Chapter 33
ALEX
I am so fucked.
Everyone in Portland that I have seen is thrilled I’m back.
Practice yesterday went great. Everyone wanted to talk about Coach Leon, of course, and our head coach let everybody get their questions and gossip out of the way before we hit the ice.
More information has come out in the news, so the story is less of a mystery.
It sounds like Coach Leon will be doing time.
According to the local news and sports shows, Portland fans are happy I’m back.
Declan called me into his office and told me the same.
He also told me he was impressed with what we’d done so far with the Revelers.
I don’t even ask how he knows about the behind-the-scenes in Louisiana.
I doubt it’s from Astrid directly, but Astrid tells her friend Miles everything, and it wouldn’t surprise me if Miles tells Iris, who tells Declan.
Or Miles might tell Declan directly. Or hell, Declan might hack into Astrid’s computers and phones.
He’s got the money to pay the best hackers.
Of course, he’d better sleep with one eye open if my sister ever finds out.
So, I’m back in my city, involved with hockey, and working for my team again. Everyone here likes me. Things are going exactly according to my plans.
But I’m fucked.
Because I miss Rebel, Louisiana.
I’m going to miss the Revelers' first game, and I am actually sad about that.
Ruth and I have agreed that she’ll call me during the game and let me watch via video call on her phone, but I’ve been on my sister’s ass about getting a live stream going by tomorrow night.
She told me she’s on top of it, then sent me three middle-finger emojis.
I have also typed and deleted eight or nine messages to Nora.
A couple were flirty, a couple were casual, a couple were very emotional.
I don’t know what to say to her.
Or, more accurately, I have a lot to say to her. But I don’t think I should say any of it.
She’s going to stay in Rebel. Of course she is. There’s no way I could take that girl out of that town. They need her, but even more than that, she’s happy there. At home. And I know she appreciates that, but she doesn’t even know how great she’s got it.
Portland would never feel like home, not the way Rebel is. Portland would love her, but not the way Rebel loves her.
“Nervous about tonight?” Brantley Wilkins slaps me on the back as he walks past me in the locker room.
“Just a lot on my mind.”
I rarely got nervous before games anyway, but tonight feels completely different. I’m not the one on the ice. I won’t be taking the shots or the hits. I’ll be sitting on the bench.
It only took me one practice to realize this isn’t what I want.
I’d probably be okay at coaching. I know the game inside and out.
I’m someone others listen to. I can recognize when someone needs to make an adjustment and I can help them do that.
But well, some guys just know that coaching is in their blood, and I don’t think it’s in mine.
It’s a killer to just stand on the side and watch other people play the game.
I want to be in on the action.
Even if the action occasionally includes wiffle balls, lip syncing, and high kicks.
I’m so fucked.
I’m going to have to walk into Declan’s office after the game tonight and tell him that I’m quitting. Because I’m going back to Rebel.
I woke up this morning and knew exactly what I was going to do today. I knew what to wear, I knew what I was going to eat, and I had a car pick me up and take me where I needed to go. There were no mason jars anywhere, claiming that Brussels sprouts or raisins are better than I am.
And it all felt wrong.
“Wilkins,” I say from where I’m leaning against the wall, waiting to go out to the bench.
“Yeah?” Then he chuckles. “I don’t know what to call you. I mean, obviously I should call you coach, but that feels weird.”
I nod. It feels weird to me too. “Call me what you always have.” There’s no sense in them getting used to calling me ‘coach’.
“Okay, Olsen, what’s up?” he asks.
“What’s your favorite movie?”
This obviously surprises him. “Huh, I don’t know. I really like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.”
Solid choice, I guess. It’s a fun one.
“Why, what’s yours?” he asks.
A month ago, I would’ve told him The Dark Knight, but today I say, “Monsters, Inc.”
He chuckles as do the other guys listening in.
“Isn’t that a cartoon?” Max Carson asks.
I nod. “Yep.”
“Yeah, with the big green monster, right?”
“The big monster is blue. The little round one is green.”
He laughs and nods. “Right. You like that one best of all? Of all movies?”
“I do. Makes me smile. It’s got a good message too.”
Ivan Kozlov pipes up. “Watched it with my nephew,” he says. “It’s good.”
“Yeah? Did you get the message?” Max asks.
“That we shouldn’t be so afraid. You just picture the things that scare you as cartoon monsters. Then you’re not so afraid anymore.”
I think that over. Okay, I guess that could be one interpretation.
Wilkins nods and then looks at me. “I like that. Thanks, Coach.”
I laugh. I had absolutely zero to do with any of that.
“Let’s go!” Coach Blake yells, and everyone heads for the door.
I bring up the rear, finding my place with the other assistants in the bench area. I’m able to lose myself in the game for several minutes, but I find myself scanning the crowd during a media timeout.
I freeze as my gaze finds a small group of fans directly across from our bench.
I feel like all of the air has been sucked out of my lungs.
Bruce, Harley, Leo, and Ruth are sitting right next to the ice, wearing Revelers jerseys, and holding up signs that say, “Go, Alex!” and “Rebel, Louisiana, says hi!” with a huge face of Rougie the mascot.
My heart squeezes hard in my chest, and I am hit by a wave of nostalgia unlike any I’ve had before.
Then Ruth lowers her sign, and I see who’s sitting right next to her. My favorite person in the world. Chaos and sunshine in one little package. And she’s wearing her bright yellow overalls over her jersey.
The love of my life, Nora Delaune, came to Portland after all.
The shock wears off quickly. They all came for me. And everything about that feels right.
I pull my phone out and text a member of the PR team. Need a huge favor.
Her name is Sydney and she replies after only a few seconds. Will the fans love it?
Alex: So fucking much. Promise.
Sydney: I’ll be right down.
I tell her my plan and she lights up. “That’s so good, Alex,” she gushes. “Yes, I can definitely set that up.”
“Great. Thanks.”
She rushes off to get everything ready for the first intermission.
I pull my phone out again and text the next person who I need to get up to speed.
Alex: Thanks for the chance, but I quit.
Declan: Dammit, Alex.
I just grin.
Then I notice movement across the ice. Sydney is talking to Nora. Nora asks her something. Sydney nods. Nora shakes her head. Sydney nods again, then motions for Nora to follow her. Ruth, Bruce, Leo, and Harley start encouraging her and finally Nora gets to her feet.
She glances in my direction, and I pretend to be watching the game.
I probably should be doing that anyway. I am coaching right now, after all.
But nothing else matters. Nora is here, and we are not doing a long-distance relationship.
We’re also not not doing a relationship.
Finally, it’s intermission and the team files into the locker room. We’re up by two, and everyone is playing well, so it’s going to be relatively low-key in there.
“Hey, Coach,” I say to our head coach. “I have something I need to take care of.”
He nods. “Fine.”
I head back out, but take one of the tunnels saved for arena staff. I lurk at the end, watching Sydney’s intermission event. She’s out at center ice with two women.
“Hey, Grays fans! We’re so happy to be back in this arena with our Grays on the ice, aren’t we?” Sydney asks into the mic she’s holding.
The fans cheer loudly.
“Well, we’ve got a super fun contest for this first intermission! I want you to all help me welcome two Grays fans. This is Becky!”
The fans cheer as the blonde in a Grays’ jersey with our goalie's name and number on it waves.
“And this is Nora!”
Nora, in her yellow overalls, also waves as the fans cheer. She looks out of place with her purple, gold, and green jersey, though.
“Okay, ladies, so I haven’t told you what you’re going to be doing, right?” Sydney asks.
They both shake their heads.
“Well, let me tell you the prize you’re playing for first!” she says with a laugh. “The winner gets a movie night date with none other than one of the Grays’ favorite players-now-coach Alex Olsen!”
The crowd goes wild. The cheering and screaming is loud and long.
But I don’t look at anyone but Nora.
Her eyes are wide, and her whole body is suddenly tense.
I grin.
She doesn’t like the idea of another woman winning a date with me. I’d bet a thousand dollars on it.
“I know!” Sydney says to the crowd. “And it’s a movie night date in an undisclosed location!”
More cheering.
Nora is now glancing around.
I’d also bet she’s looking for me. And I’d bet that images of the park in Rebel are going through her mind.
“And all you have to do to win is be the best at lip syncing and dancing to the song we give you!” Sydney says. She laughs. “We’re going to let the fans decide who does it best, so be sure to bring your best performance.”
I burst out laughing at the look on Nora’s face now. They have the three women up on the jumbotron, and she looks part horrified and part I’m-going-to-kill-him, with maybe a dash of okay-that’s-pretty-funny.
I’m completely in love with her.
She’s absolutely going to win.
Sydney’s been instructed to claim Nora’s the winner even if Bruce, Harley, Leo, and Ruth are the only people who cheer for her.
But am I going to make her lip sync and dance on the ice in front of an arena full of hockey fans first?
Oh, I most definitely am.
“You ready, ladies?” Sydney asks.
“Totally!” Becky says.
“I am,” Nora says. Much less enthusiastically.
Becky goes first. She lip-syncs the first two verses of “Girls Just Want to Have Fun.” She does very well and gets loud applause.
But when the jumbotron focuses in on Nora’s face, her expression is pure determination.
I love it.
She is not going to let another woman win time with me.
Okay, Wildflower, bring it.
I also chose her song. I prop a shoulder against the wall, tuck my hands into my pockets, and settle in to watch.
As Sydney talks to the crowd and hypes up the second contestant, Nora scans the area and, just as Sydney hands her the microphone, she finds me.
Our eyes lock. I grin. Her eyes narrow.
And she starts to lip sync without looking at the lyrics they’re scrolling on the screen for her.
Elvis’s “Can’t Help Falling in Love” never sounded so good.
She does just one verse.
I start walking toward her before she’s even finished.
I’m only a step away when she tosses the mic to Syndey and jumps into my arms.
I catch her, just like I did at the airport. This time, though, I’m not holding a bag. And I’m ready.
I crush her against my chest. “I love you, Wildflower,” I say against her ear.
“I love you too,” she says against my throat. “So much. I’m here. I’m staying. I left Rebel.”
I’m vaguely aware that the arena is losing its mind and Sydney is saying something about how she supposes this means Nora wins, but all I can really focus on is what Nora just said.
I reach up and cup the back of her head, tugging gently on her hair. She tips her head back.
“What did you say?”
“I left Rebel. I want to be with you. I’m moving to Portland.”
“You…don’t leave home.”
“Because I never had a good enough reason before. Now I do.”
I feel my heart squeezing so tight I almost can’t breathe. “No,” I say simply.
Her brows go up. “What?”
“No. I love you, and I want to be with you, but not here. We are going back to Rebel.”
She shakes her head. “No, really. I’m good. I’m good here.”
“As much as that thrills me, you don’t belong here. And I don’t belong here anymore either. Because we belong in Rebel, Wildflower. We belong at home.”
She sucks in a breath, and her eyes fill with tears. “Home?”
I squeeze her. “Yeah. Home. I love you so much. And Rebel needs you. I need you. And… I need Rebel.”
Her big brown eyes are even bigger than usual. “Really?”
“Of course, really. I’m an ex-hockey player turned coach here. In Rebel, I’m Alex. A guy who loves bananas and Monsters, Inc. and that crazy town, and their amazing Parks and Rec director, and who also happens to slap a puck around the ice sometimes.”
She slides down my body, but stands, smiling up at me so brightly I have to blink twice. “You’d rather play hockey in Rebel than coach in the pros? Really?”
I laugh. “I still don’t know that we should call that hockey.”
She grins. “Okay, fine. Bonkers hockey.”
I nod. “Yes. I’d rather play bonkers hockey.”
She laughs, her eyes shining with tears. But she shakes her head. “Thank you for that. I love that. But what you’re doing here is important. This is big, Alex. Declan needs you. The Grays need you. Portland needs you. I’ll move here. It’s okay. We can be together here.”
I’m frowning as I cup her face and look directly into her eyes. I need to be sure she hears this clearly.
“Nora, this is just hockey. What you do is important. Far more important than me coaching here. Anyone can do this job.”
She tries to shake her head, but I’m holding her too firmly.
I smile. “Okay, not anyone, but a lot of people. Declan will find someone else. But no one else can do what you do, the way you do it. You make people better, Nora. You make hearts better. Jesus, that’s the most important thing.
And I want that too. I want to be with you in Rebel.
Please.” I lower my head until my mouth is just above hers.
“I want a front row seat for all the things you do. I want to come to movie night, I want to help set up for all your festivals, and I want to pick wildflowers with you. Please let me live in Rebel with you.”
It takes a second, but it finally sinks in, and she laughs as a tear slips down her cheek. “You’re actually begging to come back to Rebel?”
“I am,” I say sincerely. “I need more Otter Club, Nora.”
She laughs again and hugs me tightly, pressing her face to my neck.
“And…” I say.
She pulls back and looks up expectantly. “And?”
“I think we can call this love now, right?”
She nods quickly. “Definitely.”
Then I dip her back and kiss her right there at center ice.