Chapter 22
22
I was both relieved and terrified that Henry had decided to accept my offer. My legs were weak as we backtracked a few steps away from the tree line and lowered to our knees. With trembling hands, I took off the Tear, then my cloak, and put both on the ground beside me. I hesitated when my fingers brushed the locket holding the picture of my mother.
Henry didn’t rush me, but his intent gaze was on me, tracking my every movement. His expression was wary as if he were waiting for me to change my mind. Taking a steadying breath, I reached behind my neck and unclasped the delicate chain, catching the locket in my hand when it glided down my chest. My emotions were conflicting. I felt like I was betraying my mother by taking off the locket so Henry could…feed. A shudder of trepidation rolled through me at the thought, and the Lord noticed.
“You don’t have to do this,” he managed to say, but he sounded weak, and the wound on his chest was still gnarly and bleeding. I would think it should have begun healing by now. Henry’s breathing was labored, reinforcing my belief that he was in dire need of blood.
“You need to feed,” was all I said.
I needed Henry’s protection in the Black Forest, but a part of me also felt indebted to him for saving my life. Letting him feed from me was my way of repaying him.
We stared at each other in silence for a few minutes, and Henry’s features were impossible to read. He was so eerily still that when he finally moved toward me, I instinctively jerked away.
“Sorry,” I muttered, willing myself to sit still.
His lashes swept down, shielding his eyes as his jaw tightened. For a moment, I thought he might pull away, changing his mind, but then his gaze dropped to my neck. His face became sharper, and I could now see the all-consuming hunger in his eyes. His lips parted slightly, revealing the hints of his fangs.
My heart was pounding in my chest as he reached for me. Wrapping my braid around his fist, he gently tugged on it to move my head to the side.
“Are you sure?” he whispered, his cool breath caressing my exposed neck, making me shiver.
“Yes,” I barely breathed before he struck.
I clenched my teeth through the burning pain when his fangs pierced my skin. My fingers curled inward to form a fist around the locket I was holding, nails digging into the palm of my hand. I held on to it as if it were a lifeline to my mother and everything I believed and stood for.
The discomfort of the bite was brief and was quickly replaced by something else entirely. The sensation flared to life in tiny sparks, growing in intensity the longer Henry’s mouth remained sealed to my neck. Soon, I felt every deep, hungry pull in the space between my thighs, in my very core.
Henry’s arm came around my waist to bring me flush with his hard chest. I gripped his shoulders…to pull him closer or to push him away…in that moment, I wasn’t sure as I was lost in the sensation of his mouth tugging on my throat. A moan escaped me, and when it did, Henry ripped his mouth from my neck and backed away. Breathing shallowly, he stared at me with wide eyes. His lips were smeared with my blood, and I had to fight the sudden urge to kiss them, to taste myself on his tongue. Scowling, I lifted my trembling hand and pressed it to my neck.
Henry closed his eyes, running his tongue over his lips as his breathing became more even.
“You can have some of my blood to heal the bite marks,” he offered, opening his eyes again.
I shook my head, not trusting myself to take him up on his offer. The wounds his fangs had inflicted stung, but I felt sparks of desire slowly flickering out, and I didn’t want to reinforce them by ingesting his blood. We stared at each other for a moment longer until I swallowed and averted my gaze. I was stunned by the intensity of what I’d just experienced. Pulling my hand away from my neck, I looked down at my fingers, sticky and red with my blood. Only then did I notice the locket I’d dropped on the ground. Suddenly, I was desperate to put it back on as if it would ward me against everything I was feeling and bring me back to myself.
My fingers were numb as I clasped the chain behind my neck, letting the locket settle on my chest. I felt better the moment I put it on, but then I noticed it was smeared with my blood. My eyes pricked with tears as I quickly cleaned the blood off the best I could. My frown deepened as I stared at the locket, feeling like I’d forever tarnished it somehow. An ugly emotion similar to the one I’d experienced on the night of the Vassal Ball rose up, filling me with shame. I felt like a traitor again, and this time, the feeling was ten times stronger, threatening to pull me under before crushing me under its weight.
“Are you okay?” Henry asked when a shuddering breath left me.
I nodded as he carefully wrapped my cloak around my shoulders, fastening it below my throat. It did nothing to protect me from the chill that flared in my chest. A tremor coursed through me as the cold feeling spread through my entire body, coating my insides with ice.
I couldn’t bring myself to look at Henry as he hung the amulet around my neck. It was hard to will my numb limbs to move when he offered his hand after swiftly rising to his feet. I placed my hand in his, and when he pulled me up, my knees buckled, and I almost went down again. He caught me with his arm around my waist, hauling me to his hard chest. My breath hitched as my gaze dropped to his red-stained lips. I forced my eyes up and found Henry watching me with a concerned look on his face.
“I might have taken too much,” he muttered, but there was no mistaking the hunger I still saw in his eyes as they darted to the two bite marks on my neck.
“I’m fine,” I assured him as I pulled away and looked at his chest.
A breath of relief left me when I saw the wound was beginning to heal.
“We need to find shelter before sunrise,” Henry said, looking up at the night sky before lowering his gaze to me. “Can you walk, or do you need me to carry you?”
“I can walk,” I said quickly. I didn’t want to be in his arms again when my skin still hummed from the effects of him feeding from me.
He eyed me for a moment as if he didn’t trust I was okay, and something akin to remorse flickered across his features.
“Where are we going to find shelter?” I asked, trying to distract myself from the cold feeling inside me.
“I remember this area of the Forest,” Henry said, still looking at me with worry in his eyes that were gradually turning from black to deep blue. “There was a White Witches settlement here during the Red War. I’m hoping some of the cabins are still standing so we can stay there until sundown.”
“Lead the way,” I said, turning toward the woods.
Henry nodded but didn’t move in front of me to lead the way. Instead, he gently placed a hand on my back to steer me in the direction he wanted to go before falling in step behind me. I held my breath as we entered the woods, only letting it out slowly when nothing jumped out at us to try and tear us apart. Dark, twisted shadows moved all around us, slithering through the trees with low hisses and occasional screeches and wails.
“We are surrounded by predators,” I whispered as Henry and I slowly made our way through the forest. “Why aren’t they attacking?”
“Because I am the biggest predator in here,” the Lord said low.
He was the biggest predator, and I’d just let him feed from me. Willingly. A shudder rolled through me, and I felt Henry’s fingers flex on my back.
“It’s normal, you know,” he said, keeping us moving deeper into the woods.
“What is?” I glanced at him.
He swallowed, his throat bobbing, but didn’t meet my gaze.
“What you felt when I was feeding from you.”
A flashback of his mouth on my neck instantly filled my mind, and I stumbled, nearly falling. Henry caught me, and I was in his arms again.
“Your body reacts that way to provide a false sense of security. It doesn’t mean anything,” he said, staring down at me.
“Okay.” I scowled, stepping away from him.
I’d preferred it if he hadn’t acknowledged how my body had reacted to him.
“How did you find me?” I asked him, resuming walking.
I didn’t know where I was going, but I needed to keep moving, if only to avoid the uncomfortable conversation. Henry immediately fell in step next to me, for which I was grateful because I could feel dozens of eyes watching me from the darkness of the forest. My chest filled with dread when I thought about what would have happened if Henry hadn’t found me when he had.
“I followed your scent…and Wren’s,” Henry replied, frowning.
“He followed us to the Stern Estate,” I explained. “After we got separated, he knocked me out and brought me to the Black Forest.”
Henry snarled with rage.
“Did he hurt you?” he demanded, grasping my elbow to stop me in my tracks.
“No,” I said low, facing him. “I hurt him . I stabbed him with my dagger and escaped.”
“Good,” Henry growled in approval. His eyes shone with admiration as he stared at me. “Why did he bring you here?” he asked, his voice returning to normal as he regained his composure.
I swallowed, trying to decide how much information I wanted to divulge to the Lord.
“He is working for the Dark Witches. They sent him to New Haven to retrieve the amulet.”
“And you?” Henry asked, and I grimaced. I should have known better than to hope he wouldn’t pick up on that.
“He said the witches think my blood activates the amulet,” I admitted.
“Because you’re part White Witch?” the Lord asked.
“How did you know?” I breathed as my eyes widened in shock.
“I could taste it in your blood,” he explained, swallowing thickly.
I stared at him in disbelief.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I only knew your blood tasted different. I didn’t know why. I’d never tasted a White Witch’s blood, so I wasn’t sure what it was.”
“Do you think my mother was a White Witch?” I asked him as we continued walking.
“It would make sense. If Vincent had fed from her when she was his vassal, he would have been able to tell. That would explain why they worked together, looking for the amulet. Unless…” he trailed off. When I glanced at him, he seemed to be lost in thought. “Unless your mother wasn’t looking for the amulet,” he finally said. “Perhaps she made it.”
I nodded because I was wondering the same thing. Especially if the “power of three” meant the power of three generations of White Witches.
“That would explain why it’s my blood that activates the amulet,” I mused, my eyes trained on the dark forest floor.
“Do you want to activate it now?” Henry asked, glancing at the Tear on my chest.
“No.” I shook my head, carefully stepping over thick, gnarled roots protruding from the ground.
Something that Wren had said earlier had stuck with me. I didn’t know how the amulet worked. I didn’t want to risk killing Henry and being left in the Black Forest without his protection. Would the amulet also wipe out all the supernatural creatures lurking in the woods? I didn’t have the answer to that, and I didn’t want to make the wrong move. There were too many unknowns.
“We don’t know how the amulet works. I want to get out of the Forest and return to New Haven before we attempt to activate it,” I explained, hoping Henry wouldn’t push the issue.
Thankfully, he agreed with my line of thinking.
“We will spend the day in the Forest and then head back to New Haven at sundown,” he said, and I nodded.
We walked for a while, and I was beginning to worry we wouldn’t find a shelter in time, but that was when we came across another clearing. A cabin sat there, old and decrepit but still intact. Henry walked in first to make sure it was safe, but I followed close behind, refusing to leave the Lord’s side and remain outside, surrounded by creatures that all wanted a bite of me.
The soft light of the moon streaming through the broken windows illuminated the small space as we moved through it. Thick spiderwebs covered all the surfaces, blanketing the place in gauzy white, and I could hear small rodents scurry around as I followed Henry to one of the rooms in the back of the house.
“I need to borrow your cloak,” the Lord said, stepping into the small space and looking around.
I didn’t feel as chilled anymore because the ice coating my insides was beginning to thaw, so I didn’t mind parting with the cloak. When I unfastened it from below my throat and handed it to Henry, he hung it over the single small window, plunging the room into total darkness.
Momentarily disoriented, I just stood there, waiting for my eyes to adjust. Henry brushed my arm, and I jerked, not expecting his touch.
“We can sit down there,” he said quietly, gently grabbing my arm and leading me to the right.
I was beginning to make out the objects in the room and realized we’d walked to the wall farthest away from the window. Henry lowered to the floor, resting his back against the wall and stretching his long legs out in front of him. With a heavy sigh, I assumed the same position next to him, hoping rodents would stay away from the Lord and, by extension, me, just like the creatures in the woods had done earlier.
“What happened at the Stern Estate?” I asked Henry, now able to make out his features in the darkness.
He rested his head against the wall, his eyes closed and his mouth a firm line.
“I did what I had to do,” he said low.
He killed them all, I thought to myself, studying his face with wide eyes.
“How many were there?” I whispered.
“About a dozen or so.” He sounded sad, like what he’d done weighed heavily on him.
My chest was tight as I faced forward, sitting silently for a few minutes. There was no doubt in my mind those Ravagers had to be killed, but my heart broke for Henry because of what he’d had to do. I wondered if he was going to add their lives to the list of the ones he was trying to atone for.
“Why didn’t you take me as your vassal when I turned eighteen?” I asked suddenly, surprising myself. I’d wondered that for a while, and now seemed as good a time as any to ask that question.
Henry didn’t say anything for a long time, making me wonder if he’d fallen asleep. My eyes began to drift close when he finally spoke, breaking the silence, “You didn’t want me to take you.”
My eyes flew open at his words.
“Not everyone wants to be taken. Yet, the clans take them anyway,” I pointed out.
“You were grieving. Your misery was palpable. I had just lost my father, so I knew what you were going through. I was not about to tear you away from your father and the life that you knew.”
His words rendered me speechless as my mind flashed back to our conversation on the night of the Selection.
“A vampire with a conscience? Am I supposed to believe that?” I’d scoffed then.
“You can believe whatever you want,” he’d replied.
Right now, that notion wasn’t so hard to believe. I felt a pang in my chest at the thought that I was planning to kill him.
“But when you came back the following year and so obviously wanted to be selected,” Henry continued. “I was curious…and suspicious. I wondered what reason you might have for coming back. I knew Vincent had gone to the Dark Witches to try and save your mother. I hoped if I selected you, you would help shed light on my father’s disappearance.”
“Do you think Vincent is really dead?”
I didn’t know why I’d asked that question. I’d seen firsthand what the Dark Witches were capable of, and Vincent had gone to face them alone. I doubted that, even as a vampire, he could have survived, but a tiny part of me still wondered if there was a chance, if ever so small. Perhaps I only wished there was a chance because I wanted the burden of his death off my shoulders. The burden of the lie I’d told that cost Henry his father.
“There is no doubt in my mind that he’s dead,” Henry rasped. “I just pray his death was swift.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, turning my head to look at him. “I truly am.”
Henry met my gaze in the darkness.
“Thank you,” he said low. “And thank you for letting me feed from you.”
“Thank you for saving my life.” I’d spoken the words softly as if my hushed tone would change the fact that one of my worst enemies had saved my life…thrice if I counted the Ravager attack.
A faint smile curved Henry’s lips.
“Let’s not make it a habit, okay?”
“Okay.” I smiled back.
The Lord closed his eyes and rested his head against the wall.
“Try to get some sleep. I won’t let anything happen to you,” he murmured.
For the first time, I believed him, feeling safe next to him as exhaustion pulled me under, and I drifted off to sleep.