November 10 #2
He hung up, watching Jasmin as she disappeared into the store.
He was expecting another call right about now.
This time from his sister. Jordan and Max couldn’t handle emotional situations very well.
They weren’t the best at offering comfort, though Max was a lot better than Jordan.
Today was an emotional day for him. It was his first birthday in fifteen years without Perry.
Kevin was glad that he wasn’t at home because today would have been unbearable.
He would have sat staring out the window for hours, waiting for his best friend to come by, wondering what sentimental shit he would have done this year.
His siblings knew how he felt and it was obvious that they were trying to avoid him. But the day was almost over and Max’s call proved that they couldn’t avoid him much longer. They’d probably had a bet as to who would call first, a bet that Max had obviously lost.
He stared at his phone, waiting. “And three…two…” His phone rang and Jordan’s number flashed on his screen. They were so predictable. He smiled to himself and answered. “Let me guess. You beat Max this time.”
“What are you talking about?” she replied, feigning shock. “I didn’t even talk to Max.”
“Very clever wording, Jo, but I see right through you. It’s been my birthday the whole day and you call me at night…directly after Max…so there was at least a text involved. Next time don’t make it so obvious.”
He heard a slight giggle. “We’ll try harder to keep you in the dark next time. But anyway, happy birthday, Bink.”
He hated that nickname, but she insisted on using it, always telling him that he was the only one in the family who didn’t have a stupid middle name, so he deserved it. “Thanks.”
“When mom called me earlier, she said you’re not at home. Everything okay?”
Kevin sighed. Why was his mother telling everyone in the whole goddamn family? He kept his response short this time, not wanting to rehash it all over again. “I’m driving down to Florida. There’s something I need to do.”
“You’re going all that way by yourself?”
“No. I’m…I’m with…someone.” He was scarce on the details with her, because, unlike Max, Jordan would keep questioning until he snapped. It was the reason why she had nineteen nails in her log and Max had none. Max knew when to back off.
Jasmin was only a few feet away now and he hoped that she would just walk quietly back into the room, because if Jordan heard her, there would be more questions.
But…it was Jasmin. She didn’t do quiet. “See? I’m back,” she announced like it wasn’t obvious. “That walk across the parking lot was very scary, but I made it back in one piece. And all on my own. Admit it. You’re proud.”
He rolled his eyes. “You’re a jackass.”
“What?” Jordan asked, sounding confused.
“Not you, Jo.”
“Thanks for waiting outside for me, Kevin.”
“I wasn’t waiting for you. Now if you don’t mind, I’m on the phone.”
She walked back inside without another word and closed the door.
“Fuck, she’s so goddamn annoying!” Kevin said.
“What’s her name?”
He tried not to groan at the commencement of her questioning. “Jazz…Jasmin.”
“That’s a pretty name. Is she pretty?”
More questions, but he took some time to answer this one, trying to think of the right words.
There wasn’t a simple way to describe Jasmin, but simple words were all he had.
“She’s beautiful…” he whispered, “…in the most unconventional way…I just wish she’d shut up once in a while.
” He opened the door and walked back inside, changing the topic of conversation to put an end to the interrogation. “So I hear you got a boyfriend.”
“Where’d you hear that?” she asked, a bit surprised. “Mom?”
“Nope.”
“Shane?”
He didn’t want to reveal that Kay was actually his secret source. “Just answer the question, Jo.”
“Yes. I have a boyfriend and he’s great.” She sounded like a lovesick puppy. Tyler must be really something to get his snarky sister all girly like that. He wasn’t fully convinced, though. Her track record with men hadn’t been the greatest.
“Well, when you’ve been with the likes of Billy Mason and that douche, anyone else is—” He stopped, stunned into silence by the sight before him.
“Bink? You there?”
“Jazz…” Her name caught in his throat. “What are you…uh…Jo-jo, I gotta go.”
“Wait, Bink. What’s—”
He hung up and walked across the small room to Jasmin. She was sitting cross-legged on the floor with two small tubs of vanilla ice cream in front of her. However, one of them was topped with five lit candles.
“What’s this?” he asked, sitting down beside her.
“It’s your birthday, right?”
“How do you know it’s my birthday?”
“Your phone has been ringing off the hook today. I already knew you were a Scorpio, so it was easy to figure out. And I also figured out that you have four siblings. Three brothers and a sister. Shane called in the car, then there was Dom, Max and…Jo-jo?”
It was pointless trying to keep his personal life a complete secret. “It’s Jordan,” he corrected, “but all of us call her Jo-jo.”
“It must be nice…having a big family, so many people who care about you.”
She looked at him with so much longing, he didn’t have the heart to tell her that he took them for granted every day. “It’s great.”
She accepted his short response and didn’t push for more information. Instead, she slid the ice cream towards him. “Well, make a wish and blow out your candles.”
He’d never believed in that tradition, and a wish wouldn’t undo the past, so he just blew out the candles.
She reached behind her for a bottle of chocolate sauce and somehow seeing it took him back to his birthday three years ago.
The contrast was astonishing. His eighteen-year old self was excited about life, about the future.
The possibility to do great things was right at his fingertips.
He’d never been diligent in high school.
His siblings were all nerds and he’d tried his best to rebel against it.
However, the family gene finally caught up with him in college and Perry’s little speech had been the source of more motivation.
He’d worked damn hard, not just for the promise of money and success; he genuinely loved what he was studying and he’d pushed himself to do better, be better.
But now his twenty-one-year old self was a college dropout drowning in guilt, a bum going nowhere.
Money, success—it meant nothing to him now.
He didn’t even deserve to wear the chain anymore, but he couldn’t bring himself to take it off.
Possibility had been replaced with emptiness.
Perry had told him to forget about Hope, and in the last three months he’d used that advice in an entirely different context.
He knew at that moment that he would never feel whole again.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
He slowly shook his head. Filled with so much disappointment, he couldn’t even find the will to lie. “No.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
“No,” he whispered. “This is…Thank you, Jazz.”
A wide smile lit up her face and she handed him the chocolate sauce. “You’re welcome.”
It took less than a minute before she reached over and dipped her spoon into his tub. “Really?” he asked. “We’re eating the same thing.”
“Yours has more chocolate sauce. Also, it felt like I was in a parallel universe. I thought you were being…nice and my brain couldn’t comprehend that, so I decided to bug you to restore some sense of normality.”
He laughed and it was something he didn’t think would happen today.
This girl. This crazy, thoughtful, annoying girl.
She took the little she knew about him and turned it into a gift.
He was trying to push her back, keep her at a distance, but she wouldn’t take a hint.
He could feel it; slow and stealthy, she was getting under his skin.
They fought all the time, but every now and then they had a moment like this, a moment where he completely forgot about the pain of the past and just submersed himself in the present.
These moments were rare and fleeting, like a shooting star.
And just like a shooting star, it showed him the wonderment of possibility again.