36. Chapter 36
Lydia
I walk through the store gathering the stuff to make spaghetti and garlic bread. I’m not sure if Nick is a wine drinker, so I also grab a six-pack of beer. Taking all my stuff to the checkout line, I smile up at Glen. I’m pretty sure his name is Glen, at least.
He smiles back and starts scanning my groceries. “Well, hi there, Miss. Are you doing alright today?”
“I am. How about you?” You can’t help but love the guy. He has the kindest eyes.
“Better than I deserve, ma’am. Better than I deserve,” he says with a slight nod of his head. He finishes ringing up my items, and I pay, giving Glen another smile before I leave. Everyone in this town is just so nice. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to it.
Nick and I haven’t specified an exact time for dinner, but I assume around six. I put my groceries away and try to find a clip to throw my hair up before heading for the shower.
My phone dings with a new message.
Nick: Just thinking of you. See you soon.
Is this man even for real? I know I have zero chill already, but a sweet “just because” text has me turning to mush right here on the bathroom floor.
I’m not sure what to send back without potentially embarrassing myself, so I just send a kissing face emoji and toss my phone on the counter like it’s a hot potato.
I hop in the shower, telling myself to calm the heck down.
After scrubbing, shaving, and moisturizing all the places I need to, my breathing has calmed down enough to put on a bit of makeup.
I pull my hair from the clip, letting the messy waves hit my shoulders.
I really do love my natural hair texture.
I used to straighten it for so long, but now I love the way it makes me feel. Untamed; a bit wild.
I walk to my closet, unsure of what to wear.
It’s dinner at home, so my first thought is casual, but I also want to look nice.
I end up choosing a pair of loose-fitting jeans with the knees ripped out and a fitted black top.
It’s still casual, but at least it looks like I’ve put in effort.
I head into the kitchen to pour a glass of wine.
I’m not as nervous as I was. I’m just genuinely excited to get to spend time with Nick and see where the night goes.
I know where I want it to go, but I want everything to happen organically and at the right time.
I have checked the oven twice and the clock at least six times, even though I know exactly what time it is. The house smells like garlic and butter. I keep telling myself this is just dinner. Just food. Just Nick coming over. Though the knock at the door still makes me jump.
I take a breath, smooth my hands down the front of my top, and cross the room. When I open the door, Nick is standing on my porch, the evening light catching his hair as he cradles a bundle of wildflowers carefully in his hands.
For a moment, neither of us speaks.
The flowers aren’t arranged or wrapped in anything fancy, just a loose gathering of color and green, stems still long, petals slightly uneven. It’s as if he’s picked them from the side of the road on the way here. The sight of them tugs something open in my chest.
I smile before I can stop myself, soft and probably a little goofy. “They’re perfect,” I say. And I mean it. When I reach for them, my fingers brush his, sending a shot of electricity to my belly.
Nick lets out a breath that sounds like relief.
“Hi,” he adds, almost sheepish.
“Hi,” I echo, stepping back to let him in, my heart still thudding in a way that has nothing to do with nerves.
He brushes past me as he walks through the doorway.
Damn, he smells good, I think to myself.
Nick stops just inside the living room, taking in everything I’ve done to get ready for the evening. I worried that I might have gone overboard with the candles and the wine, but the look on his face says he’s as excited about the evening as I am.
“It looks great in here. Dinner smells amazing too.” He turns to look at me, taking me in fully.
“And you look beautiful,” he says as he gently kisses my cheek. I feel myself blush from my head to my toes. “You look great too. I hope you like spaghetti and wine. I also grabbed beer in case wine isn’t your thing. Can I get you some?”
Why am I rambling? I didn’t think I would be nervous. I don’t want to be nervous, but here I am, rambling like an idiot. Like a big, nervous idiot.
I have to do something to shut myself up, so I go into the kitchen and find another mason jar, similar to the one I used the last time he brought me flowers, just a little smaller.
I fill it with water and place the flowers in it, arranging them gently and placing them beside the other bouquet on the counter.
Those flowers are nearing the end of their days, but I hate the idea of throwing them out just yet.
I can feel Nick behind me before I hear him, the heat from his body emanating off him. He places a hand gently on the small of my back and drops his chin to my shoulder.
“You’re not nervous, are you, Lydi?” he asks softly, his mouth right next to my ear. “Because there’s no need to be. It’s just me.”
I turn to look up at him. Having him so close does a number on my already pounding heart, but looking into his eyes also calms me, so I focus on those.
“I didn’t think I was. I’ve been excited all day, but then you show up and you look…” I wave a hand up and down the length of his body. “Like that! And you smell absolutely delicious, and I swear my damn brain went right out the window.”
I grab my wine glass and take a big, deep gulp.
I can see Nick’s eyes spark with amusement at my rambling outburst.
He steps into me just a bit further, keeping his hand at my waist.
“I love the way you ramble.” He leans down, placing a featherlight kiss to my jaw.
“I also love the way you’ve put in so much effort to make this evening special.
Thank you for that.” He leans back in and kisses the other side of my jaw.
“And I also love the way your ass looks in these jeans and the way your hair looks wild and beautiful. You’re breathtaking,” he whispers the last sentence as he places a kiss further down my neck, pausing a moment to breathe me in.
It feels as if he’s savoring me. This man is breathing me in as though he’s trying to make sure I’m really here.
Oh my God.
Finally, Nick straightens and steps back half a step, still holding my gaze. “Dinner smells great. What can I do to help?”
And with that, my heart calms the fuck down and we settle into a perfect rhythm of finishing up getting the food ready. I pour us each a new glass of wine as he carries our plates to the small table I set with a candle.
Once we both sit down and start eating, we ease into conversation.
I’ve always found Nick easy to talk to, and tonight is no different.
We talk about our days and whatever else we can come up with.
He tells me about his dad’s passing and how hard it’s been.
We talk about childhood memories. I have been so secluded from so much during my marriage, I don’t have many interesting stories to tell, but I do tell him about my grandma and how special she is to me.
She died when I was little, but she is the best person I have ever known.
It’s all so easy and nice, and I can’t find it in myself to be nervous about anything anymore. I’m just excited for what I hope is coming next.
When we are both done, I reach over to get Nick’s plate to take it to the sink, but he stops me, gently placing his hand over mine.
“Let me clean up. You grab another glass of wine and go relax. I’ll be quick.
” He winks before grabbing both our plates, leaving no room for argument. Not that I really want to.
I watch as he rolls his sleeves up to his forearms. My breath hitches just a bit.
He has the sexiest arms. Seeing Nick doing dishes in my tiny kitchen with his forearms displayed in all their glory melts my insides.
When the man has the audacity to toss a dish towel over his shoulder, I know I need to leave the room before I do something embarrassing like jump in his arms and offer to have his babies.
I walk toward the bathroom, as slow as I can, and gently shut the door behind me. I want to freshen up a bit after dinner and maybe brush my teeth to get rid of the garlic smell. I’m putting on another round of deodorant when I hear soft music playing in the living room.
I walk out to see Nick standing in the middle of the room, hands shoved in his pockets, looking right at me as “Forever After All” by Luke Combs plays softly in the background.
He reaches one hand out for me, and I take it easily, letting him pull me into his arms. We sway back and forth silently, without the need to exchange words.
I can’t help but bury my face into his neck.
We dance like this for the entire song, neither of us attempting to move until it’s over and a new one starts. I recognize this one too. “Ocean Eyes” by Billie Eilish is now playing from the speakers, and I feel Nick’s chest rumble a bit as I pull my head away to look up at him.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing. It’s just perfect this song came on. I remember thinking the day we met your eyes reminded me of the ocean. And since then, I’ve always described them to myself as your ocean eyes.”
Good God, he says the sweetest things. I reach my hands up to the back of his neck, coaxing him down gently toward me, meeting his mouth with mine in a soft brush. Then again, a little surer. It isn’t rushed or hungry, just warm and sweet, like we’re memorizing the feel of one another.
“Sweet Jane” by the Cowboy Junkies is playing as I lift my head, meeting his eyes.
“Come with me?” I ask him softly.
Nick nods slowly. “Are you sure?”
His eyes never leave my own. I feel the soft smile spread across my lips as I continue to look up at him. I am so sure, so calm, and so ready for this next step with Nick. I let my hand fall to meet his, where he takes it gently and leads me to my bedroom, shutting the door behind us.