Chapter 1
“ W here you at?” Steel questioned as I rushed around my house to finish getting ready.
“Kerrion, you’re in my business.”
“Mama asked me to call you. You missed dinner.”
“I’m aware.”
“So what are you doing?”
“Trying to figure some weird shit out. Something is up with my computer.”
“Shit, I can’t help you with that.”
I kissed my teeth. “Of course you can’t.”
“What time are you gonna get here, man?”
“Kerrion! I don’t know! I’m getting ready now.”
“Aye, pipe all that yelling down. I’m just the messenger. Save all that for your mama. You know better than to yell at her.”
I sighed. “I’ll see you when I get to the house. Bye.”
I hung up and shoved my phone into my pocket.
I was already irritated that I had to stop what I was doing, but I promised my mother I would come over today.
I was supposed to leave earlier, but I messed around and found spyware on my computer.
For the last four hours, I’d been trying to track down the source of it.
I had my suspicions for a while now that something funny was going on.
Any time I was working a case, information pertaining to the case would show up in my files that I knew I didn’t access.
It was like someone was helping me, and I didn’t like that shit.
How someone had gotten past my very secure firewall was beyond me, and it put everything I was working on at risk.
I’d been so close to cracking the case until my mother called me three times to remind me of where I was supposed to be.
“Fuck!” I yelled, stubbing my toe on my bed.
I sat down, fighting the urge to cry because it hurt that bad.
After a few deep breaths, I slipped my shoes on and grabbed my crossbody before heading downstairs.
As I opened my front door, there stood Mia, preparing to knock.
The look on her face told me she was coming to complain about something, probably Titan, and I just didn’t have time for it.
“Where are you going?” she asked as I brushed past her.
“Dinner at my mom’s.”
“Do you have a second? I really need to?—”
“No, Mia. I don’t. I’m already late. I’ll call you tonight.”
I hurried and got in my car, leaving her on the porch in protest. I knew it was going to be the same old song and dance.
Titan did this. Titan did that. Titan gets on my nerves.
For someone that seemed to hate him so much, she also couldn’t stay away from him.
I didn’t have a man, but there was no way in hell I could deal with a situation as toxic as theirs.
I left the compound and headed for my mama’s house.
Tavia Jenkins was going to have my head, so I had to prepare to hear her mouth.
I loved my mother dearly. Growing up, it was like I had three mothers instead of one because we were always between home, Mama Stephanie’s, or Mama Allison’s when we weren’t with my daddy.
As toxic as it could have been, it was a blessing that all his baby mamas got along.
The three of them came together to raise Senior’s children and ensure we all had a great relationship.
Did we fight like cats and dogs sometimes?
Absolutely. But there has never been a time when we didn’t have each other’s back.
If you messed with one Dillinger, you messed with all of them.
My brothers were a lot by themselves, but when you added my cousins to the mix, it could be a total shit show.
That thought made me feel bad about dismissing Mia the way I did. She had her flaws, but she was my little sister. With a heavy sigh, I called her through Bluetooth.
“What?” she answered in a snappy tone.
“Try that again.”
“So, you can snap at me, but I can’t snap back?”
“I’m sorry, okay. I’ve had a frustrating day.”
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s nothing you can help with. I’ll figure it out soon enough. Anyway, what’s going on with you?”
She sighed. “Titan. Sis, I don’t know what it is about that man. He gets on my last nerves, but—I don’t know.”
“Just admit all that hate you have is really love, Mia.”
She scoffed. “I do not love that arrogant asshole!”
I laughed. “I hate to tell you this, but y’all are one in the same. That’s why y’all have that toxic shit going on. Neither of you will admit that you actually like each other.”
“I like his body parts, not him.”
“Girl, please. No dick is that good.”
“How would you know? Did you finally let someone pop that cherry and not tell me?”
“Bye, Mia.”
“Wait! What am I gonna do about him, Jae?”
I shrugged like she could see me. “I don’t know.
Maybe try giving things a chance. Just don’t be toxic.
Stop being in competition with each other, and stop using your body parts as the only connection between you two.
Y’all might find you actually like each other for more than what’s between your legs. ”
Mia huffed. “I don’t know if I like this.”
“Well, I don’t know what to tell you. Look, we can have lunch tomorrow and we can talk about Titan all you want. Right now, I have to mentally prepare myself for dinner with my family.”
“Ugh. Fine! Tell everyone I said hey, bitch. Love you.”
“I love you too.”
I hung up and focused my attention back on the road.
I got to my childhood home about twenty minutes later.
Sighing, I got out of the car and headed inside.
When I walked in, I could hear my family in the kitchen.
Kicking off my shoes, I made my way to join them.
My mother, my stepfather, Hershel, Steel, our fourteen-year-old little sister, Kalia, and eight-year-old little brother, Jaiden, sat at the table eating ice-cream sundaes and laughing.
When my mother saw me, she smiled and stood to her feet.
“Hey, sugar,” she said, calling me by the nickname she’d given me as a kid.
She pulled me into a warm embrace, and I melted in her arms. She was being really nice, considering I was late.
“Hey, Mommy.”
“You missed dinner, but I saved you a plate. Have a seat, and I’ll warm it up for you.”
“Thank you.”
As she moved to warm my food, I made my rounds, hugging everybody. When I got to Steel, I put him in a headlock that caused our siblings to laugh.
“All right now,” he warned. “When it’s my turn, I don’t wanna hear you complaining that I messed up your hair. Watch me pull a track out.”
“First of all, this is all mine, and you know it,” I said, smacking the back of his head. “Just because you deal with bald-headed heifers doesn’t mean you can come for me.”
“That was one time,” he defended.
I rolled my eyes as my mother set my plate in front of me. “Thank you, Mommy.”
“You’re welcome.” She took a seat and grabbed my stepfather’s hand. “Now that we’re all together, we have something to tell you.”
I stopped mid chew and glanced over at her. “Is it good or bad?”
She looked at Hershel, and he grinned.
“It’s good,” he said. “Shocking, but good.”
That was when I noticed how radiant she was. I mean, she was practically glowing.
“Oh my God, . . .” I said. “Oh. My. God! Mommy, please tell me you’re joking.”
She giggled. “I can’t. We’re having a baby!”
Steel almost choked on his ice cream. “You said what now?”
“We’re having a baby.” She stood and lifted her oversized shirt to show a very noticeable pudge.
“Hershel, how are you out here getting my mama pregnant, man?” Steel asked.
Hershel laughed. “I mean, she let me.”
Kalia shook her head. “Ma, you’re forty-nine. Why would you have another baby?”
My mother rubbed her stomach as she looked at us. “This wasn’t planned, but this baby is a blessing, just like all of you are.”
“Are you okay for this?” I asked. “Statistically speaking?”
“I’m healthy. The baby’s healthy. I just have to make sure I’m careful.”
“Um, where is this baby gonna sleep?” Kaila asked. “I’m not sharing my room. I need my privacy.”
Steel kissed his teeth. “Privacy for what? All you do is gossip on that phone with your bird brain ass friends.”
“What’s a bird brain?” Jaiden asked.
Kalia put a hand in his face. “My friends are not birds, and Deja is who I talk to the most.”
“Let me guess. About Kilow?”
“Not necessarily . . .”
The look on her face told me exactly what they talked about.
Kalia had a crush on Damaris. If he didn’t have almost five years on her, it wouldn’t be a problem.
I’d explained that to her time and time again.
In her head, by the time she was eighteen, the age wouldn’t matter.
That was where she thought wrong. Eighteen was legal, but it wasn’t grown.
“The answer is still no, Kalia,” I reminded her. “Anyway, mine and Kerrion’s rooms are still here. The baby can sleep there.”
My brother scoffed. “Speak for yourself. What if I want to come home? Where am I gonna sleep? Imagine my big ass on the couch.”
Our mother rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. You would sleep with this baby on your chest, just like you did with Kalia and Jaiden.” She pulled up a picture on her phone to show everyone. “Y’all were so adorable!”
I giggled because my brother put on a front, but he loved kids.
The kids that took his self-defense classes loved themselves some Mr. K.
He was patient with them and for some, the only male role model they had in their lives.
They respected him so much, and I knew the day he had kids of his own, he was going to be an amazing father.
“Does anybody else know?” Steel asked.
“Of course, Stephanie and Allison know.”
My brother smirked. “You and Pops are almost neck and neck now.”
“Shut up, Kerrion. For all we know, another child could pop out the woodworks for your daddy. We thought Jaeda was the last one, then here came Mia.”
Mia was definitely a surprise, but it didn’t take long for it to feel like she’d been here all along. My siblings worked my nerves at times, but I loved them with every piece of my heart. I knew it would be no different with this baby.
“Well, congratulations,” I said, standing to hug her and Hershel.
Steel stood to follow suit. “Don’t ask me to babysit,” he jested.
Our mother rolled her eyes. “I bet you will.”
“I just turned twenty-eight, and you two started over. Ain’t that about a bi?—”
Mama grabbed his lips and twisted them. “Watch your mouth. You aren’t too old for me to pull out my belt.”
“Whip his butt, Mama!” Jaiden encouraged.
Steel grabbed a napkin and balled it up before throwing it at him. “Traitor.”
Jaiden stuck his tongue out and laughed.
All conversation flowed to the impending arrival of our new little brother or sister. My mom and Hershel seemed happy, so that was all I could ask for. Still, somewhere in the back of my mind, it made me wonder if I was ever going to have a moment like this.