Chapter 6
Chapter Six
Annahi
Throwing the covers back, I give up trying to sleep. My mind won’t let me. I keep hearing the voices from two days ago on repeat. I don’t understand why the thoughts of those shifters are haunting me. It’s never happened to me before.
After the surgery I assisted Zaid with, I finished my shift, helped out until the others got in, and then I went home. My body and mind had been exhausted, though I hadn’t slept. I haven’t been able to. Though my mind is exhausted, my thoughts won’t let me rest.
Unable to think properly, not with everything filling my head the way it is.
Maybe I could ask my mother. That might be a bad idea, though. Granted, she’ll listen, but only so she can criticize me for my lacklusterness.
I don’t really have anyone else to turn to. I could maybe talk to Clara, and she’ll listen, still, she won’t be able to help me.
Needing a distraction, I decide to get dressed and go out. A walk in nature would be good. It makes me feel good when I’m out in the woods.
It’s like when I’m in the woods, there’s no reason to think. I can just be.
Weird.
I know.
Regardless, it might help with getting the voices to finally ease in my head. The rage in all the thoughts is what’s driving me mad.
Maybe I should head to the psychic shop in town. I could possibly get more of the herbal tea that would help me when I couldn’t stop the thoughts from lingering.
Nodding to myself, I make a plan for what I’m going to do. It’s what I need to do to be honest. The herbal tea works for me, and I’m going to need it if I’m going to get rid of the voices filling my head right now.
Dressing in a pair of black yoga leggings, an oversized sweater that droops off my shoulder, socks, and my black and white Adidas. I grab my cross-body bag and make my way out the door, making sure to lock it behind me.
I don’t ever leave my little house unlocked. It invites trouble, and I don’t want to come home to find anyone uninvited lying in wait for me. Like my mom. Though I highly doubt she’d come over. She always demands I come to her when she wishes to see me.
Sighing, I shove the thought away. I have enough in my mind right now to have to add more to it.
I leave my car in the driveway and start walking toward town.
I was far enough away to need to drive most places, being on the outskirts of town.
Going to the psychic shop I usually would drive, but walking will do me good.
I grab my AirPods out of my bag, plug them in, and start walking as I find something to listen to on my phone.
I settle for “All The Magic” by Karliene.
I love all sorts of music, but my go-to are songs by Karliene, Erutan, Blackmore’s Night, Elane, Patty Gurdy, Eurielle, Gustavo Steiner, and so on. The music is beautiful and speaks to me. Calms my mind most of the time.
It takes me forty-five minutes to walk to the shop. When I get there, I pull the AirPods from my ears, put them in their case, and head into the shop.
“Good day,” a woman calls out, and I look in the direction of the woman to find she wasn’t alone. Nor was she the same woman I’ve seen in the past.
“Ugh . . .” I trail off as I look at the man with her. What was weird was that I couldn’t hear either of them, and the thoughts that were in my head vanished. Like . . . goddess knows I’m not sure exactly how to explain it. It just stopped completely.
Weird.
The only time it’s happened similarly was the other night at the clinic.
“I’m Sibley. How may I help you?” the woman says, coming from around the counter. The man she’d been talking to stayed where he was and kept quiet, though his eyes remained on me. They were beautiful eyes. The same as . . .
Oh goddess.
His eyes were the same as the coyote from the clinic.
Does that mean this man . . .
No, it can’t be. It’s too much of a coincidence.
Right?
“I . . . ugh . . . I’m just looking for the herbal tea I usually get from Arely,” I explain a bit nervously. More than a bit. More like a lot nervously.
Sibley nods and looks to the man. My heart thumps in my chest. It feels like it might burst from within me. I take an unsteady breath as Sibley looks back at me and stretches an arm toward the man at the counter. “This is Justice. A friend of mine.”
“I wouldn’t call us friends,” Justice grunts, his lip twitching, and I wonder if the two of them are . . .
“Oh, but we are, and you know it.” Sibley snickers. “It’s why you came to see me.”
“I’ll, umm, just grab what I need.” The last thing I want to do is hear two lovers teasing one another.
Turning from Sibley, I go in search of the herbal tea Arely recommended for me. I knew what the bag looked like. I didn’t need help finding it.
“You must be Annahi,” Sibley says, coming to stand at my side.
I tense and look at her once again. “How do you know my name?” Arely had explained how she knew my name before I told her. She’d been nice. I remember her thoughts had been all positive. Nothing negative. Not once in the times I’d come into the store.
Now I couldn’t hear either of the occupants’ thoughts or the haunting whispers of the ones days ago.
“I know your name because, like Arely, I’ve a gift.” Sibley smiles brightly.
“You’re also a pain in the fuckin’ ass,” Justice remarks, straightening from his slouch against the counter.
“Oh, but you so enjoy our bantering,” Sibley teases.
I do my best to ignore this and how it makes my heart feel dejected. Something I don’t understand. Why would I feel such a way when . . . no . . . I refuse even to finish that question in my head.
I grab a couple of bags of tea and head for the register. Sibley walks beside me, then around the counter to the register.
“Will this be everything?” she asks.
“Yes,” I answer stiffly, feeling Justice right there. More than aware of his closeness.
Sibley looks between Justice and me while ringing me up, thankfully, she doesn’t say anything. “Here you go.” Sibley hands me a black paper bag with my receipt inside. “If you ever need anything, feel free to come back.”
“Thank you.” I nod and head for the door.
“Oh, Annahi,” Sibley calls when I reach for the handle.
“Yes?” I twist enough to look at her.
“Don’t be afraid of the dark when it comes.
The lightness will come through. All journeys must be tested first.” Sibley glances toward Justice, then back to me, and finishes with, “Trust when the time comes, it’ll be worth it.
Mates are meant to be for a reason. Balance, truth, love, strength, they will be what brings you both together. ”
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to take it. Instead of thinking, I give her a jerky nod and open the door. The moment it closes behind me, voices storm into my mind once again, and I can barely keep myself from stumbling. Let alone falling.
Sucking in a breath, I manage to make my way down the street. I pull my AirPods out and put them back in my ears to try to help with music, but it doesn’t work.
By the time I get back home, I’m barely feeling sane. My body vibrates with the noise in my head. The voices are hard to ignore.
I find myself wondering not for the first time about ending it all. This time, though, the thought is more than just a wonder. Without thinking about anything, I drop the bag on the table, I keep my purse and keys, and move to the kitchen.
There’s one way I can end the voices in my head. I grab the first knife I come across in the butcher block. It’s a paring knife, but sharp. I’ve got a thing for knives being sharp. If it’s not, it won’t slice through fruit as it should. Instead, it will rip and tear.
Sliding to my floor, I don’t bother thinking.
If I start, I’ll overthink, and thinking alongside the voices raging through my head is more than I can handle.
I simply lift my wrist and slice upward.
You’d think it would hurt, but it was like a relief.
I do the same to my other wrist and drop the knife to watch the blood pooling from the cuts I created.
I knew it wouldn’t be long before it was over. I could already feel the voices waning in my head. Their haunting rage leaving me. I close my eyes and wait for the end to come for me.