Chapter 8
Had Kaden found a way for him to exist in this world? Joe didn’t know. What he did know was the longer he stayed inside Kaden, the more dangerous it became for them both.
Joe was growing. He could feel his presence knitting deeper, the integration strengthening.
If he remained in him, stayed silent, he could keep Kaden healthy and prolong his life, at least for a while.
But the cost would be Kaden himself. His essence would erode, and Joe didn’t know how long it would take before it was more his body than Kaden’s.
Maybe survival outside of Kaden was impossible. But if Joe stayed inside him, Kaden would eventually break or others would decide he’d broken. How could Kaden ever have a boyfriend while his body was occupied by someone else?
Worse still, Joe didn’t want him to have a boyfriend.
Kaden was his.
The thought was dangerous. Selfish. Illogical.
Joe knew that. And yet, with every fibre of his being, he wanted Kaden as his mate.
He didn’t understand the thought. He shouldn’t have had it.
He wouldn’t have had it as 294. Joe had changed.
Was still changing. He couldn’t tell Kaden how much he cared for him, at least not without frightening him.
Not without destroying what little peace Kaden still had.
Joe had to come out of him. And Kaden had to be kept safe. Then, Joe could tell him how he felt. He’d have to pick his moment. And if it all went well, he’d go and see Harris and find out if Gash and Lanu were inside him. Though what he’d do if they were there he wasn’t sure. Or if they weren’t.
Kaden had already done more than anyone had the right to ask.
And Joe hadn’t asked, he’d taken. Forced his way in.
Not hurt him in the way Harris had, but close enough that Joe could no longer pretend otherwise.
He understood now just how awful that violation had been.
Harris was a bad person. Joe wasn’t. Or at least, he didn’t believe he was.
He was kind. Like Kaden. Well, learning to be kind.
Kindness—giving it or receiving it—was something Joe had never known.
In his world, his only value had been as protection for his other.
Lanu had been his third assignment. The other two had reached their release date and he’d been reassigned.
Lanu had been the worst other he’d ever known.
Those like him seemed happy with their roles in general.
Not all, but most. Maybe it was Joe who’d been wrong somehow, expecting more than he’d received.
His purpose had been to preserve his other’s life at the expense of his own.
Gratitude had no place in that arrangement.
He was never thanked. No one needed to be kind to him, so no one was.
But they should have been.
I’m different. I was different as 294 and I’m changing every day.
Now, for the first time, he stood on the edge of a different kind of world, one where everyone was valued, or should be valued. And he didn’t know how to exist in it without risking the one person who mattered the most.
But there was more to be done before that happened.
More to learn. More to think about. He’d assumed the others in the tank were dead because he needed that to be true.
But what if it wasn’t? If they were still in the building, Joe would know.
He’d feel them. Perhaps Kaden should go back to the lab.
He implanted the idea of checking for the remains of the craft while Kaden slept.
But going to the lab was not the first thing on Joe’s mind when Kaden woke.
Sex was. Joe had woken earlier than Kaden and wished he could properly wrap his arms around him, hold him, touch him, be outside him.
Kaden’s cock was hard and Joe couldn’t resist. He wanted to give Kaden another mind-blowing orgasm.
Never mind that he got to experience it too.
This time, he made Kaden feel as if his cock was inside a warm, wet mouth.
Kaden gasped as Joe sucked. Not all his time online had been spent looking at immigration.
Please don’t tell me to stop!
He didn’t. Everything that Joe did, Kaden liked, judging by the sounds coming from his mouth and the way his hips were rising up from the mattress.
It was…glorious.
And Joe wished Kaden was coming in his mouth and not onto his own stomach.
One day.
They both slept again and Joe made it feel as if he had his arms around Kaden. He hoped Kaden could feel it too.
~~~
“Maybe we should go to Lixian Biotech and see if we can find the remains of your spaceship,” Kaden said.
Yes. That’s a good idea.
Kaden had meant to say something about the blowjob Joe had somehow managed to give him, but Lixian had pushed its way out of his mouth.
Really, he thought he should have considered going back sooner.
He didn’t want to take an Uber and leave a record of his journey there.
It was two bus journeys and a bit of a walk, and it would be less likely that he’d be remembered using public transport.
Except, if he was seen near the lab, what could he say?
Does Harris have anything of yours that you want back?
“No. I wouldn’t go to his place of work to ask him if there was.”
Then speak to his boss. Take the article to show him.
Uh oh. Kaden was suspicious. “Did you put the idea of going to the lab in my head? Do you have a reason for wanting to be back in the building?”
Joe laughed. You’re smart. Yes. So that I can feel if anyone is still alive.
“Oh.” Kaden gulped. “And what if they are?”
Ask for another look round.
“And if they are?”
We’ll have to do something about it.
Oh God.
Kaden printed off the article. He thought about calling for an appointment but Harris’ boss, Martin Walker, might just tell him to email what he’d written.
As Kaden travelled there, he hoped the guy was in because if not, he’d have to ask to speak to Harris. If Joe thought it was important to get in the building, then he’d have to find a way to get in. But even the thought of speaking to Harris made him bite his nails—until Joe stopped him.
Biting nails achieves nothing.
“It comforts me.”
When he caught a woman on the bus staring at him, he reminded himself not to speak out loud.
What sort of fun things do people do when they’re in a relationship?
Was Joe trying to distract him? Dining out, the cinema, concerts, walks, adventures…
And sometimes hearts get broken?
Not literally. I’ll stream some romantic movies for you to watch.
Thank you.
Though he’d have to be careful with gay ones because many didn’t end happily.
Why not?
I’ll tell you later.
Malcolm stepped forward as Kaden went through the door at Lixian.
“Hi,” Kaden said. “I wondered if Mr Walker could spare me a few minutes.”
“Do you have an appointment?”
“No. It won’t take long.” Please don’t let Harris see me.
Malcolm picked up his phone and spoke into it, then turned back to Kaden. “He’s sending someone down. I think I still have your ID in the desk. Come through the scanner.”
He beeped at him again and this time Kaden made sure he laughed.
“Still detecting that alien lifeform.” Malcolm grinned.
What? How?
He’s joking.
Malcolm checked Kaden’s backpack, then handed him the ID.
Kaden didn’t recognise the woman who emerged from the lift. But she took him up to the top floor and showed him into the CEO’s office.
“Can’t stay away?” Martin smiled and offered Kaden his hand.
“No. Sorry to bother you but I’ve written the article and I wondered if you’d make sure you’re happy with it before I submit it.” He took it from his backpack and held it out.
“Take a seat.”
Kaden perched on the chair. Martin laughed several times as he read it and Kaden quietly exhaled.
Are you sensing anything?
No.
Martin put the sheet of paper down. “It’s good. Thank you. You could have emailed it.”
“I wanted to be sure you were okay with it.”
“Or given it to Harris.”
“We’re not on speaking terms.”
“Ah. The reason for his broken nose?”
“Is that what he said?” Kaden didn’t hide his shock.
“He walked into a door.”
“That was clumsy of him.”
“It was.”
“The plan was that Harris would read the article but I don’t want to see him again. He came to see me and told me some material had gone missing the day I visited. He wasn’t accusing me. He said it had been in the tank when I left but…” Not quite.
He hoped he was opening the door for Malcolm to talk about it.
“Three pieces missing. Seven incinerated. But we were sure there were ten originally. The lab’s been deep cleaned. I’m satisfied there’s no problem.”
Kaden pushed to his feet and Martin handed him the paper.
“Thanks for letting me have a look around. I know you didn’t have to.”
“If it keeps the animal rights protestors away…”
“I hope it helps. But people will believe what they want to believe.”
Martin shook Kaden’s hand. “I love Crunchy Nut Flakes.”
Kaden laughed. “Me too.”
He still had a smile on his face as he went down in the lift. Right until the door slid open on the second floor and Harris stepped in. He didn’t look surprised to see him so Kaden assumed Malcolm had blabbed. There were bruises under both Harris’ eyes and his nose looked swollen.
Don’t stand near him.
Kaden moved back.
Harris pressed the button to close the door. “What are you doing here?”
“I brought the article for your boss to read.”
“You were supposed to give it to me.”
“I never wanted to see you again.”
“You broke my nose.”
“And we’re still not even.” The door opened and Kaden stepped out.
“No, we’re not, you little shit,” Harris hissed behind him, but he didn’t follow as Kaden left the building.
His heart was racing as he walked across the car park. Did you detect anything?
Head into the woods.
If anyone was watching, he hoped this looked as if he was taking a short cut to the main road.
Left.
Kaden followed Joe’s directions until he told him to stop.
Somewhere here.
“How big is it?”