Chapter 13
eel was pretending to watch an action movie when his friend Ryan arrived. He talked about sport, work, even the weather, but Neel knew why he was really there. Kaavi. It was sitting between them like a third person.
So when Ryan tried to launch yet another weather update, Neel muted the TV and shifted his position slightly to face his friend. ‘Say what you want to say, man.’
‘I can’t believe you ignored all my calls when you were in Rally,’ Ryan said.
‘It’s because I knew what you were going to say. You were going to say “you’re a fool for sticking around with Kaavi”. You were going to say I should’ve just handed her the divorce papers and walked.’
‘No, I don’t think you’re an idiot for standing by Kaavi when her father died. That’s you, Neel. It’s who you are. You stand by people. You support them. You always put others first.’
Neel let out a dry laugh. ‘Yeah, I guess I’m supposed to feel good about that, right?’
Ryan looked at him, unsure. ‘I don’t know what to say to you, Neel.’
Neel didn’t respond.
Ryan sat back, eyes fixed on him. ‘But you slept with her, right? Didn’t you?’
Silence.
‘Okay,’ Ryan said, nodding slowly. ‘So the spark’s still there. You still love her. She still hasn’t signed the divorce papers.’ He leaned forward. ‘What are you doing here, man?’
‘I’m leaving the ball in her court,’ Neel said.
‘Okay, I get that. Actually, no, I don’t get that, but obviously you do.
However, here’s what I really don’t understand.
What if she does nothing? What if she never sends the divorce papers?
What then? You’re going to wait around forever?
Keep putting your life on hold like you’ve been doing for the last two years? ’
‘Nope. From what I’ve seen this past month, I know Kaavi will send those divorce papers.’
‘What makes you so sure?’ Ryan asked.
‘Her cousin will talk some sense into her,’ Neel said. He paused and looked at the TV. ‘Kaavi knows I love her, but I don’t know if she loves me.’
‘So you think she’ll choose the divorce over you?’
Neel didn’t respond.
Kaavi was on packaging duty. The others had made it clear that she wasn’t allowed near a single ingredient. Her job was simple: fold the beautifully decorated boxes that would hold the sweetmeats for Shona and Sen to hand out to family and friends for Diwali.
Sam and Anni didn’t observe Diwali themselves, but they always celebrated with Shona and Sen – even before they were married. So they were there too, helping where they could.
The kitchen was a mess with mixing bowls, spatulas, measuring cups and ingredients covering every surface in sight. It was loud, warm and smelled like sugar and spice.
Kaavi tried to hide her smile as she watched her cousin.
Sen was barely holding it together. He was a structured guy.
He liked everything in its place, neat and tidy.
Chaos and Sen? Never a good mix. But now that she really looked at it, maybe they were.
Because Shona was pure chaos. And somehow, they worked.
That made Kaavi think. Maybe marriage was controlled chaos.
Or, at least, it was about compromise and about figuring out how to meet in the middle, even if the middle was messy.
That made her sad because she realised that she never gave her marriage to Neel a chance to even see if they would be able to compromise on things.
When she left, they were still in that honeymoon phase and she wondered – actually she knew – that Neel would compromise.
She knew that Neel would be a good husband because he was a good husband.
And it was only that secret, that fear of her father finding out about her marriage, that had made her walk.
She still loved Neel. She loved him with all her heart.
She couldn’t deny that. But she also couldn’t rob him of finding happiness with somebody instead of feeling sorry for her because she was broken.
‘Why are you so quiet today?’ asked Anni, as she watched Kaavi fold another box.
‘Just thinking,’ Kaavi said.
‘About what?’
‘The empowerment classes,’ she lied.
‘Oh yeah,’ Anni nodded. ‘Your grandfather said you started working on that plan.’
She paused, then smiled. ‘Honestly Kaavi, I think this … it’s going to be a really good fit for you. You just don’t realise how good you were with those girls.’
‘Thanks, Anni,’ Kaavi said quietly.
‘What about Neel?’ Sam chipped in.
‘Hey! Sam! Be quiet,’ Anni scolded.
Kaavi chuckled. ‘It’s okay, Anni. I guess everyone wants to know about Neel. You guys met him and, yeah, I’m married to him. I mean, I can’t hide that.’
She took a breath. ‘But he’s gone. He’s gone back to Johannesburg. That’s what happened to Neel.’
Sam shook his head. ‘Stupidity runs in this family,’ he said, looking at Kaavi and then at Sen.
‘Hey!’ Sen and Kaavi said at the same time.
Sam laughed. ‘I’m serious. This is exactly what happened with Sen when he couldn’t tell Shona he loved her. I had to sit him down and explain what a fool he was being.’
He looked at Kaavi. ‘And I think I’m about to do the same with you.’
‘Wow!’ Kaavi said.
Anni grinned. ‘When did my husband become such a relationship therapist?’
Sam ignored Anni and focused on Kaavi.
‘Listen, Kaavi. You’ve been with us a while now. You’re one of the gang. We love you like family and we’ll always be here for you.’
He took a breath. ‘Neel’s a great guy. He’s … solid. Really solid and I don’t know if you want to throw that away.’
He looked at her, serious now. ‘If he’d done something wrong to you, I’d get it, but all he’s ever done is love you.’
‘Wow,’ Sen said. ‘You really are like a relationship therapist.’
Even Shona jumped in. ‘Seriously though, Kaavi, Sam is right. And I’m not just saying that because he thinks he is a part-time relationship therapist,’ she laughed, ‘but because he’s right. You can’t let Neel go.’
Kaavi didn’t say a word. She just kept folding boxes.
The four of them watched her, shook their heads, then went back to preparing the sweetmeats.
The evening moved on with chatter about Diwali plans. Shona, Sen, Kaavi, even Anni and Sam, were all set to go to her grandfather’s house. Her mother, aunt and uncle would be there too. It promised to be a joyous celebration. And Kaavi would just pretend everything was fine.
Kaavi’s hands were sticky from all the cellophane tape. She stood up, walked to the sink, and started washing them. As the water ran over her fingers, her wedding ring caught the light and sparkled.
And that’s when it hit her.
She hadn’t taken it off. Not once. Not since Neel slipped it onto her finger less than a month ago.
She spun around, water still running behind her.
‘I’m going to Jo’burg,’ she announced.
Sen, who was closest, reached over and turned off the tap. ‘What do you mean you’re going to Jo’burg?’
Kaavi grabbed a kitchen towel, drying her hands. ‘I’m going to get my husband back. I want to be with Neel. I have to be with Neel. Neel is my future.’
‘What did I tell you guys?’ Sam joked. ‘I’m really good at giving relationship advice.’
Anni and Shona burst out laughing, but Sen didn’t. He looked at Kaavi, steady and serious.
‘Are you sure?’
Kaavi nodded. ‘Yes, I’m sure. I can’t believe I let this go on for so long. That I’ve been without Neel for this long.’
She looked around the kitchen, heart thumping.
‘I have to go to Jo’burg.’
Sen grabbed his laptop, putting it on the only free spot on the counter, while the rest of them worked on the sweetmeats. ‘Okay, I’ve checked all the airlines. The next flight’s tomorrow at 11 am. After that, the next one’s Friday. I’ve looked everywhere. So, what do you want to do, Kaavi?’
Kaavi shrugged. ‘I don’t even know where Neel will be, probably with his parents. I could just get a hotel nearby and see him the next day.’
Sam jumped in, grinning. ‘Or you could go straight to his family’s place. You know, make a grand appearance.’
Shona and Anni exchanged amused glances. ‘Wow Sam, look at you, the relationship guru,’ Shona teased.
Sam waved it off. ‘Nah, I’m a doctor. I observe people. I know what makes them tick.’
His wife laughed. ‘Yeah, sure, and you also binge those K-dramas all weekend.’
Sam laughed and then turned back to Kaavi.
‘I think you should go tomorrow,’ Sam said, leaning in.
‘And honestly, I might be right, you just show up at his parents’ place.
Look, the guy’s probably feeling awful, especially with it being Diwali.
It’s only making things worse for him. Do him a favour – go straight there from the airport and put him out of his misery. ’
Kaavi hesitated. ‘I don’t know. How will Neel react? Is he really miserable without me? Would he even want me back?’
The kitchen fell quiet for a moment. Then Sen spoke, steady and sure. ‘Kaavi, Neel’s always wanted you back. We all knew it. We were just waiting for you to see it too. Now, I’m booking this flight and you’re getting on it.’
He glanced at Shona. ‘Shona and I are heading to Durban tomorrow morning to drop off Diwali goodies with her sister. We’ll give you a lift to the airport.’
Kaavi nodded, her voice caught somewhere between hope and fear. Shona stepped over and gently rubbed her back. ‘I know you won’t sleep tonight. I know you just want to tell him everything. If it feels easier, you can call him first, say what you need to say over the phone.’
But Kaavi shook her head firmly. ‘No. I think I need to see him. I need him to look into my eyes and know I’m being honest, that I want to be with him, that I mean it. I want Neel. I want to be his wife.’
Kaavi’s flight was delayed. She sat at the airport, watching the sun dip lower in the sky.
The plan had been simple: land in Johannesburg, take an Uber to Neel’s parents’ house, and finally see him.
Sen had used his contacts to get their address.
By now, if all had gone according to plan, she would already have been in his arms. Instead, she was stuck here, waiting.