Chapter 9 #2
We travel the elevator in complete silence.
Denham, me and Bryce … or is it Dan? I don’t know.
Commando one, I’ll call him for now. We stand at the back of the elevator, heads down.
Both of us deep in thought, and Commando stands in front of the closed doors, his feet shoulder width apart and hands clasped behind him.
His holster is strapped across his body, with a gun and a Taser fitted securely.
It makes me curious. I’ve never touched a gun before.
I know nothing about them. I wouldn’t even know what it feels like to hold one for real. Is it heavy? Cold?
The elevator jolts to a stop, and we exit. Commando opens the door to Denham’s apartment, and I look over toward my door. I tug on the back of Denham’s shirt. “I need to get some of my things.”
“No, you don’t. They’ve all been moved,” he states, in a very matter-of-fact way.
“I beg your pardon?”
“I said, they’ve all been moved. I don’t want you going in there. I don’t want anyone going in there. It’s locked up. End of story.”
“But my designs …” I start to panic. What if they didn’t pack them all? What if they didn’t take care of them and just crumpled them and shoved them in a bag?
Denham takes my hands in his and brings them to his lips.
“Relax, Ari. I had Jack oversee everything. It’s all been moved with the utmost care.
The flowers destroyed. And all your belongings are in my room for you to put away when you are ready.
I’ve had the small safe moved too, so you don’t need to worry about any of it. Okay?”
“I’m not sure if it’s okay or not,” I grumble. “You could have checked with me what the next move was. I’m not a small child that needs decisions made for me. I’m a grown woman with my own mind and I don’t appreciate—”
He cuts me off by picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder.
He turns and marches through the open door to the apartment, leaving Commando smirking in the doorway.
I drop my purse, and he strides through the lounge with me slapping him on the ass as we go, screaming at him to put me down.
I’m laughing as you would if someone tickled you.
You don’t like it, but it’s a reaction you can’t help.
I’m only half finding it funny. The other half of me is really, really mad at him for trying to distract me from the fact that he didn’t consider my opinion.
I’m not going to let this go. I don’t want to be beholden to a man again.
I want to stand on my own two feet, and everything that’s happening, is happening fast. No time to stop and consider any of the facts.
I guess normal was never on the cards for me.
“Denham,” I say through gritted teeth. “Put. Me. Down. I mean it … Denham!”
He leans forward and tips me off of his shoulder. I hit the bed with a thud, but I’m cushioned by the deep mattress. I claw at the sheets to sit myself up but Denham pins me before I can get myself into a sitting position.
“Before you start ranting at me about wanting to do things yourself, just hear me out. Okay?”
His hips straddle mine, but he doesn’t allow his weight to rest on me.
His hands rest on his thighs and if I really wanted to, I could get up.
I know he wouldn’t try and stop me. But the pleading tone in his voice tells me to sit tight and hear him out.
“Fine,” I answer agitatedly. I am grumpy with him. But I know it won’t last for long.
“There are many instances in my life where I haven’t acted quickly enough. Lots of heartache could have been prevented if I had just acted on impulse and thought it through later. I can’t take that chance with your life, Ari. I can’t let someone take you away when I’ve only just found you.”
“I’m n—” I interrupt and he places his index finger gently over my lips, stopping the words from coming out.
“I know you want to be independent. I’m not trying to stop you.
In fact, I want you to fulfill your heart’s every wish.
But I can’t let you put yourself in danger.
I can’t live with the guilt that I could have prevented it, if something were to happen to you.
So please, please don’t be angry at me,” he begs.
I sigh. This man. The man that I think I’m falling in love with. The one who is a fierce protector, is as vulnerable in his heart as a small child. All he wants to do is protect me. He doesn’t want to trap me or stop me from living. He’s already shown me so much about opening up and being myself.
“Who hurt you, Denham?” I ask softly. I know there is something he’s not sharing.
The pain is evident in his eyes, and I’m not even sure if sharing it with me will make it any better for him but he taught me that a problem shared, is a problem halved.
The weight of that burden may never go away but it may just become that little bit lighter and easier to deal with.
He swings his leg over me, and perches on the edge of the bed with his elbows resting on his knees. His hands are pressed together and his fingers are steepled underneath his chin. I climb off the center of the bed and sit myself next to him.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But I’m listening, if you do.” I rest my hand on his thigh and stroke him with my thumb.
“My father …” He clears his throat before continuing.
“He … he was an awesome guy. He would have loved you,” he says, smiling my way.
“This place was his pride and joy. When he took it over, it was run down. It was on the brink of collapse and he plowed everything he and mom had into it. He worked twenty-hour days for months and nearly wound up dead from exhaustion. But, once it was running, every second that he sacrificed was worth it. It ran like clockwork. Then I noticed him start to look older, I mean, I know he wasn’t an old man.
But it was like his eyes carried the weight of the world.
He started to lose weight and brushed it off that he had just been too busy to eat properly.
The truth was, he was being threatened.” He unclasps his hands and turns his body to me with one knee propped on the bed.
“You see, he didn’t buy The Kingdom, Ari. He was given it.”
I gasp audibly. That wasn’t what I was expecting to hear.
“What do you mean, he was given it?”
“He had a friend. Simon. They were buddies from high school.” He stands up and starts to pace the room.
I hate to see him so uncomfortable, but he’s fit to burst from holding it in for far too long.
The tension is showing through every pore and it I find it near impossible to just let him talk and not wrap him in my arms and kiss him until he forgets.
Then I realize what’s happening. I feel exactly the same as he does for me.
If there’s an opportunity to take away all the hurt and pain that he’s feeling and prevent him from ever feeling it again, then I would do it. In a heartbeat.
“Unbeknown to my father, he had left this place to him in his will. No one knows why exactly. They had been great friends for many years, and Simon had a wife, who should have been the main beneficiary, but they were both killed in an accident. So we were never able to find out why he had left it to my father.”
“Oh, god. That’s awful.”
He takes a deep breath. “It started off with a few ‘visits’ from a couple of heavies. It was several years after he had taken over and made it very successful. They roughed him up, tried to make him sell the place. Of course, he didn’t want to give it up.
And rightly so, he sacrificed years of his life and missed out on a lot, especially when Tara was a teenager. So, he told them where to stick it.”
I know I didn’t know Denham’s father, but from what he says, they were very much alike and it’s crystal clear how much he loved him. But the guilt on Denham’s part, I don’t understand why.
“I watched it all happening. It was a little each day. The worry tortured him. But he wouldn’t give in.
There was always someone watching him, I saw it with my own eyes, but I relied on him to tell me when he needed me.
Once, there was a package delivered to his office.
He was out, so I signed for it.” He rakes a hand across his face and draws a long breath through his teeth.
“You know, I watched the color drain from his face when he came back and saw that package on his desk. I don’t think it was the first one but it was definitely the last. He threw it into his safe without even opening it.
Kind of, ignorance is bliss, you know? Then we thought they had given up.
” He stops pacing the room to stare out of the window.
His hands on his hips, staring into the sky like it could take him away from the hurt. I don’t speak. He needs this.
“There was three months where no one came around. No one watched him when he came and went. No one bothered him. We stupidly thought it was all over. We thought they had gotten the message and knew that they wouldn’t win.
” I hear the tone of his voice change and it’s all I can do to keep my ass firmly planted on the bed and let him continue.
But I know he needs this. I know he needs to let it all out and as much as I think it’s hurting him, it’s something he has to do to move forward. My silence allows him to continue.
“It wasn’t over, Ari. Not for us anyway. I came back from a night out to find his office light still on. It wasn’t unusual, as he worked so damn hard. When I walked into his office, my life changed forever.”
The tone on his voice changes on the last word and he chokes it out. I can’t sit here any longer and see him hurting so much. I get to my feet and cross the room in just a few strides. My arms find their way around his waist from behind, and I hold him tight.
“They killed him, Ari. He wouldn’t give them what they wanted so they took his life …
they took my dad,” he chokes on a sob as it moves up through his chest, and I feel the pain of it against my fingertips.
He turns in my arms, burying his head in my shoulder.
I’m sure these aren’t the first tears he’s shed for his father, but after seeing how he has taken on the role as head of the family, it makes me wonder if he ever felt like he could show his family this side of how he feels.
I wonder if he’s truly ever had the chance to let it all out and feel like he has someone to share all of this with.
“It wasn’t your fault,” I soothe, stroking his hair with one hand and holding him tight with the other. “There wasn’t anything you could have done to stop it.”
“You’re wrong,” he says, clearing his throat and wiping his eyes with the back of his arm.
He starts to pace again. “I could have helped him. I knew, Ari. I saw it all unfolding but I was too wrapped up in my own life to take note of all the signs. In that package was a single bullet. It was a warning, and I should have known. I could have gotten us some security. Made sure he was safe at all times. Made sure we were all safe.”
“No, Denham.”
“Yes. Don’t make excuses for my selfishness.
I should have done something about it before it was too late and I didn’t.
So, you see … I can’t make the same mistake with you.
” He cups my face with his hands, firmly but not forcefully.
“I’m falling in love with you, Ari. And I don’t want something to happen to you like it did to my father, because I just couldn’t live with myself, if it did. ”
I open my mouth to speak, and he presses his thumb across my lips. “If you don’t feel the same then you need to tell me.”
I shake my head from side to side to tell him that I couldn’t possibly say something that isn’t true.
“No, you don’t feel the same?” he questions, but when he sees me frown, he grins and removes his thumb.
“I do feel the same,” I whisper.
His body relaxes in relief, and mine does too, to think that there’s so much more out in the open now and at least when he’s trying to make sure I’m okay, then I know what’s driving him to be so protective.
“So, please let me do this for you. For us. There’s something going on, and whether it has to do with your past, or mine. I will never live with myself if something happens to you that I could have prevented.”
Oh god, it might be nothing to do with my past. It could be the same people that killed his father trying to settle a score or unpaid debt. He must see the panic in my eyes as I try to process everything.
“What is it, Ari?”
“Well, did they ever find the man or men who killed your father?”
“No. But, they won’t. Not now. There wasn’t enough evidence. No prints, no camera footage, no witnesses.”
“What if …”
“What? They come back?”
“Yes.”
“I have more security in this place now than I ever have had.” It’s his turn to comfort me now and he does it with such ease and confidence that makes me realize how hard it was to let it be the other way around. “I’ll do everything I can to keep you safe, I promise.”
I sigh. It’s not what I wanted to hear tonight, not only because it actually pains my heart to hear the sorrow and guilt in Denham’s voice.
But, because it means that there could be yet another thing we could face in the future, should we have a future together.
Another thing to look over my shoulder for.
Could I do without this? Yes, for sure.
Is it worth it?
For Denham King … Without a doubt.