Chapter 23 #2
I’m clenching my fists and grinding my teeth while I wait for her to respond to whatever the person on the other end of the phone is saying.
She’s sitting on her yoga mat, her head dipped between her knees.
She says something that I can’t make out.
I try turning up the volume, but it’s already on high. Finally, she lifts her head.
“… always been an asshole to me, but for the first time ever, it seemed like he cared that this hurt me. Maybe he wants to change? I kind of panicked afterward because when the sex is that good, it just makes me feel insecure. Ever since Andrew, I’ve felt that way.
If I enjoy it, I worry it wasn’t as good for him.
It’s stupid, but that’s why Axel worked for me.
He wasn’t into it, and neither was I. It was mechanical.
When it’s hot, I freak out. I’ve been broken since my divorce. ”
She stands up and walks toward the studio.
“Ha! Yeah, it was that hot. I’ve never been that turned on in my life.” She opens the door and walks in, shutting it behind her.
My mind is whirling with what she just revealed.
Summer wants to be friends. She thinks she’s “broken” from her divorce, but she liked hooking up with me.
She’s never been that turned on in her life …
Blood rushes to my groin. Fuck, now I have new fantasies to explore. But I also feel like for the first time ever, I have a chance at getting closer to her.
If we can become friends, maybe there’s hope that, one day, we could be more.
Operation Make Summer Sullivan Forgive Me for Being a Colossal Dickhead the Last Thirteen Years starts forming in my mind, the perfect new obsession for me to hyperfixate on.
thirteen years earlier
“Just let me drive you home. You’re getting soaked.” I’m borderline begging her.
She’s walking ahead of me, almost to the resort. The rain came down fast and hard, drenching us in minutes. My eye is smarting from the pain, but at least the blood is getting washed away.
I don’t know what came over me. Something about seeing Will holding Summer so close ignited a fire in me I hadn’t realized was there. I’ve never felt so many conflicting emotions at once. I need her like I need air, but I don’t want to need her that way.
Her dress is sticking to her skin, revealing every delicious curve of her body. She stops at the front of the resort, finally under the awning. I walk up behind her, glaring at the valet attendant who attempts to approach her. He shrinks away.
“I’m calling an Uber. Go away.”
She’s tapping on her phone.
“My car is in the garage. I won’t talk to you on the way home.”
She ignores me. I want to punch someone again, preferably Will.
I clench my fist at my side. “You can drive my car.”
She shakes her head. I have a visceral need to reach out and grip the hair hanging down in damp waves over her back. The yellow dress is see-through now, and I hate that every man in the vicinity is looking at her like this.
You’re looking at her too.
No, I’m resisting the desire to let my eyes trail down because I already know I wouldn’t be able to erase the erotic image from my mind. Once it’s there, it’ll never leave.
I shove my hands in my pockets, leaning back against the stucco pillar. A red Ford rolls up, and Summer approaches the passenger window.
The girl in the driver’s seat has dark eyeliner around her eyes and punk rock playing over the speakers. My cousin, Cheri, is four years older than me. She smiles warmly at Summer before shooting daggers at me with her eyes. Wendy is in the passenger seat.
“Hey! Hop in,” she says to Summer.
Summer grabs the handle to the back door and slides into the seat.
I step forward, stopping her from closing the door with my hand.
Cheri shakes her head at me before climbing out of the car and walking around to the passenger side.
I look down at Summer, but her gaze is laser-focused on the taillights in front of her.
“Summer—”
“Shut the door, Dayton,” Cheri interrupts me.
I clench my jaw before gently closing the door and stepping back from her car.
“What’s going on, dude? Did you really expect her to talk to you after what you did?”
I’m surprised she already knows, but I guess in a town this size, word about a fight spreads fast. My father isn’t going to be happy with me.
“I just wanted to get her home safe. I didn’t—I wasn’t trying to ruin her prom night.”
“Then what were you trying to do?”
Voicing it feels impossible. I can’t say it out loud because I can barely think it.
“She can do better than him, all right?”
“Are you saying that you’re the better option here?”
I finally turn to look at her. “No. Not me, obviously.”
“Why obviously?”
“Because she’s my—she’s—you know what she is.”
Cheri shakes her head. “Yeah, I know. And he would never go for it.”
“Never. And I’m not saying that I would even if my dad—”
She shakes her head. “You gotta stop lying to me, dude. I was born on a day, but it wasn’t yesterday.
Your secret is safe with me. Just quit being such a dick to her.
She’s a teenage girl. She should be able to date guys and live her life without you showing up like a black cloud in all her core memories. ”
She walks back around to her door and peels out of the resort, leaving me dripping and defeated, but fully aware of how right she is.