CHAPTER 13
“Ithink I’ll stay here,” I tell Evie as she puts lip gloss on in front of the vanity mirror in her bathroom. “I’m tired after everything we’ve done today.” I’d love nothing more than to go back to Bennett’s rock and relax without any pressure besides soaking in the peaceful beauty.
Evie’s dressed in leather skinny jeans, a sparkly silver tank top, and black strappy sandals. I’m still in my denim shorts and t-shirt.
Evie points her lip gloss wand at me. “You and Cam are paying for drinks. You have to go.”
That was a stupid bet I made. How expensive will one round of drinks be for people who aren’t used to pinching pennies? I have my credit card with me, but I try not to use it. Whenever I do, this antsy feeling makes it so I can’t breathe properly until I’ve paid in full. I don’t like owing anyone anything, not even a bank. I can take care of myself.
My checking account doesn’t have a lot in it and with my car insurance due next month, I can’t afford to waste a single cent. My stomach turns. I hold a hand to my belly. I’m not sure how I’ll swing these drinks, but a bet is a bet. “Fine. I’ll go.” But I won’t enjoy it. I’m too wound up and worried. Which sucks because I’m already freaking out about the night out. Will I be able to stay away from the allure of flirting? Can I keep my ban going strong?
“Go get dressed.”
I salute her. “Yes, ma’am.”
“I’m not old enough to be a ma’am.”
“The teen at Scoops thought you were.” I smirk.
She picks up a comb and throws it at me. “He was being polite.”
“Was he? I thought I saw a few gray hairs around your temples the other day. Maybe he’s right.”
Evie laughs. “Liar. But if I did, I’d own those grays. It means I earned them.”
I laugh too because she’s right. Evie’s the type of person who’d make having gray hair popular. And I love that she accepts who she is exactly as she is.
The bar is pleasantly nice. When we drove past the brown building when we first got to Stokesley, I pictured the interior being worn and dirty. I’m glad I was wrong. Smack dab in the center of the dining room is a giant square bar with seating around all four sides. Wood planks are on the lower half of the walls. The top halves are painted forest green and covered in photos, fishing and boating gear, and dart boards at the back. The lights are dim and “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi is playing loudly through hidden speakers.
I follow Evie, who’s following Henry. He leads us to an empty back corner booth, next to a hallway that leads to the bathroom. A dart board is to our right, along with a billiards table. Evie scoots to the middle. I slide in beside her, and Emerson takes the seat next to me.
Good. Being trapped on both sides means getting up is harder. I’ll sit here, sipping on a free water and chatting with Evie’s family. I’m safe from breaking my rules and hopefully with Cam splitting the cost of drinks, I won’t have to sell my kidney on the black market.
Cam and Henry take seats next to Evie. A waitress stops by, dropping off a menu. Browsing the options listed, I’m praying the others choose cheap drinks. They also serve food that, based on the photos, looks good, but is way overpriced. Fifteen dollars for a Caesar salad with no meat? Hard pass.
“I’ll put the first round on my tab,” Cam says, looking at the menu. “Mils, you can pay me back later.”
Later, like when I have a job? Or later, as in when we get home? “Okay.” I remind myself to work that out with him tomorrow. I don’t care for Evie’s family to know how broke I am. “What are you getting?” I ask Evie.
“Not sure yet. You?”
I shrug. “Most likely just water.”
Leaning toward me, Evie whispers, “I can cover for you, Mils. Order whatever you want.”
I shake my head. “It’s not that.” Entirely. “I haven’t been out since I vowed to stay away from guys. I really just want to take tonight easy, you know?”
She squeezes my thigh. “I’m really proud of you.”
I blink back sudden tears. My parents never told me they were proud of me. Nothing I ever did was good enough for them to notice, regardless of how hard I tried. Having my best friend say it means the world to me. She’s been supportive of me working on myself. I have no clue how or when I’ll determine I’m ready to try dating again. But until I have some sort of epiphany, the opposite sex and I are on a friends-only basis.
The waitress comes back, and we all order our drinks. We chat for a bit until the billiards table closest to us opens up. Emerson scrambles out of the booth. “I’m ready for some pool. Anyone want to play me?”
“I’m game,” Henry says.
For all the time Evs and I have spent in bars, I still can’t figure out how to hold a cue stick and hit the ball as hard as I want. “Cam, do you want to play darts?” I ask.
“Twenty bucks, Mils wins,” Evie bets.
Cam grins cockily at his sister. “Deal.”
Can these two do anything without making it a competition? We stand and Camden gets the darts from a metal cup bracketed to the wall. He hands me the blue darts, keeping the red for himself. “When was the last time you played 501?”
“It’s been a while.”
“I’m looking forward to winning Evie’s money.”
We had a dartboard in our garage growing up. I played a lot as a teen to escape being inside the house where my parents were. My skills might be a tad rusty, but once I find my groove, I’m confident he’ll be forking over money and not Evie. “I’m sure you are.”
Cam throws his first dart. It lands on the circle next to the bullseye.
I nod. “Alright, alright. Not bad.”
“You’re going to have to do better than that to win Cam,” Evie says.
I smile at my best friend who has seen me play this game dozens of times since our friendship started five years ago.
“Let me see what you’ve got, Mils,” Cam says, stepping to the side, giving me room to set up.
I put my right foot slightly forward, square my hips to the board, and raise my hand to the exact height of the bullseye. Taking in a deep breath, I exhale and release my dart at the same time. It thuds as it hits the board just shy of the little red circle in the middle. Triple points will work, but I was aiming for the center.
Close, but not good enough.
“Ooooh,” Cam hoots. “I see you’re not playing around.”
“I’m not.” I mean that for more than this game as well. I’m serious in my determination to learn from my past mistakes. So far, this night has been exactly what I needed. Evie’s family, no men, no bad decisions on my part. Just having fun.
Evie loses interest in our game and goes to the billiards table to hang out with Henry and Emerson. Cam and I keep playing, our scores dropping as we fight to be the first to reach zero.
Out of nowhere, Cam asks, “What did you and Bennett do last night?”
“Oh.” I blink, surprised at the turn in conversation. “We bumped into each other in the kitchen, then he took me to the rock.”
Cam’s eyes are as wide as the dartboard. “He showed you his rock?”
He sounds just as shocked as Evie did. And why do these siblings make it sound like a euphemism for something else? “Yeah…”
Cam rubs the back of his neck. “Maybe he is ready to move on. When Evie was pushing it yesterday, I didn’t think he was ready. But… I don’t know. As hard as this is to say, Evie might be right.” Cam smiles and the relief in his eyes tells me how worried he’s been for his cousin.
But I’m confused how Bennett showing me his favorite place in the backyard means he’s ready to move on from his late wife. “I’m glad you can admit when you’re wrong. But can you explain how this event correlates with me?”
Cam throws another dart before answering. “We’re not allowed to go there unless we ask his permission first. It’s his rock.”
“How does a person stake a claim on a rock?” Didn’t he say his grandfather built and carried those wooden chairs to the rock for his grandma? Wouldn’t that make it their spot and not Bennett’s?
“Ever since my grandma declared the walk too much for her knees, Bennett has said that only he could go there unless we ask his permission. We all agreed because the rest of us aren’t ones to sit in silence for hours on end like Bennett. And we were teens at the time who cared more about having fun than a boulder. But the only other person he’s ever taken there was his wife, Jen.”
A million thoughts are swirling in my head. What exactly is Cam implying? I ask the most pressing question. “So you think because he took me to the place he likes to meditate that it has some deeper meaning other than him showing me around the property?”
Cam holds his hands up defensively. “I’m not saying he’s into you or anything like that.”
Right. Because Bennett is a stand-up guy and those types aren’t into me. Thanks for the reminder, Cam.
He continues, “What I’m saying is that him taking you there means he’s opening up more.”
According to Evie, Bennett’s been pretty tormented and grief-stricken. “I hope it means what you think it does.” I didn’t do anything except say yes to seeing an amazing place that Bennett said I could visit any time I wanted. If me agreeing to go where Bennett wants helps him somehow, I’ll keep doing it. But Cam and Evie are reading into this more than they should be.
Because my heart cannot handle the disappointment of crushing on Bennett and him not reciprocating, it’s best I don’t go there at all.
Cam’s smile turns mischievous. “Not gonna lie. If Bennett is ready to date again, I wouldn’t hate it if he went out with you.”
I’m flattered. But does he honestly think Bennett would fall for me? My jaw drops. “What?!?” My voice comes out high and screechy. Is he crazy?
“No pressure.” He laughs.
More like no chance. Bennett wanting to date me? Puh-lease.