Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Irina
Nikolai invites my father over for dinner.
“Do you have to?” I ask, pacing around the living room.
Nikolai gave me another dress and heels to wear.
I think he likes playing dress up with me.
I don’t deny him it. After what we shared – how he touched me so intimately and saved me from that man at the club – I feel closer to him than ever before.
For the first time since my dad betrayed me, I feel like there’s hope.
“Yes. He’ll be over in a few minutes. It would be rude to cancel.”
“Rude to the man who sold me off?”
Nikolai pulls me into his arms. It’s almost frightening how nice his touch has become. “I don’t like your father either. But this is the only way to keep him under my thumb. He agreed to work with me. It’s better than killing him.”
“Is it?”
He frowns. “You really want me to kill your dad?”
Shame fills my heart and I avert my gaze, even though I know Nikolai has done terrible things himself. “No,” I admit. “I may hate him but I can’t order his death. I don’t have that in me.”
“I’m glad. I like that you’re good. Compared to me.”
That only makes me think of how many people Nikolai has killed, which is a number he still hasn’t given me. “I just hate that he gets off scot-free.”
“He won’t. I’ll make him work for me. That’s punishment enough. I’ll have him do work he doesn’t want to do but I also need to placate him. He needs to think we’re equals. I can’t have him causing problems that could put you in danger.”
My mind flashes back to Alexei. My stomach is feeling better now but I still have the bruises to show from that experience. Even once they fade, I’ll never be able to forget it.
“I didn’t thank you,” I say, “for saving me at the club the other night. Thank you.”
“You’re my wife. I’ll always keep you safe.”
Even if Nikolai is still a danger to me. He might never beat me or rape me but just the fact that he’s a high ranking Bratva man puts me in danger. I would be better off on my own where no one could find me but I know Nikolai would never let me go and I’m not sure I want to run from him again.
“I want to believe that,” I say.
“Then believe it.” He gives me a tender kiss that reminds of me of the pleasure he’s given me so far. I know there’s still so much more we could explore but I keep holding out. Keep waiting for the other shoe to drop before I give myself over to Nikolai completely.
The doorbell rings. My father has arrived.
He waltzes into the room like he owns the place. I grit my teeth and take deep breaths, trying to calm myself. Screaming at my dad right now won’t get me anywhere.
“Ivan,” Nikolai says, shaking his hand.
“Pleasure finally doing business with you.” His eyes flick to mine. “Daughter.”
“Dad,” I say in a tight tone.
He frowns. “Is that anyway to speak to your father?”
“You sold me off for your own selfish reasons so I think I have the right to be angry with you.”
“I’m here to work with Nikolai. I suggest you change your attitude.”
“You’re only working with my husband to avoid getting killed because you know you’re out of options. Don’t pretend otherwise.”
“That’s enough,” Nikolai says. His tone speaks to no disagreement. “I hired a chef to make us a nice meal for tonight. Let us not waste it.”
We all settle in the dining room. Nikolai sits at the head of the table while I sit to his right and my father sits directly across from me.
It takes everything inside of me not to scream.
Not to run. Just the sight of my father fills me with so much anger that I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to get rid of.
“So, Nikolai, when will my debts be paid off?” My dad digs into the steak before him. His chews are loud and impolite while the sauce covers his mouth. He never did have manners.
“When you work for me for an extended period of time. I have some jobs for you to do. That will help pay them off.”
“I was thinking more along the lines of we work together and I get a cut of your earnings. That way I can pay off my debts faster. I’m not some lackey. I’m Ivan Koslov. I don’t do petty work.”
“Yet, you were fast to sell your daughter off when you needed money,” I snap, unable to help myself. Nikolai gives me a hard look but otherwise doesn’t comment. I lower my gaze to the table. The food before me doesn’t even look appetizing given how much my stomach is in knots.
“I was desperate. You have to understand. But I’m a changed man now. I’ll work to pay off my debts but I won’t do petty jobs. I’ll get a cut of your earnings, Nikolai. This way we can be in power together. You always wanted us to work together initially.”
“And you declined,” Nikolai says. “Saying that you didn’t want to work under me.”
“Which is why I’m proposing we work side by side. I’m not beneath you. That’s a good deal, don’t you think? I mean, you married my daughter without my consent. How do you think that makes me feel?”
I glance at Nikolai and see how tense his jaw is. Clearly, he doesn’t like what my father is saying either.
“You got my daughter in the end,” Ivan continues. “So it’s only fair we work as equals.”
Nikolai slowly nods and extends his hand. “Deal. Equals.”
After shaking my husband’s hand, my father gives me such a smug look, it makes a piercing hot anger course through me. “See, Irina? I’ll be in your life still. That should make you happy. I know you’ve missed me.”
“Missed you?” I hiss. “I hate you!” And before I can stop myself, I pick up my fork and throw it at my dad’s face.
He jerks back, barely avoiding getting hit in the eye.
“You are terrible. You’ve betrayed me and yet act like I should be grateful to you.
I’ll never love you again!” This time, I pick up my knife.
But Nikolai’s hand clamps down on my wrist. “Irina, stop. Get control of yourself.”
“And you.” I whirl around on Nikolai. “How could you do this to me? You said you would protect me and yet now you’re going to work side by side with the man who’s cut me so deep, I’m not sure I’ll ever recover.
I know you’re doing this to keep the peace.
But who cares? What about me? What about what I need?
You’re being selfish too. You’re not doing this for me. ”
“That’s enough,” Nikolai says. His tone is hard but I don’t care. I’m done caring. “You need to sit back down, Irina. You’re acting immature.”
“I’m only eighteen. I think I’m allowed to act a little immature.” I try to pull my wrist away but Nikolai doesn’t let me go. “You’re hurting me.”
That finally makes him release his fingers. “Irina, stop this.”
“I want you to make my dad suffer. I want you to punish him. Not reward him. It’s not fair.”
“Life isn’t fair,” Ivan says in the most condescending voice imaginable.
That’s when I see red. I run around the table and before I can stop myself, slap my father across the face. He jumps to his feet, indignation covering his features, as if he has the right to be angry.
“That’s enough,” Nikolai says. “Ivan, get out. We’ll talk about this later when Irina isn’t here.”
Ivan huffs but to his credit, he does leave. He probably doesn’t want to piss off Nikolai again now that he has the advantage.
“What are you doing?” Nikolai asks. “You embarrassed me tonight.”
“You don’t get to say that to me. Not after what you did. You’re going to work with my father. The father who betrayed me. How do you think that makes me feel?”
“The only other option is to kill him, which I would gladly do, but you don’t want him dead.”
Tears hit my eyes. “I just… I just want to be happy. I just want to feel safe. And I can’t feel safe when he’s around.”
“I will keep you safe, Irina.”
“No. You can’t. Not when you’re… you.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I’ll always be in danger because of you. Won’t I?”
He can’t disagree because he knows I’m right.
“I can’t stay here tonight,” I say.
He huffs. “Where will you go? I’m not letting you just walk out that door unprotected.”
“Then get me a hotel room for the night. I just need space. Please, Nikolai. Give me that. I need to think.”
“You belong here with me. I’m not letting you run again.”
“Fine,” I snap. “Then I’m sleeping in the guest room tonight. And you can’t stop me.” I storm upstairs and to the guest room, even slamming the door behind me, which I know is immature. Nikolai doesn’t bother me for the rest of the night.
After a few hours of sitting in my anger, I decide to leave the guest room. I can’t stay in this house tonight. Nikolai gave me money. I can just get a hotel room somewhere.
I know it’s na?ve to leave without Nikolai knowing, especially after what happened with Alexei but I can’t talk to my husband right now.
So I leave the house without telling him.
The guard on duty, Sergei, is out front but he has his back to me.
I tiptoe past him and around the side of the house and climb the wooden fence. It’s fairly easy to do.
Then I take off running.
It takes me around an hour before I find a hotel to stay at for the night. I can’t use cash to book the room so I have no choice but to use my credit card. Nikolai will find me eventually but this will give me time to cool off in the meantime.
After booking a room for the night, I head across the lobby when I hear…
“Irina?” a female voice asks behind me. I spin around and come face to face with Simone, Nikolai’s ex-girlfriend.
“Simone. Hi.” I’m really not in the mood to talk to my husband’s ex right now.
“What are you doing here?” She makes a show of looking around. “Without your husband?”
“Just having a girl’s night.”
“Ah. I see. Where are the other girls?”
“They’re already in our room,” I lie.
She tilts her head to the side and gazes at me with an expression I can’t make out. “Why don’t you join me at the bar. We can have a drink together. Talk. I’m curious about you and Nik. How you met. How you fell in love and got married so fast.”
“I’m really tired…”
“I insist. It’s on me. Come on. It will be nice to chat.”
After how I acted with my father, I don’t have it in me to fight Simone so I agree to go with her to the bar in the hotel. We settle in at one of the tables. She orders a fruity cocktail for herself and a mocktail for me.
“Since you’re not twenty-one yet. Nik told me you were only eighteen. That’s young.” Her tone is judgmental like it’s my fault that I married Nik when he forced me into it.
Our drinks arrive and Simone starts talking about random things I don’t care about. I feel sleepy and annoyed and just want this night over with.
“You haven’t touched your drink yet,” she says.
I blink, realizing I zoned out. “Oh.” I take a large gulp of it, even though there’s no alcohol in it. “Sorry. I’m just tired. I should get to bed.”
But the moment I stand up, a wooziness overtakes me and I slump back into my seat. My head doesn’t feel right, like it’s foggy. I can barely make out Simone next to me.
“It’s ok, Irina,” she says. “I’ve got you.” Except, her tone is not reassuring.
It only sounds menacing.