Chapter Seven #2
It seemed his mom had fallen in love with German.
She let them share a room. His mom never let anyone unmarried share a room under her roof.
Blaze supposed he needed to keep German now.
Of course, that had already been his plan all along.
No one had ever made him feel this way. German didn’t realize the truth yet.
Blaze had never brought anyone home to meet his family.
At least, not anyone who was more than a friend.
Yet this was the second time he had brought German.
He didn’t know why he had asked German to come with him that first time.
That wasn’t true. He just hadn’t wanted to admit to himself that someone had finally gotten under his skin.
Now he had more than accepted that. Blaze had decided German would not get away from him.
No matter what it took. The guy was so fucking amazing.
Blaze had no idea why someone hadn’t locked him down yet.
The bed dipped as Blaze crawled onto the mattress behind German. German searched online for nearby stores with the biggest selection of model paints. Blaze kissed his shoulder.
“Thank you.”
German set his phone aside and looked over his shoulder. “For what?”
Blaze kissed him again. This time, he held German’s stare as his lips skimmed German’s skin. “For swooping in and keeping Ben calm. You know, for being you.”
German twisted and crawled forward until he had Blaze on his back. Then he rolled to his side and brought Blaze with him so they were face to face. “You don’t have to thank me. You know I adore that little guy. How are you, though? We haven’t really had a chance to talk.”
Blaze shrugged. He never knew how to talk about this.
“Dara is four years younger than me. We’re both dreamers.
I guess we saw that about each other pretty young and ended up glued at the hip.
” Blaze’s throat swelled. His voice came out in a whisper when it didn’t want to work.
“I don’t know how to reach her where she’s at.
” He swallowed past the growing lump. “She’s killing herself.
Ben is stuck on this ride with her, and I’m so fucking angry.
” Blaze took a breath and fought back tears.
“So fucking angry,” Blaze repeated, trying to stay on track and not cry.
“She has this baby who never got to be a baby because she just fails him over and over again. My mom is stressed and doesn’t sleep.
Everyone is holding their breath, waiting for a day like today to be the last one.
But it’s like something died inside her a long time ago.
I honestly think the only thing keeping her from ending it all is Ben.
If he hadn’t come along, she would’ve given up a long time ago.
Dude, I just…” God, he didn’t know. He was at a loss, and no one ever asked him how he was doing.
It seemed selfish to even worry about himself with so many other people involved. He wasn’t special.
German moved even closer, holding Blaze.
“You’re allowed to be hurt, angry, scared, and however else you feel.
She’s your sister. Ben is your nephew. This shit isn’t right, and it isn’t fair.
But there’s also a little boy involved who’s wearing a super brave face.
I think maybe focusing on shielding him as much as possible and lessening the blows to his life might make you feel like you’re not as helpless as you think.
There are things we can do. We can be involved and take some stress off your mom. ”
Blaze’s gaze moved over German’s face. He honestly hadn’t done a goddamn thing in his life to deserve this amazing man. “We?”
German huffed. “Of course, we. We’re a team. You have me to lean on. I’m here. Put me in, Coach.” German smiled. “I bet you’d look adorable wearing baseball pants. That sexy little ass running around the bases.”
An unexpected laugh came out as a snort at German’s complete veer off topic. “You’re so weird. I never know what you’ll say next.”
German shrugged. “My brain takes seven side quests with every word I say. Even I don’t know when one sentence will spawn another totally unrelated sentence. This is who I am. I thought you loved that about me?” German pulled a fake hurt tone with that last bit. He had Blaze hooked.
A strange calmness fell over Blaze. He knew his heart. “Well, I definitely love something about you.”
German traced the line of Blaze’s jaw, making him want to lean into German’s touch like a cat. His eyes softened. “Good. I love everything about you.”
Blaze wasn’t good at stewing over things. He was too seize-the-day for that shit. “Was that your way of telling me you love me?”
German’s forehead furrowed. “Was that not clear? Yeah. I love you. I’m in love with you. Am I saying this wrong? I mean, I know I’m not good at it or whatever.”
Blaze kissed him, cutting off the rambling.
It was a sweet kiss—as if neither of them wanted the moment to end.
But Blaze had some shit to say too, and there was no time like the present.
He pulled away. “I love you too. In a way, it feels odd. Our relationship has been more on FaceTime than not. But we also had these months where we ran into each other everywhere, and it never felt awkward. It was, in a way, like we had our own crazy relationship going on, but we hadn’t admitted it yet. Does that make sense?”
German’s expression said everything. He felt the same.
“Yeah. I get it. If I was somewhere I knew you’d be, I searched every face until I found you.
It was almost as if I’d made plans to see you there, even though that makes no sense.
I never even questioned why I felt that way.
I guess, in my heart, you were already mine in some way. ”
Damn. Blaze really was in love with him. German said things no one else would likely understand, but it was always like he spoke every thought Blaze had but couldn’t articulate. He was pretty damn sure they were meant to be. “Maybe this isn’t our first lifetime together.”
German smiled. “Maybe.”
For the longest time, they simply stared at each other, enjoying just being together.
Their feet played, and they kept stealing kisses.
Blaze couldn’t imagine this connection with anyone else.
He was happy. Blaze was at peace. He never wanted to lose this.
Whatever it took, German would always be his.