Chapter 51
Jamie
I pace around the Doctor’s apartment, doing my best not to nose through his things. I’d asked if I could wait for him here because he didn’t want me to wait at the hospital, and I couldn’t bear to be away from him. I never thought he’d actually give me his house keys.
I’ve never had anyone else’s house key before.
Even as a kid, I didn’t have one, and I still don’t have a key to my sister’s place, unlike the O’Connors.
The Doctor handed me his like it was no big deal.
Maybe it’s normal — we’re sort of dating, I’ve stayed over, slept in his bed, and he’s taken care of me when I’ve been sick.
That’s how things go, right? For normal people, anyway — not for jerks like the ones I usually hang out with, and definitely not for me.
Don’t panic now, Jamie.
It’s not like he got down on one knee and asked you to fucking marry him.
They’re only keys. That’s all.
They don’t have to mean anything else.
I sit on the sofa and look around. He keeps a few things — pictures of Evan and a few of Evan as a baby. He displays little but hides nothing. I grab the remote to find something to watch, but he doesn’t even have Netflix.
Where on earth does he live?
I put on an action movie that’s already started, stretch out on the sofa, and let the scenes distract me, even if they don’t really hold my attention. If I let my mind wander right now, I’d probably run again — and I’m afraid I wouldn’t come back this time.
A knock at the door wakes me. I blink myself awake, realising I must have fallen asleep. As I sit up, I check my watch — one in the morning
“Hey,” he says, wearing his best puppy-dog face. “I tried to warn you, but you didn’t answer.”
“I fell asleep,” I admit as he steps inside.
“I was so late. I’m sorry.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“I brought you something, though. I stopped at one of those twenty-four-hour gas stations. They didn’t have much, but I got us hot chocolate and some cookies. I figured you probably hadn’t eaten.”
“That’s fine.”
The Doctor sets everything on the table and shrugs off his jacket.
“I bet you’re exhausted.”
“Nah, I’m fine. I couldn’t wait to get home.” He reaches over, hooks a finger in my shirt, and tugs me closer.
I slide my hands over his face and pull him in. “I might stay this time.”
“What do you mean?”
“I brought my bag.”
“Oh…”
“I’ve got practice in the morning, so I won’t have to stop at home first. And maybe I could drop in on my sister, since I’m here and…”
Then the Doctor kisses me, cutting off my last words and my weak attempt to lie.
I wasn’t going anywhere. I didn’t care about practice, the bag, or anything else.
All I wanted was to be here, in his house, with him. To sleep in his bed, safe from monsters and dragons.
“Would you like to read?” I ask him.
He looks at me, puzzled.
“I’d like to finish that book.”
“That’s not just some way of saying something else that I don’t know about, is it?”
I laugh. “No, it’s the truth. Does that sound so strange to you?”
“What? That you’re interested in a book?”
“That I’m not interested in anything else.”
“By anything else, you mean sex, yeah?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, good. At least I still get it.”
“I want it, Doctor.” I take his face in my palms again and pull him closer. “I want it so damn much.”
“Good to know.”
“And you?”
“Are you really asking me that? Just seeing you in my house, with that dangerous little face of yours, that messed-up hair, and that pants-dropping grin… I’m hard just looking at you.”
I laugh at how honest he is and kiss him again.
“And that’s not helping.”
“You make things very difficult for me, Doctor.”
“You’re hardly easy yourself, you know that?”
I let him go slowly, then take his hand. “Come on. Let’s go to your bedroom. We have some reading to do.”
“You care that much about that book?”
“I like hearing you read. I love watching your eyes follow the lines, your voice rising and falling with the story, your lips moving slowly. I like how your voice shakes a bit when it gets intense, and the slow, sensual way your mouth just rolls over every word…”
“That’s it. You’ve landed me in trouble again.”
I lean in, my mouth close to his ear. “Do you see now why I like that book so much?”
He turns to me and brushes his lips over mine. “I’m starting to really like it myself.”