CHAPTER 45
Palmer
The next ten minutes are a whirlwind.
I grab the first pair of sweatpants and T-shirt that I see in my dresser and throw them on, then rush around the bathroom with my toothbrush in one hand and other things I need in the other. He said to grab stuff for TSA. We’re flying somewhere?
What the fuck is going on?
As I slide my feet into a pair of tennis shoes, I hear my front door click open, and Lindy’s voice rings out. “P?”
“Yeah, in here,” I garble around the toothpaste dripping down my chin.
She appears in the mirror next to me moments later. “I’ll take Mouse out. I’ve already talked to a couple of guys from the unit. They’re going to come take care of her while we’re gone.”
Take care of her? Gone? Why? I want to scream.
By the time I rinse my mouth, she has disappeared again. Should I grab my makeup? No, probably not.
“Passport in the safe?” Lindy calls out.
Dumping my school stuff out of my bag to shove my clothes in, I reply, “Yeah. The code is 10-21-14.”
“Got it!” She appears at my side, passport in one hand and my purse in the other. “Here. I already talked to Brad and let him know you’d be out for a bit. Sarah said she’d take care of your lesson plans until needed.”
I take it and empty what I need into the pockets of my backpack before turning to face her. “Lindy, what’s going on?”
Her face is pinched, and she avoids my gaze as she swings my bag over her shoulder. “Chase will explain on the drive. Let’s go.”
“Did you fill Mouse’s water and food bowl?” I ask, grabbing a hoodie as I walk behind her.
Mouse’s nails click on the floor as she follows us to the door.
Lindy’s voice is strained when she answers. “Yes, Palmer. I already took care of it. We’ve got to go. Now.”
I lean down to kiss Mouse’s head. “Be a good girl, Squeaks. I’ll be home soon.”
She wags her tail then saunters over to make herself at home on the couch as I close and lock the door behind me.
Lindy is already in the front seat of Chase’s truck, so I toss my bag across the back seat and scramble in behind it.
Chase throws the truck into reverse and guns it down the street before I even have my seatbelt buckled.
Normally, Lindy is blasting some sort of show tunes over the speakers, and the two of them are singing along off-key.
But not this morning. This morning, the cab of the truck is silent and so are they.
“Can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?” I demand. “Because if this is supposed to be some sort of cute homecoming surprise, I hate surprises, and also, I’m kind of freaking out a little bit.”
Chase is the first to reply, his eyes fixed on the road ahead and his knuckles tight on the steering wheel. “It’s not a homecoming surprise, PJ.” His voice is strained, and my stomach drops. “First, don’t be mad at Lindy, but she told me you’re pregnant.”
I wave my hand dismissively as if to say so what. “Yeah, I figured. I told her she could.”
He nods as if pondering what to say next before continuing. “This is going to be… a lot to hear, and I need you to stay as calm as you can, okay?”
My hand absentmindedly finds its way to my belly, my fingers trembling. “Okay,” my answer comes out more irritated than I intend. “That’s fine. I can do that. But can one of you please tell me what the fuck is going on!” My voice escalates into a shout.
Lindy looks as if she’s going to be sick. Her eyes search Chase’s face. The muscles in his jaw clench, and he shifts uncomfortably in his seat.
“Bailey was on a mission, and shit went sideways,” he says. “He’s at Walter Reed Medical Center in Maryland. He’s—” Chase stops and swallows hard. “He’s in bad shape, Palmer.”
“Wait,” I interrupt. “No. Hang on. There’s no way. What are you even talking about? How would you even know?”
“Palmer.” Chase’s eyes, illuminated by the dashboard lights, meet mine in the rearview mirror. “I know because it’s my job to know. And Bailey’s mom called me.”
My head reels as I struggle to grasp what he is saying. “What? That doesn’t make any sense. Why would she call you? Does she even know you?” I barely register the fact that Lindy’s hand is wrapped in mine.
An uncomfortable look crosses Chase’s face, as if he really doesn’t want to say what he needs to next. “Bailey’s mom called me because he told her to.”
Told her to? If he can tell her to then why didn’t he just call himself?
As if reading my thought, he says, “Before Bailey deployed, he told his mom all about you. He also told her that if anything were to happen to him or if she needed anything, she should call me. So, she did.”
“Okay,” I muse. “Then that means something happened to him. That something’s wrong.”
His expression turns grim. “Yes.”
Panic creeps into the edge of my voice. “Chase, what happened to Bailey?”
“There was an explosion, and…” Chase’s voice cracks. He clears it and continues. “He’s really messed up, Palmer. They have him in a medically induced coma, and I don’t—” His voice falters.
Time seems to slow around me. I can hear Chase’s voice, but I can’t make out what he’s saying over the ringing in my ears. Lindy studies me, her brows pinched together.
“What do you mean he’s messed up?” I croak. “Is he going to die?”
Chase opens and closes his mouth several times, searching for the right words. “I don’t know.”
I open my mouth, but no sound escapes except for a strangled cry. The road in front of me blurs as tears cascade down my cheeks.
“Breathe, Palmer.” Lindy strokes my hands soothingly, her voice shaking.
The wheezing inhale aches deep in my chest, but I can’t be sure if it’s the jagged breathing in my lungs or the feeling of my heart breaking.
How? How can this be happening?
Just a few weeks ago, he was here. In my arms. Telling me he loves me.
But I didn’t tell him I loved him, too.
Because I was scared.
And now, I’m going to lose him.