CHAPTER 19
Maya
THE HOLIDAYS WERE OVER IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE. Christmas was a big deal in my family, so the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Year’s were jam-packed with endless parties, dinners, and festivals.
By the time I emerged from the champagne-soaked revelry with a hangover and one missing heel (thank you, New Year’s Eve blowout bash at the Vault), I’d made up my mind: no more parent-arranged dates. I’d find my own.
My grandmother had been right. I’d gotten too comfortable with being alone, and it was time I pushed myself out of my comfort zone.
So, I went on dates. Lots of them, with men I met at the café and the bar and out jogging in Central Park. By the time February rolled around, I had a contact list filled with suitors, many of whom were duds, but there were a few I wouldn’t mind going on a second date with.
Honestly, it was already better than last year’s batting average.
However, that didn’t stop my stomach from coiling into knots as I walked into work on Friday.
Sebastian and I had an in-person meeting scheduled for—I checked my watch—right now.
It would be our first face-to-face since my birthday, and though I’d tried to put him out of my mind since then, all my anxieties came rushing back to the surface as I approached our shared office.
Breathe. There’s nothing to be nervous about.
We weren’t on bad terms. Our emails were perfectly cordial, and we’d even exchanged virtual greeting cards on Christmas. But I couldn’t forget the echoes of what happened—
Stop it.
Last year was last year. It was time to put the past behind me—including whatever vibes I thought I’d felt with Sebastian.
I reached our office. I braced myself and twisted the knob, expecting to see Sebastian’s rumpled hair and lazy smirk waiting for me inside.
“Sorry I’m late. I—” I stopped. The room was empty.
My brow furrowed. I scanned the office and spotted an orange Post-it note stuck to the table, right in front of my usual seat.
Can’t stay for today’s meeting. There’s a production emergency. I tried calling, but your phone was off. Email me, and we’ll reschedule. -Seb
I checked my phone. I’d forgotten to charge it last night, and it had, in fact, died during my commute.
A long, unsteady breath seeped through my lips. Relief and disappointment tugged at opposite ends of my emotions. Part of me was glad I wouldn’t have to face Sebastian and the unwanted emotions he inspired, but another part had foolishly looked forward to our reunion.
I wasn’t used to going this long without seeing Sebastian. He hadn’t attended any holiday parties, and though we usually spent New Year’s Eve with the Laurents, they’d decamped to St. Bart’s between Christmas and the start of the year.
I reread his note. Was there really a production emergency, or was he avoiding me? I couldn’t imagine him showing up only to bail at the last minute. If he came all the way here, he had to have a good reason for leaving.
At least, that was what I told myself.
Since our meeting was canceled, I left and went to my regular office across the floor instead. I hadn’t been here all week since I’d been busy with vendors offsite, and I barely had time to settle in before Ezra knocked on my door.
“Sorry to disturb you first thing in the morning,” he said when he walked in. “But I have the documents you asked for, and I wanted to make sure you got them before I’m pulled into back-to-back meetings all day.” He placed the manila folders on my desk.
My heart rattled. Adrenaline pulsed in my veins, but I kept my voice even. “Thank you. I appreciate it.”
“No problem. Let me know if you need anything else.”
I waited until he was gone before I opened the folders with eager hands.
I hadn’t forgotten about my Pittsburgh theory.
The end of last year had been too busy for me to continue my investigation, but now that the frozen foods line was in production and we were making good progress on the launch event, I had a little more time to indulge my instincts.
I’d asked Ezra to compile all the internal communications regarding the Pittsburgh employee’s termination and subsequent arrest. I’d told him I was using them to create new standard operating procedures for similar cases in the future, and he’d bought it without question.
I wasn’t sure what I was looking for, but I was certain I was overlooking something. Although our contamination crisis was in the rearview mirror, it would always be a stain on the company’s otherwise spotless reputation—unless I cleaned it up.
For the rest of the morning, I alternated between actual work and poring over the documents.
I didn’t call Sebastian back, but I emailed him to reschedule our meeting.
By lunchtime, I’d gotten nowhere with my investigation. I blinked away the screen-induced fatigue in my eyes and stretched my arms over my head.
I was starving. I could grab a salad from my usual takeout spot, or… I could go to the ramen place Sebastian recommended last year. I didn’t know the name, but how many ramen spots could there be in the area?
I opened my desk drawer to grab some emergency bills just in case the restaurant was cash only. Most places took credit cards these days, but there were a number of holes-in-the-wall that clung to their old ways.
I reached for the cash bag in the back of the drawer, but I stilled when I noticed a small white box sitting atop some old marketing materials. It was tied with a blue ribbon, and it had definitely not been there last week.
Curiosity edged out my wariness.
I untied the ribbon and opened the box.
My breath caught. I retrieved the item inside and stared at it, my blood a dull roar in my ears.
There was no note, but I didn’t need one.
I knew exactly who’d put this here.
I didn’t speak to anyone about the gift, not even the person who’d given it to me. It was a conversation I wanted to have in person, but I’d have to wait since our next meet-up wasn’t for another week.
Until then, I needed to focus on something else—like the very cute, very present guy I was currently on a date with.
“I hope it’s not weird that I asked you out on Valentine’s Day,” Zack said. “It’s only our second date, so…”
“It’s not weird at all. It’s nice to have Valentine’s Day plans for once.” I winced. “Wow. I hope that didn’t make me sound like a total loser.”
Zack’s eyes twinkled. “I don’t think you could be a loser if you tried.”
I fought a rising blush and glanced around, hoping he didn’t pick up on my embarrassment. I liked him, but I hadn’t been on a second date in so long that I didn’t know how to handle second-date compliments.
It was the Wednesday after my canceled meeting with Sebastian, and Zack and I were having drinks at a beautiful Victorian-themed bar downtown.
With its crystal chandeliers and ornate woodwork, the space was romantic enough to eschew the typical cheesy V-Day decor.
However, it was running a holiday special, and the room was packed with couples taking advantage of both the ambiance and the two-for-one drinks.
“Let’s toast.” Zack held up his glass. “Here’s to discounted drinks and arriving early enough to snag a seat so we don’t have to stand.”
I laughed and clinked my glass against his. “Cheers to that.”
Zack and I met at Ayana’s holiday party in December.
He was a photographer, which was usually a red flag because I’d dated photographers in the past and they all turned out to be fuckboys, but he’d been so funny and genuine that I ended up talking to him for most of the night.
When he asked for my number, I gave it to him.
Our first date was last month. He took me ice skating at Bryant Park, which had been the perfect mix of cute and casual. He’d left for a photoshoot in the Caribbean afterward, but we’d kept in touch via text, and when he told me he was back in town, I’d readily agreed to a second date.
It was going well so far. I just wished I could focus on him instead of the million distractions tugging at my mind.
I brushed aside an errant thought about whether Sebastian had a date this Valentine’s Day and smiled at Zack. “You said you’re a big skier, right? What’s your favorite ski destination?”
“Good question.” He appeared to give it serious thought. “Probably Chamonix in France. St. Anton in Austria is a close second. If we’re talking about the U.S., Jackson Hole and Alta are always a good choice. What about you?”
“I know how to ski, but I’m not a big winter sports person,” I admitted. “Give me a beach and a Jet Ski any day.”
He grinned. “I can see you riding the hell out of a Jet Ski.”
I waited for him to pivot back to skiing or his recent assignment in Aruba, but he changed the topic completely.
“We’ve been talking a lot about me,” he said. “Tell me about you. What have you been up to since the last time we saw each other?”
I masked my surprise with a sip of my drink.
A guy who didn’t talk about himself all night. Now that was rare.
Once I recovered, I told him about my month so far. I tried to highlight only interesting stuff, but the truth was, I hadn’t done much except work, hang out with my friends, and mentally prepare myself for Radhika’s wedding, which started next weekend.
“The wedding is in India?” Zack asked.
I nodded. “I’ll be there for a week. It’s a long time to take off work, especially with everything I have going on, but weddings are a big deal in my family.”
“I can only imagine.” He cleared his throat, his cheeks turning slightly pink. “So, do you have a date for the big event?”
My pulse skipped. “What would you say if I didn’t?”
“I’d say… you could. If you wanted one.”
I swallowed the remainder of my drink, my mind spinning.
I’d resigned myself to showing up without a date because spending a week in India together was a lot to ask of someone I wasn’t in an actual relationship with.
But Zack seemed up for it, and he traveled so much for work that I wasn’t too worried about how he’d handle the trip.
“I definitely want one.” I paused. “Um, that was me asking if you’d like to be my date to the wedding. Just in case it wasn’t clear.”
A broad grin spread across his face. “It was, and I’m more than happy to be your plus-one. As long as you don’t snore during the flight, we’re golden.”
I laughed again, some of my anxiety loosening.
This was good. This was how flirting and dating should be—light and fun, with none of the breathlessness and tension I felt whenever I was around Sebastian.
STOP thinking about Sebastian. Think about Zack. Z-A-C-K. Zack.
Our conversation flowed easily for a while before I excused myself to use the restroom.
I pushed through the crowd, my cheeks flushed and my head light after three cocktails. I was the perfect amount of buzzed, but I did sober up a bit when I took in the long line snaking out of the upstairs bathroom.
“Excuse me.” I flagged a passing server. “Do you have another restroom I can use? Normally, I wouldn’t ask, but I really need to go. Please.”
The woman hesitated. I must’ve looked desperate because her eyes darted around before she admitted in a low voice, “There’s an employee bathroom downstairs. The stairs are behind that door. It’s unlocked. Don’t tell anyone I told you, or I’ll get in trouble.”
“I won’t,” I promised. “And I’m going to give you the biggest tip ever later. I swear!”
With that, I snuck through the door and rushed downstairs. None of the other patrons paid me any mind, and the staff was too busy to notice me trespassing.
Luckily, no one was downstairs. I used the facilities, washed my hands, and fixed my hair before I stepped out of the bathroom.
I made it halfway down the hall when someone cut me off.
It happened so quickly, I didn’t have time for more than a small gasp. One second, I was walking toward the stairs; the next, my back was pressed against the wall.
I stared up at the man in front of me, my heart in my throat.
“Sebastian.”