CHAPTER 15
“Are we swimming?” I ask Evie, who once again barged in on my yoga routine. It’s not that warm out and after the freezing water from my initiation jump, I’m not inclined to do it again.
“Nope.” She gets off my bed. “We’re cruising around the lake, but that’s it. Wear whatever you’ll be warm and comfortable in.”
“What are you wearing?” I’ve never cruised around a lake before.
“Jeans and a t-shirt. I might take a light sweater in case the wind picks up.”
That’s an outfit I can handle. “Perfect. Let me get changed and I’ll meet you—” I’m still not one hundred percent oriented with this mansion—“in your room so we can get breakfast.”
She gives me a knowing smile. “See you in a bit.”
Evie hands me a few towels, “Just in case” from the cabinet by the hot tub outside, grabs a few herself, then leads the way down a stone path to the water.
The large white boat with a navy blue bottom I saw in the boat house yesterday is waiting at the end of the dock. Maroon 5 blares from the speakers. My legs get a little wobbly as we approach. I’ve never been on a boat before. Will I get motion sickness?
“Welcome aboard Betty the Boat,” Emerson greets me, holding out a hand to help me climb aboard.
I place my palm in his—curiously, his touch doesn’t make heat zip through me like Bennett’s did, but it doesn’t matter because Bennett’s a friend—and step into the boat. The back dips a little and I tighten my fingers around Emerson’s. “Betty the Boat?” I joke, attempting to hide my nerves.
He glides a hand along the edge. “She’s a beauty and reliable to boot.”
I know nothing about boats. If he’s saying she’s reliable to ease my nerves, I appreciate it. But he also could have said they’d owned it for thirty years and weren’t sure if we’d make it home safe and I’d still sit my butt down across from Camden, right behind the windshield. There’s no way I’m missing out on this experience, regardless of my skittering pulse.
Evie unties the boat, jumps in, and goes straight to the front with Henry and Bennett.
My eyes find the man I’m trying—and failing—not to think about. Bennett’s wearing jeans and a black t-shirt. A simple, classic look for any man. On Bennett? In a boat with his arm draped casually across the back of the seat with sunglasses on?
Drool. Worthy.
One minute into seeing him for the day and I’m already going back on my word. I have zero self-control.
“Are we ready to par-tay?” Camden sings.
Emerson hollers back, pumping a fist in the air. “Yeah, baby! Let’s do this!”
I shove my shaky hands under my legs, staring straight ahead. Emerson stands between Camden and me, holding on to the top edge of the windshield. Camden eases the boat away from the dock. My heart pounds violently. Take deep breaths. This will be fun.
“Where exactly are we headed?” I shout over the loud music.
Emerson skates his finger in the air, tracing an outline of an unfamiliar shape. “Around the lake. You’ll get a good feel for where things are and how to find our place if you decide to take a paddleboard or kayak out on your own.”
“I’ve never been paddleboarding. Is it fun?” Kayaking with Bennett was a blast. He even named me first mate at the end.
Emerson whips his gaze to me, his eyes wide. “Seriously?”
I shrug like it’s not a big deal how boring my life is. “We didn’t do recreational activities growing up and I’ve been too busy with school to go as an adult.”
Camden leans around Emerson and says, “Evs should have brought you here sooner.”
I pick at my fingernail. “I’ve worked every summer.” It’s a miracle I’m here this year.
“Then it will be our pleasure to make sure this summer is full of firsts for you,” Camden says with a wink.
I smile back. “I accept. Although…” Evie never answered my question about jobs. Maybe these two might have a lead for me. “I need to find a job while I’m here. Know of anyone hiring?”
Cam shakes his head.
Emerson frowns. “I don’t. But you can check at the bar tonight when we go out.”
I asked last night, and they said they weren’t hiring. “Thanks for the tip.”
Camden hoots. “Millie’s coming out again with us tonight!”
I’m not sure why they’re so excited. After my dart game with Cam last night, I sat in the booth while they flitted from person to person, flirting with almost everyone there. The only reason I’m going tonight is to pretend to ask about a job. I’m not sure why, but I don’t want to tell them that everyone has turned me down so far. They say it’s because they’re fully staffed, but I’m starting to wonder if it’s me.
Evie cheers. “Yes! I hope Eric is there this time so you can meet him. I’m texting him right now.” She pulls her phone from her back pocket. Her fingers fly across the screen.
I groan, not ready to meet this guy. “I think I’ll be too busy beating Cam at darts again. Sorry, babe. I’ll have to meet him another time.” Or never. He’ll be out of her life in a few days. Weeks at the most.
“I’ll take you on a second time, Mils,” Cam says. “Want to place a bet?”
I shake my head. “I don’t have anything to give you.”
Cam winks. “You might. You’re just not thinking outside the box.”
Evie commands Emerson, “Trade places with me so Millie and I can chat.”
Emerson shifts behind my seat, giving Evie room to join me. I scooch as close to the edge as I can, giving her space on the chair. Our legs squish together. Emerson moves up front with his brothers, slapping their legs as he goes.
I’m glad I have my sunglasses and Evie told me to wear my hair in a braid. The wind is fierce as Cam guides the boat around Lake Lloyd. The view is just as stunning as yesterday, with the pine trees surrounding the area and the sun shining on the dark blue waves.
“I’m sorry if me saying I’ll introduce you to Eric upset you,” Evie apologizes. “I promise I don’t need you as a wing woman or to hang out with one of his friends. But I would like you to enjoy your time here.”
I lower my voice. “You know how I get when I’m at a party. I’m worried about myself, not you or Eric.” Last night was fine since I stayed in the booth. But if I’m pulled into a group setting, it’s like I have this need to put on a show. To be this fun, vibrant version of myself who wants everyone to like her, so I do whatever I can to endear myself to others. It’s how I catch the attention of the losers at the bar looking for a good time and nothing more.
Evie wraps an arm around my shoulders and squeezes. “One day, you’ll find the right man for you. One who will cherish how amazing you are instead of using you as his entertainment until he gets bored.”
“Just don’t let me drink anything or flirt. If I stick to you and your family like I did last night, I should be fine.” I’d kept to myself the last six months. The longest time I’ve gone without dating and it’s helped. I understand why I crave attention from men (thanks to my psychology class and no thanks to my parents). Because I never got positive attention from Mom or Dad, I seek any guy who will shower me with compliments or pay me an ounce of attention. As soon as they do, I jump to the white picket fence dream because I’m so desperate for someone to love me. The problem is, I don’t know how to fix falling for guys right off the bat.
I know what my issue is; resolving said trauma is a whole other story I’ve yet to figure out except by staying away from men altogether. But I don’t want to be alone the rest of my life. Somehow, I have to figure this out.
“I’ve got your back, Mils. You’ll have fun without any side effects.”
“Thank you. You’re the best.” I squeeze her back, hoping she understands how much I mean it.
“Come on.” Evie pulls me up with her. “You should come sit up front. It’s the best feeling in the world. Almost like Jack and Rose in Titanic.”
“At last my dreams are coming true!” I laugh. “Will you be my Jack and stand behind
me?”
“I’ll make Bennett do it since he has long arms.” She winks. “Cam, we need the ‘I’m Flying’ soundtrack on.”
“Yes!” Cam laughs.
Wait… they have the music from Titanic? Is this some joke? Another initiation?
“What do you want me to do?” Bennett asks, his expression cautious as Evie and I come up to the front. He rubs at his bare left ring finger.
“Be the Jack to Millie’s Rose.”
“Oh, yeah.” He nods. “Sure.”
Emerson and Henry move to the back of the boat, leaving the front to Bennett, Evie, and me.
Bennett slides over, the front V-cushion now open for me. He gestures for me to come forward. “Kneel here and put your arms on the railing.”
My gaze darts from Bennett to Evie, back to Bennett. “I was joking.” My voice comes out high-pitched. “I don’t need to do this.”
Bennett shouts at Camden, “Don’t turn for a minute.”
Cam salutes Bennett. “You got it.”
Are we really doing this?
“Come on, Mils,” Evie prods. “We’ve all done it. It’s really fun.”
If I didn’t know Evie as well as I do, hundreds of red flags would fly like the crazy people during the Running of the Bulls in Spain.
I’m nervous about Bennett being close to me. What if I do something embarrassing? Why did Evie suggest Bennett and not Emerson or Henry? Does she know I’m fighting my attraction to him?
“Tick-tock.” Emerson taps his wrist. “Eventually, we’ll have to turn the boat. It’s easier to do this now.”
Goodness. These people are pushy. Who knew this moment was so important? “Alright.” I cave to the peer pressure. “I’ll do it. You guys make me nervous because of how excited you are about it. I wasn’t sure if this was another jump in the lake thing or not.”
“This is about having fun, nothing else,” Evie says.
Risking a glance at Bennett’s face, I see my reflection in his sunglasses.
He smiles reassuringly at me. “You don’t need to be scared.”
Inhaling, I kneel on the cushion, holding on to the rail as we sail across the lake. The cool wind pushes at me, making my breath stall with its fierceness. My insides vibrate with elation. Evie was right. This is incredible. I’m on top of the world. Unbreakable. Just like Rose in Titanic, I’m flying.
Bennett steps behind me. “Put your arms out.”
I do as he says and immediately regret it when I wobble from his nearness.
“You’re okay.” Bennett puts his hands under mine, steadying me. A sudden spark of electricity zips through me. My stomach flutters like sails on a boat.
“I hope me being this close doesn’t bother you,” Bennett whispers. His breath tickles my neck, sending tingles down my spine. “We do this every year. It’s silly, but fun.”
He likes doing this?
Huh.
Yet another thing to like about Bennett. He can let loose and do something a little childish.
I shiver. “It’s fine.” More than fine. My core temperature is skyrocketing despite the wind and spray of water in my face.
Bennett’s chest touches my back. I’m positive the warmth radiating between us is hot enough to register as dangerous on the heat index.
No wonder Jack did this with Rose. It’s incredibly romantic and sensual. I give in to the sensations I’m feeling, imagining what it would be like to date Bennett for real, though I know it’s a fantasy I’ll have to pop soon.
“Say cheese,” Evie says, holding up her phone.
I turn in her direction, my lips lifting into the widest smile possible.
The second Evie snaps the photo, Bennett steps back like I spit on him. My arms crash to my sides and I pitch forward. My head and shoulders go over the bow of the boat. Grasping desperately, I try to find anything to hold on to.
My hands meet air.
My heart beats like a drummer in a Mardis Gras parade. Holy Hannah.I’m going to die! “Ahhhh!”
Another scream pierces the air.
“Whoa!” Bennett yelps, reaching out and pulling me to safety. My back is snug against his magnificent chest as he holds me close. Our chests rise and fall in unison.
“Are you okay?” His hands pat my arms and shoulders. “I’m so sorry!”
Maybe don’t let go of me like I’m a leper next time?
“Millie! Are you okay?” Evie rips me away from Bennett and crushes me in a tight embrace.
I flip around and sit, placing a shaky hand over my pounding chest. “I’m good.” You know, besides my life flashing before my eyes.
Evie squeezes my shoulder. “You scared me. I seriously thought you were going overboard.”
Me too. “Thankfully, Bennett saved me.” Since he caused the fall.
Evie stares at Bennett, her brows creasing in the middle.
He barely shakes his head, giving her a look to let it go.
“Henry, come on,” Evie shouts to the back of the boat. “It’s our turn, but don’t you dare make me slip.” She hops up, kneeling on the seat.
Wait. Evs wants to do this after watching me almost fall to my death? Psycho.
Bennett sits across from me. He catches my gaze and immediately looks away, his jaw clenching, his fingers on his right hand twist around his left ring finger. His skin has lost all color. Is he upset? Concerned? Feeling guilty? I can’t quite read the expression, but whatever is happening is opposite from his “this is silly, but fun” comment from moments before. And now I’m worried about him. Is he going to be okay? What should I say or do to reassure him I’m fine?
Evelyn and Henry get in position. Henry holds on to Evie’s arms, keeping her secure. Watching those two together makes me miss Bennett standing close to me. The tingles and sparks shooting throughout my body. It’s like I rode a high (as short-lived as it was) and now I’m crashing, drowning in the lake below.
It’s most likely the after-crash of adrenaline from almost falling into the lake and being run over by the boat.
But I’m ninety-nine point nine percent certain it’s Bennett.
I keep saying to keep him as a friend, ignore the attraction, and I’m doing the exact opposite. This cycle makes me want to shake myself and scream, “stupid woman!” just like all those horror movies I watched when the teen went out at night to investigate a noise.
A job outside of this house as soon as possible is my only hope.
I tuck the loose strands of hair the wind tore from my braid behind my ear, watching Evie and Henry laugh as they pretend to be Jack and Rose.
When their turn is over, Evie sits next to me again. “What did you think?”
“It was fun.” For about thirty seconds.
“Everyone needs to experience it once in their life,” Emerson says.
“We’re happy to cross one more item off your ‘firsts list’.” Camden winks at me.
“Does this list contain a near-death experience?” I quirk a brow.
At the mention of death, everyone gets eerily quiet. Evie peeks at Bennett, and I mentally slap myself in the forehead. His wife died in an accident. How stupid can you be to bring that up, Mils?
My mouth goes dry. I’m appalled at my insensitivity.
The music changes to “Good Vibrations” by The Beach Boys.
Henry, faking enthusiasm, pumps a fist in the air. “Yeah! We’re going old school, baby!”
I force a smile as Henry sings and dances by himself in the back of the boat. The joy of the day is ripped away. All I want is to be alone where I won’t cause any problems.