1. The Phoenix
The Phoenix
Chapter 1
Two Weeks Earlier
It’s startling how fast life can change—how quickly you can go from whole to a million broken fragments, tumbling along the ground and breaking into dust. That’s what happened to me three years ago when my husband, Daniel, died in a car crash, leaving me and Evie, our then five-year-old daughter, to navigate life without him. After three years of being without him, I was not sure if I would ever be able to move on.
Dawn cast a gentle glow across the small cottage kitchen as I stared out the window, but even as sunshine painted my face with its joyous rays, he was all I could think about. I did not believe in an afterlife, but I couldn’t help but wonder if he was watching over us—if he knew how hard his little girl fought against cancer—how hard she had been fighting. Evie had been in remission for five months, but I wondered every day if the cancer was back and hiding from us. It haunted me like a bomb with a retractable fuse, except I wasn’t the one holding the lighter. I couldn’t even find the fuse.
Our new home in the mountains of Alabama was so different from my downtown New Orleans apartment, but I loved it. It was the perfect place to raise my little girl. It was far away from the hustle and bustle of a city that moved too fast, a city that was plagued with too much crime and natural disasters that sent us running multiple times per year like birds flying away from the seasons that did not suit them.
I moved quietly, trying not to wake Evelyn, acutely aware of the peaceful stillness that enveloped the house without the incessant horns of taxis outside our windows. I cracked eggs into the sizzling pan, the aroma of butter and bacon filling the air, making my stomach grumble. It definitely beat the hospital food that had all started to taste like cardboard after a while. The steady rhythm of my morning routine provided a comforting anchor in a world that had once been untethered by grief.
“Mommy?” A sleepy voice drifted in from the hallway, pulling a smile onto my lips. After so many months of not having my little girl at home, I cherished every moment we had together. Just thinking about how I could have lost her forever threatened to send me into a downward spiral that I would never crawl out of, so I pushed the what-ifs away, instead focusing on making every moment with her as special as I could. Cancer was a relentless foe, but Evie was a warrior.
“Good morning, nugget.” Turning off the burner, I watched as Evelyn appeared around the corner, the stuffed llama Ethan had brought her the last time she was in the Intensive Care Unit clutched tightly in her arms. She padded over to the table, dragging her feet in fluffy bunny slippers.
As she sat down, I measured out her medications, a morning routine we had perfected over countless months.
“It tastes yucky, Mommy.” Watching me with her usual scowl, Evie shook her head. She responded the same way every day, but we both knew she would take her medicine in the end. She had no other choice if she was going to stay in remission.
I smiled, setting the bottle back on the counter. “Like the nastiest goblin brew, but it’s making you strong, my little warrior.”
Her blue eyes searched mine, seeking assurance in a world upended too soon. “Strong like you?”
The question took me by surprise, considering I was never more than two seconds from unraveling. “Stronger.”
Once she had bravely downed her medicine and taken a big gulp of her vanilla almond milk to wash it down, I returned to the stove to finish making breakfast. My heart swelled with love as I prepared her food on her favorite plate, ensuring every detail was perfect—the strawberries sliced in bite-sized pieces so she would not choke, and her toast buttered just how she liked it.
“Here you go, baby. Eat up. We’ve got a big day ahead.”
As she nibbled, I fitted her hairpiece on her still nearly bald head, pulling the sides back in a braid and finishing it in a big pink bow.
“Is Uncle Ethan coming for breakfast too?” she asked, a milk mustache coloring the top of her lip.
Right on cue, the sound of a familiar engine rumbled outside, and moments later my brother sauntered in, his black hair disheveled and tattoos peeking out from his rolled-up sleeves. With late spring setting in, it was getting too hot for his typical black hoodie, not that he didn’t still wear it the majority of the time.
“Morning, Cara. Morning, munchkin.” A goofy grin spread across his lips as he crossed the room and lifted Evie from her chair, her squeal nearly popping my eardrums. She thrashed, but it only made him tickle her harder, her wig barely holding on.
“Put me down, silly goose!”
Chuckling, he plopped her back into her chair and sat beside her.
“Saved you some eggs and bacon,” I said, sliding a plate across the table, followed by a mug of black coffee. It felt like a ritual, this shared meal we had most mornings, a silent nod to the new life we were steadily building in Alabama, far from the turmoil that once consumed us. “Is Scarlett at the store?”
Already chewing his food, he nodded, the love for his new wife written all over his face. There was still so much I didn’t know about how they’d met, but what I did know was that their love was one I hoped for myself one day. It was a force that could build and shatter worlds—just like I’d had with Daniel, turning my whole world upside down.
Thoughts of the man I still mourned flooded my mind again, tearing at the freshly stitched wound that still bled, so I did my best to push it back. Later. Later, when I was alone, I would let myself feel.
“Are you excited for school?” Ethan asked, his bright blue eyes settling on Evie, whose fingers were so sticky that I instinctively clenched my teeth, hoping she wouldn’t get any in her new wig.
“Uh-huh,” she mumbled between bites of her fruit, nodding enthusiastically.
“Good. You’re going to knock ’em dead today.” Taking another sip of his coffee, he returned his eyes to me. “You settling in okay at the bookstore? You seem to like it.”
“Better than okay.” I smiled, the thought of Tangled in the Pages Two, the bookstore he and Scarlett had just opened, sending warmth straight into my heart. “It’s like finding a piece of myself I thought I’d lost.”
Ethan nodded, understanding without needing further explanation. We’d both sacrificed pieces of ourselves along the way—his to the darkness, mine to despair. Yet here we were, piecing them back together, side by side, the only family we had left.
“Scarlett’s lucky to have you,” he said after a moment, his tone laced with pride.
It was amazing to see my brother settling down and smiling. His happiness and love showed in everything he did, in every glance toward Scarlett. She was his world. I couldn’t imagine ever dating again, not after losing the love of my life, but if I ever did, I hoped to have what they did. Theirs was the kind of love that filled your chest until there was no room for hurt; the kind of love that left you breathless.
Reaching across the table, I wrapped my hand around his, needing my brother to know how important he was to me. “And I’m lucky to have her… and you. Maybe one day, I’ll find something like what the two of you have, but I have a feeling it’s a once in a lifetime thing, and I’ve already had my soulmate.”
Pulling into the drop off lane, I squeezed Evie’s hand, the ritual as much a comfort to me as it was to her. She was only on a hybrid school schedule, going to school three days per week, but having her away from me was hard. I’d only just gotten her back. “Remember, I’ll pick you up right after school.”
“I know, Mommy.” Her smile was the kind that crinkled her nose and made her entire face glow. “And then we can go to the bookstore and see Auntie Scarlett!”
“We can certainly do that, nugget.” The familiar tug at my heartstrings sent a smile onto my face as well. Letting go was never easy, but this routine—our little morning dance of reassurances—had become the steady beat to the start of each day, whether she was going to school or not.
With a quick kiss on my cheek, she pulled on her backpack, the one adorned with vibrant stickers she’d chosen herself, and joined the crowd of children bustling through the school doors. I lingered for a moment longer, ensuring she melded safely into the sea of uniforms before I finally drove away.
The drive to Tangled in the Pages Two was short, only three miles from Evie’s school. As I parked and stepped out onto the sidewalk, the late spring air filled my lungs, carrying with it the scent of freshly brewed coffee mixing with the fresh mountain air, nothing like what we had lived with in New Orleans.
The bells above the door chimed as I walked in and my gaze immediately found Ethan, who was lifting a box of newly arrived books onto the counter. Customers milled about, their fingers trailing over spines, while a few stood at the cafe counter.
“Need a hand?” I asked him, slipping behind the counter and grabbing my apron.
A smile spread across my brother’s lips, one I was seeing increasingly as of late. “I’ve got it, Cara, but we may need some help at the register.”
I nodded, aiming for the front of the store. “Got it.”
Heading toward the register, I passed Scarlett as she meticulously arranged a display of books, unconsciously stopping to rub her baby bump. It was a testament to the new life they were building together and how far she had come since her ex-husband, Joshua—who was thankfully no longer wasting oxygen—had tried to erase her existence. When she noticed me, she smiled, her dark eyes lighting up with genuine affection. “Good morning, Caroline.”
With a few customers at the register and only one cashier handling everyone, I didn’t stop to chat, but I touched her forearm as I passed. “Good morning. That looks great.”
Even in a small mountain town, there was a steady stream of customers throughout the day, making time go by quickly. Between helping customers, restocking shelves, and brewing cups of coffee for those seeking a quiet corner to immerse themselves in a good book, I ran around all day, barely finding time to take a break. If anything, it prevented me from getting lost in my head, a place I sometimes needed an escape from.
Arriving back at the bookstore with Evie in tow later that afternoon, I’d barely put the car in park before she jumped out of the car and bolted into the building. After a long day at school, I would have thought she would have had less energy. I was exhausted.
Crouching, Scarlett wrapped Evie in a hug. “Hey, sweetie! How was your day?”
Before Evie had a chance to answer, Ethan grabbed her and lifted her off the ground, tickling her sides and sending her into a fit of giggles. “We got a new toy train today, munchkin. Wanna play with it?”
“Y-y-yes. P-p-put me down!”