Chapter 35
Chapter Thirty-Five
Emily
Jared carries me to the living room, pausing at where the halls diverge in different directions with a crooked grin. “My bedroom or yours?”
The question hangs between us as he waits for me to choose. The guest room where he’s been staying as a temporary border, or the bedroom I’ve kept private from him.
“Mine,” I answer, my voice rough.
His eyes flash with surprise before darkening again with desire as he turns left, striding down the hall.
Jared’s breathing remains steady despite carrying my weight, though I catch the slight tension that hardens his jaw.
When we reach my door, he eases me down, my body sliding along his in a slow friction that leaves us both breathing harder. My hands tremble as I turn the knob, pushing the door open to a space I’ve shared with no one since moving to this cottage.
Auren always preferred his own room, forcing me to ask for permission to enter. I’d kept my own room barren after that, a quiet punishment for it never being the place he wanted.
But after he left, I began reclaiming it, shaping it into something that felt like mine.
Now, the afternoon light filters through gauzy curtains, washing everything in golden hues.
My bed sits along the far wall, neatly arranged with the quilt I pieced together during those first lonely months after Auren.
Jared steps in behind me, hands finding my waist again, turning me toward him. His fingers slip beneath the hem of my shirt, palms flat on my stomach as he backs me toward the bed.
“Too many clothes,” he murmurs, tugging at the fabric.
I raise my arms, allowing him to strip the shirt over my head. The cool air prickles across my skin, and I fight the urge to cover myself. His gaze travels over me, drinking in the sight of my sports bra and the curves it contains.
“Your turn.” I reach for the buttons of his shirt to finish what I started in the kitchen with unsteady fingers.
Each button reveals more of his torso, the golden skin marred by the fading reminders of his attack. Yellowing bruises spread across his ribs in abstract patterns, though he’d stopped wearing the binder since the last time I saw him bare.
My throat tightens as I push the fabric from his shoulders, letting it fall to the floor behind him.
I trace the outline of the largest bruise with light fingers. “Does it hurt?”
“Not anymore.” He catches my hand, bringing it to his lips. “Not when you touch me like that.”
I lean forward, replacing my fingers with my mouth. My lips brush the discolored skin in a whisper-soft kiss, and Jared sucks in a shaky breath above me. I move to the next bruise, and the next, mapping the evidence of what he endured with gentle attention.
His hands tangle in my short hair, cupping the back of my skull as I work my way across his torso. When I straighten, his expression holds a vulnerability that matches the pulse racing beneath his skin.
My fingers find the button of his jeans next, and he mirrors the action on mine. We shed the rest of our clothes in a feverish rush, hands fumbling with zippers and waistbands until nothing separates us.
The backs of my knees hit the edge of the mattress, and Jared follows me down as I fall, catching himself on his forearms to hover above me. The weight of him presses me into the quilted surface, his body warm and solid over mine.
I roll my hips upward, seeking more contact.
Jared plants his palms on either side of my head and shifts his weight, pinning me in place. “Let me.”
My brow furrows in confusion. “Let you what?”
“Take care of you.” His mouth finds the sensitive spot beneath my ear. “Let me show you what it’s like.”
I try to rise, to flip our positions and take control as I always have. “I know what it’s like.”
He pushes me back down with gentle pressure on my shoulder. “No, you don’t. You’re always the one giving. Let someone take care of you for once.”
The truth of the words cut through me. I’ve spent so long being the strong one, the provider, the Alpha who protects and serves that I’ve forgotten how to receive.
“I don’t know how,” I admit, the confession painful in its honesty.
Jared smiles against my skin. “Then let me teach you.”
His mouth traces a path down my neck, across my collarbone, lingering at the swell of my breast above my bra. With unhurried fingers, he undoes the snaps and draws down the zipper at the front, peeling it away from my body.
I take in a shaky breath as the constant pressure eases, and my breasts spill free.
Jared murmurs his appreciation as he cups them, thumbing my nipples to hard peaks before the warmth of his breath replaces them.
When his lips close around one sensitive bud, a shock of pleasure arrows straight to my core.
My back arches off the bed, pressing more of myself into his mouth.
Jared’s hands slide down my sides, mapping the contours of my body with reverent attention. His tongue circles my nipple before moving to lavish the same care on its twin.
My breathing turns uneven as he moves lower, his lips leaving a trail of fire across my abdomen. His hands ease my thighs apart, creating room for his broad shoulders as he settles between my legs.
“Jared,” I gasp, the intimacy overwhelming.
He pauses, looking up the length of my body, his hair falling across his forehead. “Too much?”
His concern nearly undoes me. I shake my head, unable to form words as emotion clogs my throat.
“Good,” he growls. “Because I’m nowhere near done with you yet.”
When his mouth finds my center, my world narrows to the point of contact.
His tongue traces patterns that have me clutching the quilt beneath me, my hips rising to meet each stroke.
My body trembles, overwhelmed by the sensations and even more by the realization that someone wants to pleasure me this way.
No one has ever taken time with me like this. No one has ever made my pleasure their focus. Tears threaten, and I blink them away, refusing to let him see how this affects me.
But Jared knows. Somehow, he knows, his eyes meeting mine as he worships my body with his mouth, showing me what it means to be cherished.
I tug at his hair. “It’s too much. I need you inside me.”
Without protest, he rises above me, his body trembling with restraint as he positions himself between my thighs.
The head of his cock notches at my slick entrance, and when he pushes forward, sliding into me inch by slow inch, we both groan at the sensation.
He fills me, stretching my body in ways that make my toes curl into the sheets.
“Fuck,” he breathes, his forehead dropping to rest on mine. “You feel incredible.”
My muscles clench around him in response, pulling him deeper. His hips jerk, driving him to the hilt. The fullness steals my breath, my body adjusting to accommodate him.
“I’m not going to last,” Jared warns, strained as he begins to move. “Been wanting this too long.”
I wrap my legs around his waist, urging him deeper. “Same here.”
His rhythm builds, each thrust sending sparks of pleasure through my core. I arch beneath him, meeting his movements with my own. The slick sound of our bodies joining fills the room, punctuated by our ragged breathing.
Jared’s hand slides between us to circle my clit, layering sensations until a cry breaks from me. His eyes stay locked on mine, absorbing every reaction and leaving me stripped bare.
“Want to knot you,” he whispers into my ear, his breath hot on my skin. “Need to feel you lock around me.”
My heart stutters at his words, and for a moment, I freeze beneath him.
“Em?” Concerned, his movements slow. “Did I say something wrong?”
I shake my head, swallowing hard. “No, it’s not that.”
His hips still, his weight braced on his forearms as he studies me. “Tell me.”
The words stick in my throat, shame burning across my skin. This shouldn’t be difficult to admit, but it is. “I’ve never... locked anyone before.”
Confusion creases his brow. “But you and Auren...”
“He never wanted that from me.” The raw, painful truth spills out. “Said female Alpha locks were too much hassle. Too tight. Too long.”
Hurt flashes in Jared’s eyes, not for himself but for me, and he cups my cheek. “He was a fool.”
The tenderness in his voice breaks loose a fear I’ve carried for years. I turn my face into his palm, kissing the center. “I might not be good at it.”
Jared’s laugh rumbles through both our bodies. “There’s no good or bad, Em. There’s only us.”
He begins to move again, slower now, more deliberate. Each thrust reaches deeper, angling to find spots inside me that blur my vision with pleasure. His gaze holds mine, refusing to let me hide.
“I’m going to prepare you,” he murmurs, thick with desire. “Make room for my knot.”
Before I can ask what he means, his hand slips between us. His finger circles where we’re joined, gathering the wetness there before easing in alongside his cock.
The added width burns, my body resisting the intrusion. I hiss, tensing beneath him.
“Easy,” he soothes, stilling his hips while his finger remains. “Breathe through it.”
His lips find mine in a gentle kiss, his free hand stroking my hair back from my forehead. “That’s it. You’re doing so well.”
The praise sends a different kind of warmth through me, and I force myself to relax, focusing on the pleasure rather than the discomfort.
“Good girl,” he murmurs, the words thrilling coming from him. “Now another.”
A second finger joins the first, stretching me wider. The burn intensifies, but beneath it, a new sensation builds. The fullness borders on too much, my body unsure whether to reject the intrusion or welcome it.
Jared watches me, reading each flicker of motion. “Do you want me to stop?”
The question surprises me. “What?”
“I don’t have to knot you,” he says, his fingers still motionless inside me alongside his cock. “I can pull out enough for you to still lock me.”