29. Chapter 29
Lydia
The morning light filters through the curtains, painting soft stripes across the new green couch, a small comfort in a world that feels anything but settled.
I sit curled up, knees hugged to my chest, coffee cooling on the table beside me.
The appointment with Norah looms heavy on my mind, a knot of nerves tightening with every tick of the clock.
I try to lose myself in the sounds of the house: the clock ticking in the kitchen, the breeze blowing the curtains by the window behind me. I know I need to dissociate for a bit to calm my nerves, but it isn’t really working.
My phone buzzes, startling me out of my spiral. A message from Nick lights up the screen.
Nick: Good morning, pretty girl. Thinking about you today. You’ve got this. Whatever happens, I’m here if you need me. Call me if you need to talk.
I smile despite myself, my heart fluttering at the simple reassurance. I type back a quick “thank you,” fingers trembling just a little. His words are comforting, but the anxiety doesn’t quite fade.
What will Norah say? Is there news about the divorce, or some complication she didn’t anticipate?
My stomach churns with worry, my mind replaying every conversation with Simon.
I knew he wasn’t going to make this easy for me, so whatever has come up shouldn’t come as a surprise.
I am just so over the entire situation. I want more than anything to move on.
To live a life I love. Is that too much to ask for? I don’t think so.
I want to live in my tiny little cottage, work at the cute bookstore, live in this picturesque, mountainside town, and make my own choices. Be whoever it is I was born to be. At twenty-five, I’m still not entirely sure who that even is. But I am so excited to find out.
And there is Nick.
I want to believe I am brave; Nick has told me I am, and even Norah has said it too, but today, my anxiety feels stronger than any courage I thought I had.
After allowing myself twenty minutes of freak-out time, I push my anxiety aside and get ready, taking extra time to put on makeup and lightly tame my hair.
When I am done, I evaluate my reflection in the mirror and tell myself I can face whatever the day brings.
No matter what happens, I will be fine. I will get through it.
From my closet, I pick a long, simple sundress and sandals.
The dress is simple but flattering, and I grab a pair of sunglasses and a jean jacket on my way out the door.
On the walk toward Norah’s office, I decide against stopping for coffee since I am afraid the caffeine may make me even more jittery. That’s the last thing I need.
As I walk down beautiful Main Street, I am once again struck with gratitude for having landed here.
This town has become my fresh start, my sanctuary of sorts.
I will be forever grateful for the soft landing it has provided.
As I round the corner to the front of Norah’s office, I stop to dig through my purse, looking for a mint or a piece of gum.
Anything to keep me a little preoccupied while I wait.
As soon as I gig out a piece, I take a deep breath and open the door, trying to steady my breathing and appear calmer than I am.
As I walk in, I am greeted by Marcus, who is animatedly talking on the phone.
He smiles, big and contagious, motioning for me to take a seat.
I sit in one of the plush, plum-colored chairs and try to not appear as nervous as I feel, but I am pretty certain my bouncing knee gives me away.
Absentmindedly, I keep bringing my fingers to my mouth to bite my nails, but forcefully tear them away each time.
I had broken the habit, and I hate how I’ve picked it back up again.
Just as I am about to chomp down on my cuticle for the one hundredth time, Norah comes out and waves me back. She has a smile on her pretty face, but it feels slightly off somehow. I take another deep breath and follow her into her office.
Norah ushers me in first, shutting the door behind me, then rounds her desk to take a seat. Placing her elbows on the surface and clasping her hands together, she focuses on me.
“I’m sorry if I’ve made you anxious about this meeting today, but I have some news. Some big news, and I’m not quite sure how you’re going to take it. So I’m just going to spit it out.”
Here we go, I think, clasping my hands in my lap.
“Simon is not your husband, Lydia. You two were never legally married,” Norah says in such a calm, matter-of-fact tone I’m certain I haven’t heard her correctly.
“I’m s-sorry? Can you repeat that, p-please?” I hear myself stuttering. My voice doesn’t sound like my own.
“Simon Dryer is not your husband,” she says coolly, pausing to make sure I’m understanding.
“Seven years ago, he married a woman named Savannah Greene in Portland, Oregon. There is no record of them ever getting legally divorced. According to housing records over there, Simon and Savannah bought a home together eight years ago.”
Is the room spinning? I can feel myself starting to sweat.
“But we were married five years ago. How is that possible?”
Someone must have turned the heating on. I want to shout at Marcus to turn it off, but I suddenly can’t feel my tongue. Is it still in my mouth? I bite down, a bit too hard, and yelp.
Yep, still there.
“Simon Dryer is a much bigger creep than we initially thought. From your description alone, we knew he was an abusive prick, but once I got to digging, I found he’s so much worse,” Norah explains, leaning back in her chair slightly.
“When I start the divorce proceedings for any client, legally it is necessary to pull marriage records and check for prior divorce decrees. While previous divorces came up empty, his marriage to Ms. Greene did show.”
I feel numb.
Not sad. Not angry.
Just numb.
“What does this mean?” I ask, my voice thin and shaky.
Norah pauses, her expression softening. “It means your marriage to Simon was never legally recognized, Lydia. It’s as if, in the eyes of the law, it never happened.
I know that’s hard to process, but it also means you aren’t bound to him in the way you feared.
” She reaches across the desk and takes my hand, offering it a gentle squeeze.
“The next steps will be untangling any shared assets or obligations, but legally, you are free.”
Free.
Free.
What does that even mean? I sit there, my thoughts swirling as I try to process the reality in front of me.
For years, I have been consumed by anxiety and fear, dreading what Simon might do if I ever got the nerve to walk away.
Every step, every decision, every quiet moment was shadowed by the weight of our supposed marriage.
I was led to believe I was legally tied to him and escaping would come at a terrible cost. But now, in just a span of a couple of minutes, everything I thought I knew has been upended.
Legally, I am not bound to him, which means the chains I feel were only ever in my mind, not in the eyes of the law.
I can move on.
I’m overwhelmed with so many emotions, I don’t even know what to say. Thank you doesn’t seem like enough, but it’s a start.
“Thank you, Norah. Just, thank you.” I’m unable to stop my eyes filling with tears.
Norah gets up and rounds her desk, reaching out in the same way she did at our last meeting. “I am so happy for you, Lydia.” She wraps her arms around me, giving me the hug I so desperately need.
I squeeze her back, tempted to thank her again. We stand here for a moment, one friend consoling the other. I pull back, seeing Norah’s eyes are also glimmering with tears.
“You don’t have to figure it all out right now,” she says softly. “Take your time. This is a lot to take in, and you deserve space to just breathe.”
The silence between us is gentle and reassuring, a rare moment free of fear or expectation. I allow myself to lean into that comfort, realizing I am standing on the edge of a new beginning, despite how uncertain it feels.
After Norah and I say our goodbyes and I thank her at least four more times, I walk out of her office feeling lighter than I have in months, possibly years. I stop by Marcus’ desk, making sure I take care of my bill. I have been saving all I can to make sure everything is paid on time and in full.
As I stop in front of the lovely gentleman with cinnamon eyes and wavy black hair, he looks up at me. His smile is big but gentle, his eyes kind and understanding. “Well, hello, Miss Lydia. You look like you got some good news today.”
“I did, Marcus. I really, really did. I’d like to take care of what I owe for Norah’s time. I also forgot to pay after my last appointment.” I pull out my wallet, almost embarrassed to pay with all cash, but force myself to brush the feeling aside. No one in this office is going to judge me.
Marcus tells me my total, which is far less than I was expecting. I had a feeling Norah was going to give me some kind of deal, and I am truly grateful she did. As soon as all the paperwork is done and my bill is paid, I turn and walk out the door, giving Marcus another small wave.
As soon as I step outside, I can’t help but look up to the sky and soak in the sunshine. As I breathe in the clean mountain air, the first thing I want to do instantly springs to mind.
I want to tell Nick.
I pull out my phone and bring up our text thread.
Me: Hey. Are you busy?
His response only takes a few seconds, as if he’s been waiting to hear from me.
Nick: Hey, pretty girl. Nope. Just finishing up a project in the garage. What’s up? Everything okay?
Me: Everything is great. Want to have lunch at my house?
Nick: That sounds great. I’ll see you there in just a few.
Me: Perfect. I’ll see you there.
My heart does the skippy-beat thing it does a lot when I think of Nick. I smile to myself, fluff my hair, put on some lip gloss, and head toward home.