49. Maggie
49
maggie
“I wasn’t supposed to see you for an hour!” I toss my arms around him so excited to see him, and I kiss the hell out of him without him even getting a breath. I go all in and there is tongue but it’s not the good tongue.
“Out with-it moody boy,” I say, putting my hands on my hips. “I don’t like how your face looks when I’ve just kissed you. Shouldn’t that be a happier face than the one you’re showing me?”
“Mags, we need to talk.”
“Nope.” I shake my head as my stomach bottoms out.
“Maggie.”
He reaches for me, but I back away from him because this is how it started before “Please tell me you did not knock up another ex-girlfriend?”
I start fretting and walking around, shaking out my hands and staving off an epic panic attack that I went all in again and got fucked over. Again.
I am going to riot. Toss things and I’d loot if it weren’t my house. Well, the AirBnB, I’d just have to pay for whatever I break or steal. A monthish and I go all in like nothing’s ever happened, and it’s all fucking perfect. What’s wrong with me? This man is a warlock that’s got me trapped in a crystal or something. Takes me out when he wants, and I’m about to get shoved back in cursed amethyst or something. “Are you a warlock?”
“What? Maggie. Wait, what? You have to hear me out.” I shake my head and step around the living room.
I don’t know what to do. Is he really breaking up with me? Are we doomed? I don’t want to be doomed. I deserve undooming.
“I get my second fucking chance.” I stomp. “Is there another knocked up woman in the wings? How many babies, Colt? How many babies do I have to wait through? Jeeze, I’ll be like sixty when you’re done with your mountain of public baby raising.” He’s shaking his head.
He laughs as he says, “Focus, Maggie, you are my only other ex-girlfriend except for Laura Delay from second grade. And as far as I know you’re not pregnant.”
I slump on the bottom step and stare at him. And there’s another fucking silent conversation we’re having with only a look.
I’m in love with him, and I care so much for Daisy and Sloane. I back down all my hackles and walk around. Then I cross the room and sit on the edge of the couch and realize what we did on that couch arm yesterday afternoon so I move to a chair. He lets me be restless, nervous and undone. I know exactly why he’s doing this. There’s only one reason. The same fucking reason he does everything and it’s why I love him so damn much.
“Can I talk to them?” I clench my hands in front of me and look up at him. My voice cracks for a moment as I try to reconcile that it’s the girls who don’t like me or don’t want me with him.
He crosses his arms over his chest and says, “Not a great idea right now. Daisy needs to calm down. She always does. She’ll come to you eventually, I believe. But I’m not sure she’ll ever see this as okay.” He pinches the bridge of his nose and then his voice cracks a bit. “Fuck. I can’t do this. Not even a little bit. Just give me some time to sort this out. A couple of months.”
He sits on the coffee table across from me. I should sob, but my brain moves in a different direction. One I’ve not been to before. Regular Maggie would bow out and make sure everyone is okay. She’d send him home with an apology for loving him and lemon bars for the girls. But new Maggie, complete Maggie, can’t.
“Nope. I reject this. Fuck off.” I walk away from him into the kitchen.