Chapter 35
Itake several steps to the right and start walking, completely missing Kieran. Guards and servants look at me as we walk past but I don’t dare look them in the face.
Am I in the wrong? Are they mad at me for saying those things to Kieran?
But it was all true. With the things the person told me and him not believing me. He isn’t thinking it through. What if he tries to kill Avira with the dagger and something happens to him because it isn’t me?
“Are you alright?” Henry asks as we walk out of the palace.
“Do I look okay?” I ask weakly, having no energy to be snarky or argue with anyone else.
“No,” he replies. “You don’t but I don’t think anyone would after a conversation like that.”
“It makes me feel like he doesn’t trust me and what I heard with my own ears.
The person wasn’t Avira, I know that for sure.
I’ve felt that bad dread feeling all my life when I was around her, and this shadowy person didn’t have a trace of it,” I say.
“Why would she tell me that everything is going to be okay and to remain by his side and remember the dagger? Why would she tell me that I was the only one who could do it if it wasn’t important? ”
“Have you thought about it from his point of view?” Henry asks.
I glare at him. “Who’s side are you on?” I ask.
He holds his hands up in the air.
“I have thought about it. I know he doesn’t want me to kill Avira and have the blood on my hands.
I know he doesn’t want me to have nightmares after about killing someone, but I think I will be better off having a couple of nightmares every once in a while, rather than looking over my shoulder every second of the day wondering if Avira is going to appear and do something horrible to me,” I ramble.
“I want her gone just as much as everyone else does, but that’s not going to happen unless I’m the one who kills her.
Kieran doesn’t know if there is going to be consequences if he tries to kill her himself.
I don’t want anything to happen to him.”
“Have you tried telling him that?” Henry asks as we continue to walk.
I sigh and shake my head. “Not yet. This was the first time we talked about it and you saw how well it went.” I roll my eyes and then groan. “I should have waited until we were alone instead of doing it in front of everyone. What are they going to think about us?”
“That you are a normal couple who gets into fights,” Henry replies. “They aren’t going to think differently of you. You guys weren’t yelling at each other and getting ugly. Sure, you implied that he didn’t trust you, but the guards aren’t going to change their mind.”
“How are you so sure about that?” I ask. “Wait. Why isn’t there a Fae with us? I thought Kieran would have had a Fae guard following me.”
“He didn’t want to make you uncomfortable with a new guard, so I’m still your personal guard. There are plenty of Fae who are walking around and will jump in to help if something goes wrong,” Henry says.
My heart melts at his words. Kieran didn’t want me to be uncomfortable with a whole new person.
“That is unless they’ve changed their mind and they don’t like me any longer,” I mumble. “The news has probably already spread to every Fae that we got into an argument.”
“It has, but it’s going to be okay.”
Sighing, I continue to walk down the road. Several Fae have already set up their stalls to start selling things.
“Adeline.” Nila calls my name. “Come here, dear.”
I force a smile on my face as I walk to her. “Nila, how are you doing today?”
She frowns. “You don’t have to force yourself to smile after what happened. It’s okay to feel hurt.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I chuckle.
Nila grabs one of my hands and gently holds it. “You got into an argument with him and it’s good to be feeling those feelings. They are valid and I don’t want anyone else telling you otherwise.”
Tears pool in my eyes and I chuckle once again, trying to make myself happy so I don’t cry.
“It’s okay to cry as well. Things are changing and there are bound to be several arguments in your life. What you have to remember is not to go to bed angry at each other. Resolve it before you go to bed,” she tells me. “Now, do you want a piece of candy?”
I nod and she hands me a bag of lemon candies.
“Thank you,” I whisper and put one in my mouth.
“How about you sit behind my stall for a little while and when you are ready to go back to the palace you can,” she offers.
“Thank you,” I mumble and sit down on the ground behind her stall.
“Oh, don’t sit there!” Piper yells. “You are going to get all dirty.”
I wave her off. “I’m okay. I’m just going to relax a little.”
Piper looks at me with uncertainty but after a while she walks off.
“You rest, and if you need anything, let me know,” Nila turns around and says.
“Thank you.”
I sit there for a while, watching people stop at Nila’s booth and buy things. Every once in a while someone spots me and says hello but nothing past that.
My eyes start to droop and before I know it, I’m falling asleep.
“Thank you for telling me where she was,” someone says. “I was starting to get worried when she didn’t come home.”
“She was exhausted from everything and I saw it. Sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I got so busy and by the time it calmed down it had been several hours,” Nila replies.
“I’m going to take her home. Thank you again for taking care of her,” Kieran says.
“Talk to her and really listen to what she has to say. She cares about you.” Nila chuckles. “Cares about you so much.”
“I will.”
I feel arms grab under my legs and around my upper back, pulling me into their body. I whine but keep my eyes closed.
“You’re okay,” he says. “Everything is okay. I’m just here to take you home.”
“Kieran?” I mumble.
“It’s me, Sweets.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“I should be apologizing to you.”
I snuggle into his chest and allow my body to fully relax in his embrace.
I hum. “No. I should.”
“Sweets.” He sighs. “I should have listened to what you were actually saying and not just telling you no. I was in the wrong.”
I blink several times as I look up at him.
“We can talk about this later. Just go to sleep,” Kieran says.
“Nila told me not to go to bed without resolving this,” I mumble.
Kieran smiles. “Good advice. She said the same thing to my parents.”
“So when we get to the room, we can talk about it?” I ask.
“Yes, we can.”
“You can carry me until then,” I mumble and snuggle into his chest, ignoring the feeling of people’s eyes on me.
I have no doubt that people are going to be talking about it. They were already talking about how Kieran and I got into a fight.
Nothing will ever be kept a secret here. Not unless we do it in a private room.
His chest vibrates as he laughs. “Your wish is my command.”
It doesn’t take us long to get back to the palace and into our room.
“Will it always be like this?” I ask as he sets me down on the bed.
“Like what?” Kieran looks at me as he pulls up a chair to sit in front of me.
“Them knowing that we got into a fight. Them knowing that something is going on between us. Will we not have any privacy?” I fidget with my hands as I wait for his answer.
“Most likely yes… with us walking off and our mood changing then they will most likely know that we got into an argument,” Kieran replies. “But whenever we do we can go to a certain spot so people don’t see us and they won’t be able to tell.”
I hum in agreement. Maybe that would be for the best. I don’t want them to know every time we get into an argument. Then I would never want to get into an argument again and be walking on eggshells the rest of our lives with the conversations we have together.
“Everything is going to work out,” he whispers. “We’ll get used to it and we will find out different ways to hide it from them so they don’t know. But right now it seems like they are keeping tabs on us because in a way they are.”
“Why?” I mumble.
“Because the curse is broken. Because we are finally free to be ourselves and you and I are the High Lord and Lady. We are going to rule over them and they are worried that us getting into arguments in the beginning will put a strain on everything, and they are worried we might not make it through.”
“You know we will.” I give him a knowing look.
“We do but they don’t. We haven’t said anything about how we are doing and that we are going to stay together no matter what.
They are in the dark and are just worried about us.
But we don’t have to worry about anything,” Kieran says.
“We are just going to have to show them that they don’t have anything to be worried about. ”
“Easier said than done.” I chuckle. “I’m joking. We don’t get into many arguments anyway. So I think it will be easy if we just walk around and be ourselves.”
Kieran kisses the side of my head. “Exactly. And when we talk to them they’ll realize just how much we love each other.”
“I love you,” I whisper as I look up at him.
“I love you too.” He gives me a quick peck on the lips.
We sit on the bed in silence for several minutes as we just stare at each other. Having the freedom to just do this is amazing, not having to worry about always being on guard in case someone walks by us.
“I’m sorry for not listening to you fully and trusting you,” he says after some time. “I just didn’t want you to go through anything that you might regret. I don’t want you to have blood on your hands and have nightmares after. To take a life… there are consequences after. You aren’t the same.”
“I know.”
“And I’m worried that you won’t actually be able to do it and she will attack you. You weren’t able to kill a deer,” he points out.
Sighing, I nod. “I know but this is the only way. If it’s what I have to do in order to get rid of her then I’m willing to do it. And I don’t think I will be able to sleep properly for the rest of my life if I don’t do it.”
Kieran cups my face and gently rubs his thumb across my cheek all while staring into my eyes. “Are you sure?”
I nod. “I’m sure and it’s the only way she is going to fully die.”
“We can keep her alive and in a cell hundreds of feet below the ground, heavily guarded.”
“Kieran,” I whisper. “I won’t be able to rest if I know she is still alive. I’m always going to be looking over my shoulder to see if she has escaped or asking the guards if she is still down there. I don’t want to live like that. I don’t want our future kids to live like that.”
Kieran sighs. “I wish there was another way.”
“Me too.”