Chapter Thirty-One Lee
Chapter Thirty-One
Lee
By the time Nico opens the front door I’m still jittering with adrenaline. I can hardly believe I’ve managed to make it inside on my own two feet, because my legs feel like they’re made of rubber.
I knew that kissing Nico properly would be good. I didn’t know that kissing Nico properly would be the sort of earth-shattering experience from which there was no coming back. I can still feel it, little aftershocks of need and pleasure rippling through my body.
There is no possible way he could kiss me like that if he wasn’t interested.
There was no one for us to perform for, no reason to pretend, no excuses between us – that was just Nico and me, and he wants this as much as I do.
The thought has me giddy, I’m high on the sudden rush of complete confidence, a totally alien emotion.
‘I need to grab a few things,’ he says now. ‘I’ll sleep in Phoebe’s room tonight.’
I spin to look at him in disbelief.
‘What?’ I manage. I want to kiss him so badly that I don’t realise I’m actually walking towards him to do it until he puts out a hand to ward me off.
‘Hold up, let’s get you some water.’
My mouth drops open. ‘I don’t want water,’ I say slowly. ‘I want sex. With you.’ Maybe Mei is right and he really needs me to spell this out for him? ‘I want to have sex with you,’ I enunciate clearly. ‘Right now.’
He lifts a hand to his eyes. ‘Fucking hell,’ I hear him mutter as he turns and goes to get me a glass of water. When he returns I haven’t moved.
His jaw is tense as he holds out the glass to me. ‘Drink this.’
I frown. ‘I don’t understand what’s going on. It seemed like you wanted to…’
His eyes are dark, his mouth set in a firm line. ‘I told you already, we’ll talk about this tomorrow.’
‘I want to talk about it now.’ I ease closer and he takes a step back like he’s scared of me.
‘Lee,’ he says firmly. ‘You’ve been drinking. I’m not touching you tonight.’
‘But…’ I frown, sorting through this. ‘I consent. I consent wholeheartedly. I am a fully consenting, very enthusiastic participant in this arrangement.’ I gesture between the two of us with my hand.
And it’s true! I might have a little bit of a buzz, enough to give me some Dutch courage, but I’m not drunk…
it’s a school night! I stopped drinking well over an hour ago.
I know my own mind and what I want. And what I want is Nico and his hands all over me. ‘I’m not drunk. It’s very nice of you to be concerned, but I’m really not!’
I wonder if I should stand on one leg or recite the alphabet backwards or something?
‘Not. Touching. You,’ he says again.
The confidence falls away and cold doubt crawls over me. Did I read it wrong after all? I’m offering myself up on a platter here and he’s turning me down.
‘I can’t believe this,’ I murmur, finally accepting the water from him and holding it in front of me.
‘If it makes you feel better, neither can I,’ Nico says, and he sounds grumpy.
My phone buzzes and I pull it out of the pocket of my microscopic miniskirt.
‘Who is it?’ Nico asks.
‘It’s Adrian again,’ I sigh, reading the message.
I’m in New York for work. Maybe we could meet up for the weekend somewhere? I’d love to take you for dinner. Xx
My heart sinks. Oh god, that definitely doesn’t feel like a friendly message, does it? Is he hoping we’ll get back together?
When I glance up from my phone, Nico is looking at me through narrowed eyes. ‘Who is Adrian?’ he asks and it probably makes me a bad person but I can’t help the thrill that runs through me when I detect a hint of jealousy in his voice.
‘He’s a man I was seeing, in London,’ I say casually, slipping the phone back into my pocket.
‘Was seeing,’ Nico repeats carefully.
‘Well, I wouldn’t be here doing my best to get you into bed if I was with someone, would I?’ I snap, and something like amusement lights Nico’s eyes.
‘No, I suppose not.’ He takes a step towards me. ‘But he’s still texting you?’
I frown down at my phone. ‘Yes, a bit. I should probably put a stop to it but I don’t want to be rude. What would I even say?’
Our gazes tangle for a long moment, then Nico steps even closer, towering over me, invading my space.
My face is tipped back to look at him, and it feels like I’m exposing my throat to a predator.
I swear I see a flash of hunger in his eyes as he lowers his head, as his mouth traces the line of my neck so lightly that I’m not sure if he’s actually touching me, or if the featherlike sensation is his breath skating over my skin. Finally, his lips are next to my ear.
‘Tell him you’re married,’ Nico says in a voice like velvet rubbed against the grain. ‘And that your husband doesn’t share.’
Oh.
I catch my breath, ready to swoon into his arms, ready to be ravished like some sort of historical romance heroine. I give in. Tara was right. I can’t even be mad about it.
Only instead of ravishing me, Nico wraps his fingers around the glass in my hand and drags it up until I’m holding it to my lips. ‘Now drink the fucking water, Daisy.’
I blink at him, my mouth hanging open. When he continues to frown at me, I sip from the glass, then I turn and head for the bedroom, shutting myself into the bathroom with a sulky click of the door.
‘You’ll be glad about this in the morning,’ Nico says from the other side. ‘You’ll know I was right.’
‘Not likely,’ I mumble, yanking off my cowgirl outfit and slipping into the pyjamas I also bought at Target today.
I curse myself for not taking the opportunity to buy sexy nightwear, but in my defence I didn’t know Nico was going to force me to seduce him, and I have a weakness for cosy pyjamas.
These ones are a soft cotton pair of shorts and a T-shirt, covered in tiny pumpkins.
In the bedroom, I can hear Nico moving around collecting his belongings and I brush my teeth with more vigour than usual.
If I thought I was sexually frustrated before, it’s nothing compared to whatever this is.
I’m currently too annoyed to feel embarrassed, but I know that it’s going to hit me later.
‘Have you seen my headphones?’ Nico calls, and then he mutters something about needing a soothing meditation.
‘My AirPods are in the side of my carry-on,’ I call back. Maybe he wants me, just not enough to actually do anything about it, not enough to cross the line from friendship into whatever this is. I shouldn’t really be mad at him for that, but I am.
I’m so deep in thought that it takes approximately twenty seconds for me to realise what I’ve done, but it’s twenty seconds too long. By the time I come skidding out of the bathroom, Nico has my bag out on the bed and is staring down at something in his hand, a thoughtful look in his eye.
‘It’s…’ I start.
‘Lee, it’s been a while, but trust me, I know what this is.’ He lifts the small air pulse vibrator so I can see it.
I swallow. As a sexually active woman who travels a lot, I have zero shame about the handy sex toy I carry in my luggage.
For me it’s as routine as packing my toothbrush.
However, I was not prepared for the sight of it in Nico’s hand.
I was not prepared for the heat in his gaze when he turns to me.
That look is back, the wolfish gleam in his eyes, and my body approves of it wholeheartedly, even as my emotions are pinballing all over the place.
He considers the toy for a moment, rubbing his thumb over the buttons. ‘Have you been using this?’ he asks, his tone conversational.
‘What?’
‘I was just wondering. Have you been using this here? In my bed? In my shower?’
‘Maybe,’ I manage.
He tilts his head, running his eyes over me. It’s a look that I feel everywhere, and I squeeze my thighs together.
‘And what did you think about?’ He takes a step towards me. ‘When you used your toy to get yourself off… did you think about me?’
I hesitate.
‘Tell me,’ he says. It’s a demand, but there’s the bite of something desperate underneath.
My tongue darts out to lick my suddenly dry lips. ‘Y-yes,’ I whisper.
He looks pleased by this confession. ‘Good,’ he murmurs, taking another step forward. I don’t even realise I’ve moved as well, until my back hits the wall.
‘So when I leave you here alone tonight,’ he says, still in that mild tone, his hand coming up to rest on the wall by my face as he leans in. I turn my head, watching the flex of the muscles in his forearm, close enough for me to sink my teeth into. ‘Are you going to use it then?’
My eyes slash back to his.
‘Yes,’ I admit, my fingers curling into the palms of my hands so that I don’t reach for him.
He looks at me, something frantic thrashing in his stormy gaze.
‘Still not going to touch me?’ I whisper, the words a taunt and a challenge.
His jaw tics. ‘No.’
But he wants to. It’s in every taut line of him. He wants to touch me very badly. Whatever the reason is that he’s stopping himself… it’s not because he doesn’t want me.
The realisation settles. I smile up at him. ‘So you don’t mind if I… take care of matters myself?’
Slowly, I reach out and take the vibrator from his hand. There’s a gentle hum as I turn it on.
He inhales sharply. His expression is one of surprise. ‘Now?’ he asks.
‘Now,’ I agree.
The moment stretches between us. A dare thrown down.
I more than half expect him to leave, but he leans even closer, his body a welcome cage around mine. ‘And will you be picturing my mouth on you, my fingers inside you when you come?’
Oh my god.
‘Yes,’ the word is little more than a breath of shared air.
There’s another pause, a feeling like being suspended at the top of a rollercoaster, the instant before the freefall.
‘Show me,’ he says, somehow making the rough words a demand, a plea and a question all at the same time. His posture eases back, giving me a chance to escape.
But that’s the last thing I want.
This time my smile is victorious. My fingers are shaking as I slip my hand into my shorts, and press the toy where I’m already wet and ready.
My eyes fly to his and Nico watches, his face impassive.
‘Turn it up.’ His voice is low.
There’s a click as I press a button and I gasp as the intensity of the air pressure increases.
‘Hold it there,’ he says. ‘Right there.’ I hold the vibrator firmly against my clit where it pulses over and over. ‘Press it again.’
The pressure grows, a beat hammering between my legs as he tells me when to ease off the intensity before turning it back up. As he has me do it again and again.
Click, click, click.
‘Nico,’ I moan, the sensation almost unbearable.
‘Such a good girl,’ he murmurs, and I jolt, the words like a shock of electricity hitting my nervous system. He lets out a rumble of approval, his gaze trailing over my face. ‘Look at you.’
My legs are trembling. His arm brackets me, but he’s not touching me anywhere, and I don’t know why it’s so good, but it is. The way he’s watching me unspool, come undone right in front of him, while he’s totally in control, only the edge of something hot and hungry in his eyes.
I can feel my climax building, can already tell it’s going to shatter me, and he hasn’t even laid a finger on me.
I have to hold myself up and I’m not sure I’ll be able to do it for much longer. Air saws in and out of my lungs, a bead of sweat runs down my spine.
I try to tell him how good it feels but I can’t form full thoughts let alone words. Every nerve in my body is alive and spitting sparks. I’m lightning in a bottle. I’m coming apart at the seams.
‘Let me see, baby,’ Nico whispers, his mouth close enough to the shell of my ear that I can feel his voice like a caress. ‘Let me see how pretty you look when you come.’
The orgasm hits me hard and fast, my hips bucking as my eyes flutter shut. Behind my eyelids there’s an explosion of scattered light. ‘Oh god,’ I moan as my body riots.
When I open my eyes, he’s still there, looking back at me. His pupils have eaten up his irises, his chest is rising and falling almost as heavily as my own. Slowly, he peels himself back from the wall.
He looks at me for a long moment, and nods like a decision has been made.
‘Okay,’ he says.
Then he turns and leaves the room.