Chapter 17
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
dani
I can smell your fear.
His cruel brown eyes and greasy long hair filled my head, and I forced my eyes open, pulling myself from the nightmare.
Sweat covered my back, and I sucked in quick breaths as I sat up in bed.
The monster who’d stabbed me all those years ago was a constant in my life.
He was the reason I could never sleep more than a few hours at a time.
Why I never felt safe. He and his partner had never been caught.
With a groan, I swung my legs over the edge of the bed as I rubbed my hands down my face. It didn’t matter how well I was doing in my life—I couldn’t go a week without that night creeping into my mind while I slept. Cracking my eyes open, I glanced at the clock to see it was three in the morning.
“Fuck,” I muttered, waiting for my heartbeat to slow. I wasn’t going to fall back asleep now. Flicking on the light next to my bed, I stared at the wall, trying to think of anything other than that night.
I let Lucas fill my head instead. His scream when he fell off the cliff echoed in my mind, and my eyes cut to my closet where I’d stashed his pocketknife. I should have tossed it over the cliff. Keeping it was a risk. But it was a weapon I could possibly need in the future.
Did I feel guilty about killing him? Not at all. Especially after I saw Hallie at the café yesterday morning. The relief in her eyes had made it all worth it. But I was reckless. I could have gotten caught so easily if anyone had seen me going into the woods with him.
Next time, I’d—
Nope. I could not think like that. There would be no next time. Especially here in this small town. Deaths here did not go unnoticed. I couldn’t start looking for the evil here because if I did, I wasn’t sure I’d have the self-control to ignore it.
I rubbed my temples, shaking my head. I wasn’t supposed to be entertaining these thoughts. This internship was my fresh start. I could be normal. I promised myself I would be. No more stalking or killing. I’d learned my lesson on how it could wreck my life, and I refused to let it happen again.
At the same time, what else did I have to live for?
My parents weren’t in my life anymore, and I had no siblings.
No friends. It was no one’s fault but my own.
I didn’t trust, and for me, it was easier to keep it that way.
It didn’t bother me when I was busy with school and my…
extracurricular activities, but when I wasn’t doing anything, the loneliness I felt was nearly overwhelming.
Like right now.
Maybe that was why I was so fixed on wanting to find another mark. Lucas had woken me back up, and now I was obsessing. Which was not good.
After standing up, I snatched a large hoodie from the top of my dresser and slipped it over my t-shirt and small shorts. I was wide awake now, and since I had to be at work in a few hours, there was no point in tossing and turning in bed.
The house was dark, and I’d already memorized where everything was, so I crept down the stairs, heading to the kitchen.
Reaching above the stove, I pressed the button, turning on the dim light.
The silence was making my ears ring, so I moved to the counter where Kole had a stereo.
There were no radio stations in this town, but he always had a CD inside of it, usually rock music.
I turned the volume low to avoid waking Kole up before filling up the coffee pot with water.
I tapped my fingers on the counter, impatiently waiting for the coffee to brew.
Being down here instead of my room was doing nothing to stop my thoughts.
I quietly sang along to the song that was playing, glad that Kole had good taste in music.
I froze when a noise came from the back of the kitchen.
My heart dipped as I whirled around, eyeing the laundry room door with suspicion.
I’d been on edge ever since I got chased in the woods and seeing those people behind the house with ski masks.
The door slowly opened, and Kole stepped out, going still when he spotted me.
“What are you doing up?” he asked.
“Me?” I shot back. “What are you doing?”
“Laundry. I got off work late.”
It was then I realized he was shirtless, and my gaze trailed down his muscular chest. Just like his arms, his torso was inked. Fuck me, he was hot. The gray sweatpants he had on was not helping. He cleared his throat, making my eyes shoot back to his face.
“Done checking me out?” he asked, his voice blunt.
My cheeks heated, but I ignored his comment. “Right, it’s laundry night. I didn’t hear you in there when I came downstairs.”
He was in there for a few minutes before I heard a sound. What was he doing in there other than starting the washer?
“I’m always up at this time. You’re the one changing up our routine of not seeing each other.” He ran a hand through his hair, messing it up. “Something happen at work to make you go in early?”
“I’m sure you’d know before me,” I mumbled, raising on my tiptoes to reach a coffee cup from the cupboard. “The sheriff seems to tell you everything. And no, nothing happened. I don’t go into work until later.”
“Then why are you up?”
“You’re not my mother,” I snapped, turning my back on him to pour the coffee. “I can get up without explaining it to you or anyone else.”
“And here I thought we were being civil to each other.” His arm appeared when he reached past to get a mug.
I scoffed. “Civil? We haven’t spoken since you told me to stop coming to your bar. Maybe you need to work on your self-control.”
I set my cup down to get the sugar, but the second I did, his hand landed on my hip and he spun me around. I stiffened in surprise, tilting my face up to glare at him.
“My self-control is perfectly intact,” he murmured, lowering his face until his lips were inches from mine. “If it wasn’t, I would have gone to my room instead of staying in here with you when those shorts barely cover your ass.”
My breath caught in my chest, and for a long few seconds, I debated on kissing him.
Why was I resisting him so much? Because that would only be a complication I didn’t need.
But the last time he’d touched me, I got lost in the pleasure.
Whatever was in my head would be gone if I focused on him instead.
He squeezed my hip, and a flush traveled through me. He could easily distract me.
That would be wrong. Using him for my own pleasure.
“What’s got you all quiet?” he questioned.
“I’m deciding whether to shred your self-control or not.”
Shock flared in his eyes. “Excuse me?”
I smiled, letting heat fill my gaze. “What? You’re the one who grabbed me—who’s still touching me. Go ahead, Kole. Kiss me.”
My words had suspicion flitting across his face. “What changed? You wanted nothing to do with me.”
“Because I have a lot on my mind,” I answered, my pulse strumming from being honest with him. “And I don’t want to think about it right now.”
“So you want to use me?”
My smirk grew wicked. “You can use me too.”
He released my hip only to grab the fabric of my hoodie and tug it up. On instinct, I lashed out, snatching his wrist. I didn’t push him off me, only preventing him from lifting my shirt.
He cocked his head, challenge brimming in his eyes. “Change your mind already? Use me, Dani.”
Tearing my stare from him, I reached to the side to flick off the light. Before I could, he yanked me away from the counter, and then his hands were on my ass when he lifted me until I wrapped my legs around his waist. He crossed the small kitchen, setting me on the opposite counter.
“Kole—”
His lips smashed to mine in a bruising kiss as he ran his hands down the outside of my thighs.
Tingles ran through me, and I opened my mouth, my tongue clashing with his.
He tasted as good as I remembered, and I let out a small moan, feeling the stress fall from me.
As we kissed, I felt him tug on my hoodie again.
My eyes flew open, and I ripped my mouth from him. He stared at me, not looking the least bit surprised that I pulled away. Looking past him, I glanced at the light above the stove. Fingers grasped my chin, pulling my attention back to him.
“The light stays on,” he said with no room for argument in his voice.
I went still, my heart thudding painfully. “No.”
“Then no distraction for you.”
His hands fell from my thighs as he stepped back. The hard-on in his sweatpants was impossible to miss, but so was the determination on his face. He wasn’t going to change his mind.
“Are you serious?” I snarked, crossing my arms. “Scared of the dark?”
“What are you scared to show me?” he tossed back. “You want me, Dani? I know that I want to fucking taste you again. But this time, I want to see every inch of you while my tongue is buried in your pussy.”
His dirty words had a rush of heat shoot through me, and I swallowed thickly as we stared at each other.
But I couldn’t do it. If he saw my scars, he’d ask questions that I really didn’t want to answer.
A phantom pain spread on the back of my neck like it always did when I remembered how I got the burn marks.
My nails dug into my arms until I jumped off the counter and went for my coffee cup.
“What are you hiding?” he asked quietly from behind me.
“Nothing,” I snapped, not looking at him as I took the sugar out. “I don’t like the lights on.”
“I’m not just talking about that. You hide everything about you.”
Stirring the sugar into my cup, I didn’t look at him when he stepped up beside me, pouring himself some coffee.
“That fiery little attitude. Your humor. That singing voice. Your entire personality. You cover it. I’ve barely seen it, and I live with you.”
My mouth grew dry, and I closed my eyes for a moment. This was why I kept to myself. To stop people from asking questions like this. I didn’t even realize how much of my real self I’d let Kole see in the few times we’ve interacted.
“Why?” he asked, sounding genuinely curious.
“I don’t cover anything,” I mumbled. “I just like being alone.”
“Really?” he mused. “I think you’re lying.”
I finally lifted my head to look at him. “You’ll never know when I’m lying, Kole.”
He raised an eyebrow. “I know for a fact that those screams and moans that I coaxed out of you in the storage room weren’t lies.”
“Or maybe I just faked it to help your ego.” I couldn’t help but taunt.
He chuckled. “Get naked and I’ll do it again just to prove you wrong.”
My giggle sounded foreign to my ears, and I stopped abruptly, my heart pounding against my ribs. I couldn’t do this. It wasn’t just about sex. Talking to him was easy. But he was already prying—wanting to know more about me than I cared to share.
I knew I needed to make friends in this town just to keep my mind busy. But not with Kole. He’d try to get too close.
Keeping my mug in my hold, I strode out of the kitchen. “Enjoy the rest of your morning.”
He didn’t respond, and I wondered if he’d actually stay awake after drinking that coffee. He usually slept most of the day from working nights at the bar which was why we barely saw each other.
And that was how it needed to stay.