Chapter 7 #2
She nodded, staring down.
“Don’t blame yourself. Some psychos are good at hiding their agenda.” Just then, I noticed the bruises forming on her wrist.
“Fuck.” I stepped back, ready for my fist to explain stuff to Nathan, who was still on the ground, when Melinda stopped me once more.
“It’s nothing. I’m okay. Mase, please don’t fight.”
“I’m gonna kill him. I swear, one day, I’ll kill this jerk.”
She cradled my cheeks with her hands, and the expression on her face captured my eyes. “No, you won’t. Listen to me. You are better than him. Never let your rage take control of you. Don’t stoop down to his level. He’s not worth it. Besides, he didn’t do much. It’s nothing.”
“It didn’t sound like nothing to me.”
She swallowed, emotions flashing across her features for a split second. “It could have been much worse.”
“Want me to grab you the sweater Paige keeps in Craig’s Jeep?”
Melinda glanced down at her ruined shirt. “Nah, I think I can manage. Thanks, though.” She tied the bottom in a knot, hiding the damage, before fixing her shorts. She exhaled a long breath and forced a smile, unable to hide the tremor in her voice. “Huh…all good.”
“You sure?”
She swallowed and smiled, trying to project fake confidence. “Yep.”
I hung my head and nodded. “Okay, then. You should go back to the party. Don’t stay out here all by yourself.” I didn’t give her time to reply and walked in the direction opposite to the cabin. Feeling eyes on me, I glanced at her over my shoulder.
Melinda eyed me with a frown. “Where are you going?”
“Home.”
“Home? Are you going to walk there?”
“Yep.” I turned my head, waving at her over my shoulder. “See you later, neighbor.”
Before I could put too much distance between us, she caught up with me. “Mason. Wait.” She appeared in front of me, blocking my escape. “Why did you tell Nathan I was your…huh…girlfriend?”
A groan formed in my throat. “I meant girl friend. Not girlfriend.” I swallowed. “Obviously.”
She searched my face as if she was trying to decipher the words I hadn’t spoken out loud.
If she looked too closely, could she tell I’d just lied to her and the truth was that the word girlfriend had tumbled out of my mouth and it didn’t even bother me because it felt right when I said it?
Afraid she could read my thoughts, I skirted her and continued my retreat.
Melinda jogged after me and grabbed my arm from behind, slowing me down. “Stop.”
“Nah, I’m out of here. Already told you.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing except Asshat over there.” I pointed behind me where we’d left Nathan.
“You’re riled up because of what went down with Nate minutes ago?”
I muttered something under my breath, not in the mood to explain the extent of my feelings for her and why I was in such a piss-poor state.
“I’m done. You should really go back to the party instead of staying here all by yourself since—” I cocked my head and looked at her, losing my train of thought.
We stared at each other for an infinite second. Awareness spread through my body at her proximity.
She let go of her grip on me as if our connection had set her fingers on fire and rubbed her palm over her shirt. “Can I…huh…can I join you? Walk home with you, I mean… I don’t feel like being here anymore either.”
“Fine.” I shrugged. “Whatever pleases you.” I fished my phone out of my back pocket and shot my brother a text. “Told Craig we were leaving.”
“Oh…okay. Thanks.”
For the next ten minutes, we walked side by side in silence.
The energy between us wasn’t as uncomfortable as I thought it would be.
More like charged with something hard to define instead.
It felt as if our silence translated the secrets none of our words could, an unspoken conversation nobody else was privy to.
“I thought you hated me,” I said after a while.
“You just saved me from being assaulted. The last thing I feel for you is hate.”
I nodded once.
The night was dark now, thanks to a thick cover of clouds. Not even a sliver of the moon or a tapestry of stars lit up the sky anymore.
The treetops danced, and we heard an owl somewhere in the distance and crickets chirping around us. Our footfalls blended with the night sounds.
The breeze picked up, and Melinda shivered, hugging herself to keep warm.
“You cold?” I asked.
She turned her head to look at me. “A little. It’s fine, though. I’ll survive.”
Before she could react, I slipped off my hoodie and handed it to her.
Melinda pushed it back with a hand. “Keep it. You’ll be cold too.”
“Nah, I run hot. Don’t worry about me.” I placed it in her arms. “Take it. I insist.”
“Thanks.” She put it on, and on her, it landed mid thigh. Something close to possessiveness flooded my heart.
We continued our stroll, new silence falling upon us.
Our neighborhood looked different in the dark. Other than the one car that passed us, the streets were deserted.
“Are you ready to resume training and all?” Melinda asked when we crossed the park and took the path circling the soccer field.
I shoved my hands into my pockets. “Yah. The guys are ready. Pre-season training has been good. Coach believes we have another chance at State this year.”
“Nice.”
“How’s yours? Are you ready to go back out there?”
She swallowed and twisted her hands in front of her.
“I think so. There’s a lot at stake this year.
I can’t screw this up. My future and my college application depend on my being not only great, but also exceptional.
I won’t accept a second place. Being the winner of the losers isn’t good enough anymore. First place is my goal.”
“Love the ambition. I can relate.” I paused. “It’s okay to have great and not-so-great-days too, you know. It’s sports. It’s part of the game. Losing is not always a bad thing.”
She halted, watching me with a scrunched-up face like I’d said something terrible.
“When you lose, it teaches you something valuable...” I shrugged. “Like how to improve your technique…how to perfect your mindset... Then you appreciate each victory much more and you’re humbler about your performances and your wins.”
“When you say it like that, it makes sense.” We resumed our walk.
“The thing is… There’s this girl… Emery Mellencamp.
She swims for McKinley High. She always climbs to the top of the podium.
Always beating me by milliseconds. She’s good, like really good, you know.
The truth is that…I wanna beat her so bad.
First place and all. Not just for the medley relays, but solo too.
I know I have what it takes. I just need to be consistent and push a little more.
I gotta see that my efforts and dedication are paying off…
That I can be the best. More than once. Sure, I win against her often, but overall, she’s still number one. ”
“I respect that. I like being at the top of my game too. I thrive on being the best.” We turned into our street. “Just make sure you do it for the right reasons. Being the best, I mean.”
Melinda blinked, looking confused.
I glanced at her to make sure she understood what I was saying. “Do it for you. Not for anyone else. It has to be your victory.”
“I won’t… I-I’m not. It’s me I’m challenging.”
“All right.” Silence stretched between us. “Sometimes I feel like I’m the product of everyone else’s expectations of me.” I couldn’t believe I was confiding in her about my own insecurities.
“What do you mean?” She stopped to look at me, but I kept my gaze locked on the ground instead.
“Like I’ve become whoever other people wished I’d turn into instead of myself. Not just on the field…but elsewhere too. In my life in general.”
“Can’t you just refuse to partake in whatever they expect from you?”
I shrugged. “It’s not that easy... The game is all mine.
Nobody is forcing me to play or to be great at it.
It’s the other things… I’m not my true self around a lot of people.
” I avoided her eyes, feeling naked as I disclosed the piece of information I usually kept quiet about.
“Anyway, forget I said anything. I’m just in a foul mood tonight.
Don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay. I’m okay.
” Because you’re here with me and not with that jackass.
“You sure? It’s fine if you’re not. Nobody will hate you because of it.”
I added nothing.
Minutes later, we stopped on the sidewalk in front of Melinda’s house. “Thanks. For walking me home.”
“Anytime.” I turned to leave but spoke before she could let herself in. “And Mel? Keep the hoodie. I’ve almost outgrown it, and it looks better on you anyway.”
She looked flustered under her porch light. “Huh…you sure?”
“Yep.”
“Okay. Thanks?”
I bobbed my head once and strolled toward my house.
For a while, I stood in the entryway, immobile, not sure how to define my night.
Did Melinda and I finally share a moment?
Because it oddly felt like we did.
I had no better way to describe the time we’d spent together tonight and the camaraderie we’d experienced for once. A warm flicker inside my chest confirmed my theory wasn’t too far-fetched.
Moments later, I climbed the staircase and locked myself in my room. Lying on my bed, I tried to make sense of the last hour. Before I could come up with an explanation, my eyes closed, and I lost the battle as sleep claimed me.