14. Abbie
Abbie
I’m not really close to my brother Jake, probably because he was the oldest and I was the youngest. By the time I was aware of much of anything, he was busy.
He was always scarce around the house, and I grew up thinking that he worked all the time.
He was polite enough but not a warm person or one who had a lot of time for anybody.
You didn’t go to Jake for sympathy, for example, although he might lend you some money for a short period.
He always had money. He was always firm about principles.
When he went away to university, I don’t remember him coming back.
Not even for Christmas.
After the first year, no one even mentioned his absence.
I assumed that Jake and our father argued.
The older I got, the easier it became to believe that.
My father was difficult and demanding. Just this past week, I watched him lose his shit at Mike, who is the most easy-going big brother anybody could have.
Even better, Dad lost it because Mike found out Dad had been lying to him for years.
That wasn’t Mike’s fault – his crime was falling in love with Sylvia, who my father didn’t deem to be worthy – but Dad made it sound as if Mike had brought the whole thing on himself.
I love that Mike stood up for himself and defended Sylvia, but wish that day had ended differently.
Dad worked himself up so much that he had a massive heart attack.
I would have liked them to reconcile and come to appreciate each other. I would have liked Dad to meet Sylvia and Mike’s daughter, Sierra. She’s his first and only grand-daughter and it makes me ache that he denied her for her entire life.
Of course, it shouldn’t have been a surprise. He did the same to Luke, who was his own son.
I prefer happy endings. Call it a weakness, but I do. I also dislike confrontations and conflict, which meant that the farther I could be from Dad, the better for my mental health. Vancouver was the choice. Like Jake, I haven’t been back to Empire in years, so maybe we have something in common.
I’m surprised that Jake offered me a ride to the airport. I don’t remember him ever offering to do anyone a favour, but I accepted. I can’t even imagine how I’d get transit to Pearson from here otherwise, never mind what it would cost.
On the other hand, the prospect of hours alone in the car with Jake is a little daunting. It was a relief to learn this morning that he and Luke had agreed to a fresh start. Luke went to talk to Jake about the estate – I can’t imagine why but he’s not talking about it – so that’s reassuring.
Plus, Luke and Daphne have a happy ending. It was great to have breakfast with them before heading home. They’re so happy together and watching them gives me all the warm fuzzies.
I’ve even promised to come back for their wedding in September.
I stand in Cameron’s driveway with my bag, waiting for Jake.
I know better than to keep him waiting. He’d probably just drive on without me.
I insisted that Daphne and Luke go about their day instead of hanging around with me to wait.
I’m staying with Cameron and she was here, but has vanished.
Maybe she got a call. She loves her phone even more than I love mine.
I hear the car before I see it and I smile in admiration when it comes into view.
No crumbling old pile of junk for my successful brother.
Jake’s car is a gorgeous bright red BMW convertible.
It can’t be two years old, and must be his pride and joy.
He drives it with confidence, pulling to a halt right in front of me.
“Oh!” I wince at the scratch down the left side. It’s the whole length of the car.
Jake smiles ruefully as he gets out of the car. He sighs and shakes his head. “Still making friends in Empire,” he says, as if that explains everything, then smiles at me. There is no humor in his eyes. He looks tired, older than I expect. “How are you, Abbie? You’re looking well.”
So is Jake, at least on the outside. He’s wearing a suit that must have cost six months of my rent, a white shirt with French cuffs and a tie of gleaming silk. He looks expensive, but then he probably is.
“Fine, all things considered.” I give him a cheeky look. “Don’t I get a hug? Or will that mess with your presentation?”
I am affectionate. Jake is not. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen him hug anyone, and in this moment, I’m sure that’s part of his problem. People need physical contact.
It takes him a second, but he cedes. “It might, but I only have one sister.” Jake opens his arms without taking one step closer, but that doesn’t slow me down.
I give him a tight hug. It is like embracing a hydro pole.
He’s all muscle, hard as a rock, as welcoming as, well, a hydro pole.
Up close, it’s harder to miss the shadows under his eyes and he holds onto me a beat longer than I expect.
Okay, it’s been a rough few days for all of us.
“You okay?” I ask, not letting go.
“Been better. You?”
“I’m glad the celebration of life will be later. I’m relieved to be headed home now.”
His smile flashes. “There is that. Glad I could give you a ride today.”
“Me, too. I wasn’t even sure how to get there from here.” I give him a squeeze. “Getting all the value out of your gym membership?”
He looks briefly surprised. “I have weights at home. It’s easier.”
More expensive but more convenient. That’s Jake all over. Time is money etc.
He moves away and I relinquish my grip on him. “How’d you get to Empire in the first place?”
“Merrie gave me a ride. I met her for the first time at the airport.”
“I hope you got along. It’s a bit of a haul.”
I smile. “We did. She’s great. Have you met her?”
“Briefly. She’s an awesome chef.” Jake moves around the car to open the passenger door.
I’m glad I pack light because there’s not a lot of room in the car.
The back seat has two bankers’ boxes on the seat, but Jake manages to nestle my bag between them.
It’s certainly not the most generous back seat space I’ve ever seen, but I guess people don’t buy cars like this to take their kids to Montessori school.
“What about the trunk?”
“Full,” he says with a shrug.
“Is this Dad’s stuff?”
“All of his records and files, yes.” Jake looks weary at that but before I can ask, Cameron comes out of the house.
She’s practically bouncing, her features alight.
She’s wearing a red print sundress that looks fresh and feminine.
It is not what she was wearing five minutes ago, which explains where she’s been.
“Well, hello again,” she says with a bright smile, strolling toward the car. “It’s Jake Cavendish, right?”
“Right. Am I right that you’re Cameron?”
“Cameron Sinclair, RN.” She smiles up at him. “You ever have a medical emergency, just give me a call.”
I blink. I should know by now that Cameron isn’t subtle, but sometimes she surprises me.
Jake’s brows rise. He looks unimpressed and very cool. Even Cameron has to realize he’s not interested. “You’d come all the way to Toronto to help?”
“Aren’t you going to be in Empire on occasion now?”
“No.” He speaks with finality.
“I thought you were executor of your dad’s estate.”
“I am, but I’m hoping that can be handled remotely, with Richard Bradshaw’s help.” He smiles politely. “Still got to put in the hours at the day job, too. It’s going to be a busy summer.”
“No rest for the wicked and all that,” I say and Jake laughs.
“That is my theme song. Nice to meet you, Cameron.” He ushers me into the car, checking his watch. “It looks like the traffic might be bad, so we’d better head out, Abbie. I wouldn’t want you to miss your flight.”
I wave to Cameron as Jake gets in and starts the car. He backs out of the driveway with verve.
“Making an escape?” I tease and he chuckles.
“Feels like it, doesn’t it?”
“Cameron isn’t looking for forever, you know.”
“And I’m not looking for anything right now. I have just too much to do.”
That’s fair, but I’m still curious.
“Is she too direct?”
Jake considers that for a minute. “No. I like women who know what they want and aren’t afraid to ask for it.”
“But you’re seeing someone?”
He almost laughs. “No.” He casts a glance at me that’s almost playful. “But just because something is offered, doesn’t mean you have to accept.”
“Yes, but I’m wondering why.”
“I don’t know exactly. It was an instinctive response, and I’ve learned to trust my instincts.” He nods. “It wouldn’t work with Cameron, not even for one date. I don’t know why or how I know that, but I do.”
“And you trust that impression.”
“Of course. Don’t you trust your instincts, Abbie?”
“Sometimes. Often I second-guess them or review them.”
Jake shakes his head. “Better to just choose and move on.”
“And if you’re wrong?”
“Well, you were wrong. No one can be right all the time. Just choose and move forward. Maybe you’ll get a chance to choose again. Maybe not. Regrets and second guesses don’t solve anything.”
His view makes sense, though it’s more hard-line than I tend to be. “You must have some regrets sometimes,” I say finally and he snorts.
“All the time, Abbie. I just don’t dwell on them.”
“Because it serves nothing.”
“Exactly. The best you can do is try to learn from those mistakes and not repeat them.” He smiles. “Refine your gut instincts for the future.”
I nod, then realize something. “Did you eat at Merrie’s place in Toronto?”
“What place?”
“She had a restaurant there before coming to Empire. You said she was a good chef, so...”
“Oh, I ate at The Carpe Diem Café this week. Wednesday night. It was great.”
“And that’s where you met Cameron,” I say, because it was the girls’ night to get together.
“Yes.”
Maybe she was even more forward then.
He glances at me. “But if you were in town, shouldn’t you have been there, too?”
“I was upset about Dad and didn’t want to be social. I stayed at Daphne’s place with Luke.” It had been a quiet evening, exactly what I’d needed. “Can you believe he’d never seen Sense & Sensibility?”