Chapter 2
Hattie
"You have some explaining to do," my friend Jovie hissed before she turned to ask the next customer how she could help.
I couldn't believe that Rowan had declared me to be his fiancée in front of a reporter. The entire town would know by the end of the night.
My hands shook as I tried to focus on serving hot chocolate to the line of people at my table. I couldn't hide in my truck tonight. I was exposed to everyone at the Hart's Holiday Illuminary.
We didn't even talk anymore. No one would believe that we'd secretly dated and were engaged.
We'd have to be seen around town, holding hands, eating out, and attending holiday events.
I'd spent years avoiding the man I was now engaged to.
No one was going to believe it.
After Rowan pressed the button on the lights, the band took the stage and started playing. A few couples were dancing under a canopy of lights.
I had to admit that the Harts' property was magical tonight. As a general rule, I avoided the Harts. I specifically avoided Rowan Hart.
The line slowed as more people broke away to step onto the dance floor.
Rowan appeared in front of me, startling me out of my reverie. "Will you dance with me?"
Jovie nudged me with her shoulder. "Go. I've got this."
She wasn't officially an employee. She was a friend who asked to be paid in hot chocolate. It was a small price to pay to have help on a busy night.
Not seeing a way out of it, I walked around the table and put my hand in Rowan's. Ever since he'd gotten over the panic of naming me as his fiancée, he'd seemed relaxed, as if he was pleased with this arrangement. He shouldn't be happy about being forced to spend time together. I certainly wasn't.
He led me onto the dance floor, gripping my hand tightly as if he was stopping me from running. But where would I go? My hot-cocoa table was a few feet away, and my livelihood, my truck, was parked in the lot.
It didn't escape my notice that people turned to look at us as we walked. Any woman on Rowan's arm would have gotten a second look, but me? I wasn't anyone special. But people had whispered enough about my father over the years.
The crowd parted for him because he was a Hart. His family owned the property. The festival was set up in front of the inn and restaurant, the signs declaring them to be the Harts' prominently displayed and outlined with lights. As usual, I felt less than when I was too close to the Harts.
When we reached the center of the dance floor, he turned, resting one hand one my hip and the other held my free one.
He dipped his head. "Our first dance as an engaged couple."
I shook my head and looked away. "If that's what you want to call it."
He raised a brow. "Careful. You don't want people thinking we're having our first fight."
"As of a few minutes ago, no one even knew we were a thing." And I desperately wanted to travel back in time to when I was blissfully unaware of what awaited me.
He pulled me closer, and I didn't resist. He smelled faintly of hops and pine, the perfect combination. There was a line of scruff on his chin that I wanted to trace with my finger and then my tongue.
I was hot standing this close to him.
"We have to show everyone that we're a real couple." His voice was deeper than I remembered, and it shifted something in my chest.
This is why it was dangerous to be this close to him. He saw me. I had to stay away from him if I wanted to keep everything locked down. "I don't even have a ring." I wasn't sure why I said that. The last thing I wanted was to delve deeper into his crazy plan to be an engaged couple.
Instead of telling me I was crazy, he said, "I'll have to see if there's a family ring I can use. But I have a feeling Gran's ring would go to Clara since she's living in her house and running her business."
"Oh, we don't need to ask anyone for a ring." A family ring would make everything more real.
"It would explain why we don't have a ring yet. We can tell everyone we wanted to wait and ask my parents if there's a ring I can put on your finger."
I felt a chill, and I swayed slightly in his arms. "This is too much."
He held me more tightly. "This is my fault. I'll get us through it."
I couldn't believe I was dancing with Rowan Hart at the Hart Holiday Illuminary after his announcement that we were engaged. I was in so much trouble.
Rowan's sister, Clara, was dating Malcolm's college friend, Beck.
Otherwise, none of the Hart brothers had settled down with anyone.
The fact that Rowan was the first to get engaged was a big deal.
There would be a lot of disgruntled single women who lost out on their chance at the brother who was opening the brewery.
There was something sexy about someone who could brew their own beers.
Or maybe I thought that because my chosen career was making hot chocolate.
When we were kids, I was close to Rowan until I pushed him away. It was for a good reason. I couldn't be close to Rowan. Not with everything going on in my family. He didn't need to be in my world, and I couldn't taint his.
My life had taken a dramatic turn after I turned thirteen, and I couldn't drag Rowan into it. For years, I was in a dark place, and then circumstances had only gotten worse.
I'd created a business with my hot chocolate truck, and even if I never got the storefront I wanted, I'd be okay. I kept to myself and worked hard. But Rowan had thrust me into the public eye, and I didn't like it.
I didn't want to be scrutinized by everyone. I didn't want the questions and rumors that came with it. Rowan had no idea what he'd unleashed when he named me as his fiancée.
"You always overanalyzed everything."
His face was way too close to mine. Didn't he understand the need for personal space?
My heart was beating an irregular rhythm, my skin was tingling with awareness, and my nose was filled with his scent.
This arrangement was already wreaking havoc on my nervous system, and we'd only shared one dance. "That's what you remember about me?"
He chuckled, and the sound reverberated through my chest. "It's not the only thing. Just one of them."
"So I overanalyze everything. What else?"
"I'm not going to tell you in one dance. We have weeks to share our lives with each other. I intend to take my time to get to know this Hattie Collins."
He was getting into dangerous territory. "Why do you care?"
He tipped his head to the side, his voice light. "I'm surprised you had to ask. We're engaged now. It's only appropriate that I know things about my future wife."
There was something about that word wife that penetrated my heart. It was an intense sensation that made it difficult to breathe. "It's only pretend."
"Mmm," he hummed noncommittally as he spun me away from him.
The sudden movement had my stomach spinning in time with the motion. When he spun me back into his arms, I was pressed against him, way too close for comfort. I felt every ridge of his muscles.
He'd filled out since we were friends. He was big all over, and I wanted to explore his body. I felt weak as he continued to hold me, slowly moving around the makeshift dance floor.
Why was I thinking about Rowan's body? I didn't remember having those thoughts when we were friends, but then again, we were young then.
I just knew that Rowan got me like no one else did, and if I'd remained close to him, he would have seen inside my family and know what was going on. I couldn't let that happen.
His family was so good, so full of love, whereas mine felt more like a roller coaster I wanted to get off but couldn't. My only choice was who to take along with me, and I'd chosen no one.
I wanted to be alone. I wanted to handle everything by myself. And now, it felt like it was too late to catch him up on everything that had happened over the years. I was sure he'd heard things about my family but I wasn't the same person anymore, and I didn’t want to talk to him about it.
"If we do this, it's only surface level. Our story is that we were friends. We reconnected and realized we were—"
"In love," he added not so helpfully.
I swallowed hard. "Yes. That."
His brow furrowed. "You can't say the word? Haven't you been in love?"
It felt like all the air had been sucked from the universe. I couldn't seem to draw in a deep breath, and everything in my vision had narrowed until I only saw him. "I'm not sure how that matters."
"Oh, I think it very much matters. You're my fiancée after all. These are the things I should know about you."
I sighed. "It's not real, remember?"
He nodded sagely. "But we want to make it look as real as possible. I've always found that if you add more details it makes everything more believable."
"You make it a habit to lie?" I didn't remember that about him, but maybe he'd changed too.
"Have you met my brothers? Our childhood was one long game. One of us was always telling on another. We had to have our stories straight."
"Are you saying you lied to your parents?" I asked, pretending to be scandalized.
His expression was grim. "I did what I had to do at the time. I'm not saying I do it now."
"Except when it comes to your fiancée," I said dryly.
He slowed until we were just standing with me enclosed in his arms. "It's for a good cause, and once upon a time, we were friends."
I wrinkled my nose as if the idea was distasteful. "We're not anymore."
"What if I want to be friends again?" he asked softly.
I shook my head. "That's not how it works."
He raised a brow. "You think you can resist me?"
I had to shake my head, not sure what he was talking about. Was he asking if I could resist him as a friend or something more? There was no way he could mean anything else. We hadn't spoken in years.
"What's this I hear about you two being engaged?" a woman asked.
We both startled, but I recovered first. "Judy, I—"
Rowan put my hand in his, and we turned to face his mother together. "The reporter asked if I was seeing someone, and I couldn't keep it quiet any longer."
Judy looked from him to me, and I slowly nodded. "That's right."
"We're engaged." Rowan lifted my hand to his mouth and kissed it. "Hattie's my fiancée."
There was something about my name on his lips that had my heart thumping.
She clapped her hands together. "I'm delighted that you're engaged, and I can't wait to hear all about your relationship."
Hopefully, she wouldn't need to hear about it tonight, because we didn't have our stories straight.
If anyone questioned us, it would fall apart.
And no matter how annoyed I was about this arrangement, I didn't want to do anything to hurt Rowan.
It was bad enough that I had to do it back then. I wouldn't do it again.
He was finally living his dream, and I wouldn't be the one to ruin it.
"We'll have to tell you about it at family dinner," Rowan said smoothly.
Judy nodded. "That would be perfect."
"Do you need me to do anything now?" Rowan asked.
Judy nodded. "You're supposed to take the first carriage ride around the property."
Rowan squeezed my hand. "The carriage rides are a recent addition to the property. We offer them on special occasions, and tonight they are lit with lights. Would you like to join me?"
"Of course," I said, because it was expected that we would ride together as a couple. How would I survive being alone with him? At least on the dance floor, we were surrounded by watchful eyes. In the carriage, we'd be alone, and I wouldn't' be able to evade his questions.
I felt like I was going to pass out at any second.
"Let's get you some hot chocolate for the ride," Rowan said as he bid his mother goodbye and led me over to my table.
There was no line, because everyone was moving toward the carriages that were lined up. The horses were clopping their feet and snorting.
Jovie raised a brow. "You two looked cozy."
I hoped I conveyed that we'd talk about this later.
Rowan drew me to his side. "Can we have some hot cocoa for our ride?"
Jovie reached under the table and grabbed my thermos with two cups. "Let me fill this up for you."
"We don't need the thermos," I said weakly.
Jovie's brows rose even farther. "You're going on a romantic carriage ride. You'll need your sustenance. Speaking of which, I have those hot-cocoa cookies you baked earlier. Let me grab those."
Jovie dropped to her knees, rifling through the box we kept under the table.
"You make cookies too?" Rowan asked.
"It was just something I tried. We're not selling them or anything." I felt oddly exposed, having him know what I was doing for my business.
"I can't wait to taste them," he said as Jovie handed him the thermos, two cups, and a small tin of cookies. "This is perfect, Jovie. Thank you."
He pulled out cash, and Jovie waved him away.
"You're family now."
"We're not—" I said as Rowan thanked Jovie and led me away from the table.
"Would Jovie charge your real fiancé?"
I rolled my eyes. "I haven't been engaged, so I have no idea."
"If this is going to work, you have to go with the flow."
I should be good at that. My life was a series of bumps in the road and unexpected turns.
Instead, I preferred routine and quiet. I didn't like anything that interrupted my life and threw me off balance.
Rowan was proving to be a wrecking ball.
"You know, I was going to sell hot chocolate tonight and then go home to sleep.
I didn't plan on dancing or carriage rides. "
Rowan grinned. "You have to stick with me if you want something unexpected."
"I'm not a fan of the unexpected," I said before I could stop myself.
He glanced over at me. "I really appreciate you going along with this. I'm happy to return the favor."
I sighed heavily. "If I ever need a fake fiancé, I'll know who to call."
"I meant if you need anything, anything at all, I'll do my best to give it to you."
Why did his words hit somewhere deep inside me? I tended to go it alone and not ask for help. I didn’t like to rely on anyone. My therapist would tell me it had something to do with my father. But I wasn't going to tell Rowan that. "It's fine."
He gave me a look like he knew my response was a cop-out, but thankfully, he didn't push any harder.
We'd reached the first carriage in line, and he set our things inside before helping me into the seat. Once we were settled, he put the heavy throw over our laps and poured the hot cocoa into two cups with lids.
I accepted the hot cocoa, eager to have something to do with my hands. I wasn't sure what an engaged couple was expected to do on a carriage ride. Hold hands? Kiss? Probably talk about our future.
I couldn't believe that Rowan had gotten me into this situation. I didn't want to share my life with him, and I didn't want to pretend that I was in love with him. It was an impossible situation, but I'd have to get used to it.
I had to endure the holiday season with Rowan Hart.
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