Chapter Fourteen #3
I think about it for a minute, grinning when I come up with the perfect emoji to answer him.
I tap out the chicken emoji and send it through, waiting to see his response.
Ryder: WTF? Are you telling me to count cock?
I laugh because I can just imagine his shock, his voice.
Kane: No, I’m telling you to count roosters. You know, they rise with the sun…
Ryder: Seriously?
The laugh that escapes me is genuine.
Kane: Cock-a-doodle-doo.
I send him a winking emoji and the laughing one too.
Kane: Or you could just make yourself a coffee. Last I checked, that helps keep one awake.
The little dots appear and disappear again. Several times before another text comes through, almost as if he wasn’t sure what to say, or how to say it perhaps.
Ryder: I’d rather make you a coffee.
My cheeks heat, my heart skips a beat. It’s just a text, albeit a flirtatious one, but something about the words feel monumental. Larger than life.
There are plenty of ways I could respond to him. I could be cheeky and brush him off with something humorous. I could tell him to make himself a coffee and I think he would. He seems to like it when I tell him what to do.
But something about his text feels more like a question, or like he’s trying to say something else.
Kane: Is that so?
Ryder sends back an emoji with a kissy face and my body flushes with heat.
He is flirting with me, the little devil. I grin as he texts back.
Ryder: Yes, Sir.
Another kissy face, and then a text that renders me as frozen as it does with warmth.
Ryder: I like talking to you.
I like talking to him, too.
Kane: What time are you done today?
Ryder: 3.
I glance at the clock, noting it’s nearly two. That’s an hour.
Which isn’t much time to get downtown, but it’s doable.
Kane: Got any plans tonight?
I watch the texts disappear and reappear three times before he says no.
No, he doesn’t have plans.
Which means he’s free.
I know asking him out is probably a bad idea given the circumstances, but I can’t deny that the thought of hanging out, talking to Ryder, is enticing in a way I’ve never felt. I have a feeling seeing him, hearing him, talking to him…
Will make me feel better, if only for a little bit.
Maybe for the both of us.
Kane: We should hang out, then. Grab some dinner and talk.
That is what friends do. They hang out. Eat dinner together. Talk.
I can’t remember the last time Carter and I just hung out. Got a beer. Talked about dumb, meaningless shit. Probably not since before he met Nash.
I could tell Ryder about the cats. About Pumpkin, maybe.
See if he might want to adopt one or if he knows anyone who might.
When he doesn’t answer right away, I think maybe I just fucked up.
So I try to smooth it over so it doesn’t sound like I’m coming on too strong. Make sure he knows this isn’t a date.
Because it’s totally not a date. It’s just two friends doing friendly things friends do.
Kane: Since you like talking so much.
I send him a wink emoji just to be funny, but realize as he messages back, how painful the truth actually is. I am afraid he’ll say no, but… I can handle rejection. If anything, I’m used to it.
Even when I was in school, I didn’t hang out with my peers. I was a bit of a loner. Kept to myself. I liked it better that way. Aside from a couple hook ups at a few parties and sneaking out to go to clubs and get drunk and laid, I realize I’ve never actually been on a date.
A real date, anyway.
And suddenly the fear magnifies because I think I do want this to be a date.
Shit.
Ryder’s text chimes, pulling my momentary focus.
Ryder: I’d like that.
A wave of relief hits me, and it’s like the air has been knocked out of me.
He’d like that.
To hang out with me. Grab some dinner with me.
And that fact is enough to chases the anxiety away for the briefest moment.
Ryder wants to hang out with me!
Ryder: See you when I get off.
Before I can text him back, he sends a string of texts through, each one more embarrassing and hilarious than the last.
Ryder: WORK
Ryder:’ When get off WORK I mean
Ryder: Not the other get off
Ryder: NVM forget that. I’m cancelling. I’m going to my funeral tonight.
I laugh, really laugh.
That seems to happen a lot around Ryder.
It feels good, and for the first time, I embrace that. I don’t know if this is a date, but it could be. So I text him back, smirking as I do so. Date or not, I’m going to enjoy this moment, because he said yes.
Kane: If you’re a good boy for me tonight and behave, maybe I will reward you.
He doesn’t answer, and for a moment I think I fucked up. Made it weird, awkward. That’s not hard to do sometimes over text where it can be easy to misconstrue people’s words since you can’t hear them.
Way to go Kane.
But before I can set my phone down in shame and chastise myself for being too forward, too bold, two words appear on my screen.
Ryder: Yes, Sir.
And as I smile, relishing in those words like they are my salvation.
Because for the first time in what might be forever, I think I’m actually excited to see what happens next.