Chapter 16 #3
She waits half a second. Then her mouth twists. “That’s what I thought.” She turns like she’s done with this. Like she’s going to walk out of this room and leave me standing here with everything still clawing at the inside of my chest.
And that I can’t let happen. Not tonight. Not after what she just did.
I catch her wrist.
She freezes. Same as before. Same exact moment. Except this time, neither of us pulls away right away.
Her pulse is fast under my fingers.
Mine is worse.
“Don’t,” she says, but it’s quieter now. Less sharp. More…I don’t even know.
“Don’t what?” I ask, even though I already know.
“Don’t act like this doesn’t matter and then grab me like it does.”
That lands harder than anything else she’s said tonight.
Because it’s the truth. Because I’ve been doing exactly that. Because I don’t get to pretend this is nothing when my hand is wrapped around her wrist like I don’t plan on letting go.
I step closer.
She doesn’t move back.
We’re right there now.
No space left. No excuses left either.
“You wanted me to see you,” I say again, quieter this time.
Her breath catches. “Yes.”
“Congratulations,” I mutter. “I see you.”
Something in her expression shifts.
Not victory. Not exactly.
Something deeper. Something that looks a hell of a lot like relief wrapped in frustration and something even more dangerous underneath.
“Good,” she says again.
And that’s it. That’s the last clean moment we get. Because the second the word leaves her mouth, something in me snaps. Not loud. Not dramatic.
Just final.
I pull her into me.
Her hands come up between us on instinct, like she’s going to push me back, and for half a second I think she might.
Then she doesn’t. Then her fingers catch in my shirt instead. And that’s all it takes.
The rest of it happens fast. Too fast for thought. Too fast for sense.
My mouth finds hers like it’s been waiting for this exact moment since the last time I made this mistake, and this time there’s nothing soft about it.
No hesitation. No careful testing. Just years of tension breaking loose all at once.
She kisses me back just as hard.
That’s what does it. That’s what takes this from bad decision to no turning back. Because there’s no uncertainty in her.
No confusion.
She meets me right there, heat for heat, breath for breath, like she’s just as done pretending as I am.
My hands move before I think about where they land. Her waist. Her back. The line of her side that’s still warm from the stage lights. Every inch of her under my hands feels real in a way that hits harder than it should.
Because I’ve imagined this. More than once. More than I’d ever admit. And reality is worse.
Better.
More dangerous. Because now I know. Now I know exactly what it feels like to have her this close again, and whatever part of me thought I could keep pretending this didn’t matter is officially dead.
She makes a small sound against my mouth, something soft and breathless that goes straight through me, and I lose whatever’s left of control I had.
This is a mistake.
I know it. I know exactly how bad this is. I know Landon is somewhere in this building. I know what this looks like. I know what this means.
None of it matters. Not enough to stop. Not anymore.
Because once we cross this line again, there is no going back to pretending. No resetting. No stepping away and acting like it didn’t happen.
This is it.
This is the moment everything changes.
Her hands slide up into my hair, and the world narrows down to that and the heat of her body against mine and the fact that I don’t remember the last time I wanted something this badly and this recklessly at the same time.
Time loses shape.
I grab a condom from my wallet, rolling it over myself and when i look back her panties are on the floor and her skirt is at her waist.
I pick her back up by her ass sinking myself into her in one motion.
I’m pumping into her so wildly, like I'm possessed, under a spell, under her spell. Her teeth bite down on my neck as my hand drops to her clit. I need her to come because after all these years I’m only a second away.
She screams as I press down rubbing circles on her most sensitive part.
She clenches around me and I follow her, my forehead resting in the crook of her shoulder.
I don’t know how long we stay like that. Seconds. Minutes.
Long enough that the adrenaline burns through and something deeper settles in under it. Long enough that the edge shifts.
And then something changes. It’s small at first. Subtle. But I feel it.
The way her body tenses. The way her breath stutters differently. The way her grip tightens, not in response, but in hesitation.
I pull back just enough to look at her.
Her eyes are wide. Not scared.Not exactly. But not the same as they were a second ago.
“Hey,” I say, my voice rough but slower now. “You good?”
She nods too quickly. “Yeah.”
It’s automatic. Too automatic. Something in my gut twists.
I’ve been around enough women, enough situations, enough bad decisions to know when something isn’t lining up the way it should.
And suddenly everything clicks into place in the worst possible way.
The tension. The hesitation. The way she went still for half a second before pushing forward anyway.
My stomach drops. “Allie,” I say, quieter now. “Wait.”
She freezes. Really freezes this time.Not reactive. Not fighting.
Just still.
And that’s when it hits me.
Hard.
Clear.
Final.
“Have you—” I stop.
Because I already know the answer. Because the look on her face tells me everything I need to know before she says a word. Because the realization crashes through everything else in my head and leaves nothing but cold, hard clarity behind.
She hasn’t.
Jesus Christ.
I drop my forehead to hers for a second, breathing hard, my hands still on her like I don’t know whether to hold on or let go.
“Fuck,” I mutter under my breath.
Everything that just felt inevitable a second ago now feels like a line I should’ve seen coming from a mile away.
And didn’t.
Because I wasn’t thinking. Because I didn’t stop. Because I wanted her too much to ask the questions I should’ve asked before any of this happened.
My chest tightens. Not with anger this time. With something worse. Because this isn’t just a mistake anymore.
This is something I can’t undo. And I knew better.
I knew better.
I just didn’t act like it.