Chapter twenty-two
“How are things going with you and Juan? And Zoe?” Daphne asked, keeping her voice low. Amber had put Zoe to bed an hour ago and Clara and Adrian followed thirty minutes after. They were mostly, but not entirely, alone in the lodge room.
She flickered a glance toward the pool table in the corner, not that Spencer would be there.
He’d excused himself to check on a project in the garage before she’d taken Zoe to bed.
He whispered that he’d come to her tonight, but she sensed he needed a little time.
The thought had caused a thread of anxiety to twist inside her as she watched him walk away, and she had to remind herself to trust him.
Trust them. He hadn’t said the things he’d said, or shared what he’d shared with her, on a whim.
He trusted her with his past, with his pain, with his heart, with his future. She needed to do the same for him.
“It’s a lot,” she admitted, the sound of a cue hitting a ball echoing softly across the room.
Most of the Falcons and their partners had gone home or to their rooms. Only Lovell and Superman were left.
Superman would probably be in his room as well if Lovell wasn’t hanging around waiting for Daphne.
“Do you want to head home?” she asked her friend.
Daphne made a face. “I want to take a few quiet minutes to talk with my friend,” she replied. “How are you? Really?”
Her eyes dropped to the mug of tea she held. “Terrified something is going to go wrong and I’m going to lose Zoe. Ecstatic to be reunited with her at all. Cautiously optimistic about things with Spencer. At a loss as to what to do about my new job that I’m supposed to start in a few weeks.”
“You won’t lose Zoe,” Daphne said.
Amber bobbed her head. “I know it’s unlikely. The lawyer Michael recommended reminded me of a shark scenting blood. He’s not going to let Anthony within a state’s distance of Zoe. But the fear is still there.”
“It won’t come to this, but if, by chance, it doesn’t look like it’s going the way it should, I have friends who can help fix that.”
Amber lifted her gaze and stared at Daphne. “Please tell me you aren’t talking about hit men?” She paused, then added, “I reserve the right to come back to you on that, though.”
Daphne smiled. “I’m talking about people who can help you disappear. Not what you want. Not what any of us want, especially not Juan, but as a last resort, know you have it in your pocket.”
The most unusual thing about Daphne’s statement was that it wasn’t unusual. Not considering the group of people Amber now called friends. She was officially someone who knew people who knew people who could help her and Zoe disappear. Forever if needed.
“I don’t want it to come to that,” she said. “But thank you.”
Daphne nodded. “Like I said, it won’t. But losing Zoe isn’t something you need to worry about. I know you probably will. Hell, we’ll all breathe easier when this is over and the dust has settled. But it will settle. Now what about Juan?”
“My ex might be helping people kill family members and the child I thought I’d lost is alive and you’re asking about my sex life?” Amber said, although a laugh escaped as she spoke. Because of course, Daphne would ask about Spencer. It wasn’t in her DNA to let that subject drop.
“So there is a sex life?” Daphne asked, wiggling her eyebrows.
Heat climbed up Amber’s neck. She cleared her throat and took a sip of tea before nodding. “Yes, there’s a sex life. But it’s more than that.”
Daphne’s smile widened. “Of course it’s more than that. Even I noticed how he watches you. How he looks out for you. Noticed it the first time I saw the two of you in the same room.”
Amber rolled her eyes. “I like how you say ‘even I noticed’ as if you don’t notice every tiny little detail. You probably know how many balls are left on the pool table right now even though you haven’t glanced over there once.”
“Seven,” she replied, following it with a wry chuckle. “Hazard of being a writer. I notice things.”
“We’ve had this conversation. You’ve always noticed things. I think you became a writer as a way to put stories around the things you notice. I don’t think being a writer made you more observant.”
Daphne wagged her head. “Maybe, but enough about me. Are you happy?”
“With Spencer? Yes. I trust him. I trust myself with him. It feels right, but it’s new.” She hesitated. “I don’t know what all that means when it comes to my new job and Zoe, though.”
“What do you want it to mean?”
She’d always wanted a family, meaningful work, and a community she belonged to.
Anthony had done his damnedest to take any chance of that away.
She’d almost let him. Now, all three had dropped into her life.
To say she was grateful beyond measure was an understatement, and she wouldn’t change a thing, but she wasn’t quite sure how to handle it all.
“Can’t I just have it all?” she replied with a rueful grin.
Daphne scoffed. “That’s a myth and we both know it.
You can have it all, just not at the same time.
That’s not to say you can’t be a mom, a partner, and have a job, but you will have to make choices.
You will have to prioritize and be okay with those choices.
Those priorities can change over time, but that kind of chaos is now a part of your life. ”
“And I can fight it or I can welcome it,” Amber said, more to herself.
She understood the premise and the logic of what she’d murmured, but the reality of it terrified her.
Chaos meant unpredictability, and while she once embraced living that way, her years with Anthony had taught her that strict routines were the only way to avoid pain.
Not that they’d been a guarantee, but they’d been a chance, and that had been enough.
“I struggle with uncertainty,” she admitted. “And I don’t want my issues to affect Zoe. Or Spencer.”
Daphne’s gaze softened. “I hear you. But the baggage we each carry always affects those closest to us. Not always in bad ways, though. I mentioned it the other day, but maybe find a therapist who can help all of you with this massive shift.”
Amber considered the suggestion, then nodded. Everything was happening so fast, she hadn’t given it any serious thought, but she would.
“And talk to Juan,” Daphne continued. “If you have questions or concerns about how to make it all work, I can assure you, he does, too. It might be a hard conversation and maybe even a messy process, but the two of you will figure something out. You might try a few different things along the way, but if it’s important, you’ll figure it out. ”
The man in question walked in at that moment, followed by North and Scipio. His gaze scanned the room, then landed on her. A small smile touched his lips. One she answered with her own.
“They look like they were up to something,” Daphne murmured. Amber shifted her attention to Scipio and North, then studied all three of them. They each wore a look of sly satisfaction, as if they’d gotten away with something. Or were planning something.
“You’re right,” Amber replied. “And judging by the way North and Scipio aren’t looking at me, it’s probably something they don’t want me to know.”
Daphne leaned in. “Good thing you have the ability to persuade Juan. I’m not saying he’s malleable—none of the Falcons are. But a night of good loving, from the woman he loves, might convince him to share the details.”
The word love tripped through Amber’s head.
She didn’t want to label what lay between her and Spencer; she just wanted to feel it, experience it.
But Daphne wasn’t wrong. Not that Spencer needed sex to loosen his tongue, or that he’d be reluctant to talk with her about anything that concerned her or Zoe.
But a subtle (or not so subtle) reminder of their connection wouldn’t go amiss.
“On that note, I think it might be time to tuck in for the night,” she said. “Zoe wakes early.” They both rose.
“And you have orgasms to experience,” Daphne added, drawing everyone’s attention. Amber closed her eyes and exhaled. When she opened them, all five men were still grinning.
“I swear to god, Daphne…” she muttered under her breath.
Daphne chuckled, unabashed, as Lovell and Superman put their cues away and walked over, reaching them at the same time as Spencer, who wrapped an arm around her waist and kissed her temple.
Scipio and North veered toward the bedroom wing, raising a hand in a goodnight gesture as they headed to their rooms.
“What do you think about taking a boat out tomorrow?” Lovell suggested, lifting Daphne’s hand and kissing it before looping it around his forearm. “We could stop at Charley and Joey’s store and pick up one of those baby life jackets.”
“It’s supposed to be a nice day,” Spencer said. “The water will still be cold, but we can take Clara and Adrian around the lake. Maybe stop at the Pier for lunch?” he suggested, referring to a boat-up restaurant at the south end of the lake.
“Clara and Adrian have an appointment with the lawyer in the morning, but maybe after that?” Amber said.
She’d have to check with the two women, but a day on the water, away from murdering exes and legalizing her daughter’s status, sounded like a good idea.
And truth be told, there wasn’t much for her to do at this point.
Her lawyer was doing his thing while HICC did theirs.
She could either sit around the clubhouse and make herself crazy or get out and enjoy the day.
Choices, Daphne had said. There’d be a lot of them in the coming days, weeks, months, and years. But this was one she could make now.
“Sounds like a plan,” she said.
Spencer smiled. “I’ll call in the morning and reserve a boat for after Zoe’s morning nap. We can feed her a snack when she wakes up, then head out for a late lunch at the Pier?”
Everyone nodded, and after hugs goodbye and goodnight, Superman headed to his room, Lovell and Daphne home, and Spencer, still holding her hand, trailed her up the stairs to her room.