Chapter 30 Madison
Chapter thirty
Madison
September
The past two-and-a-half months have been a whirlwind in every sense of the word.
The town is excitedly planning for the biggest and best Christmas Fest ever.
Liam and Beau have been overseeing the installation of the freeze-dried food production line while hitting all their goals on the original line.
More and more people are milling around the town with the new jobs at the factory, resulting in new restaurants and retail stores opening.
There’s even a new apartment complex going up on the edge of town, offering more housing options for the many people wanting to move to Noel.
It’s a shocking turnaround that Noel can’t keep up with the housing demand when, just a couple years ago, families were fleeing the small town.
Liam and I have continued spending every available second together, caught up in the whirlwind of our romance. We’ve stuck with all of our relationship rules—even Liam’s promise to keep talking to me. That doesn’t mean we haven’t spent plenty of time making out by our Christmas tree, though.
Unfortunately, the only thing that hasn’t been a whirlwind is Madison Joy Editorial. It’s been more of a gentle breeze. Occasional gusts of wind are tempered by weeks with zero wind whatsoever.
I’d been so hopeful that Elizabeth’s endorsement would open the floodgates to new clients knocking down my door and overflowing my schedule.
Instead, I’ve started taking on more and more shifts at Becky’s just to cover my insurance and tuck a little into savings.
I’d really like to not dip into my emergency savings.
The only reason I’ve managed to squeak by financially is because I’m not paying rent on the house I share with Liam.
But there’s an expiration date to the free room and board, and it’s looming ever closer.
As the first leaves drain of chlorophyll and fade from green to yellow, my confidence similarly drains.
This was a pipe dream that was never going to work.
Either I’m going to become a full-time barista, or I need to apply for jobs at some of the other print marketing agencies in KC.
I made a mistake thinking I could make this work.
I haven’t really told Liam about the slow drip of business that MJE is generating. I’m doing everything I can possibly think of to generate more buzz and more clients, but I know that if I tell him, he’s just going to push me to do even more.
And I don’t really want to admit to him that I’m failing. I don’t want to be one of the failing businesses he steps in to save.
So I’m secretly spending more time working at Becky’s without him knowing.
I’m certainly not admitting to my parents that my business venture is failing—they vocalized enough of their doubts over Fourth of July to last a full year.
I was able to keep my sister, Caitlin, focused on my relationship with Liam enough to keep her from asking any career-related questions.
Clara has become the sole confidante to my failed entrepreneurship venture, but I’m not even giving her the full picture of my self-doubt.
I’m currently reclining on the couch, reMarkable tablet in hand, proofreading the latest manuscript I received.
It’s a novella, which is never my preferred form of book, but I’m taking anything I can get at this point.
Hamlet has been contentedly sleeping under the Christmas tree, but he suddenly trots over and jumps onto my stomach.
Meow.
He settles in, curling his paws under him as he lies down on my chest, his face inches away from mine.
Meow.
“What? Am I that obviously pitiful?” I ask.
Meow.
I set the tablet down so I can scratch behind his ears, generating a thrumming purr.
“Maybe I am that pitiful,” I muse aloud. I’m surprised when a tear slips down my cheek, which Hamlet leans forward to sniff. I wrap my arms around him as sudden sobs unleash.
“I don’t even know why I’m crying, Hammie!
” I exclaim. “I mean, clearly, the fact that I’m a complete failure as an independent editor is embarrassing.
Having to admit to my parents that I made the wrong decision going out on my own isn’t going to feel good.
I suppose there’s also the fact that I think I’m in love with your hot daddy, but we don’t have a clear plan for a long-term future together because neither of us wants to admit that we don’t know what to do. ”
Hamlet’s next meow comes out a little strangled, and I realize I’m maybe holding him a little too tightly. “Sorry, Hammie. I guess I know exactly why I’m crying. I just don’t know how to fix any of it.”
Sitting up, I wipe the tears from my eyes, and my gaze lands on the Christmas tree. My gaze turns into a glare. “I thought Clara’s Christmas magic was supposed to make everything work out. You’re broken, Christmas,” I yell at the tree.
I stand up and unplug the lights.
I’ve managed to bottle up my emotions by the time Liam comes home from work.
I’m standing at the stove making egg fried rice when he comes up behind me, wraps his arms around my waist, and gently kisses my neck.
Something about the sweetness of the gesture stings my eyes with tears again, and I scramble to cork them into the bottle before he sees.
“Hey there, love,” he murmurs. “Don’t let me distract you,” he adds as he gathers my hair to one side, giving his lips easier access to my neck.
I sigh and lean my head back. “You’re going to burn our dinner, Suits,” I half-heartedly admonish.
“Worth it,” he replies, grinning against my neck. But he releases me and scoops up a mewling Hamlet to give him a dose of attention while I finish the rice. Liam grabs two plates from the cabinet for me and then feeds Hamlet his dinner.
As we eat, Liam asks about the project I was working on today, and I try to make it sound more substantial than it actually is.
He updates me on all the progress at the factory, expressing gratitude for Beau’s help through everything.
“Having Amanda move into the HR position has been a game changer,” he says.
“With all the new employees we’re onboarding for this freeze-dried line, I’m so glad I’m not the one drowning in all of that paperwork. ”
Hamlet has finished eating and jumps onto Liam’s lap, meowing softly. Liam clears his throat before saying, “Hey, I kinda have a favor to ask you.”
I set down my spoon. In the time we’ve known each other, I can count on one hand the number of times Liam has asked for help with anything. Actually, I wouldn’t even need all of the fingers on one hand.
“So, I told you about how I haven’t been back to London for Chuseok in several years,” he begins.
“And even though my grandma is totally fine after her procedure, it still got me thinking that I should visit them soon. My parents will be going back for Chuseok, and I was thinking about joining them.” He pauses, scratching Hamlet’s chest.
“I’ve never trusted anyone enough to take care of Hamlet if I was gone for multiple days in a row.
Never had someone I thought Hamlet would trust enough to take care of him,” he says, eyes sliding up to find mine.
“But now we have you. So I wanted to ask if you’d be willing to watch Hamlet for a few days if I fly to London at the beginning of October? ”
The bottle of emotions is about to go full Mentos-dropped-in-Coca-Cola with the way Liam is looking at me with so much vulnerable trust in his eyes.
“Of course, I will,” I say. “I’m glad that you’re going to spend some time with your family.”
“About that,” he adds, “now that I’ve suckered you into letting me leave town, I should add that my parents want to drive here to Noel and then fly out of Joplin together. Because they’d like to meet you.”
Liam’s voice sounds like he’s walking on eggshells, like he’s afraid of the words coming out of his own mouth.
As I watch his face, his hand nervously stroking Hamlet’s back, I realize how vulnerable this possibility is for him.
For me to meet his parents. For them to meet me. For it to happen here in Noel.
I stand and step next to Liam’s chair, cupping his face in my hands. “Liam, I would love to meet your parents,” I say before leaning down to kiss him.
Liam gently sets Hamlet on the floor with one hand and pulls me to sit sideways on his lap with the other hand, all without breaking our kiss.
When he draws back, he leans his forehead against mine.
“Thanks, MJ.” He reaches up to tuck my hair behind my ear and says, “There’s one more thing I’ve been thinking about.
May as well get it all out there at once. ”
I lean back, brows furrowed. “What?”
Liam exhales a long breath before he says, “I’ve been giving some thought to the possibility of staying in Noel.”
My mind stumbles over his words, puzzle pieces that aren’t fitting together. “Like, living in Noel? Staying, staying?”
He nods. “Have I gone insane?” he asks, his voice a whisper.
I can’t help but laugh. “To be determined,” I say. My heart is leaping at the thought that Liam could be staying here permanently—even though I haven’t determined if I can stay here permanently.
Liam’s presence would be a strong argument in favor of staying, though.
“What’s made you go from judging Noel as a backwoods Arkansas small town to considering it as your permanent residence?” I ask, eyebrow quirked.
Liam sighs, his head falling back. “I don’t know.
A hundred little things. I think it started way back when I brought Beau into the loop about what had been happening at the factory.
It was the first time that one of the screwed-up situations I’ve straightened out felt personal.
Like it was more than just restoring a pet food production facility to order—it was about keeping a community intact. ”
I make an affirming hum, nodding in understanding as he continues, “And then there was the whole Christmas in July deal. Seeing the way the town embraced me during the brainstorm session. I don’t think I’ve ever used the term ‘endearing’ in my entire life, but the whole experience was endearing.
It made me appreciate this town as much as they showed appreciation for me in that moment. ”
Liam pauses, looking especially reflective before he goes on.
“You know I went on that fishing trip with the guys a couple of weeks ago,” he says, and I nod.
He came back low-key beaming, gushing about the good times they’d had and the fish they’d caught.
Well, “gushing,” as far as the term could apply to Liam’s demeanor.
He says, “When we were sitting around the campfire that final night, I had this moment where I realized I felt disappointed when I thought about leaving Noel. For the first time, I felt like I had people I didn’t want to leave behind—friends I didn’t want to leave behind. ”
Liam looks up at me with a wry smile. “Of course, in the midst of all the small factors adding up, there’s this one big factor wrapped up in a tiny, feisty package,” he teases, tickling my side. I squirm until he stops, but then I bring a hand up to trace his jaw with my fingers.
“What would you do? How would that work with your job?” I ask.
He frowns. “That’s the one thing giving me pause.
I know that Holden would never let me continue my current position if I wasn’t based out of Houston.
Plus, it would be back to traveling to new places for weeks or months at a time.
This is by far the longest I’ve ever stayed at one location—and that’s just because it was a legal mess on top of a corporate mess.
And Beau and I managed to extend my time with the addition of the new production line. ”
Liam’s brow furrows, and I trace the lines across his forehead. “So?” I prod.
He sighs. “I guess I could apply to become the permanent plant manager. Shift my employment from Holden to Pure Fur All. Just stay and keep things running.”
Now my brow furrows. “Would you be happy doing that? I mean, I know you could do it on a backstroke. But standing around keeping a well-oiled machine running doesn’t strike me as the type of challenge you’d appreciate. Or something worthy of your skill set.”
Liam sighs again, deeper, longer. Like his very soul is breathing out an exhausted groan.
He closes his eyes before he answers. “I don’t know.
Probably not. But if that’s what it would take to stay here, then maybe I could live with it.
” His eyes open again, locking on mine. “I know we said we would figure things out as we go, but I don’t think I want to go anymore.
I want to stay. Because I . . .” He pauses, swallowing hard, and I sense what’s coming. “Because I love you, Madison.”
I should tell him that I’m failing. That the dream of Madison Joy Editorial is probably on the downhill slope to utter demise. That I might have to explore other options for employment. That I’m not the relentless girl he thinks he fell in love with.
I should tell him.
Instead, I whisper, “I love you too, Suits.”
I lean in and kiss him.