Chapter 47
“Liam,” I call from my home office.
A couple weeks back, Austin, Tyler, and Liam spent an entire Saturday cleaning out the junk room and assembling office furniture so I’d finally have my own workspace. Something I’ve never once had, but always wanted. Now the room actually looks like an office instead of a storage unit.
My Saint Dolly candle sits beside the monitor, and the snake plant soaks up rays through the sunlit window. Penny is ridiculously proud I’ve managed to keep the thing alive this long.
When Liam doesn’t answer, I push back from the desk and wander through the house, calling out again. “How’s rosemary chicken sound for dinner? I think Mom would like it.”
The dining room is empty. So is the kitchen and living room.
I glance toward the deck out of habit, half expecting to find him leaning on the railing, cigarette between his fingers.
Then I catch myself. I’m still getting used to Liam’s new cigarette-free lifestyle.
Two months without a single one. He told me he went cold turkey the night of my wreck and never looked back.
I’m about to head outside anyway, when voices drift through the front door.
“Think she’ll be mad?” Austin’s voice, low and conspiratorial.
Liam’s low chuckle follows. “Prolly, but she’ll also be grateful.”
More than a little bit curious, I pull open the door, and the words I was preparing die in my throat, jaw falling slack.
Austin stands on the porch holding a key fob, while the other hand goes to scratch the back of his neck. “Surprise,” he and Liam say at the same time.
Peering around my brother, I see it. A baby blue SUV sits in the driveway, a big ass red bow perched on the hood. The exact same one I showed Austin one night when I told him I was saving to buy my own car so he could finally take his G-wagon back.
“Austin,” I say slowly while my brain struggles to catch up to my eyes. “What have you done?”
“Before you get mad, just hear me out”—he holds up a hand—“I know you were saving for one, but I’m sure the wreck took a chunk out of that.
The G-wagon was in great shape. Low mileage.
Even totaled, I still got a pretty penny from insurance.
This didn’t even take half of it.” He flashes a huge smile showing all his teeth and dangles the key fob in the air toward me.
He’s not wrong about the savings. What I’d built up living in Singing River rent free got swallowed up fast. Between the ambulance ride, surgery, a three-week hospital stay, and PT after, even with my insurance plan, my savings is next to nothing right now.
I don’t step forward to take them. In fact, I don’t move at all. I’m rooted in place, speechless, staring between Austin and the new vehicle in the driveway. “I also paid for a year of insurance,” he adds when I don’t say anything.
My voice finally finds its way back. “That’s mine?” I ask, pointing to the SUV that is very clearly a gift meant for me.
“That’s what I’m telling you.” He gives the key fob another hopeful shake. “You needed it.”
I still don’t move to take the keys. “I don’t drive yet,” I say.
It’s true. Riding as a passenger is hard enough. The first time I tried to drive Liam’s truck into town, my hands shook so badly I couldn’t even get the key in the ignition. Eventually, I had to swallow my pride and ask Liam to drive me instead.
“You will, angel,” Liam says, close beside me now. He smooths a hand down my back letting it settle around my waist. “I’d put money on it. You’re more like yourself every day.”
This is also true. PT is going well enough that they’re already talking about graduation. My head is also clearer with each passing day. I’ve even taken some of my easier clients back, though I can only handle two sessions a day for now. But still, it counts. It’s mine again.
Austin is still smiling that megawatt smile that has gotten him out of trouble his entire life.
A year ago, hell, just a few months ago, I would have pushed the keys back at him and said something about trying to buy my love.
But standing here now, looking at my brother shifting nervously, excited to do this for me, I see it differently.
Austin isn’t trying to buy anything. He’s just my big brother. And this shiny SUV with the over-the-top bow, is his way of smoothing out the road ahead for me the only way he knows how.
Crossing the porch, I wrap my arms around his waist and squeeze tight. “Thank you, Aussie,” I say, my face buried against his shoulder.
His arms come around me in a tight hug and I lean into the embrace, grateful to have so many people rooting for me.
“Anything for you, baby sis.”
“Okay, so…” Austin opens the driver’s side door with the energy of a car salesman ready to make his pitch. “Keyless entry. All you need is the fob on you.” He drops the keys in my hand and gestures for me to get in. “See what you think.”
Liam climbs in the passenger side while Austin gets in the back, leaning between us.
“All right, start her up.”
I look at the steering wheel and the dash, then back at Austin. “How?”
“Ah, I’m so glad you asked. All you do is tap the brake.
” With only the tap of my foot, everything on the dash comes to life.
“You guys hear that? She’s so quiet. No engine noise.
You just plug her up like a phone. Now check this out.
You can change the lighting.” Austin reaches for the touchscreen that’s as big as an iPad and begins tapping buttons.
“Orange, purple, blue, yellow. It has like, thirty colors or something.” He continues changing the colors one by one.
“Austin.”
“I’m almost done. I just wanted you to see them all. The red is really pretty. And look at this green.”
Liam lets out a sound somewhere between a laugh and a cough, and I have to bite back my smile. Austin is like a kid showing off his new toy, loving every second of this demo.
Taking a second, all I do is look around at the interior.
It smells new in a way I’ve never experienced firsthand.
My first car, a 1997 Nissan Sentra I bought for twelve hundred dollars’ cash, smelled like fast food and the previous owner’s cigarettes for the entire eight years I drove it.
I ran it till the wheels fell off. Literally.
It died on the side of the road and one tire rolled right off the wheel and into the median.
After that it was the bus, Uber, or Alan’s car when he felt generous enough to offer it.
This car smells like mine.
“Wanna take her for a spin?”
Yes. No. I don’t know. I swallow hard and look down the gravel driveway, where I know beyond that is the highway, cars flying past.
“I—” My hands find the steering wheel and I wrap them around it, just to have something to hold onto.
Both of them give me time to decide, which I appreciate.
“Yeah. Okay.”
Austin removes the giant bow from the hood and hops back in to show me how to put it in reverse. When I ease off the brake, the car rolls back so silently for a second I’m not sure we’re moving at all. I shift into Drive and grip the steering wheel.
Gravel crunches soft under the tires while I creep slowly down the drive. We pass Liam’s parents’ house right as my nerves kick up. In another hundred yards or so we’ll reach the highway. My pulse quickens the closer we get, but I manage to make it maybe ten more feet and ease us to a stop.
“I think that’s all for today,” I say quietly.
“Want me to take over?” Austin asks, not a trace of disappointment in his tone.
“Yeah.” I put it in Park. “I do.”
Austin and I trade places quickly, and I’m grateful neither of them makes a thing out of this. I’ll get there. I know it. Making it to the end of the driveway was a baby step. While Austin opens the sunroof and adjusts the seat and mirrors, Liam turns and tosses me a wink.
“Proud of you, baby.”
We ride for thirty minutes or so, but Austin needs to get back to Penny and Lizzie, so he turns us back toward home. He parks it in the same spot as earlier and cuts the power. A peaceful quiet settles over all three of us for a moment, sitting in my brand-new car.
“Well?” Austin says, breaking the silence.
I look from Austin to Liam and grin. “Next time I’ll make it onto the highway.”
Austin returns my grin with an almost identical one of his own. “Hell yeah, you will.”
The thermometer reads 157 and I need it to be at least 165, so I slide the pan back in the oven and set the timer for eight more minutes. That should be enough.
From the dining room, I can hear Liam noodling on the piano the way he does when he needs something to do. Leaning a hip against the counter, I listen for a few seconds and think about how easily this has become my life. Chicken in the oven, Liam at the piano, Mutt underfoot.
A knock at the door sends Mutt into his usual frenzy of excitement, barking, running as fast as his legs will carry him.
“Got it,” I call, wiping my hands on the towel. The music stops playing and Liam strides into the living room right as I’m opening the door.
Mom stands on the porch wearing a floral blouse I don’t recognize, holding a plate of Saran Wrap-covered cookies. Henry is a half-step behind her, twirling his newsboy cap in his hand.
“Hey, sweetheart.” Mom pulls me into a hug, gentle like she always is with me now, like I’m something she feared she’d lose and hasn’t quite let herself forget it. But the same could be said for her. I easily could have lost her, but here she is with Henry at her side.
“Hey, Mom.” I hold on an extra second before stepping back to smile at Henry. “I’m glad you made it, Henry. You got the tickets?”
Henry’s eyes go bright and from his back pocket he pulls out a stack of lottery tickets. “Got us some scratch offs this time. Thought it’d be a fun after dinner treat.”
This has become a weekly thing for Mom and me.
I lost so much time being careful with her, keeping a polite manageable distance.
Then the wreck happened. Liam told me she was there every day.
She brought food, she sat with him, and stayed later than she should have.
Somewhere along the way, she and I have stopped being careful and started being us.
Now she’s here weekly for dinner. Sometimes with Henry and sometimes alone.
I step aside to let them in. Henry greets Liam with a handshake, but when Mom steps forward, Liam wraps her up in his arms, resting his head on the top of her head, and my goodness.
Seeing him love the people I love, not because he has to but because along the way my people became his people, creates the sweetest ache unfurling in my chest.
I knew they spent a lot of time together during my hospital stay, but I didn’t realize just how much she’d come to mean to him until one day I found them sitting at the kitchen table, Mom doubled over, tears streaming down her face laughing at something Liam said.
A joke I wasn’t in on. Even she is charmed by him.
Liam and Henry step outside, probably so Liam can show off my new car, and Mom follows me to the kitchen. “Can I do anything to help?” she asks, setting the plate of cookies on the counter.
“You can sit down and let me cook for you.”
She huffs, but she does it, settling in a chair at the table while I check the chicken.
“You two seem good,” Mom observes.
“We are. I’ve never been happier.”
She’s quiet for a moment while I pull the chicken and roasted potatoes from the oven, setting them on trivets.
“He brought me flowers,” Mom finally says.
I glance up. “Who?”
“Henry.” She scratches at an invisible spot on the table, aiming for casual and missing by a long shot. “Before we came over. From the shop next to his.”
Her cheeks are pink and she won’t look at me.
“Mom.” I spin all the way to face her.
“Not a word.”
“I wasn’t gonna say a word.” I was actually going to say a few.
After a beat she meets my eyes. “You have a face right now.”
“That’s just my face.” I press my hands to my cheeks knowing damn well it’s anything but my normal face. “I think it’s nice. Henry’s nice. And you deserve someone who stops to buy you flowers on the way to dinner.”
She presses her lips together. “It’s not—we’re not—” She stumbles over her words and I can’t help smiling. “We’re just friends, Cassie.”
I arch a brow. “You know who else was ‘just friends’?” I put air quotes around the words. “Me and that man out there. And I assure you, we were anything but.”
Mom opens her mouth. Closes it. All the while, the pink staining her cheeks deepens considerably.
“But I’ll play along with you and your friend, if that’s what you want.”
Mom snorts a laugh, and I call Liam and Henry to eat.
“Coins ready?” Henry asks, looking around the table. Liam, Mom, and I all hold up matching quarters. “Let the scratching begin.”
We scratch in silence, the only sound the rasp of coin against paper.
“Nothing,” Liam says a minute later, tossing the ticket. “I never win these,” he grumbles under his breath.
I pat his arm in mock sympathy and hold up my losing card. “You can’t win everything, babe. I thought you learned that with poker.”
Liam’s eyes cut to mine and huffs out a laugh. “How ’bout you two? Anything?”
“Not a thing,” Henry says.
But Mom is still scratching. And scratching. We all watch as the color drains from her face and she sets the quarter down.
“Mom?”
She doesn’t answer, or even look up. She’s still as a statue, only her eyes moving across her ticket.
“Beth.” Liam leans forward. “What is it?”
She looks up, and her mouth opens but no sound comes out. I’m not sure if I should be concerned or not, but then she holds up the ticket for us to see.
Five thousand dollars. My mom just won five thousand fucking dollars from a scratch off.
Liam is on his feet before the rest of us have time to move. Rounding the table, he puts both hands under her arms and lifts her clean out of the chair.
“Liam,” she gasps, and then she’s laughing, feet dangling in the air, a winning ticket still clutched in her hand.
Henry and I look at each other across the table. He’s grinning so wide his eyes turn to slits and then he looks over at Mom who is still dangling from Liam’s arms.
This is it. Right here. This is the good stuff. Mom’s face lit up. Liam laughing, and Henry looking at her like she’s all he wants to see.
While nobody is looking, I turn my phone over and navigate to my notes app, where my unfinished list still sits. With a satisfied smile, I put a check mark next to Get to know my mom.
Done.