31. Ambrose
Ambrose
After Zeth and I left the barn, I returned home to dress, and we both walked into town.
Along the way, I prepared myself to talk to Father, thinking through all the things I wanted to say to him.
I only hoped I didn’t forget them all. It helped that my relationship with Zeth was out in the open now.
It motivated me for what I was about to do.
Now, I stood before my father’s massive oak door. In my hand, I held the nameplate I made for my father’s desk, freshly stained in dark wood with raised letters painted in gold.
Okay, Amby, you can do this.
I let out a breath and knocked on the solid door. When my father’s voice called me in, I turned the knob and went inside. His expression immediately fell, but he recovered quickly and nodded my way.
“Ambrose,” he said in greeting, before returning to his work scribbling something out on a paper.
I shut the door and stepped up to his desk. For a moment, we were both quiet. My mouth felt dry as I started, “I wanted to speak with you. About last night.”
My father remained quiet and continued writing as if I weren’t there. I ran my thumbnail over a piece of the nameplate, waiting for my heart to stop pounding. As long as I stood in this office, it never would. But I had to be strong, as Zeth always told me I was. He believed in me, in us.
“Zeth and I… we want to turn the laundry into a furniture and antiques store. I will continue living at home and keep working here at the bank to help invest in our plan.”
I waited for him to respond, but he never looked up or said a word. The only sound between us was the rough scrawling of ink along the paper.
“I’ve been in love with Zeth for a long time,” I continued, my face flushing.
“I have a feeling you knew. He’s always had my back growing up, he’s always been there for me, especially after Mother passed…
” This dented my father slightly, as a visible wince appeared on his features, but it was gone as quickly as it came.
“And Mother used to say that when you love someone so much it aches when you’re parted, that it’s true.
I became someone I didn’t want to be when Zeth left Everdeen.
When he came back, I found myself again. We found each other.”
My father wasn’t responding to anything I was saying, and I still had so many things I needed to say.
My hands began to shake, and the sweat built on my brow.
I had set out to tell him the truth, to show him I was no longer under his wing.
That it was time to let me fly free from his cage of obligations.
I had to do it for him, but also for myself.
“I suppose what I’m getting at is… I’m sorry that I couldn’t take over this bank one day, as you hoped I would.
I know how much it means to you. All I’ve ever wanted was to please you, to make you proud.
” I tried not to choke on my words, but I did anyway.
Thankfully, I recovered enough to calmly say, “But if I want to be true to myself, then I have to do what I set out to do. And that’s to be with Zeth, to make my own way in life with the things I enjoy. ”
This roused my father’s attention, as he paused his writing, but only for a moment.
He was set on ignoring me until I fell into line.
There was no talking with him, it seemed, but I had tried, and that was the best I could do.
He would have to see that I wasn’t going to wait for his permission or acceptance anymore.
“I’m available to talk more, father and son, whenever you feel it’s best for you.” When he gave no response, I gripped the piece of stained wood in my hand and set it on top of his desk.
My father looked up at it, and then his eyes darted to me for the first time since I’d started talking, and I smiled softly at him. “There’s a particular person in our family who would benefit from taking over your legacy. You should consider her.”
I backed away, leaving the nameplate engraved with “Somerset Heritage Bank” on his desk before turning for the door. I left swiftly, my sweaty palms slipping on the knob as I hurried out of the room. When I shut the door, I exhaled and closed my eyes.
I had done it. I had faced my father and told him what I wanted, and also what I was going to do from now on. It surprised me how good I felt, despite not hearing him utter a word to me. It invigorated me. Made me feel as if I was in control of my life for once.
Smiling, I straightened my jacket and raised my chin before I made my way to my desk.
***
I left the bank early to walk to the laundry with a bag of supplies.
Zeth’s kitchen window still needed fixing if he was going to continue living there.
I wondered how it might be to live with him.
Waking up next to him in bed, no matter where it was—even in a hayloft—was enough to keep me happy.
Then to work together, making both our dreams come true, was a bliss I’d always hoped for.
He’d taken my toolbox and two pieces of wood already this morning to work on some repairs, so I hoped the extra things would be a nice surprise for him.
My thoughts were so far up in the clouds as I made my way along the sidewalk that I didn’t even notice Damien Cooligan standing against the general goods shop until he laughed and said, “Well, well, look who it is.”
When I glanced over, Damien threw me a sheepish smile and tipped his hat.
I walked past him without even sparing a nod.
He came up beside me anyway, keeping up with my pace. “You still sore at me?”
“There’s nothing for me to be sore at. The fact is, you’re an asshole, and you won’t leave me alone. Until Zeth came home, you acted as if I didn’t exist.”
Damien straightened his jacket as he walked. “Well, you were trying to court all those women, so I let you be. But then you actually started noticing that prick.”
My jaw clenched as it hit me. Damien didn’t take my search for a wife seriously, so now he was jealous.
Apparently, everyone but my own father knew I was full of shit for the past couple of years by trying to court women.
Or perhaps Father had known and was just in denial the whole time.
I knew I was. It was honestly laughable now.
“What’s with all the stuff? Giving gifts to that tramp?”
I opened my mouth to curse him again, but Damien wasn’t worth my anger. Instead, I said, “Zeth is a much better man than you’ll ever be, so calling him something he isn’t only makes you look like a fool.”
“He’s a nobody,” Damien spat. “A poor boy with nothing to his name but the dirty shoes on his feet. He’s trying to fool everyone into thinking he and his homely sister came into some money so he can marry into money instead. I don’t like hypocrites.”
“Like the pot calling the kettle black,” I snapped, shaking my head.
“Don’t you realize he’s just using you?”
For a moment, I let his words get to me before I walked faster. He was ridiculous, and I was determined to get away from him. Unfortunately, the devil wouldn’t leave me alone and continued to follow me.
“I know a conniving man when I see one, and Washer is it,” he went on. “He lost his chance with Miss Winters, so he’s moved on to you. You’re just too naive to see it. He’ll ruin your family name.”
“Good. It’s time we Somersets made some changes.”
Damien’s words were toxic, but I was grounded in my love for Zeth. I knew he loved me indefinitely.
“Aren’t you hearing me, Amby?” Damien grabbed my arm to turn me around, and I pushed him off me. He sneered, “Washer doesn’t belong here. I’ll just have to see to it that he knows that.”
My fists curled instinctively around my bag at the threat. “You leave Zeth alone, or I’ll deal with you myself.”
Damien’s eyes flashed with fire. Rather than say anymore, he turned and walked away.
A part of me wanted to follow him and punch him right in the face, while the other part hated to cause a scene on Main Street.
Grown men didn’t get into fights; they fought with words.
Unfortunately, Damien stopped listening long ago, and he was becoming an incredibly big thorn in my side.
I tried to remove him from my thoughts as I approached Zeth’s home.
When his freshly chipped door came into sight, a layer of purple was now featured in the rainbow.
Smiling at it, I knocked, and he opened it with a welcoming grin.
I placed the bag of supplies in his arms, making him grunt, and kissed his stubbled chin.
“I brought a few things to replace in here,” I said, taking off my cap and jacket to hang on the hook, feeling so comfortable in this place already. “Mostly cabinet knobs for the kitchen upstairs, and extra supplies to clean.”
“That’s really great of you.” Zeth unloaded the items onto the counter. “I’ve been thinking about you all morning. How did it go with your dad? Did you two get a chance to talk?”
His question was so simple, yet full of so much care.
“I did,” I said, looking down. “I told him the truth, that I’ve always loved you and that we want to open our own shop.”
“I’m proud of you,” Zeth replied affectionately. “And what did he say?”
I leaned my back against the counter and stared at the ground with a shrug. “Nothing.”
“What do you mean?”
“He scribbled on a paper at his desk, looked at me once, and said absolutely nothing to me…”
“That’s fucking rude.” His jaw clenched tightly, and his fists curled. “Do you want me to go back with you?” Zeth’s frustration was mounting, but I was already past any anger.
“No, I told my father what I wanted to say and that’s that.” I raised my chin and pushed off the counter to face him. “It could have gone worse. He could have told me to leave, or fired me. He didn’t do either.”
Zeth’s glare darkened, so I uncurled his fist to kiss each of his fingers until I came to his ring. Its black color further exposed his unease.
I smiled sheepishly. “You’re cute when you’re protective.”