer. Just say it!” She gives me a wide smile before quickly turning her focus back on the road.
The laugh that escapes my lips is automatic. “I’ve been thinking for a while about moving back to Charleston. Truthfully, I had planned on talking to you about all of this before Ethan died. But then everything happened, and I just didn’t know how to bring it up.”
“Kat.” She takes my hand and looks at me meaningfully. “You know I always want you to follow your heart. I’ll miss you desperately, but if Charleston is where your heart is? You should definitely go.”
I smile and look out the window. “I talked to my parents, and it turns out that they never sold Ethan’s place, and it’s paid off. They said I could live there, which means I can afford to keep paying half of our place.”
“Oh my God, woman! Is this why you were nervous to tell me?”
“A little,” I say sheepishly.
She gives me this look that tells me something is up her sleeve. “It’s actually good timing because Talia and I have been talking about moving in together. Her lease is up in January, so I was going to talk to you about her moving in with us.”
“That’s great, Liv! Yes, she can definitely move in!” I’m genuinely excited about this next step in Liv and Talia’s relationship. Especially with some of the turmoil they’ve been navigating with Talia’s family.
“So,” her tone loses its prior excitement, “when are you thinking about moving back to Charleston?” Her mouth is drawn downwards in a slight frown, and she slumps into her seat. I know she’ll miss seeing me every day just as much as I’ll miss her.
“I think I’ll give notice at work in December and then have my last day be around mid-January.
I know it's more notice than anyone needs to give.” I shrug and fiddle with my fingers in my lap.
“I want to give them as much time as I can so they can work out the transition and possibly find my replacement. That should also give me enough time to wrap some things up.”
“You’re gonna move into Ethan’s place?”
“I guess so. It’ll be better than living with my parents.
” I grimace at the thought of navigating whatever is going on between Sam and me with my parents always around.
“I think it might be a little weird.” I sigh audibly.
“You know, they kept all his furniture and clothes. I don’t know if I can move into his place with all his stuff still there.
And you want to know what’s even weirder? ”
She looks at me, raising an eyebrow, and nods her head for me to continue.
“Well, I decided to work at my dad’s firm.” I scrunch up my face in mock disgust.
Liv just laughs.
Fucking. Laughs.
Playfully, I push her arm. “Shut up. I hate you.”
“Bitch, you fucking love me.” She flips her hair over her shoulder in jest. I smile at her dramatic nature.
“I do love you. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you being at my beck and call. What am I going to do without your sass? Who's gonna make me blueberry waffles when I’m sad? Or watch Gilmore Girls reruns with me?”
“You really are going to be helpless without me. Good luck with that.” Her laugh is contagious.