Chapter 4
CLAY
“I said no gifts,” Chloe chides as the presents pile up on the table at Mile High.
“Yeah, but you didn’t mean it,” Jay says.
Chloe swats at him, and he grins.
Birthdays aren’t worth celebrating, at least when they’re mine. Another year around the sun with my body reminding me I’m not what I used to be.
But today isn’t my birthday, so the celebration is easier.
This week, I could use the distraction from the messy feelings that have been following me everywhere since I learned Nova was back.
The distance from here to Boston wasn’t enough to keep me from thinking of her.
Having her occupy the same city is fucking with my head.
Chloe said she was going out with friends tonight, but Miles and I are friendly, and Jay’s in that friend/ex-boyfriend zone, so by that point, the entire team was coming. So, we ambushed her at the pub.
“What the hell? I thought we were early!” Brooke walks in.
“You are early. I was abducted by a bunch of players,” Chloe says.
“Don’t pretend this isn’t your fantasy every night,” Miles says.
She tosses him a look. “If I’m going to be at the center of a harem, I’d prefer hockey players.”
Jay shudders. “They smell, Chlo.”
“Weird superstitions,” Miles adds.
“No teeth,” I volunteer.
She laughs, but my chest tightens when I see Mari and Nova come in the door behind Brooke.
Nova’s wearing leggings, black boots, and a sweater under her jacket. She’s laughing until she sees me and her smile fades.
It’s hard enough pretending to the world that I don’t care about her.
Making her believe it is another level of torture.
The booth seats eight comfortably, and there are six of us—but five are massive.
On my side, Atlas is on the inside, Miles in the middle, and me outside.
Opposite us, Mari shifts in next to Rookie, squeezing Chloe tighter between him and Jay.
“Nova, sit here. I’ll get a chair.” Miles climbs over me, leaving an empty spot in the middle of the bench.
“What am I?” Brooke demands as Miles grabs one chair, then a second.
“My lady.” He holds one out while Brooke sinks into the seat.
Nova’s eyes lock with mine.
I’m used to keeping my feelings inside, but now I have to look her in the eye and act like she’s not the one I think about every night.
She doesn’t want to sit next to me, but avoiding it is more awkward.
I move over without a word and Nova drops onto the booth next to me, leaving as much space between us as possible without her falling out of the booth.
So, basically an inch.
Her light floral scent invades my nostrils, like it did the other day when she slipped right off that ladder and scared the shit out of me.
Catching her in my arms might have saved her pink head, but it fucked with mine.
I’ll get through the next hour without breathing. No problem.
“Can I get you a drink?” Miles asks Nova.
“Sure, thanks.”
Miles takes off to the bar faster than I’ve ever seen him get back on defense on the court.
“I’ll have a Coke,” Brooke calls after him.
Jay produces a small box and holds it out. “Happy birthday, Chloe.”
She looks at him in surprise. “You shouldn’t have.”
She unwraps it, and it’s an expensive watch.
“It’s beautiful, Jay.”
Miles returns with drinks, sliding Nova’s and Brooke’s over to them.
Nova smiles at him, and I grind my molars.
“Here’s one from me.” Rookie slides over a small wrapped rectangle.
Chloe tugs at the paper to reveal a book. “The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. And it’s signed?” she goes on as she opens the cover, her lips parting in delight.
Jayden’s eyes narrow.
“She posted a Taylor Jenkins Reid book on her socials a while back. I pay attention,” Rookie says.
“You pay attention like that on the court, you’d be making ten assists a game,” Jay says.
“Come on, that’s your job.” Rookie grins.
Jay doesn’t look happy the twenty-year-old is flirting with his ex. Can’t say I blame him.
Brooke passes a wrapped box to Chloe. “This is from me. And Nova. Since we’re roommates, we do joint gifts.”
“You’re what?” I grunt.
“Nova’s staying with me,” Brooke says breezily.
My hands fist under the table.
Because it wasn’t brutal enough already that she’s under the same roof as me during the day, now I know she’s there at night too.
Chloe opens the gift and raises her brows as she takes in the small purple object about the size of her palm. “It’s a vibrator.“
“The best vibrator,” Brooke explains as though she hands out sex toys every day of the week. “Different speeds, vibration patterns—pretty cool stuff. It even has an app so you can control it remotely—which makes long distance relationships a lot easier.”
Miles frowns. “But it’s not—”
“A cock? The best things aren’t.”
“Is that true?” Miles asks Nova with a grin.
Nova laughs. “Women are better at getting themselves off than guys are at getting them off.”
I take a sip of my drink like I’m not remembering how she looked touching herself in the bunkbeds at Kodiak Camp, her skin shining with lake water and sweat.
Brooke nods. “Toys can be a great way to explore different sensations and figure out what works for you. You can find lots of ways to use it with a partner or even solo!”
“When’s your birthday, Nova?” Miles asks.
“In the spring.”
“You want a vibrator or a watch or a book? I’m taking notes.” He grins.
“If I wanted a vibrator, I’d go out and get one. Spring’s a long time to go without satisfaction.”
The group erupts. Jay cracks up, and Brooke claps her hands in delight.
What the fuck?
Nova’s holding court in the middle of the team—my team—like it’s hers and I don’t even exist.
Miles leans in. “If I can help in that department…”
She smiles into her drink. “I have your number.”
I’ve always thought the league needed more quality shooting guards.
Shame we’re going to be down one when Miles meets his demise in about five goddamn seconds.
I have zero problem with a woman taking things into her own hands. It’s healthy and sexy, and watching Nova do just that gave me enough material to last until all-star break.
But if those hands are anyone else’s...
“I mean it. You want to experiment, I’m your guy,” Miles goes on, oblivious.
My brain is a second from imploding, and I swear I hear the clock ticking down.
“You’re not her type,” Mari says to Miles. “Nova likes good boys.”
I cough.
“My sister’s right,” Nova says, her gaze flicking to me as she shifts in her seat. “I like men who are emotionally available. And who have space next to their overinflated egos.”
Hollers go up.
Bullshit.
It’s one thing for her to think I ended it, that I don’t care, as long as it gets her living her best life.
Watching her laugh with my friends, get hit on by my teammate, act like she and I never had anything, is not in the cards.
I’m tense as I lean forward to rest my elbows on the table, knocking a butter knife off into Nova’s lap the process.
“Sorry,” I mutter.
I reach for it, but she’s faster, scooting closer to me and retrieving from her other side.
My hand lands on her thigh.
Nova inhales sharply.
“A guy without an ego isn’t good enough at his job,” Miles says, oblivious.
“What if he’s just humble?” Chloe contends.
Jay smirks. “In sex or basketball, there’s no such thing.”
The group continues talking, but I’m focused on her.
Her softness. Her warmth through the leggings.
I should pull back, but I don’t.
I’ve gone weeks without touching her and I can’t bring myself to stop.
Nova grips the knife in one hand and reaches for her drink with the other, her knuckles going white as she takes a long sip.
“Come on, Clay, back me up,” Jay chides.
I lean my free arm along the back of the booth. “Sounds like you’re doing just fine.”
My hand inches higher.
Nova’s thighs squeeze together, trapping my fingers.
“It’s not ego because before you get there, it’s your responsibility to make sure you are the best,” Miles jumps in.
Another inch.
She bites her lip, shifting in her seat.
They’re all engaged in this topic, but I’m thinking only of her.
“That’s it,” Jay agrees. “You gotta hold up your head and know that you’re taking care of business. All your business.”
Now, I’m touching her through two layers of fabric instead of one.
Nova’s breath catches, and she makes a strangled sound.
Fuck, she’s hot.
And wet.
My knuckle rubs back and forth.
Her eyes meet mine, full of arousal and anger in equal measure.
Nova shoves my hand away and takes off toward the back of the bar, leaving us staring after her.
“She had three cappuccinos today,” Brooke supplies, and the others shrug it off.
I wait two minutes before I go after her, pacing the hallway between the bathrooms.
Feeling her up in a moment of insanity at a public bar? Not my finest move.
But I was coming out of my skin. I could never keep my head on straight around her, and I guess some things haven’t changed.
I’m planning to apologize, but when Nova comes out of the bathroom, she grabs my wrist and drags me into a pitch-black storage room.
“What the hell was that?” she demands in the dark.
“Dropped a knife.”
“It didn’t fall into my underwear.”
My chest heaves. “You and Miles were one mixed drink away from getting a room.”
“I don’t see how it’s any of your business.”
“It is when you’re wet for me.” I reach for the light switch and slam it on. “You once told me how much these fingers turned you on,” I continue, lifting my hand. “You can taste them again if you doubt your memory.”
Her eyes widen with blue fire, her pink hair swinging around her shoulders. “My body doesn’t call the shots anymore, and I don’t owe anything to a man who ended things in a letter the same way my ex did.”
She hurls the words at me like attack, but she’s the one who looks wounded. It’s not the accusation on her face but the hurt beneath that guts me.
I wanted to make room for her to choose for herself, to know she was enough. Instead, I gave her another reason to believe she wasn’t.
How fucking callous I must have seemed.
“You didn’t want me then. I’m not yours now,” she goes on, her voice wavering at the edges. “If you need that hand to play basketball, you’ll think twice before touching me with it again.”
She spins and heads back out, letting the door slam behind her.