Chapter 11 #2
His laugh was soft, shy almost. He released her and watched as she get out of the car, bag in tow and started toward the building. Every step further from Cairo, Kamilla attempted to hold on to the confidence he’d given to her in the last five minutes.
“Surprised your saddity ass showed up after leaving me here to close by myself,” QaMeesha quipped once Cairo pulled off.
“I was scheduled from eleven to four and that’s what I worked. Just like I am today. You not scheduling reliable people isn’t my problem,” Kamilla spoke, stepping into the building past her funk.
“You really feeling yourself, ain’t you? Fuckin’ on that nigga is going to your head,” QaMeesha fussed, following her into the building. “You ain’t nobody fuckin’ special.”
“Which means I must be if you think so highly of me. Just leave me alone so I can get through my shift unbothered,” Kamilla quipped. “I don’t feel like going through this every day with you.”
“Oh, bitch, you’re going to feel me. Coming in here looking down your nose at me like some uppity Emerald City bitch.”
Kamilla scoffed, rolled her eyes, and went to put her things away. Only for QaMeesha to grab a fist full of hair and yank her backward.
“I wanna see how good he treats you when that face is all scarred up,” she gnashed.
Kamilla flailed her arms, attempting to get out of QaMeesha’s grasp. She’d never been in any situation like this, but she knew her face on a hot grill wasn’t going to happen. So she fought to get free. But it was the bellow of the Azul Kush-tainted baritone that instantly bought her relief.
“Ay, bitch!” Cairo bellowed, making QaMeesha stop, release Kamilla, and smile.
“C4,” she breathlessly spoke. “I was just playing with her. Trying to toughen her up, you know? Like you like them.”
“Get in the car, K,” Cairo gritted, holding her phone. That was the only reason he’d turned around.
Kamilla, on the brink of unraveling, grabbed her things and hurried to the car. Cairo peered at QaMeesha with darkness obstructing his view. He wouldn’t touch her, but he wanted her to know it was coming.
“You know you fucked up right? That jealousy is going to be the reason your burning ass stays right where you are. I’d be looking over my shoulder every fucking second,” he snarled. “The fuck did you think this was?”
“C4, I-”
“When it comes to her, don’t so much as blink in her direction. Matter of fact,” he paused to let a chilling laugh fall from his lips. “Don’t worry about blinkin’ again, bitch.”
Cairo walked to the car and quickly got in.
What he found was Kamilla in the first part of her breakdown.
She was trying to hold it together, trying not to return to the mess she’d been.
But right now, it was all too much. Upon instinct, Cairo sped out of the parking lot and grabbed her hand.
He didn’t take her back to the house, he took her to a spot where for the last ten years, his tears and screams and breakdowns had been safe from the world.
“Come on, walk with me,” he urged, opening her door and holding his hand out for her to take.
“Cairo, I just want-”
“You’ll feel better if you walk,” he encouraged.
With blind trust that she was safe in his care, she placed her hand in his and let her feet follow.
Before her sneaker-covered feet could touch the sand, he bent down and removed her shoes then his.
Hand-in-hand, she walked in step with him, her eyes focused on the sand covering her toes.
Anything to steady her suppressed emotions.
By the time they stopped walking, they were at least half a mile away from where he parked. Kamilla climbed on top of a boulder, with Cairo’s assistance because he couldn’t help himself. With her knees pulled to her chest she looked over at him and asked, “How’d you find this place?”
“My mom used to take me here. I didn’t process my emotions well, so this is where she took me to scream. She said she’d rather me roll in the damn sand than causing havoc on the streets. As you could imagine, I was bad as fuck.”
“Would’ve never guessed that,” Kamilla muttered, turning from him to look at the water. “How long has she been gone?”
“Ten years. What about you?”
Kamilla pulled in a deep breath and chewed the inside of her cheek. The levy was breaking and there was nothing she could do to hold it in. “Four weeks and I-I-”
He moved closer.
“I’m so mad at her, Cairo. I’m so angry. Why would she just leave me out here with nobody?” Kamilla asked, bawling into her hands. He pulled her into his arms and let her release. It was apparent it was overdue.
When she finally lifted her head, he swiped the tears from her cheeks.
“I’m sorry. I just-”
“Haven’t had a chance to grieve in peace. I get it. You don’t have to apologize either,” he shared.
Kamilla rested her head on his shoulder.
“Her taking her life only solidified that I lost her when we put my father in the ground. As toxic as their relationship was, it was three of us and I fit there. Now, I’m just out here alone trying to figure it out and it sucks.
I don’t know how to do this. How am I supposed to do this? ”
Cairo didn’t respond. What Kamilla needed was to let everything out she’d been holding on to.
“Fuckin’ selfish,” Kamilla muttered, sniffling and wiping the hot tears from her face.
“She swallowed a bottle of pills three days after graduation and wrote me a note saying she did all she could do. Then slit her wrists open. I couldn’t even grieve my father without being the butt of a joke or befriended for clout. ”
Kamilla lifted her head and fidgeted with her hands. “How do you deal with this?”
“K, I’m a lot more felonious than you,” Cairo admitted.
“So you just killed people?”
He swayed his head. “I killed the person responsible. It never made the pain go away. That’s probably what’s wrong with me. Why my head ain’t right. You’re too good to have those type of thoughts.”
“How do you know that? How good am I if I can’t even make my mother stay around for me?” Kamilla muttered, letting the tears fall freely.
Cairo repositioned himself in front of her and cupped her face. His thumbs swiped the tears away. “You can’t hold that. That’s not yours to hold. I couldn’t imagine anyone wanting to leave you if they could help it. You got me stuck and I don’t like nobody.”
Kamilla rolled her eyes, attempting to ward off the depth those words held. “It’s because something is wrong with you.”
“That might be true, but when you’ve seen darkness all your life, when the light comes, you hold on to that shit.”
Kamilla’s hands found his forearms and instead of fighting off whatever this was, she allowed herself to stay in this moment.
“I wish you could see what I do. What bitches like QaMeesha see. What they try to steal from you and can’t. It’s so fuckin’ beautiful, K. You know that?”
She nipped her lip and shook her head. “It’s been a very long time since I heard it or even felt it.”
“It’s in you. It’s worth protecting. And everyone can see it. Something that valuable, people want to heist. Trust me I know.”
She sniffled. “So what, you’re going to snatch it so no one else can have it?”
Cairo’s thumb lightly brushed over her bottom lip. “Nah.”
Kamilla shivered slightly under his touch. It was like an electric current shocked her heart back into rhythm. “Figured,” she quipped, attempting to move but her body was frozen.
“I’m protecting that. I’m protecting you.”
“And in exchange…” She tucked her lips.
Another swipe of his thumb released them. Then his lips met hers. Slow, unpretentious pecks that lingered. Three to be exact. A feeling she’d never had the luxury of having.
“I get to experience how beautiful life can get,” he replied, watching how her cheeks flushed red and she released his forearm to barely touch her lips. “Was that your first kiss?”
Embarrassed, Kamilla nodded. “The last person to kiss me was that annoying boy in the second grade and my daddy showed up ready to light the school up. I’ve never even had a boyfriend. Just been out here overlooked.”
He hummed, her chin still hooked in his fingers. “Well, I see you.”
“You kiss all the sad girls you bring to your crazy rock?” she taunted.
“Nah, just you,” he replied with a laugh, releasing her. “It’ll probably only ever be you.”
“Don’t get too far ahead of yourself. You might get tired of being my friend,” Kamilla muttered.
Cairo grabbed her hand and kissed the back of it, giving her a wink. “I won’t.”
She allowed her head to find his shoulders again and watched the water hit the shore. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. You’re good here.”
Kamilla’s smile was faint. “You remind me of my dad.”
“Must’ve been a great guy,” Cairo joked, refusing to reveal the pieces of her he’d put together.
“He was the best. Everyone knew him as AyeZee. I knew him as Kamaal Palmer. He was my world.”
“I’m sure you were his too.”