Chapter Thirty-Seven
Brody
Maggie was staring at Abbey the way she sometimes did when questioning someone on the stand.
I was preparing for her to at any moment start a sentence with, “Please state your name for the record,” before questioning her about that stupid kiss.
Abbey, for her part, didn’t seem to notice. Or pretended not to. In the crowd of us, it was easy to focus on anyone else. Unfortunately, that anyone else happened to be me, only serving to infuriate Maggie further.
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. Maggie next to me, Abbey across from me, and the rest of my friends scattered around the table of the pizza parlor around us, the air was thick with tension that only I seemed to be aware of.
“So, what’s the deal with you two, then?” Matt C. asked, gesturing between Maggie and me with a fry between his fingers.
I didn’t say anything, figuring I’d let Maggie explain it for herself. She was the one sitting here jealous over my ex-girlfriend.
Her attention snapped to him, body rigid.
The table seemed to pause, everyone apparently interested in her answer. I relaxed back in my chair, hoping to take the pressure off, even slightly. To act as if my entire existence didn’t depend on her answer.
“The deal?” she asked carefully, narrowing her eyes on him as if she might intimidate him into retracting his question.
“Are you together?” he asked, matching her gaze confrontationally.
“Why? Are you jealous?” she asked, in a way I knew was meant to buy time.
I leaned back in my seat, ready to let her take charge of the conversation, because Matt wasn’t the only one eager to hear her answer.
I had a lot riding on it. Because I knew Maggie, and if she was as threatened by Abbey as she seemed to be, I knew she’d make some type of public claim, even if she wasn’t ready to get back together now.
That was fine, though. If I had hope for our future, then I could wait. But if she still denied it… if she opened up the door for someone else to swoop in… well, I didn’t want to think about what that meant for us.
“Actually, a little,” Matt said with a laugh. “Brody hasn’t been back home in years and the only reason for that is probably you.”
He didn’t say it in any harsh way, on the contrary, it sounded more like a joke than anything else. But I still felt irritation prickle against me at the insinuation.
“Hey,” I said, “that’s not true. I’ve been home.”
“Like twice.” He scoffed.
“We’ve been more than that,” Maggie looked to me with concern in her eyes.
I could see what she was thinking. Wondering if it was her fault that I hadn’t been home. But it wasn’t. I hadn’t wanted to go home because, well, I was content where I was. I missed my family, yeah. But we’d found ways to see each other over the years.
“I play hockey,” I countered. “I don’t exactly have the most flexible schedule to work with.”
“We’re getting off topic,” he waved my comment off, shaking his head.
I rolled my eyes.
“Basically, I’m just asking if you’re together or not.”
Maggie was silent. My hands felt jittery.
“You’re really invested in my dating life, Matt,” I said, trying to lighten the atmosphere.
“I think we’re all just a little confused,” Tara said gently. “We all thought you broke up, but now you’re here together…”
I sighed. Everyone was nosey as hell and the last thing I needed was my relationship under a microscope while we were still trying to figure it out ourselves.
“But you’re here, so you guys must be something, then, right?” The question was a dagger aimed directly at Maggie.
She looked up at me, eyes scanning the entirety of my face as if it were the first time.
“He’s my best friend,” she answered them, never tearing her eyes off mine.
I stilled, fighting the urge to suck in a breath, because I could’ve sworn she was looking at me with something. And for half a second, I felt like I was on the verge of reaching her again.
“Mags—” I started, but Abbey spoke at the same time, her voice louder than my own.
“So, you’re not together?”
“We’re—” I started.
Working through it? Getting there? Going to be fine?
I’m not even sure what would’ve come out of my mouth because I never got the chance to say it.
“No,” Maggie answered flatly. “We’re not.”
And there it went. My heart deflated like a balloon in my chest. My last shred of hope gone.
If Maggie, my territorial, means-business Maggie, was admitting we were over in front of someone she viewed as a threat, then I guess that meant we really were.
It wasn’t enough to hope that someday she might change her mind. To linger in her life and wait for her to be ready, while consoling myself that she didn’t really mean it.
Because all that would do was hurt me more, giving me a front row seat to watch her find someone she actually wanted. Someone she didn’t hesitate to say yes to.
I slumped back in my chair, feeling the finality wash over me.
Everything in my life had fallen apart in a matter of weeks and I felt like I’d been trying to tie it back together with threads of cobweb.
Maggie’s phone rang, and her fingers darted toward her purse, desperate to reach it.
“Excuse me,” she said, looking at the name on the screen. “This is for work, I have to take it.”
And then she took off toward the door, phone pressed to her ear, apparently as eager to escape the table as I was.
My heart shattered into pieces and we hadn’t even gotten our entrées yet. Perfect.
“So,” Matt clapped his hands together. “Now that that’s settled, what’s the move?”
“The move?” I responded dumbly, rubbing a hand over my face in utter exhaustion.
“You’ve got nothing keeping you here anymore. You’re free.”
“Free?” I asked.
I was never trapped.
“You and your girl are dead and buried—” Aiden cut in.
I groaned, taking a long chug of beer. “So not in the mood to recap that right now.”
“No, no, dude. This is a good thing,” Aiden responded, while the rest of the guys nodded their agreement.
I snorted. “I’m failing to see how my life falling apart is a good thing. Every plan for the future I had revolved around that girl being in it.” I gestured toward the door she left from.
“You’re looking at it from the wrong angle.” Matt shook his head. “You have to view it as an opportunity.”
“Just tell him what you mean,” Abbey rolled her eyes.
“We think you should come home,” Tara interjected, beating them all to the punch.
“What?” I nearly choked out a laugh. “I can’t go hang out in Michigan for a week. I have a job.”
“We don’t mean a vacation,” Matt said. “We mean, like, come home.”
“Again, I have a job,” I repeated incredulously.
“Your contract’s almost up,” Tara defended.
“And don’t all you hockey guys retire in your thirties, anyway?”
“Well, yeah, but—”
“So what are you going to do? You don’t have a life here anymore,” Tara said.
“That’s not true,” I argued. Even though, now I guess it kind of was.
I was staying on the couch of my ex-girlfriend’s brother. And yeah, technically he was my best friend, but how would that dynamic change now that Maggie and I were over?
She wouldn’t want her ex-boyfriend lurking in the shadows, and I wouldn’t want to make her uncomfortable by lingering in the background of her life.
I had the hockey team, I guess. But they were all young guys just starting out in their careers, and I was past the point of wanting to spend my free time bar hopping.
Liam already had retirement on his mind, and stubborn bastard he was, it was only a matter of time before he finalized that decision.
And Cassie—sweet, nervous Cassie—would be wracked with guilt trying to navigate maintaining a friendship with her best friend’s ex-boyfriend.
Tara, harsh as she was, was right.
There was nothing left for me in Boston but loneliness and heartbreak and reminders of the life I almost had.
But Michigan? I hadn’t consistently lived there since I was in high school. It was nostalgic. And comfortable. But was it my future?
“What would I even do there?” I asked, wondering if I was insane to even be considering the possibility of going back.
“The same thing you’d do here.” Tara shrugged. “Take some time. Regroup, figure stuff out.”
“Only this time,” Matt said, “you’d be surrounded by your friends.”
“So, what?” I asked, leaning back in my chair. “Is this something all of you have talked about?”
“Pretty much, yeah,” he said as they all nodded their agreement.
“I can’t believe I’m pathetic enough that I needed an intervention.” I rolled my eyes.
I looked to my sister, hoping to find some answer in her eyes directing me toward the right path. Just like that day at the lake when I’d fallen in the frigid water, it seemed like she was here to pull me out of the life I was drowning in.
“Look,” she said, reading the pain in my expression. “I know you loved Maggie. I did too. But you can’t make someone want to be with you. You just have to stick with the people who do.” She finished with a shrug, and a sad smile that only made my heartbreak more.
“We want you to come home, Brody,” Abbey said suddenly. “I want you to come home.”
I looked at her and saw the girl I’d grown up beside. She didn’t look that different, really. Same freckles on her cheeks. Same eyes that looked at me in a way that hadn’t changed despite the years or time between us.
It would be so easy, to step back into my old life. Apparently, it was still waiting for me. An option I hadn’t even known I’d had.
I had enough money to get my own place. I could work for my Dad, give him a chance to take the back seat a little bit now that he was getting up there in age. I could be surrounded by places and people I’d known my entire life. It would be comfortable. Familiar. Safe.
Just when everything had fallen apart, my friends were here to hand over the pieces and the opportunity to put them back into place. If I wanted to.
I opened my mouth to respond, but stopped when the scent of Maggie’s perfume filled the air. Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue. I let myself breathe it in one last time.
Maggie didn’t need me anymore. Maybe she never did. But back in Michigan? I could be useful there. I could be needed.
“What did I miss?” Maggie asked, sliding down into the chair.
“Not much,” I said. “Just making some plans.”