Chapter Forty-One – A.J. #2
“No! Lady Bird was,” I laugh. “I realized maybe Saoirse Ronan could make me just as happy as Chalamet.” Alexandra tries not to laugh.
“I’m kind of kidding. I liked boys first. But in high school, I ended up falling for my best friend, who was a girl.
And for a while, I really thought, ‘This is crazy, I like boys.’ But when she said she wanted to keep her distance because she was falling for me, my heart nearly stopped and I just kissed her.
I kissed her, held her, and it felt right. ”
I remember it fondly; it was special for me to realize I could love whoever I wanted and not be stuck in the box I was put in.
But Alexandra is clearly trying not to roll her eyes in jealousy, so I close that chapter and shift the focus to her.
“Now you know. But what about you? How’d you start? ” I ask.
“You already know, A.J. I’ve told you so many times,” she says, playing coy and resting her head on the back of the couch.
“I know you’re the girl who sang before she spoke, but tell me: how’d you start writing?” I prop my feet up on the couch and look at her.
“I never thought I’d sing pop until I joined GenZ.
When we debuted, our first album felt like magic, everything clicked, it was incredible.
” The smile that lights up her face almost makes me smile too.
“Then came the second album, and that was probably the most lifeless thing I’ve ever been part of.
Gui and I rewrote four of the songs and started singing the new versions at the shows.
The fans loved it and I realized that I wanted to do that . ”
I move closer just enough to intertwine my fingers with hers, gently.
“Did it take you long to write what you sing?”
“So long,” she says. “As you just saw, samba has so many classics. I wanted to honor them, you know?” Alex watches our hands intertwined, playing a little game of trying to catch my thumb with hers.
“With all those classics being passed down from one generation to the next, it never felt like it needed anything else. But at the end of the day, my heart convinced me it did.”
“It did need you,” I say. “I love hearing you sing, and I can’t wait for everyone to hear The Loneliest Girl in the City .”
“That’s not the title.”
“It’s not?”
“No. The title is Unbroken ,” she corrects me, and her face lights up.
Somehow, despite everything, I’ve been feeling more whole too since she showed up, taking over my life with her warmth, her smiles, her constant presence.
“I love it,” I say. “I think it says exactly what you wanted it to.”
“Thank you, A.J. I’d still be ‘the loneliest girl in the city’ if it weren’t for you. But then my Golden Boy showed up and turned all my walls into bridges. I’ll be grateful for that forever,” Alex says, and I reach for her, pulling her onto my lap.
“I love seeing you like this, so full of joy, so hopeful, so alive…”
“ I love seeing you ,” she says, kissing me softly and letting her hand find my hair, tugging out the messy bun just to run her fingers through it.
“I never thought you’d be like this, you know?”
“Like what?” She frowns, narrowing her eyes at me.
“So sweet, so affectionate… always with the cute nicknames.”
“I’m your little box of surprises, A.J.” she declares, and I lean my head against the back of the couch.
“I feel like I’m in heaven every time you say that, you know?” I confess, and she frowns at me. “When you call yourself mine.
“I think it’s sexy. But just a little,” she teases, her fingers playing along my waist.
“Speaking of us… We’re heading to Guilherme’s the day after tomorrow, right? Dani won’t stop asking, either,” I say, and she gives me a sidelong look, eyes narrowed like she’s trying to guess where I’m going with this. “But I haven’t told them anything…”
“Thalia asked me yesterday when the official dating announcement would be. She called me because I didn’t answer,” she admits.
“Should we call them?” I suggest, not because I want to make it a big thing, but because they’re our best friends, so maybe they deserve to know.
“To tell them?”
“If you’re not ready, it’s okay.”
“No, I want to. They deserve to know. It’s just…” She takes a deep breath and bites her lip. “We’re not exactly dating, so what do we even say? ‘Hi, we’re making out every day now’?”
“We’re not dating?” I laugh, genuinely surprised.
“You haven’t asked me to be your girlfriend.”
“No, but…”
“No official proposal, no label,” Alexandra says, holding up her hand to close the topic, and I laugh.
“Alright. Let’s just send them a message and tell the truth, what do you think?”
“I think… I like you. We’re happy. And it’s good to have people like them in our lives, people who care and love us so much,” she says, curling up on the couch with her legs tucked to the side, like she’s trying to protect herself from the weight of her own confession.
“But I’m loving this, and I’m sure you are too.
So maybe… we just stay here, enjoy the cold weather and rewatch an old movie,” she says, tucking a curl behind her ear, clearly trying to look calmer than she feels.
“And someday, when we feel comfortable, we send them a message and tell them the truth.”
“That we’re in love, but I can’t call you my girlfriend because I haven’t asked?”
“Exactly!” Alexandra says, jumping up to grab the remote and start browsing for a movie, and I just watch her, moving around my place like she’s always belonged here.
She sits down again, leaning into me like it’s the most natural thing in the world, a quiet reminder that I’m hers, and this is our life now.
And maybe it’s nothing. But I hope that after everything we’ve faced with our families, this is just the first step toward someday seeing her as my family too the one I chose, the one I want to build with love and admiration, day by day.