21. Butch
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
BUTCH
A lthough I’m furious with my woman, I follow her to the stairwell and watch her march her fine ass upstairs to what I assume is our room. She takes the landing to our floor and disappears out of my sight. A few seconds later, a door slams, probably Candy flexing her muscle to show me who’s in control.
If she wants to have a tantrum, fine by me. I’m too damn pissed to care if she’s upset with me. With her safety, I will not submit.
Heated, I storm back into Atlas’s office, ready to go to blows if need be. “Do not think about putting her on the case, Prez.”
Atlas and Gauge exchange an uneasy look. I don’t like it, not one bit.
Blowing out a long sigh, Atlas eyes me warily. “Butch, I think you need to consider this from Candy’s point of view.”
“There’s nothing to consider. I’m not okay with her confronting her abuser in an unknown environment with a bunch of trafficking filth surrounding her.”
“I get you’re not okay with it. But Candy is. More so, she wants to be involved in this covert operation.”
“Wants to be involved?” I scoff, unable to accept Atlas reasoning. “No. She feels guilty. Like Tank, she’s trying to right a wrong. ”
“Candy didn’t volunteer under duress or guilt,” Atlas explains. “Not trying to make you angry by disagreeing with you, but Candy deserves to seek her own vengeance. She’s volunteering because she wants to nail the slimy ball sack to the wall herself.”
“No,” I shake my head, refusing to accept my woman getting herself involved with the dirty work of our business. “It’s my job to protect her. Putting her in contact with the piece of shit who hurt her is not protecting her.”
“Who says you wouldn’t be protecting her?” Atlas asks. “With you beside her, she’d have more courage to pull this mission off while confronting her rapist. The two of you together would be a powerhouse.”
Can I see myself being her anchor while taking on her abuser? Yes.
Would she be spectacular putting on her performance? Without a doubt.
Amazing as she would be, it still doesn’t mean I want her in this vulnerable position.
“Candy is her own person,” Gauge adds. “The survival techniques Candy accrued while in captivity would help her navigate her position in this investigation.”
“And what would her position be?” I ask heatedly. “Be Piero’s arm candy for the event?”
“She did it with my cousin,” Piero says nonchalantly, picking lint off his pants. “It would be a simple enough role to fill again. Only it would be easier, since she doesn’t need to worry about me selling her off.”
My mind feels numb, digesting everything the guys are telling me. It’s impossible to wrap my head around Candy wanting to face her attacker head-on.
“I can’t believe you assholes are considering this. Do you not care about her mental well-being at all? She’s not trained to protect herself if the bastard makes a grab for her.”
“Bro, come on,” Ziggy gripes, entering Atlas office. “If Brandon says she’s solid enough to handle this assignment, we need to weigh his opinion into our consideration.”
The fucking gall.
With my hands on my hips, I snap at my brother. “And what if it was Jared who was trafficked for five years, wanting to be involved in a mission that would put him right back into the path of the sodomizing fuck? You telling me you’d be okay with sending him in untrained?”
“You’re not giving Candy enough credit, Butch,” Ziggy says curtly. “I believe her when she says she’s not going to crumble under the pressure. Candy has dealt with enough pressure in her life to prove her point. Stop downplaying her ability and give her a chance.”
I bite my tongue, turning away from my brother before I say something I can’t take back.
“Piero still needs to contact the ringleader of the trafficking organization, giving us plenty of time to give Candy a quick course in self-defense,” Atlas adds. “The odds of her having to use any defense tactics with us there surrounding her are low. However, in a worst-case scenario, she’ll have enough skills to hold anyone off until we reach her.”
“This is bullshit!” I yell. “What happened to not putting our women in danger?”
“Is she yours?” Atlas challenges, with a raised eyebrow. “Because your attitude is enough to drive a fucking wedge between whatever you thought you had.”
His words halt me. “What?”
“You basically called her weak, incompetent, and too emotional to work this case,” Atlas informs me. “Candy may be a sexual assault survivor dealing with her trauma, but she’s none of the things you were accusing her of.”
“You’ll be lucky if you didn’t blow your relationship out the gate,” Ziggy deadpans.
My heart rate spikes, worry leeching into my nerves. “I’m trying to keep her safe. ”
“No one envies you, brother,” Gauge placates. “But you’ll be interfering in Candy’s healing process if you demand she stay off this case.”
“How?” I ask, baffled.
“Everyone is different when dealing with past trauma. Some bury it. Some manage it in counseling. And then there are some who need to face it head-on, confronting the one who wronged them.”
Gauge’s words sink like lead in my gut. “Are you suggesting Candy needs to confront her abuser to move past what he did to her?”
“I’m not suggesting anything,” Gauge corrects my thinking. “Candy did.”
Holy shit.
She did say it in a roundabout way. I just wasn’t listening.
I run my hands over my head. “Fuck, I’m the asshole in this mess.”
“No shit,” Ziggy quips. “Damage control should be the only thing you should be worried about. Candy working this case sucks for you, but not as much as losing her.”
“How do I fix this?”
Atlas slaps me on the shoulder as he heads out of his office. “Grovel. Grovel like you’re prepared to spend the rest of your life on your knees.”