Chapter Nine - Zoe #2
Once I’ve disposed of them, I grab my jacket and rush out of the apartment, my heart still racing, the tension never quite leaving my chest. I need to get out of here, away from the chaos of everything. I can’t think, can’t breathe, not in this space.
The morning is still crisp outside, but it’s better than the suffocating air inside. I keep walking, trying to clear my head, trying to forget about the man who’s determined to invade every corner of my life.
But I know, deep down, that I can’t escape him. And part of me doesn’t want to. It’s like a game and we’re both trying to see who will break first.
***
The evening air is crisp as I walk home from my store, the familiar chill cutting through my jacket.
Jenni stopped by earlier, and for the first time in days, I felt like I could breathe again.
We spent hours talking, laughing—she didn’t even have to try to make me forget about Lukin.
For a few hours, I was able to focus on me, my friend, on my designs, on my future.
But now, as the cold nips at my skin, I’m back to reality. I hunch my shoulders against the wind, my thoughts momentarily drifting back to the store, to the bustle of the day. I force myself to keep going, to put everything else out of my mind—Lukin, the flowers, everything.
As I press on, I hear it.
A whistle.
I turn, instinctively looking over my shoulder.
A man is approaching fast, a smirk playing on his lips as he gets closer. I try to quicken my pace, hoping I can outrun him, but he matches my steps, his presence looming behind me.
“Hey,” he calls out, his voice laced with a mixture of arrogance and casual intent. “You’re so sexy.”
I feel my pulse quicken, unease creeping up my spine as he steps closer. “Let me have your number. I promise I don’t bite,” he adds, his grin widening. “Unless you ask.”
His wink feels like a threat, but before I can react, a shadow falls over me. A tall figure steps out from the darkness.
A man, dressed all in black, moves with purpose, silently intercepting the guy. He yanks the man away from me, spinning him around with a force that makes the stranger stumble.
“Get away from her,” the tall man growls in a thick accent, his voice low and dangerously calm. “Before I hurt you.”
I’m frozen, my heart pounding in my chest, unable to make sense of what’s happening. The stranger scrambles back, eyes wide with fear, and without a second glance, he runs off, disappearing into the night.
The tall man doesn’t move, his posture still rigid as he stands between me and the path the other man took. His face is unreadable, cold. He doesn’t speak a word, just watches me, his presence as commanding as it is unsettling.
I stand there, my breath shaky, unsure of what to say. I’m still trying to catch up with what just happened.
Finally, I take a step forward, my voice unsteady. “Who the hell are you?” I demand, trying to sound more confident than I feel. “What the hell just happened?”
The man doesn’t answer me. He doesn’t say a word, his eyes never leaving mine. Then, he steps aside, his stance still protecting me.
“Go home safely,” he says, his voice low but firm. “It’s taken care of.”
I open my mouth to ask again, but the words die in my throat. I know. I know who sent him. The thick Russian accent has given it away.
He’s from Lukin.
A mix of confusion, frustration, and something else I can’t name floods me.
He knows where I live. He’s been watching me. And the worst part? I don’t know whether to be angry or… relieved. I choose angry.
I glare at the man in black, even though I know none of this is his fault. “Leave me alone,” I snap, my voice shaking with anger. “I don’t need your help. Just get out of my way.”
But he doesn’t move. He doesn’t even flinch.
I feel a scream building in my chest, something primal, something I can’t release. The weight of his silence presses down on me, and the more I stand there, the more I feel trapped. This isn’t protection. This isn’t help. This is control.
I can feel my skin prickling, the chill of the night creeping in around me, but it’s not just the cold that makes me shiver. It’s the thought of him—Lukin.
I storm off, my heels clicking harshly against the pavement, my breath coming in sharp, angry bursts. I don’t even look back. I can’t.
But even as I walk away, even as I try to put distance between myself and the situation, there’s a gnawing feeling deep in my stomach. I realize, with a sinking heart, that Lukin doesn’t even need to show his face to have this power over me.
He’s been watching me. Always watching.
The realization sends a shiver down my spine, the feeling of being tracked—no, monitored—making me feel small, exposed. He’s keeping tabs on me without saying a word, without revealing anything. He doesn’t need to. He’s always a step ahead, and I can’t escape that.
Part of me wants to scream, to rage at the intensity of it all, but the other part of me can’t stop wondering… is he watching me right now? Can he see me right now? Anger turns into excitement, but I instantly catch myself before it festers. I’m so stupid. How can I be excited about this?
I’m still burning with fury when I get home, the heat of it simmering in my chest, refusing to fade.
My thoughts are a chaotic mess, swirling between frustration, confusion, and something darker I can’t quite place.
The encounter with the man in black, the flowers, Lukin’s constant presence in the back of my mind—it’s all too much.
And then, as I stand there in my apartment, the idea hits me.
I don’t want to run anymore. I don’t want to hide.
I want to take control.
I grab my phone, dialing Maria’s number before I can think it through. She answers almost immediately, her voice bright but distracted.
“Hey, girl.”
“Maria, hi.” I wrap an arm around my midriff and lower myself onto the couch. “How’s the application going?”
Maria is applying for an exchange year program in France to get away from her family’s watchful eyes and tonight, more than ever, I understand her.
She sighs. “I already sent my application a long time ago. The waiting is so, so hard, but I’ll manage. I’ve been waiting to hear back from the school. But it looks like there’s a breakthrough in sight. Fingers crossed. And what about you? What’s up?”
I can hear her typing in the background, so I take a deep breath before speaking. “I need a favor.”
“Oh? Anything,” she replies, clearly happy to help.
“I was wondering if I could use your name to get into the club again,” I ask, my voice steady, but my heart races.
There’s a pause on the other end. “Wait—the club? You want to go there again?” Her tone shifts from casual to excited.
“Oh my goodness. You want to go to the club?” Maria gushes.
“I’m so excited for you! Yes, girl, loosen up.
Have fun! I know you’ve been working a lot. You deserve to enjoy yourself.”
I laugh, shaking my head a little. If only she knew the real reason why. I don’t even know why myself, but I can’t shake the feeling that I need to go back to the place where it all started.
“I’ll call the bouncer there and put your name on the list. Okay?” she continues, her enthusiasm unwavering.
I let out a small sigh of relief, grateful for her eagerness to help. “Thanks, Maria. I’ll be coming with someone too. Can you let the bouncer know?”
“Of course, babe. Who are you bringing?” she asks.
“It’s just Jenni,” I answer quickly, not wanting to explain too much.
“Oh, okay,” Maria gasps, a teasing lilt in her voice. “I thought you found yourself a man. Never mind.”
I can’t help but laugh at her response, a wave of amusement washing over me, even though part of me is still simmering inside. “Nope. Just Jenni.”
We laugh together for a moment before the conversation quiets down.
“Thanks again, Maria,” I say, my voice softer now. “I’ll let you know when we’re heading out.”
“Anytime! Go have fun, Zoe. Loosen up, okay?”
“Will do,” I reply, then hang up the phone.
I sit there for a moment, looking down at my phone, the weight of my decision settling in. I don’t even know what I’m looking for by going back. Maybe it’s curiosity, maybe it’s obsession, or maybe it’s just a way to regain some sense of control over all the chaos swirling in my head.
I quickly text Jenni as I hurry into my bedroom to take a shower: You want to go to the club tonight?
Her reply comes almost immediately: I wish. I’m out with Ben.
I roll my eyes, even though I know Jenni can’t see me. Ben. Her on-and-off boyfriend. To be honest, I don’t even understand why she’s still with him. He’s always been a problem—too immature, too unreliable. He doesn’t deserve her. But she insists on holding on, and I’m not going to argue with her.
I quickly text back: Okay, babe. Have fun.
Thanks, will do, Jenni answers.
I sigh, my phone still in my hand. Part of me considers just going to the club alone, but I don’t want to. If I do find Lukin in the club tonight, I need a buffer, someone who would keep me balanced and anchored to the ground.
But there’s no one to go with, and I’d rather brave going alone, than sit here and wait in silence, consumed by thoughts of Lukin while the next bouquet gets delivered to my door.
What would it be this time? Chrysanthemums?
Lillies? I don’t care. I throw my phone on the bed and head into the shower.
I’ll go alone.