Chapter Twenty-Six
I know I’m a distraction to her. I know that sometimes she pushes and lashes out, just so I’ll give her something that’ll help her forget for a while. And every time I try to tell myself I won’t take the fucking bait, it’s a lie. I’ll take it every single time she dangles it out in front of me.
And then feel like shit when we’re done.
I’m still leaning over her as I finish, breathing in the sweet scent of her skin, and the softness of her hair. I keep thinking one of these days, I’m going to break through the fucking walls she surrounds herself with. I want her so bad that I’m ripping myself open for her, and she doesn’t even realize it.
She’s still so hung up on him.
That thought brings me sudden irritation, and I pull out of her. I push myself off the wall and adjust myself. I snap the button on my jeans, and leave her there, panting from the fucking high I just brought her.
“Where are you going?” Emma calls after me as I head for the door.
“Air,” I say to her, raking my fingers through my hair. She doesn’t realize that she’s stripped me of power. She’s the Delilah to my Samson, cutting my fucking hair and draining me of the ability to be anything other than her toy. And the worst part is…
I still hope it’ll change—that the mentions she’s made of her future kids, homes, whatever, will lead to her wanting them with me.
Is this how Henry feels about Lydia?
If it is, no wonder he damn near killed himself to have her. I thunder down the stairs, startling Major as I head for the front door. I don’t care that I left Emma in the room with all the information about her. I don’t care if she finds it. I only kept it from her to protect her feelings—which maybe is the wrong thing to do.
As I step outside into the cool breezy morning, I freeze at the ringing of the gate—the sound that someone entered the code and is heading up my driveway. I bristle, watching and waiting for what’s to come, and hoping like hell it’s either Henry or Jude.
No one else living knows this place. Not even Ivan.
The sight of Jude’s black F150 is a relief, and he parks outside of the garage. I eye the house, hoping like hell Emma gets decent as I make my way to where Jude is. Once again, I notice how muscled up he is.
“Why’re you working out all of the sudden?” I joke, slapping his back.
“After the mess with Henry, I realized maybe I shouldn’t be such a pussy,” Jude grunts, slamming the truck door. “And speaking of, I’m not going to be able to keep Lydia at bay forever. She’s on me worse than Henry.”
I grimace. “I just don’t think it’s safe to tell anyone.”
Jude nods, raking his fingers through his hair. “I think you’re right. I found a tracer in our system. I was able to back it out, but he’s prying, Luca. He’s prying hard, and I need to check your system.”
“I’m surprised he hasn’t dug up this location,” I say, leading him back to the front door. “Manny had it, and he knew how important it was to keep it under wraps. The fact he didn’t blab it makes me feel bad for knocking him.”
Meh, actually… Not really.
Jude stays quiet on it, probably reading my face. Jude is good at shit like that. Actually, Jude is good at almost everything except the actual doings of this kind of job. He’s never had the balls to kill someone, himself. But damn, if he did…
As we step into the entryway, I don’t see Emma. I keep my eyes peeled as Jude and I head upstairs for the cave—the place I just fucked her. The door is still open as I step inside, and my brows instantly raise.
Emma is sitting at the computer, watching an interview with Jared. My demons are back to gnashing their teeth inside their cage, and I’ve never wanted to murder someone so fucking bad. The things I would do to that man. Maybe then she’d move on.
He fucked someone else.
He hired someone to kill you.
I want to shout at her, wring her pretty neck until she gets it. But I take a deep breath and shut my eyes for a few seconds instead.
“You have to bury the rage, Luca. Emotions lead to mistakes—especially rage. And love, but you’ll never understand that one.” Victor’s voice plays like a record in my head.
“You really shouldn’t torture yourself with that,” Jude’s voice comes out painfully soft, so fucking understanding in a way that I just can’t.
Emma spins around in the chair, but not before hitting the spacebar to stop the video. I expect to see tears in her eyes, her poor little heart breaking over her sick obsession with her ex-husband.
“Are you sure it’s him?” Emma asks the nerve-grating question for the hundredth fucking time.
Jude is silent as he steps forward, grabbing the spare chair. He takes a seat and positions himself right beside her. His shoulders almost brush hers, and jealousy rips at me in an embarrassing way. I’ve never felt this kind of shit, but I’m starting to realize this is the norm for me now.
“Here,” Jude reaches across her to the keyboard and mouse, adjusting it in front of himself. “I can show you—after I make sure there’s no tracer.”
“Ivan?” Emma surprises Jude.
He turns to me, his brow deepening. “How much have you told her?”
I shrug, already sensing the disapproval. “Almost everything.”
Jude shakes his head, mumbling something under his breath as he returns to the keyboard. The room fills with silence for the next ten minutes as he removes the tracer on the system. He then heads for the deep, dark web.
“Is this where people advertise for murder?” Emma’s voice is small.
“Yeah, pretty much,” Jude answers her. “I can’t get into the Big Man’s files, but I found Jared this way…” He navigates to a discussion. “He makes this for Fury, which is a false company that’s used—and that doesn’t really matter, but that’s what leads him to us. It changes constantly. Anyway,” Jude blows out a sigh. “This has since been deleted, but if I follow the trail…” He clicks through multiple screens, and my stomach flips as it ends with the GPS location of Emma’s house.
Emma leans forward, reading the date and time stamp. “He did this from my house…” Jude clears his throat, looking back at me with concern.
“Yes,” I answer without any emotion. “He did it right under your nose.”
“Wow,” Emma draws out. “That’s…”
“A lot to process for you, I’m sure,” Jude says quietly. “I’m really sorry this is happening to you.”
I’m not. She should fucking hate him.
“It’s okay,” Emma turns to Jude. “But maybe I’d have been better off dead.” She says it in a joking tone, but it’s devoid of humor. She means it. That’s how bad this is hurting her, and I want to hurt him.
But she doesn’t want that.
My eyes flicker to the window, taking in the now overcast skies. It’ll be only a matter of time before the summer storm rolls through the valley. If Emma was a storm, I’d be the willow beneath her, bending to her every fucking wish. I’ll let Jared live. For her. But only for her. Even though she still… loves him. Even though it feeds the monsters inside of me—will I self-implode if it continues?
“Luca?” Jude’s voice cuts in. “You good?”
“Yeah,” I say, adding a chuckle to make it count.
“Thanks for showing me this,” Emma says to Jude, pushing her chair back from the desk. “I needed it.”
“No problem.” Jude watches her as she stands to her feet. She heads for the door, passing by me. As she does, she runs her fingers across my torso, leaving a trail of goosebumps in her wake. I want to grab for her, hang onto her, and then smother her until I’m the only man she ever sees when she closes her eyes.
I watch her leave, drinking in the sight of her in those black leggings, giving me the perfect view of her ass. My guess is she brings plenty of men to their knees without much effort—and I’m just another victim.
“What’s going on between the two of you?” Jude asks as soon as the door closes. “Because there’s no way you’re doing all of this just for Henry and Lydia.”
“It’s complicated,” I answer him.
“It reeked of sex in here.” Jude leans back in the chair. “Which isn’t surprising, but I’ve never seen you so…”
“Pussy-whipped?”
Jude chuckles. “Yeah, something like that. I can tell she’s got a hold on you, which explains Manny’s death better… I mean, you never snap.”
“Guess I do.” And I need to right now.
“I get it. Sort of. I was seeing someone for a while, but it didn’t work out.” His words are flat. “It never fucking works out for me. I’m the good guy.”
“Yeah, well, it’s never worked for me either,” I tell him.
“Because you never wanted it to,” he clips. “That’s the thing with Henry, too. He never had an interest in it working out, and then bam, he gains interest, and it does.” His tone is wry as he rolls his eyes.
“Yeah, well, I don’t think it’s working out for me. She’s… hung up.”
Jude nods slowly, putting it together. “Oh. Shit. Yeah…” His reaction is enough to bring the rage back—and I need to do something about it.
“Can you watch her for a while?”
“What?”
“Can you stay here with her for a while?”
Jude narrows his eyes. “Depends… What’re you going to do? Because you need to stay away from Jared—and any of this mess right now. You’ll bring it right to your door. Ivan’s watching it like a hawk.”
I nod. “Won’t touch him. I just need to blow off a little steam.”
Jude takes a deep breath. “Okay. Go.”